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How Core Beliefs Run Your Life - For Good or BadFoolproof Ways to Use Assertiveness to Request a RaiseTips for Using Social Media in a Healthy Manner- "I Am The Centre Of The Universe!” - by Submitted on Jun 15, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperWhen I was out walking the other day, I was thinking about what can happen in someone’s adult years if they were violated and made to feel insignificant during their early years. What came to mind first was the kind of person who acts as though they are the centre of the universe. Through ...
Views: 1144 - "I Survived About 10 Different Xmas Singing Events With The Chorus WITH NO IMPACT ON MY VOICE!" - by Submitted on Jan 06, 2020 from Diana YampolskyThis is an informative & educational story about Mary Ellen Stoll: Former Speech and Singing Voice Repair Client from Brockville, Ontario – Now an active member of the Brockville Barbershop Chorus (Thousand Islanders Chorus). ______________ "Hi Diana, I just wanted to let you know I survived ...
Views: 896 - "I Was Full Of Self-Doubt" - by Submitted on Jan 24, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperBefore I started writing articles, I had been on the path for around seven years. During this time, I had put a lot of effort into trying to understand myself and why my life was the way it was. So, when I started writing, it wasn’t as though I just woke up one day and thought that I would ...
Views: 1310 - "If I'm not accepted, I'm not okay" - by Submitted on Sep 04, 2005 from David LongoGive yourself the most powerful coffee breakyou ever had. Find the GOLD within this message... "If I'm not accepted, I'm not okay." Has that ever been your motto? Be honest with yourself, now.Don't you secretly think this? Sure, you might have that "inner wall" of resistance to a statement ...
Views: 1466 - "Self Pity" by Linda Lipshutz, MS, LCSW - by Submitted on Aug 09, 2011 from linda lipshutzLois tried to think of a plausible excuse to beg out of lunch with the other teachers. They were a great group of women and there was a time not long ago when she really looked forward to being with them. But, now it seemed too much to bear. Yesterday, Lois lost her patience as Marge droned ...
Views: 1545 - "She Had A Big Impact On My Life!" - by Submitted on Oct 12, 2017 from Oliver JR CooperThere was a moment in the beginning of 2013, when I didn’t know why something was taking place. I had been in relationship for a few months and I didn’t completely understand why the woman I was with was behaving in a certain way. I had the need to find out about what might be going on, ...
Views: 1321 - "THE BEAUTY IDEAL" - Is the media destroying our self-esteem? - by Submitted on Aug 27, 2015 from Jess O'BrienWhat comes into your head when you hear the word "beauty"? Hold your thoughts, feelings and images and let me try something. From here on in, do me a favour and FORGET EVERYTHING that you currently know or have been taught about beauty. FORGET that you should be a certain size. Forget that you ...
Views: 1316 - "The" Key to Life - by Submitted on Jan 19, 2009 from Keith BrayIn a search to get a life I wanted, I began a journey. There were a number of things out of whack when the journey started. My wife had moved to an apartment leaving me in the home with our late teen kids, the kids kept their distance, the dog kept his also, my company was under performing, ...
Views: 733 - "This Guy Is An Expert At What He Does!" - by Submitted on Jan 31, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperTowards the end of last year, I was introduced to someone called Collin Smith, who is also known as ‘The Listener’. Now, this not merely a fancy term that he uses; it relates to what he is actually like. He is one of the best listeners I have come across, and I don’t say this lightly. ...
Views: 1383 - "You Have To Kill Your Inner Parents!" - by Submitted on Apr 12, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperAt the end of 2016, I could see that I needed to work on my boundaries and to feel better about myself. When it came to the former, this wasn’t just about me saying no; it was also about me listening to my own needs and no longer trying to please others. As for the latter, I could see that ...
Views: 1251 - #WTF is FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) Really? - by Submitted on Nov 17, 2013 from Gemini AdamsThis acronym has recently made news headlines and is increasingly gracing the landing pages of popular psychology and health sites. It’s continually bandied about on daytime TV and teens seem to Tweet it more often than the @ sign. But what does FOMO really mean? I don’t mean literally. ...
Views: 1996 - *** Can Beliefs Keep You From Becoming Wealthy? - by Submitted on Nov 25, 2009 from Morty LefkoeA few months ago I asked people on our mailing list which beliefs they thought were keeping them from becoming wealthy. The top five were: · You have to work hard to make money. · I’m not deserving. · I’ll never have enough money. /There is never enough money. · Money is a ...
