Mention the word “Masturbation” and what do you think of? While masturbation means different things to different people, it is one of the most misunderstood subjects in the world, as it is enshrined in mystery and secrecy because of the simple reason we speak so little about it. Masturbation may ... Views: 6549
The length or girth of a penis is not the measure of a man. Penis pumps, pills, and patches can only make your penis bigger temporarily. They all work on the same principle of increasing blood flow in order to get a thicker penis. I would be wary of any body alternating devices and invariably ... Views: 5310
I am surprised that, in this day and age, I still am asked: “What can women do in bed besides lying back and thinking of England?”
In case you are not familiar with this expression, it is an English saying with roughly the same meaning as “to grit one’s teeth”, i.e. to put up with what is ... Views: 4227
The ear is one of the erogenous centres of a woman’s body. Since ears are very sensitive, touching, kissing, sucking and even gently biting her earlobes, can send her into a sexual tizzy.
Turn up the temperature by touching her ear with your fingers and tongue, followed by small, slow ... Views: 4202
Red Hot Touch: A Head-to-Toe Handbook for Mind-Blowing Orgasms by Jaiya and Jon Hanauer
Red Hot Touch is sizzling hot! It is possibly the modern-day equivalent of The Joy of Sex. The writing is fresh and playful; the content is incredibly useful and informative; and the techniques are ... Views: 3483
This article first appeared on Good Vibrations Magazine.
If you have been following my blog here, you may recall a previous post where I mentioned looking forward to watching an 83-minute feature film/documentary called Cowboys in Paradise.
This is a controversial work because this is the ... Views: 3315
We hear it said constantly: “He’s hot!” or “She’s sexy!” What exactly does ‘sexy’ mean?
Merriam-Webster’s Online Dictionary defines ‘sexy’ as sexually suggestive or stimulating. In other words, sexy can be ‘erotic’. Another synonym is ‘appealing’; as in generally attractive or ... Views: 3065
Have you heard of pelvic floor exercises? You may have learnt about them from your aerobics instructor. Or perhaps your urologist was the one who ordered you to squeeze your butt cheeks together? Maybe your gynae was the one who asked you to attempt to tighten your vagina, or was it your ... Views: 2994
A few weeks ago, while watching ‘Robin Hood’ starring Russell Crowe, I found myself cringing at the predictability of the plot. I am usually not so squeamish about my buttons being so obviously pushed. However, I walked away from the experience with a few observations about the preparation of ... Views: 2937
Some sexually transmitted infections can be passed on orally, so it’s a good idea to put on a condom for oral sex. Flavoured condoms would be the same strength as well as gone through the same rigorous testing as the normal condoms so you shouldn’t worry about it at all. There is a chance of the ... Views: 2854
His Needs, Her Needs: Building an Affair-Proof Marriage – Fifteenth Anniversary Edition (2001) by Willard F. Harley, Jr.
Most of us are probably familiar with ‘The Five Languages of Love’ by Gary Chapman. These “Five Love Languages” have been useful in helping people speak and understand ... Views: 2730
In a previous piece, I talked about the role of open- and closed-ended questions to get feedback from our partner after a sexual experience.
You might begin asking for sexual feedback by using a few open-ended questions. If your partner is not forthcoming, or you wish to get clearer answers, ... Views: 2583
I first learnt about the ‘Facebook Bra Color Campaign’ through the blog post by sex-positive activist Carlin Ross who works alongside the legendary Betty Dodson.
The campaign, believed to be started by women in Detroit, Michigan, who are trying to raise awareness of Breast Cancer, asked women ... Views: 2542
Recently a girlfriend admitted that until she met me, she had always thought that vaginismus was a myth – a disease that was made up, or had been eradicated in the ’80s, and most definitely did not exist in modern day.
In fact, vaginismus is a very real sexual concern that women experience, ... Views: 2505
The Erotic Mind: Unlock the Inner Sources of Sexual Passion and Fulfillment by Jack Morin
In this intriguing, insightful mix of analysis, anecdote and advice, San Francisco psychotherapist Morin developed an ‘erotic equation’ by drawing on the discussions of 351 respondents, straight and gay. ... Views: 2463
In previous pieces*, I have covered how sex is not a one-way experience (in ‘Don’t Lie Back and Think of England’), as well as how sex can be like an elephant in the bedroom when it comes to communicating any problems that might be occurring. This week, I would like to suggest ways in which we ... Views: 2449
I didn’t know I had a vulva until I went to sex school.
