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Grief and Loss Articles
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- Finding and Losing Inner Child Love: Mourning to Morning and Back Again - by Submitted on May 06, 2015 from Mark GorkinAlas, the recent break-up of a nine year relationship was painful enough. But when my ex-partner’s daughter indefinitely suspended (if not permanently ended) weekly 3-5 minute Skypeing and my periodic visiting with her 3 ½ year old daughter (i.e., my ex’s grandchild), because the mother felt ...
Views: 1 - Finding and Losing Inner Child Love: Mourning to Morning and Back Again - by Submitted on May 06, 2015 from Mark GorkinAlas, the recent break-up of a nine year relationship was painful enough. But when my ex-partner’s daughter indefinitely suspended (if not permanently ended) weekly 3-5 minute Skypeing and my periodic visiting with her 3 ½ year old daughter (i.e., my ex’s grandchild), because the mother felt ...
Views: 1498 - Finding and Losing Inner Child Love: Mourning to Morning and Back Again - by Submitted on May 06, 2015 from Mark GorkinAlas, the recent break-up of a nine year relationship was painful enough. But when my ex-partner’s daughter indefinitely suspended (if not permanently ended) weekly 3-5 minute Skypeing and my periodic visiting with her 3 ½ year old daughter (i.e., my ex’s grandchild), because the mother felt ...
Views: 1451 - Critical Incident-Trauma-Grief Intervention & Debriefing: Train the Trainer/Caregiver Workshop -- Addendum - by Submitted on May 06, 2015 from Mark GorkinIn a world where encounters with sources of aggression and violence, trauma and grief are all too common, understanding the dynamics of “critical incidents/hazardous events” – both for adults and/or children directly impacted and for those encountering second-hand effects – is vital. This ...
Views: 1428 - Individual and Collective Crisis/Trauma Intervention and Debriefing: Ten Steps & Strategies - by Submitted on May 06, 2015 from Mark GorkinIn light of events fifteen miles away (Baltimore) to 10,000 miles from my doorstop (Nepal), this essay titled, "Individual and Collective Crisis/Trauma Intervention and Debriefing: Ten Steps & Strategies," clearly has immediate relevance and application. Actually, the impetus for the article ...
Views: 1842 - 4 Secrets to Accepting Your Own Mortality with Grace - by Submitted on Apr 22, 2015 from Anica OaksAccepting your own mortality with grace and dignity can be a difficult process. Many people are left with scant little time to accept their own mortality, and you must prepare as best you can for the inevitable. This article explains four methods that allow you to find peace when you know that ...
Views: 2516 - Why Do I Feel the Way I Do? - by Submitted on Apr 08, 2015 from Janet PfeifferPeople often believe that they are slaves to their emotions: "I hate feeling like this but I can't help it." Some are ashamed of their emotions and try to hide them; still others find some to be offensive, frightening or sinful. But the truth is that all feelings have purpose and value. They are ...
Views: 1743 - Isolation: Can Trapped Grief Cause Someone To Isolate Themselves? - by Submitted on Mar 02, 2015 from Oliver JR CooperThere will be times when one will want to spend time by themselves and there will be times when they want to be around others. This is not to say that one will spend the same amount of time with others as they will by themselves; as it is not black and white. How one spends their time will ...
Views: 2208 - Dear Dr. Romance: What I fear has happened the second time round - by Submitted on Feb 14, 2015 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I hope you can help me. My boyfriend passed away two years back... We were pretty much engaged, living together and everything. I thought i was over the whole thing, but now I know I'm not. A month back, or so.. i was seeing a man, and today i found out he had ...
Views: 1228 - Being Present: Can Trapped Grief Stop Someone From Being Present? - by Submitted on Jan 31, 2015 from Oliver JR CooperIf one is into fashion, they will know that the current trend will soon change and end up being replaced by another trend. And while this could be a new trend, it could also be one that was around in the past. So upon reflection, one could say that fashion is like the weather as it is ...