Views: 2728 - *** Get Into an Altered State of Consciousness in Minutes - by Submitted on Nov 25, 2009 from Morty LefkoeTo experience a shift in one’s identity from “self” (one’s body, beliefs, thoughts, feelings, and behavior) to “SELF” (as consciousness, as a spiritual being) typically requires years of meditation. Some workshops claim to be able to provide that experience in several concentrated days. The ...
Views: 1765 - *** How to Create New Possibilities in Your Life - by Submitted on Nov 25, 2009 from Morty LefkoeSome people are convinced we create our own reality by focusing on what we desire with strong emotion. Others are just as convinced that that idea is New Age nonsense. But regardless of which position is valid, it is unquestionably true that we literally create new possibilities in our lives—a ...
Views: 2485 - *** How to Live a Magical Life - by Submitted on Aug 25, 2013 from Valery SatterwhitePeople often ask me how I live such a magical life. It's easy. I believe in magic. HA! The song "Do You Believe in Magic" by the The Lovin' Spoonful just ran through my head. But I digress - or do I? Actually that flash of music just proved my point. What you believe in is brought unto ...
Views: 1708 - *** Speaking Your Truth Without Blame or Judgment - by Submitted on Mar 16, 2009 from Margaret PaulHow often have you become irritated or angry, given yourself up, started to argue or debate, teach or explain, or withdrew when someone was treating you badly - ordering you around, judging you, blaming you, or dumping their complaints or negativity on you? How often have you behaved in any of ...
Views: 4055 - *** The Courage of Randy Pausch - by Submitted on Mar 19, 2008 from Alexander GreenCourage means different things to different people. Hemingway called it "grace under pressure." The writer Anais Nin said that, "Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage." Winston Churchill called it the greatest virtue "and the guarantor of all the others." There are different ...
Views: 3213 - *** The Only Scientifically-Proven Method of Eliminating the Fear of Public Speaking Permanently - by Submitted on Nov 25, 2009 from Morty LefkoeIn May 2006 the journal Clinical Psychology and Psychotherapy published a research study that proves there is a way to permanently eliminate the fear of public speaking. This research paper described how 36 people who had a fear of public speaking were divided into two groups to test the ...
Views: 4433 - *** Why Successful Actors Self-Sabotage - by Submitted on Aug 25, 2013 from Valery SatterwhiteI opened up Sunday's Parade Magazine and read an article about "The Mixed-Up Life of Shia LaBeouf" written by Dotson Rader. Shia is a 23-year old wildly successful actor who's latest film is "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen". I saw the irony in the title of the article and the title of the ...
Views: 1345 - ***Are Men With Deeper Voices More Attractive? - by Submitted on May 06, 2011 from Nancy DanielsThere is no doubt that women judge a man’s attractiveness by more than just his looks. Two qualities that the female sex takes note of are a man’s confidence and his voice. A deep, rich sound is definitely more alluring to her ears than a high-pitched, nasal whine or a weak and wimpy squawk. ...
Views: 6051 - ***Are You A Negativity Seeker? - by Submitted on Jul 23, 2020 from Judi MoreoRecently, I was sitting next to a woman at a meeting who turned to me and said, “Do you know any good gossip about any of these people here? I just love to hear the dirt on everyone.” Wow! What a way to go through life…looking for negativity and what she could find wrong with others and their ...
Views: 1291 - ***Are You a Whisperer? - by Submitted on Apr 20, 2009 from Nancy DanielsAre you one who often reverts to whispering or speaks consistently in a soft voice instead of a normal volume of sound? I am not talking about the horse whisperer or the dog whisperer in this particular case, but the individual who speaks in a whisper even when his/her throat is not sore or ...
Views: 2746 - ***Are you plagued with feeling anxiety or anger much of the time? - by Submitted on Jun 15, 2009 from Morty LefkoeWould you like to get rid of the anxiety or anger you feel much of the time? Because many emotions are caused by beliefs, getting rid of the beliefs can frequently eradicate negative emotions. For example, the belief that “Dogs are dangerous” will result in an emotion of fear when ...
Views: 997 - ***Are You Starved For Attention? - by Submitted on Jul 30, 2020 from Judi MoreoMost people enjoy people showing an interest in them. I know I do. But, there are some people who just have to be the center of attention. They talk incessantly about themselves, their accomplishments, what they own, who they know, where they have been, and even, the illnesses they have ...
Views: 1378 - ***Are You Sure You Can't Eliminate Fundamental Beliefs Quickly and Permanently? - by Submitted on Apr 30, 2009 from Morty LefkoeAlthough most people think that behavior change usually is difficult and does not happen overnight, I disagree. About 24 years ago I developed the first in a series of interventions that literally do produce rapid and permanent change. The primary one, the Lefkoe Belief ProcessTM (LBP), ...
