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It's only a two-letter word. It's small and simple. Tiny, even. Microscopic. Yet it's sometimes one of the hardest words to say in the English language. It's the word "no." But there are times when saying "yes" to the word "no" can be profoundly liberating, and can assist you in staying true to ... Views: 1131
Research shows that relationships are built from interactions, and interactions are built from moments. A critical moment in an interaction is when one person wants something from the other one. ("Wants" include wishes, needs, desires, hopes, and longings.) The want could be simple and concrete, ... Views: 521
Over the years, I’ve found that there are some questions that I’ve asked time and again about Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and how it works. Thought I’d share them with you- please comment if there are others you’d like me to address in future blogs!
WHAT IS COGNITIVE BEHAVIORAL THERAPY ... Views: 646
Over the years, I’ve found that there are some questions that I’ve asked time and again about Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and how it works. Thought I’d share them with you- please comment if there are others you’d like me to address in future blogs!
WHAT IS COGNITIVE BEHAVIORAL THERAPY ... Views: 637
Plenty of parents call me this time of year, exhausted and tell me, “my teen needs therapy stat!” or “I was fine raising my child but now that he/she’s an adolescent I’m at a loss”. Parenting a teenager is a new and scary experience for most, and to shift how you interact with your children can ... Views: 870
Can you remember a time when you offered a gift to someone? Perhaps a holiday present, or a treat to a child, or taking time for a friend – or anything at all. How did this feel? Researchers have found that giving stimulates the same neural networks that light up when we feel physical pleasure, ... Views: 496
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Breathing - by Mary Fitzpatrick, LCSW-R, CHT Limitless Horizons www.limitesshorizons.org
We all want to feel comfortable in our bodies, and in our lives.
The simple act of breathing, or focused relaxation can have surprising physical and mental health benefits.
Research shows us that meditation or focused relaxation helps ward off disease by strengthening our immune systems, ... Views: 926
The traditional saying that's this week's practice has been sinking in for me lately. Thoughts have been swirling around like a sandstorm about work, things I've been reading, household tasks, finances, concerns about people, a yard that needs mowing, loose ends, projects, etc. etc. The other ... Views: 623
There’s a profound and miraculous mystery right under our noses: this instant of now has no duration at all, yet somehow it contains all the causes from the past that are creating the future. Everything arising to become this moment vanishes beneath our feet as the next moment wells up. Since ... Views: 568
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“We have the wrong perception that we are separate from the other. So, in a way, Trump is a product of a certain way of being in this world so it is very easy to have him as ... Views: 1143
FIND YOUR JOY....
Part 1 (the Edge of negativity)
Truth be told, sadness, grieve, hardship, and negativity is the order of the day.
From the very moment you wake up on a new day, to the close of the day, there is a likelihood that you would be bombarded with all forms of negativity, from ... Views: 904
“Ships don’t sink because of the water around them; ships sink because of the water that gets in them. Don’t let what’s happening around you get inside you and weigh you down.”
-Unknown
To the above quote, the self-proclaimed realist might answer “But I am not a boat and my problems aren’t ... Views: 848
Goodwill and ill will are about intention: the will is for good or ill. These intentions are expressed through action and inaction, word and deed, and-especially-thoughts. How do you feel when you sense another person taking potshots at you in her mind? What does it feel like to take potshots of ... Views: 630
Getting a divorce is one of the toughest and possibly lowest points in anyone’s life. In fact, fully getting through a divorce can even take years for some people.
With this in mind, there’s no harm in trying to make living through a divorce easier for yourself. After all, there is no way ... Views: 981
As the most social and loving species on the planet, we have the wonderful ability and inclination to connect with others, be empathic, cooperate, care, and love. On the other hand, we also have the capacity and inclination to be fearfully aggressive toward any individual or group we regard as ... Views: 563
Meditation is to the mind what aerobic exercise is to the body. Like exercise, there are many good ways to do it and you can find the one that suits you best.
Studies have shown that regular meditation promotes mindfulness (sustained observing awareness), whose benefits include decreased ... Views: 604
You may have seen the old Mickey Mouse movie in which he is working at a conveyor belt in a factory. More and more widgets come at him that he has to handle, and he gets increasingly frazzled as he struggles to keep up.
