Self Improvement Site
On The Internet! Take the Self Improvement Tour
On The Internet! Take the Self Improvement Tour
Articles from Martha Tara Lee | Selfgrowth.com
- Book Review: The Joy of Sex - by Submitted on Mar 12, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeThe Joy of Sex: A Gourmet Guide to Love Making by Alex Comfort This original The Joy of Sex, first published in 1972, has often been credited with inventing the modern sex manual and enjoyed unprecedented success world-wide gracing 8 million homes. Illustrated with line-drawings and ...
Views: 2520(1 vote) - Dance – Your Way Into Your Body - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeWe are inundated, on a daily basis, with multiple messages about how our bodies can or should look better from slimming and facials to skin whitening and body hair removal. There is just so much we can be unhappy with when it comes to your bodies. How can we ever be happy with the way we look, ...
Views: 1256(1 vote) - Does the G-spot exist? - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeThere is a place within a woman which is so famous that it is referred to by a singular alphabetic term. I am asked frequently, usually by men, just where this is. Many women are confused about whether they have one. The fixation has a lot to do with the belief that its stimulation results in an ...
Views: 1479(1 vote) - Eat Your Heart Out - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeAccording to a new research study in the UK (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1341660/Six-10-women-dont-like-eating-partners.html?ITO=1490), more than 60 percent of British women in relationships do not feel comfortable eating in front of their partner, and almost half get shy when ...
Views: 1117(1 vote) - Erectile Dysfunction - by Submitted on Aug 18, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeHow much of erectile dysfunction is biological and how much of it is psychological? Erectile dysfunction, sometimes known as impotence, is attributed to physical causes in up to 85% of cases. Medical conditions linked to erectile concerns include heart disease, high blood pressure, diabetes, ...
Views: 1297(1 vote) - Female Sexual Dysfunctions - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeMany women have problems with sex at some stage in their life and it becomes more common as women get older. Having covered male sexual dysfunctions in a previous piece, let’s move onto the types of female sexual problems. Female sexual dysfunction refers to one or more of the following ...
Views: 928(2 votes) - Getaways for Couples in Singapore - by Submitted on Aug 22, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeLoh Lik Peng. Does this name sound familiar? If you are any Singaporean worth your salt, you would know that he is an hotelier and restaurateur with not one, not two, but three boutique hotels located in Singapore. What may be lesser known is that his empire also includes six restaurants in ...
Views: 1695(1 vote) - Male Sexual Dysfunctions - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeDuring my training to be a sexologist, I was confused by the differences between PE, DE, and ED. They are, namely, premature ejaculation, delayed ejaculation and erectile dysfunction or disorder, respectively. Later, I realised it was just as confusing for the men who have sexual concerns. ...
Views: 850(1 vote) - Masturbation is self-love - by Submitted on Feb 24, 2012 from Martha Tara LeeMention the word “Masturbation” and what do you think of? While masturbation means different things to different people, it is one of the most misunderstood subjects in the world, as it is enshrined in mystery and secrecy because of the simple reason we speak so little about it. Masturbation may ...
Views: 6752(1 vote) - Sex is Learned - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeSex is a learned act. That’s right: l-e-a-r-n-e-d. I remember contributing an article to an online portal a few months back. I had written the sentence: “For most people, sex is a learned act.” When the portal owner’s edits come back, she had written: “Don’t you mean, ‘For most people, sex is ...
Views: 1031(1 vote) - The elephant in the bedroom: Talking about sex - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeFor most people, sex is a sensitive and difficult subject to talk about. I have come across a man who, after 15 years of marriage, admitted that he and his wife have never talked about sex. Don’t get me wrong. They do have sex. They just don’t talk about it. In other words, they never ...
Views: 1152(1 vote) - Vaginismus – When a Woman’s Body Says ‘No’ - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeRecently a girlfriend admitted that until she met me, she had always thought that vaginismus was a myth – a disease that was made up, or had been eradicated in the ’80s, and most definitely did not exist in modern day. In fact, vaginismus is a very real sexual concern that women experience, ...
Views: 2606(1 vote) - Wellness – In What Other Ways? - by Submitted on Aug 18, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeLiving in harmony with nature’s rhythms and gifts is not easy in a heavily-developed world. Nature can be very helpful in restoring sensory, behavioural and emotional balance. Are we listening? We are constantly exposed to additives, preservatives, chemicals, artificial atmospheric and ...