Views: 1859 - Feel pain, heal and find love for the lost one - by Submitted on Feb 01, 2015 from Gordana StankovicI wanted to write this particular blog for two reasons. One is as a memory of my loving mum who died almost 6 years ago. And the second is to share my process of grieving, what I've learned from it and how it's helped my inner growth with hope that my story may also help others who are going ...
Views: 1092 - Depression: Can Trapped Grief Cause Depression? - by Submitted on Jan 09, 2015 from Oliver JR CooperWhile a physical problem can stand out, an emotional problem can remain hidden. Yet, even though there can be a difference here, it doesn’t mean that one problem is more important than other. Ultimately, it doesn’t matter what kind of pain one is experiencing, what matters is that they seek ...
Views: 1819 - Music: Can Music Trigger Grief? - by Submitted on Dec 28, 2014 from Oliver JR CooperIn some shape or form, music has been around for thousands of years and while there are styles around today that weren’t around in the past, it still has the same effect. When it comes to making music today, electrical equipment is often used and this has allowed people to create sounds that ...
Views: 1842 - The River - by Submitted on Dec 08, 2014 from Kate JarosinskaOn a recent Big Sur backpacking trip, my boyfriend and I trekked about 6 miles out to a free flowing river. We were both in desperate need for recalibration, fresh air and clean mountain water. As we rock hopped down the river bend to find the perfect camping spot, we were graced with a nice ...
Views: 1861 - The Grief Place - by Submitted on Dec 02, 2014 from Sheryl PaulThere is a room in your heart where sadness dwells. Each story of sadness lives there like a stagnant, frozen particle of light waiting for you to see it, to hold it, to wrap it in a blanket and bring it tea. When you visit your grief place with love, the particles of light start to shimmer and ...
Views: 1830(1 vote) - Robin William's, the whole trip to Oz - by Submitted on Nov 17, 2014 from Adele McDowellThe shocking news of Robin Williams’ suicide has left us all heartbroken and reeling. Robin’s death seems so antithetical to the Robin we saw brimming with life. He took on the world with his cutting-edge humor and supersonic mind. He was a trip unto himself. We would stay up late knowing ...
Views: 1332 - Loss of Light - by Submitted on Nov 12, 2014 from Sheryl PaulLight fading, time passing, big boy is ten, baby isn’t a baby and the time for having babies is over. The pregnant woman in the check-out line and it’s eleven years ago, pregnant with my own belly of hope and love, on the threshold of everything new and exciting. There was pain then, too, but ...
Views: 1464 - Coping Strategies After a Loved One's Suicide - by Submitted on Sep 15, 2014 from nancy traversIf you have experienced the loss of a loved one by suicide, you have a challenging journey ahead of you. Not only do you suffer heart wrenching grief from your loss, but also from the fact that she chose to take her own life. You may wonder if you could have done something to prevent it. You may ...
Views: 1530 - When a Loved One Commits Suicide - by Submitted on Sep 15, 2014 from nancy traversRobin Williams’ recent death left many of us, who didn’t even know him, feeling bereft. How could he, who was loved by millions, take his own life? How could his life have been so unbearable that he had to end it? And how do we cope with the aftermath? About 40,000 people in the U.S. commit ...
Views: 1511 - How Shall We Grieve in Tumultuous Times? - by Submitted on Aug 18, 2014 from Maria HoaglundWe live in a culture where expressing grief is not honored in meaningful ways. We live in a society that’s awkward around the subject of death & dying, as well as grief. We have “bereavement leaves” in the workplace that last for three or four days. We use words like you need to “get over it,” ...
Views: 1260 - When Life Simply Happens - by Submitted on Jul 11, 2014 from Kim Kirmmse TothNone of us goes through life without any grief or loss. And it can stop us in our tracks when it does happen. And death is a part of the Circle of Life, so why is it so hard? For me, even though my husband had been so very sick for so many years, it still comes almost as a shock. While he was ...