Do you ever feel the same way? Think about all the dishes, emails, ... Views: 577
The word, sacred, has two kinds of meanings. First, it can refer to something related to religion or spirituality. Second, more broadly, it can refer to something that one cherishes, that is precious, to which one is respectfully, even reverently, dedicated, such as honesty with one's life ... Views: 539
Nikola Tesla said: “If you want to find the secrets of the universe, think in terms of energy, frequency and vibration.”
In this blog in part one I talk about emotions, the energy and vibrations of emotions. I will also be talking about how emotions impact us and potentially even future ... Views: 922
As I was meditating this morning, our cat hopped up in my lap. It felt sweet to sit there with him. And yet - even though I was feeling fine and had plenty of time, there was this internal pressure to start zipping along with emails and calls and all the other clamoring minutiae of the ... Views: 536
I'm old enough to remember a time when people usually answered "good" when you asked them the standard, "How are you?" (often said "harya?"). These days the answer is commonly "busy."
In the last few months I've been very busy myself and starting to feel dispersed: juggling a dozen priorities ... Views: 560
We control our mental attitude by positive attitude not by rules.
Change your mental attitude, and the world around you will change accordingly
It is our own mental attitude which makes the world what it is for us. Our thought make things beautiful, our thoughts make things ugly. The whole ... Views: 952
Those of you who have been around here for a while and know how I roll, know that part of my life is exploring how deep the rabbit hole goes.
It’s “crazy” to tell a “normal” person that you do meditation and hypnosis a couple of hours a day because you perceive that world to be deeper than ... Views: 1000
This article was originally posted at http://www.apple-a-day-clinic.com/Health_and_Nutrition_Blog?m8:post=pessimistic-it-may-be-a-result-of-this
Most people assume their personality type is written in stone, but that may not be the case. Pessimism, a personality type is characterized by ... Views: 848
Genaral
Known as the Sage of Arunachala, Ramana Maharishi lived in Tiruvannamalai, a town in southern India. His esoteric messages can take people to higher levels of consciousness making them sense a radical departure from the habitual neurology.
The Sanskrit word Maharishi refers to a ... Views: 1108
By Margaret Paul, PhD
January 23, 2017
How fiercely and relentlessly devoted are you to wanting to love yourself and wanting to learn to treat yourself lovingly?
Gerard sat opposite me at one of my Inner Bonding Intensives.
"My body hurts and I feel irritated," he complained, in a ... Views: 776
[If for you the breath is associated with trauma and discomfort, you probably shouldn't try this practice in its form below. But you might adapt it to something that is more nurturing for you, such as a saying or image.]
Breathing brings you home. Body and mind twine together in the breath. ... Views: 597
There are popular feelings: joy, happiness, love and affection, to name a few. And then there are unpopular feelings: anger, sadness, grief, hurt, and fear, among others. Most of us tend to hide the unpopular feelings and, instead, only feel and show the popular ones.
If we want integrity and ... Views: 1010
By Margaret Paul, Ph.D.
January 16, 2017
Has giving talks or presentations been scary for you? Discover why and what to do about it.
Michael, one of my clients, asked me for help in one of our phone sessions:
"I have to give a presentation to my boss and others on our staff on Friday. ... Views: 760
The Practice.
I recently did a meditation retreat (at Spirit Rock, wonderful place, including for workshops). One evening as we walked out of the hall after the last sit, I was feeling rattled and discombobulated. (One of the benefits of a retreat - though it can be uncomfortable - is that it ... Views: 596
I have struggled with depression my entire life. Before I even knew what mental illness was, back in a time when it was the gorilla in the room that nobody talked about, I knew something was different within myself. Off. Wrong. Unlike many people suffering from depression that can pinpoint a ... Views: 1152
Negativity Not Allowed - Determined Optimism
It seems like every conversation I have had with someone lately, they have brought up the terrible state of the economy. I’ve started off many conversations with my friends this week with the sentence, “No negativity allowed.” I refuse to accept ... Views: 1319
here is a Jewish word that doesn’t translate directly into English, but it informs my attitude to people who have undergone hardship and need help.
Translated, the word is a hybrid of several concepts, not standing alone on any one, but really the combination of all.