Views: 901 - ***Are you the little bird? - by Submitted on Jun 17, 2017 from Steve ScottIn my book, “Wings to Fly” I tell a shortened version of the following story. The story revolves around how we can set ourselves up for harm and failure without realizing that we are doing it. When we do, the consequences can be disastrous. Here’s the story. The owl and his friend, the little ...
Views: 1380 - ***Are You Trying to Be Perfect? - by Submitted on Aug 13, 2020 from Judi MoreoAre you a person who needs things to be perfect? Do you try to have a perfectly clean house, perfectly spotless car, perfect kids, perfect spouse, perfect hair style, perfect wardrobe? Does absolutely everything of yours need to be perfect? If so, you are not only putting a lot of pressure ...
Views: 1369 - ***Benefits Of Working With A Coach - by Submitted on Jun 13, 2017 from Steve ScottCoaching is proven to work when two factors are present: The client is willing to learn, grow, and take action There is a gap between where he is now and where he wants to be. That`s all is necessary for a successful coaching relationship where you can develop the right strategy, ...
Views: 908 - ***Confidence - by Submitted on Jul 02, 2020 from Judi MoreoWhy is it that having confidence in ourselves and our abilities is so hard? Why do so many of us have the tendency to overestimate others and underestimate ourselves? And, why are we so concerned about what other people think about us? I believe if we are ever going to be able to answer ...
Views: 1354 - ***Designing a Future Marked by High Self-Esteem - by Submitted on Oct 04, 2007 from Dr. Joe RubinoStudies show that more than 85% of the world’s population suffers from some degree of diminished self-worth. For most people who lack a positive self-image, the future looks like a mere extension of their troubled past. Their expectation of what is to be is consistent with what has been — with a ...
Views: 980 - ***Do You Have the Habit of “Anchoring?” - by Submitted on Aug 27, 2020 from Judi MoreoMy dad was a successful salesman. He carried a little spiral notebook with his appointments, notes to himself, important names and numbers. One day, he dropped the notebook on the floor and when it fell open, I saw it had gold stars pasted on most of the pages. I asked him why a grown man ...
Views: 1435 - ***Do you know your position? - by Submitted on Jun 21, 2017 from Steve ScottKnow your position for a more rewarding life. It is discouraging to have talents and not to have them recognized or used. In “Wings To Fly” your daily lift off to soar to greater heights I explore how to position yourself for greater success and happiness. Too often, we think we know our ...
Views: 1411 - ***Do You Sometimes Feel Depressed? - by Submitted on Aug 06, 2020 from Judi MoreoLet's face it! Life is not always easy, and for some of us, depression very often takes over, We get depressed when we are discouraged or disappointed in ourselves or our lives. We start to feel as though we can’t live up to the expectations of others….or even our own expectations. We feel ...
Views: 1679 - ***Don’t ever give up hope - by Submitted on Feb 24, 2012 from Morty LefkoeFor most of my life I didn’t want to be me. In fact, I was so unhappy being me that I wanted to be someone else. When I was in my twenties I wanted to be Fred Astaire, because I liked the light and joyful sense of life he projected when dancing on screen. Later in life I didn’t care who else ...
Views: 2048 - ***Eliminate Your Passive Language - Tag Questions and Qualifiers - by Submitted on Sep 27, 2020 from Vivian HartePassive people give away their passivity with the type of language they use. Their words tell others that they don’t think very highly of themselves and that they need others’ approval. This type of language takes away their power. De-emphasizers are methods of using speech so that passive ...
Views: 7005 - ***Get Rid of Negative Senses and Expectations: TLM Part 2 - by Submitted on Mar 02, 2012 from Morty LefkoeLast week I pointed out that The Lefkoe Method (TLM) includes nine different processes, all of them unique methods for transforming the quality of your life. I described two of them—the Lefkoe Belief Process and the Lefkoe Stimulus Process—in detail. (See ...
Views: 1923 - ***Getting Rid of Beliefs is Not Enough - by Submitted on Dec 14, 2010 from Morty LefkoeBecause many emotions are caused by beliefs, getting rid of the relevant beliefs can frequently eradicate negative emotions. For example, the belief that “Dogs are dangerous” will result in an emotion of fear when confronting a dog. The belief “People can't be trusted” will result in a feeling ...