Views: 1207 - Humor Boosts the Sick and Weary - by Submitted on Jul 07, 2014 from Allidah Hicks Bonnie KnutiEveryone loves a good laugh, especially those who are going through tough times. Laughter gives a momentary break from the crisis at hand and the anxiety it brings. A touch of humor reminds us that the patient and the family are not defined by the illness, and that those who are sad and grieving ...
Views: 1518 - Can You Keep a Secret? Maintaining Patient Privacy - by Submitted on Jun 19, 2014 from Allidah Hicks Bonnie KnutiYou visit your sick co-worker in the hospital or at home and he looks terrible. He's not sounding like himself and he's sharing way too much personal information. Then, you happen to see a pamphlet on the nightstand about a scary illness that you were not aware that he has. To top it off, some ...
Views: 1544 - Biographies of Gold Star Mothers - by Submitted on May 14, 2014 from Abigail FazelatAccording to a website called Army.mil, ever since WWI, mothers of fallen soldiers have dubbed themselves as “Gold Star Mothers”. The name derived from the Gold Star, a symbol in the military known for “loss and sacrifice”. Ever since 1936, September 29th has officially been recognized by the ...
Views: 1532 - Mothers in the Military - by Submitted on May 14, 2014 from Abigail FazelatMothers are normally military minorities. Sure, women in general are gaining more recognition in the military, but surely many people forget that a large majority of these women are mothers as well as national heroes. However, balancing these two identities is hardly ever easy. One military ...
Views: 1633 - Hold the Sky: What You Can Do About Personal Grief - by Submitted on May 14, 2014 from Frosty WooldridgeBy Frosty Wooldridge During your journey on Earth, you face incredible moments of joy, challenge and discomfort. You never know where those “moments” may originate or for how long. In your life, you may face an accident, loss of a loved one, disintegration of a friendship or disease. A ...
Views: 1207(1 vote) - Not Forgotten – Remembering Folks Long After a Trauma or Death - by Submitted on Apr 28, 2014 from Allidah Hicks Bonnie KnutiWhether it’s the anniversary of a public event like the Boston Marathon bombings or the Columbine shootings, or a not-so-public anniversary of a friend or neighbor’s tragedy, it’s important to reach out and show that you have not forgotten. Many folks will jump in to help right away and that is ...
Views: 1761 - Memorial Stories and Poems - "In Remembrance of Private Cornelius Peter Buhler, my Uncle who Gave it All" - by Submitted on Apr 11, 2014 from Ken MatthiesI’m speaking to you today… IN REMEMBRANCE OF a man known as Private Cornelius Peter Buhler – or – (Buller)… a member of the Calgary Highlanders Regiment who was killed in action July 25, 1944 during the Allied combat offensive in France. Cornelius Buller was my uncle. As a member of his ...
Views: 1326 - Memorial Stories and Poems - "A Sister's Farewell" - by Submitted on Apr 11, 2014 from Ken MatthiesA SISTER’S FAREWELL (When Last We Said Goodbye) “You hugged and held me close, and then looked deeply into my face. I remember that look in your eyes, Sis…” I finally fell asleep last night With that image before my face, The depth of the look you gave me then Eclipsed all of Man as a ...
Views: 2205 - Memorial Stories and Poems - "At the Crossroads of Life and Death" - by Submitted on Apr 11, 2014 from Ken MatthiesFor my Aunt Helen Jantzen, at your Crossroads of Life and Death You Have ....... You have walked life’s road, lo, these many years together in body and heart; You have shared the dreams, the joys and the tears of two lives that now must part. You have been called to that test we ...
Views: 1386 - Memorial Stories and Poems - "Leading Aircraftman John Matthies" - by Submitted on Apr 11, 2014 from Ken MatthiesFor those of you who don’t know me, my name is Ken Matthies, retired Canadian Forces Northern Ranger. I’m also John’s youngest brother, come down from the Yukon Territory to love, honor and pay tribute to him in my own special way at his passing. I have a story about John to share with you ...