Views: 1128(1 vote) - Don't Try. Be. - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeWhen I was in my third semester studying for my Doctorate in Human Sexuality, I went to the Florida Sex Therapy Institute to complete a Certificate in Sex Therapy. Dr Susan Lee, my teacher, introduced me to her clients I bumped into and her counterparts as ‘Dr Lee’. My first reaction was ...
Views: 1047(2 votes) - My Body in the Mirror - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeHow many of the people that you know are truly happy with their bodies? Be honest: Are you satisfied with yours? If not, you might have a body image issue. Body image does not just refer to aspects of our physical appearance, attractiveness, and beauty. It also has to do with the mental ...
Views: 956(1 vote) - Sex Heroes - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeA few weeks ago, while watching ‘Robin Hood’ starring Russell Crowe, I found myself cringing at the predictability of the plot. I am usually not so squeamish about my buttons being so obviously pushed. However, I walked away from the experience with a few observations about the preparation of ...
Views: 3071(3 votes) - Silence is golden - by Submitted on Feb 22, 2012 from Martha Tara LeeHave you heard of the saying, “Speech is Silver, Silence is Golden?” This phrase can be traced back to early Egyptians and it essentially means that while speaking is good, saying nothing is better. Discretion can be worth more than even eloquent words. Have you ever felt glad, relieved even, ...
Views: 1380(1 vote) - Pouring ‘Cold’ Water - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeHave you ever poured ‘cold water’ over somebody else’s happiness? In a literal translation from the Chinese language, ‘pouring cold water’ means dousing the flames of passion. This usually happens when the opposite party is feeling elated about a new love, promotion or business deal, and ...
Views: 752(3 votes) - I'd Rather Not Say - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeI was on the MRT train with a new friend the other day, and he asked me what caused my marriage to end. We were both standing, dangling from different handrail supports. I looked around. We were surrounded by a lot of other commuters. This person is not exactly soft-spoken either. I ...
Views: 1850(4 votes) - Book review: The Erotic Mind - by Submitted on Mar 12, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeThe Erotic Mind: Unlock the Inner Sources of Sexual Passion and Fulfillment by Jack Morin In this intriguing, insightful mix of analysis, anecdote and advice, San Francisco psychotherapist Morin developed an ‘erotic equation’ by drawing on the discussions of 351 respondents, straight and gay. ...
Views: 2641(1 vote) - Sexual Stereotypes - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeGentlemen prefer blondes? All blondes are dumb? All redheads are passionate? A man is always sex-, porn- and/ or looks-obsessed? Therefore, he is expected to sow his wild oats? The gay person is promiscuous? A woman is seductive when she is slim, and that’s why every woman wants to be slim—so ...
Views: 803(3 votes) - The Best Things in Life - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeReleased in 1992, ‘The Best Things in Life Are Free’ is a song by Janet Jackson and Luther Vandross. The song went to number one on the R&B singles chart and debuted at number 24 on the U.S. Billboard Hot 100 the week of May 30, 1992. Three weeks later, the song peaked at number 10 for three ...
Views: 908(1 vote) - Think Yourself into Health - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeThe Buddha is purported to have said “What we think, we become.” If your thoughts could change your life for the better, wouldn’t you do it? Of course! But, what thoughts do you change? All of us have an inner voice that speaks to us and us alone. Self-talk is that inner running dialogue you ...
Views: 821(1 vote) - What's Wrong with Sex? - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeRecently, I attended a men’s health forum on erectile difficulties. There were three male speakers scheduled, all of whom were medical doctors. Being a sexologist, I was always keen to learn more in the area of sexual dysfunction. I had pre-registered for the event and was queuing to sign in. ...
Views: 733(2 votes) - Vulvas and vaginas are pink - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeI didn’t know I had a vulva until I went to sex school. Don’t get me wrong. Of course, I do have a vulva (pronounced as ‘vuhl-vah’) and a vagina (pronounced ‘vha-gine-a’). I just didn’t know what they were called. I couldn’t even pronounce the word penis (pronounced as ‘pee-nis’) for that ...
Views: 2510(2 votes) - Best Positions to Have Sex - by Submitted on Aug 22, 2011 from Martha Tara Lee1. For a quickie You have a few minutes and you want it hot, quick and sexy! Try Wall Standing Sex where both partners are standing doing penetration. The female uses a wall to support herself while being penetrated. Tip: Bend your knees to change the angle of penetration. The guy may wish ...
Views: 1951(1 vote) - Better, betterer, betterest in sex - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeIs it possible to get better, ‘betterer’ and ‘betterest’ when it comes to sex? A certain Singapore minister was cited in the media as saying, “If you’re the best today, strive to be better. If you’re better today, strive to be ‘betterer’ and if you’re ‘betterer’ today, strive to be ...