Views: 2195 - ***Have You Ever Thought to Yourself …What Was I Thinking? - by Submitted on Mar 30, 2017 from Judi MoreoHave You Ever Thought to Yourself …What Was I Thinking? Have you ever done something that was totally out of character for you, but you did it and later wondered if you had actually been in your right mind at the time when you did it? Well, that’s what I did. It was New Year’s Eve. My friend ...
Views: 1838 - ***How Can I Use The Lefkoe Method? Part 1 - by Submitted on Feb 24, 2012 from Morty LefkoeMany of you have used the Lefkoe Belief Process and found that permanently getting rid of beliefs has made a profound difference in your life. Did you know that The Lefkoe Method includes eight other processes you can use to make significant changes in your life? Depending on the problem you ...
Views: 3201 - ***How Core Beliefs Run Your Life - For Good or Bad - by Submitted on Sep 27, 2020 from Vivian HarteMost people begin their journey into low self-confidence in their childhood. Our early environments affect us deeply, and we take in the messages we receive. As we hear these same messages over and over again, they take shape in our minds, and over time they form our core beliefs about ...
Views: 6992 - ***How do beliefs produce “driven,” compulsive behavior? - by Submitted on Jun 15, 2009 from Morty LefkoeWhy are so many of us “driven” compulsively to seek or do things that frequently aren’t in our own best self-interest? You probably aren’t surprised that my answer is: beliefs. But there is a specific type of belief that results in “driven” behavior. And it is formed in a very specific way. ...
Views: 811 - ***How I Changed My Life By Eliminating One Belief And How You Can Too - by Submitted on Mar 18, 2009 from Morty LefkoeBack in 1984 my life was not going very well at all. I was a management consultant with very few clients. I was on my third marriage and we were arguing a lot. I had a two-year old baby girl and money was really scarce. Right after New Year’s Day in 1985 I was on a plane from New York to ...
Views: 693 - ***How Our Language Determines Our Reality - by Submitted on Sep 16, 2011 from Morty LefkoeIn another post on this site I explained how we live in a dualistic universe in which for any “thing” or concept to exist, we must distinguish between it and a not-that-thing or concept. Our most important tool for making distinctions and creating our reality is language. As Edward Sapir, a ...
Views: 1905 - ***How to be more effective at work: TLM Part 4 - by Submitted on Mar 09, 2012 from Morty LefkoeIn addition to the seven processes that can help free individuals from their limitations (which I’ve described in three other blog posts), The Lefkoe Method has two additional processes that were designed specifically for use in organizations. If you use them in your own firm, you will be ...
Views: 1925 - ***How to eliminate suffering and get enlightened - by Submitted on Sep 28, 2011 from Morty LefkoeThere are two fundamentally different ways in which we can experience ourselves. First, the way most of us usually experience ourselves: as a creation—a separate entity distinct from other entities, whose survival is always at stake. Some people call this the ego. Second, as the creator ...
Views: 1829 - ***How to stop being a victim? - by Submitted on Sep 08, 2011 from Morty LefkoeWe all know people who are “victims”—people who view their lives through the filter: “It’s not my fault. They (or it) did it to me.” When you understand what the feeling of victimization really is, where it comes from, and how it affects people, you will discover it is even more widespread and ...
Views: 2761 - ***How to stop being a victim? - by Submitted on Sep 16, 2011 from Morty LefkoeWe all know people who are “victims”—people who view their lives through the filter: “It’s not my fault. They (or it) did it to me.” When you understand what the feeling of victimization really is, where it comes from, and how it affects people, you will discover it is even more widespread and ...
Views: 1589 - ***I Finally Stopped Bragging - by Submitted on Dec 14, 2010 from Morty LefkoeIt took me a long time to stop bragging. About 50 years in fact. As a child I always bragged about things that I thought would impress others. How good my grades were. Things I had done. Popular kids I hung out with. Having people think well of me was so important that I even lied just ...
Views: 3242 - ***It Is Possible To Get Rid of Your Stress - by Submitted on Apr 30, 2009 from Morty Lefkoe"Yeah, sure," you might say. "And how exactly am I supposed to get rid of all the stressful things in my life?" Here’s how I answered that question for myself. I was filled with anxiety for most of my life. I worried about what people thought of me, I was worried about not having enough ...
Views: 751 - ***Leave the past in the past - by Submitted on Jun 15, 2009 from Morty LefkoeMany psychotherapists tell us that our current difficulties are a direct result of our childhoods. As a result many people “blame” their parents for any upsets or suffering they experience as adults. When you eliminate a belief using the Lefkoe Belief Process it becomes quite clear that ...
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