Don’t get me wrong. Of course, I do have a vulva (pronounced as ‘vuhl-vah’) and a vagina (pronounced ‘vha-gine-a’). I just didn’t know what they were called. I couldn’t even pronounce the word penis (pronounced as ‘pee-nis’) for that ... Views: 2403
Is sex a job or a joy to you? Sex means many things to different people, often depending on where they are emotionally, or even the time of their life. For some, it is a chore, a duty, an obligation, simply a way to keep the harmony in a relationship. For others, it may be a way to ensure food ... Views: 2393
The Joy of Sex: A Gourmet Guide to Love Making by Alex Comfort
This original The Joy of Sex, first published in 1972, has often been credited with inventing the modern sex manual and enjoyed unprecedented success world-wide gracing 8 million homes. Illustrated with line-drawings and ... Views: 2344
I am a sexologist. Since I am the only one with this unique combination of qualification and training in Singapore, there exists a lot of confusion about what exactly a sexologist does within our little city/state. Not only that, I have my share of detractors who think I am a ‘joke’, only about ... Views: 2312
For most people, sex is a sensitive and difficult subject to talk about.
I have come across a man who, after 15 years of marriage, admitted that he and his wife have never talked about sex. Don’t get me wrong. They do have sex. They just don’t talk about it.
In other words, they never ... Views: 2192
I was drawn to the book Sitting Moon: A Guide to Natural Rejuvenation After Pregnancy at the library. It has in part to do with the professional-looking cover with a white background, as well as the sub-title: ‘Natural Rejuvenation’. Natural is always good, I thought. Another factor probably ... Views: 2190
Why is sex like learning to ride a bicycle? Well, do you know how to ride a bicycle? Not the four-wheeled type. The two-wheel ones (one front, one back) upon which the rider needs to be balanced.
If yes, how long did it take you to learn to ride one? While you were learning how to ride the ... Views: 2130
For most men, their earliest sexual experiences are with masturbation done secretly and quickly, for fear of being found out. Hence it is often believed that such early experience actually condition some men’s sexual response to a pattern of rapid ejaculation. In reality, masturbation is one of ... Views: 2079
The definitive DSM-IV-TR, which is the latest version of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders published by the American Psychiatric Association, does not recognize sexual addiction as a diagnosis. Conventional wisdom among therapists has long been that there is no such thing ... Views: 2021
Women Who Love Sex: Ordinary Women Describe Their Paths to Pleasure, Intimacy, and Ecstasy, by Gina Ogden
Once I started reading the book, I did not want to put it down. It is beautifully and succinctly written by a woman who has had to deal with her own inner ‘ghosts’ and discomforts with ... Views: 2009
Does male circumcision make sex more pleasurable for both the guy and the girl?
The extra lubricating functions a foreskin provides are not present in men without a foreskin. However this can be remedied with the addition of a lubricant. If anything, the men I have encountered who underwent ... Views: 1952
We set resolutions, goals and targets for all manner of things, from our career and our finances to our love life; so why not for our sexual lives?
Your face might be wearing a bemused expression after seeing the above title. But, let’s pause and think about it. We set resolutions, goals and ... Views: 1922
This piece first appeared on the Good Vibrations Magazine.
The trailer of the new Singaporean film ‘When Hainan Meets Teochew’ was enough to persuade me that I had to watch it. The movie was premised as a romantic comedy between a ‘manly’ woman, and a ‘womanly’ man, as opposed to the usual ... Views: 1823
1. For a quickie
You have a few minutes and you want it hot, quick and sexy! Try Wall Standing Sex where both partners are standing doing penetration. The female uses a wall to support herself while being penetrated. Tip: Bend your knees to change the angle of penetration. The guy may wish ... Views: 1797
I adore the American actress Cameron Diaz.
She dares to be ridiculously funny in ‘The Mask’, has men swooning over her in ‘There’s Something About Mary’, gets to kick butt in ‘Charlie’s Angels’, and is not shy in admitting that she can’t sing in ‘My Best Friend’s Wedding’. She smiles readily, ... Views: 1787
Do guys need to take protein supplement after making love to replenish the loss of protein?
There are many ingredients composing semen. A few of the constituent elements: vitamin C, calcium, chlorine, cholesterol, citric acid, creatine, fructose, lactic acid, magnesium, nitrogen, phosphorus, ... Views: 1746
I was on the MRT train with a new friend the other day, and he asked me what caused my marriage to end.
We were both standing, dangling from different handrail supports. I looked around. We were surrounded by a lot of other commuters. This person is not exactly soft-spoken either.
I ... Views: 1742
How will the first sex session be like?
Be aware of your feelings and know it is normal to feel excited and awkward at the same time. Talk to each other: ask what’s working and what isn’t, don’t assume that what feels good for you feels good for her.