The concepts or words ... Views: 762
Lately, I've been wondering what would be on my personal list of top five practices (all tied for first place). You might ask yourself the same question, knowing that you can cluster related practices under a single umbrella, your list may differ from mine, and your practices may change over ... Views: 600
“Don't you love a farce?
My fault, I fear
I thought that you'd want what I want
sorry, my dear
But where are the clowns?
There ought to be clowns
Quick, send in the clowns
Don't bother
They're here”
Dear One,
Happy New Year! As 2017 begins, I’ve ... Views: 1382
I'm doing a series on my personal top five practices (all tied for first place), and have so far named three: meditate (including mindfulness, self-awareness, and, if you like, prayer), take in the good, and bless (including compassion, generosity, and love).
I saw one way to bless on a ... Views: 504
One slice of the pie of life feels relaxed and contented. And then there is that other slice, in which we feel driven and stressed. Trying to get pleasures, avoid pains, pile up accomplishments and recognitions, be loved by more people. Lose more weight, try to fill the hole in the heart. Slake ... Views: 894
Control your anger or it will control you.
Control your anger as it can cloud your ability to make good decisions and find creative solutions to problems. It can negatively affect your work performance.
With insight about the real reasons for your anger and learning anger management ... Views: 1042
Feeling both the world and myself these days, one phrase keeps calling: lived by love.
Explicitly, this means coming from love in a broad sense, from compassion, good intentions, self-control, warmth, finding what's to like, caring, connecting, and kindness.
Implicitly, and more ... Views: 497
By Margaret Paul, PhD
December 19, 2016
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Do the holidays and other family events or gatherings stress you out? Discover what might be the underlying cause of this stress and what to do about it.
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"OMG, ... Views: 655
The title of this practice is a little tongue-in-cheek. What I mean is, most of us - me included - spend time worrying about criticism: past, present, and even future. Yes, try hard, keep agreements, "don't be evil," etc. But sooner or later - usually sooner - someone is going to point out the ... Views: 520
As a rock climber and a parent, I know some physical kinds of clinging are good - like to small holds or small hands!
But clinging as a psychological state has a feeling of tension in it, and drivenness, insistence, obsession, or compulsion. As experiences flow through the mind - seeing, ... Views: 618
I did my Ph.D. dissertation by videotaping 20 mother-toddler pairs and analyzing what happened when the mom offered an alternative to a problematic want ("not the chainsaw, sweetie, how about this red truck"). Hundreds of bleary eyed hours later, I found that offering alternatives reduced child ... Views: 563
Establishing a balance between body and mind is vital for the general well-being of a person. Body and mind are inextricably connected, so everything we think about, affects our body in a certain way. Just think about how many times you’ve heard people say they have a headache, and after a ... Views: 809
“Peace” can sound merely sentimental or clichéd (“visualize whirled peas”). But deep down, it’s what most of us long for. Consider the proverb: The highest happiness is peace.
Not a peace inside that ignores pain in oneself or others, or is acquired by shutting down. This is a durable peace, ... Views: 537
I'm doing a series on my personal top five practices (all tied for first place), and have so far named three: meditate (including mindfulness, self-awareness, and, if you like, prayer), take in the good, and bless (including compassion, generosity, and love).
I saw one way to bless on a ... Views: 542
As general clusters that each include a number of specific methods, my Top 5 types of practices (all tied for first place) are:
* Be mindful
* Love
* Take in the good
* Go green
* Open out
So far, I’ve written about the first four of these clusters, and you can click the links just above ... Views: 604
“In the process of letting go you will lose many things from the past, but you will find yourself.” ~ Deepak Chopra
There is no life without emotional scars; no one escapes flawless; no one can claim perfection without committing mockery upon himself. Jesus, the great example of humility for ... Views: 1217
Let go of negative thinking as it can become a habit of mind, and it can have a serious, sometimes devastating impact on all aspects of your life. It seems unfortunately that with most people, positive thinking requires some effort, whereas, negative thinking comes easily and often ... Views: 1162
I admit it: whether close to home or far away, I wish some people were different. Depending on who they are, I wish they'd stop doing things like leaving cabinet doors open in our kitchen, sending me spam emails, or turning a blind eye to global warming. And I wish they'd start doing things like ... Views: 816