Views: 1332 - Introduction to the Poetic Series "Grieving the Death of a Grown Child" - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2014 from Ken Matthies“HeartSpun Talk from the Crucible of Experience”© From the life of Ken Matthies - Author, Poet, Real Life Storyteller Every single death that occurs brings loss, grief and bereavement to someone who loved or cared for that individual, and its significance never can or should be discounted ...
Views: 1172 - A Poetic Series - Grieving the Death of a Grown Child - "A Father's Hope" - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2014 from Ken Matthies“HeartSpun Talk from the Crucible of Experience”© From the life of Ken Matthies - Author, Poet, Real Life Storyteller Written a month and a half after my daughter died, the poem you'll read below was a last ditch effort to hang onto my spiritual faith before I descended in a deep spiral ...
Views: 1088 - A Poetic Series - Grieving the Death of a Grown Child - "Reality" (A Daughter's Death) - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2014 from Ken Matthies“HeartSpun Talk from the Crucible of Experience”© From the life of Ken Matthies - Author, Poet, Real Life Storyteller This was a poem written in trembling anticipation of the second anniversary of her death due to arrive in its full force and fury the following day – a harsh truth about ...
Views: 1129 - A Poetic Series - Grieving the Death of a Grown Child - "Anniversary Memories" - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2014 from Ken Matthies“HeartSpun Talk from the Crucible of Experience”© From the life of Ken Matthies - Author, Poet, Real Life Storyteller This was a poem written in still dreaded anticipation of the third anniversary of her death due to arrive once again on the following day. It would in fact turn out to be a ...
Views: 1179 - A Poetic Series - Grieving the Death of a Grown Child - "I Choose It Now" - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2014 from Ken Matthies“HeartSpun Talk from the Crucible of Experience”© From the life of Ken Matthies - Author, Poet, Real Life Storyteller This was my poem of decision – written in the realization that it was finally time for the ‘rubber to hit the road’ of my future life in a meaningful way despite the fact ...
Views: 1147 - Stories of the Grieving Process After a Child Dies - “How Memorial Symbols Can Help You Heal from Grief” - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2014 from Ken Matthies“HeartSpun Talk from the Crucible of Experience”© From the life of Ken Matthies - Author, Poet, Real Life Storyteller In the early days of grief amid the numbness and shock of loss the thought of memorial symbols is not yet a part of your grieving or healing process. But there comes a ...
Views: 1125 - Stories of the Grieving Process After a Child Dies - “Anniversary Day Tremors of Change” - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2014 from Ken Matthies“HeartSpun Talk from the Crucible of Experience”© From the life of Ken Matthies - Author, Poet, Real Life Storyteller One thing that seems certain about healing from grief as time passes is that it’s a process of change for those of us living in it. How the earthquakes of pain we feel in ...
Views: 1137 - Stories of the Grieving Process After a Child Dies - “Finding a Grief Buddy” (and the Tail Rotor of a Bell 206 Helicopter) - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2014 from Ken Matthies“HeartSpun Talk from the Crucible of Experience”© From the life of Ken Matthies - Author, Poet, Real Life Storyteller I’ll understand if you’re wondering what a grief buddy* could possibly have to do with the tail rotor of a Bell 206 helicopter…or what lesson of healing value could be ...
Views: 1033 - Stories of the Grieving Process After a Child Dies - “A Mother’s Gratitude” - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2014 from Ken Matthies“HeartSpun Talk from the Crucible of Experience”© From the life of Ken Matthies - Author, Poet, Real Life Storyteller ‘A Mother’s Gratitude’ tells you a brief story of the grieving process from a mother’s perspective – and serves as an example of acceptance and hope for all of you readers ...