During lovemaking, the penis is ... Views: 1737
If there is one question I am asked almost every time I meet somebody new, it is this: “Why did you become a sexologist?”
Even complete strangers on Facebook find it is their business to pose one-liner questions along the lines of: “Is your job for real?”
Occasionally my polite replies ... Views: 1735
What is considered a low sex drive for females?
There is often a sexual desire discrepancy between the male and female. I like to first emphasize that just because you have a lower sex drive than your partner does not necessarily mean there is something wrong with you. What this means is that ... Views: 1722
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How Can I Make My Orgams Stronger, Naturally? - by Dr. Martha Lee is Founder and Clinical Sexologist of Eros Coaching. She is a certified sexologist with a Doctorate in Human Sexuality. She provides sexuality and intimacy coaching for individuals and couples, conducts sexual education workshops and speaks at public events. For more, visit www.eroscoaching.com or email drmarthalee@eroscoaching.com.
The idea of having better orgasms isn’t meant to make you feel like there is anything wrong with the orgasms you’re currently having. Here are some basics: 1) Breathe so your orgasm becomes more of a full body experience; 2) Instead of tensing up and holding still during orgasm, move your body ... Views: 1683
When you fake an orgasm, you are essentially putting on a show for the benefit of your partner. Your reasons could vary from “getting it over with”, “sparing his feelings”, misleading yourself with “what he doesn’t know won’t hurt”, to the inner satisfaction of “pulling it off” and “getting away ... Views: 1565
For starters, you can use a vibrating ring which looks like a hair band except it has an external battery with an on-off switch. Have your husband stretch the vibrating ring over his penis and rest it at the base of his erect or non erect penis, and watch the penis come to live as you turn the ... Views: 1564
Possible reasons of multi-tasking during sex can vary considerably: from boredom due to predictability of sexual routine; stress and anxiety stemming from work; habitual need to overachieve; to genuine lack of time in juggling work and household chores. Sexual inhibition from any kind of trauma, ... Views: 1531
Loh Lik Peng.
Does this name sound familiar? If you are any Singaporean worth your salt, you would know that he is an hotelier and restaurateur with not one, not two, but three boutique hotels located in Singapore. What may be lesser known is that his empire also includes six restaurants in ... Views: 1523
It is normal for couples to have differences in their sexual desire. It is important for couples to begin by having a honest discussion with how often they need to have sex versus how often they would ideally like to have sex. There needs to be a conversation about the role sex plays in a ... Views: 1523
This is part four of a four-part series on sexual consent. The other pieces can be found here: Sexual consent: When no is no; Sexually Confused: When No is a Game; and No Go: Too Drunk to Consent.
In early December, paparazzi pictures of 19-year-old Hong Kong starlet, Rose Chan, being kissed ... Views: 1514
As the name suggests, it refers to the reverse of fast sex, think fine dining or a 12-course meal as opposed fast food. Slow sex does not necessarily infer to the amount of the time needed for sex, but the way it was being done – slow. It would be good to set aside 30minutes to practice slow ... Views: 1426
There is a place within a woman which is so famous that it is referred to by a singular alphabetic term. I am asked frequently, usually by men, just where this is. Many women are confused about whether they have one. The fixation has a lot to do with the belief that its stimulation results in an ... Views: 1388
Book Review: Shameless – How I Ditched the Diet, Got Naked, Found True Pleasure… and Somehow Got Home in Time to Cook Dinner by Pamela Madsen
I fell in ‘like’ with Pamela Madsen even before I heard about or read her first book Shameless. It happened when she shared her blog post ‘My Mother ... Views: 1384
Work out suitable times in the week both of you can make sex happen. It might sound unromantic to plan time for sex but we all know how to make time for what is important to us – and sex deserves us making time. The anticipation, lead-up and preparation for the date will make it ... Views: 1366
Have you heard of the expression, “Men don’t grow up; their toys just get bigger and more expensive.”? True, since adult men don’t talk of Matchbox cars, but full-sized motorized ones. What of their electronic devices and gadgets from the iPhone, Wii, mp3 players, to laptops?
While we have ... Views: 1365
I facilitated a session which defined sex, sexuality and intimacy during SlutTalk, a fringe event under SlutWalk Singapore. It was the inspiration for an earlier piece on publichouse.sg with the same title here. After my session, I thought I could go off-work, resume my civilian status, and was ... Views: 1337
Have you ever poured ‘cold water’ over somebody else’s happiness?
In a literal translation from the Chinese language, ‘pouring cold water’ means dousing the flames of passion. This usually happens when the opposite party is feeling elated about a new love, promotion or business deal, and ... Views: 1328