Views: 1220 - Stories of the Grieving Process After a Child Dies - “Out of the Mouths of Babes” - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2014 from Ken Matthies“HeartSpun Talk from the Crucible of Experience”© From the life of Ken Matthies - Author, Poet, Real Life Storyteller My granddaughter turned ten years old the other day, and it was as I was calling her to wish her happy birthday that I realized she was already twice as old as the day her ...
Views: 1055 - Stories of the Grieving Process After a Child Dies - “Keeping the Vision Alive in your Heart and Mind” - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2014 from Ken Matthies“HeartSpun Talk from the Crucible of Experience”© From the life of Ken Matthies - Author, Poet, Real Life Storyteller What are you doing to keep the vision alive in your own heart and mind of the loved one you lost? Finding a way to do so is a vitally important part of dealing with your ...
Views: 1018 - Stories of the Grieving Process After a Child Dies - “Go Rest High on that Mountain” - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2014 from Ken Matthies“HeartSpun Talk from the Crucible of Experience”© From the life of Ken Matthies - Author, Poet, Real Life Storyteller When I walked into the funeral parlor prior to my daughter’s funeral for a private family viewing time, the powerful music and words of Vince Gill’s song “Go Rest High on ...
Views: 1178 - Stories of the Grieving Process After a Child Dies - “Road Construction Next ___ Kilometers” - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2014 from Ken Matthies“HeartSpun Talk from the Crucible of Experience”© From the life of Ken Matthies - Author, Poet, Real Life Storyteller You’ve probably seen this sort of example a thousand times before in your life and never had cause to think twice about it on any of those occasions. Returning home one ...
Views: 1036 - The Marker Stones of Grief – How Long Should it Last? - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2014 from Ken Matthies“HeartSpun Talk from the Crucible of Experience”© From the life of Ken Matthies - Author, Poet, Real Life Storyteller Every single person experiencing the pain of grief would like to know that there’s a hard and fast rule that can tell you when you can expect the pain to go away so your ...
Views: 1085 - Marker Stones Part I - Avoidance - ‘Walking the Edges’ - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2014 from Ken Matthies“HeartSpun Talk from the Crucible of Experience”© From the life of Ken Matthies - Author, Poet, Real Life Storyteller Every single journey of loss, grief and bereavement is individual and different for each person experiencing it. There can be no hard and fast rules saying that it’s the ...
Views: 1042 - Marker Stones Part II - Confrontation - ‘Entering the Depths’ - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2014 from Ken Matthies“HeartSpun Talk from the Crucible of Experience”© From the life of Ken Matthies - Author, Poet, Real Life Storyteller It’s in this second of the grief cycles that the waters of emotion get deeper and run heavy with the hidden currents of your pain – but again there are marker stones within ...
Views: 1037 - Marker Stones Part III - Integration - ‘Mending the Heart’ - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2014 from Ken Matthies“HeartSpun Talk from the Crucible of Experience”© From the life of Ken Matthies - Author, Poet, Real Life Storyteller The third cycle of grief is where the good news of your healing journey finally begins to outweigh the bad news and feelings from your experience of loss, grief and ...
Views: 1074 - Now That You Know About the Marker Stones, What’s Helping You Heal Today? - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2014 from Ken Matthies“HeartSpun Talk from the Crucible of Experience”© From the life of Ken Matthies - Author, Poet, Real Life Storyteller The journey of your healing from loss, grief and bereavement will continue for you through a lifetime of learning – and from my own experience of having gone through it ...
Views: 1073 - Grieving Advice Tips - “The Importance of Listening to those in Grief” - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2014 from Ken Matthies“HeartSpun Talk from the Crucible of Experience”© From the life of Ken Matthies - Author, Poet, Real Life Storyteller On a recent visit to the beauty of Southeast Alaska I was privileged to encounter an Elder of the Tlingit peoples who live there. He had recently lost his wife after many ...
Views: 1169