Views: 1235(1 vote) - Getting Feedback After Sex (Part 1 of 2) - by Submitted on Aug 22, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeIn previous pieces*, I have covered how sex is not a one-way experience (in ‘Don’t Lie Back and Think of England’), as well as how sex can be like an elephant in the bedroom when it comes to communicating any problems that might be occurring. This week, I would like to suggest ways in which we ...
Views: 2603(1 vote) - Account of a Tuition Survivor - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeI had tuition from when I was in Primary One until Secondary Four. My younger sister started from when she was Kindergarten Two. She started early because she wouldn’t leave me alone during my tuition lessons – insisting on playing with me, talking with me, peeping on me – she felt left ...
Views: 1006 - Am I Doing Alright in Bed? - by Submitted on Aug 22, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeAm I doing alright in bed? How can I tell? We get turned on through our senses – seeing, feeling, touching, smelling, tasting, hearing – and through thought or fantasy. When we begin active sexual movements, we feel the flow of pleasurable feelings centering in the genitals and abdomen. The ...
Views: 1213 - Back on The Dating Scene - by Submitted on Aug 22, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeWhat’s the best way a guy who has been out of the dating scene for some time can get back in the game? Before venturing out into the dating world, take time to figure out who you are and what you are about such as listing a personal inventory of goals, lifestyle priorities, what works and ...
Views: 1057 - Being Woman: A Singaporean Chinese Writes - by Submitted on Aug 12, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeFor the longest time, being a woman, to me, meant being: -seen and not heard; -expected to help, serve (for instance cook, clean, iron) and please people around me, especially the men; -fertile, and being expected to bear children. -expected to look good, smell nice, and happy and positive ...
Views: 1233 - Book Review: His Needs, Her Needs - by Submitted on Mar 18, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeHis Needs, Her Needs: Building an Affair-Proof Marriage – Fifteenth Anniversary Edition (2001) by Willard F. Harley, Jr. Most of us are probably familiar with ‘The Five Languages of Love’ by Gary Chapman. These “Five Love Languages” have been useful in helping people speak and understand ...
Views: 2895 - Book Review: Impossible Motherhood – Testimony of an Abortion Addict - by Submitted on Mar 12, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeThe cover of book Impossible Motherhood is simple but alluring. It traces the outline of a woman with two lines, with the title and sub-title ‘Testimony of an Abortion Addict’ located where the pubic mons is. Then, there are three sets of red lines (each set has four lines with a fifth line ...
Views: 1359 - Book Review: Red Hot Touch - by Submitted on Mar 12, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeRed Hot Touch: A Head-to-Toe Handbook for Mind-Blowing Orgasms by Jaiya and Jon Hanauer Red Hot Touch is sizzling hot! It is possibly the modern-day equivalent of The Joy of Sex. The writing is fresh and playful; the content is incredibly useful and informative; and the techniques are ...
Views: 3632 - Book Review: Shameless - by Submitted on Mar 18, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeBook Review: Shameless – How I Ditched the Diet, Got Naked, Found True Pleasure… and Somehow Got Home in Time to Cook Dinner by Pamela Madsen I fell in ‘like’ with Pamela Madsen even before I heard about or read her first book Shameless. It happened when she shared her blog post ‘My Mother ...
Views: 1577 - Book Review: Sitting Moon – A Guide to Natural Rejuvenation After Pregnancy - by Submitted on Mar 12, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeI was drawn to the book Sitting Moon: A Guide to Natural Rejuvenation After Pregnancy at the library. It has in part to do with the professional-looking cover with a white background, as well as the sub-title: ‘Natural Rejuvenation’. Natural is always good, I thought. Another factor probably ...
Views: 2340 - Book Review: Stand by Her - by Submitted on Mar 12, 2011 from Martha Tara Lee‘Stand by Her: A Breast Cancer Guide for Men’ is a book by one brave man for other men who are witnessing their loved one fighting breast cancer and how to support them. These men can be their husbands, fathers, sons, brothers, friends, and coworkers. Written by John Anderson who has helped ...
Views: 1231 - Book Review: Women Who Love Sex - by Submitted on Mar 12, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeWomen Who Love Sex: Ordinary Women Describe Their Paths to Pleasure, Intimacy, and Ecstasy, by Gina Ogden Once I started reading the book, I did not want to put it down. It is beautifully and succinctly written by a woman who has had to deal with her own inner ‘ghosts’ and discomforts with ...
Views: 2173 - Can Food Boost Sexual Desire and Performance? - by Submitted on Aug 22, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeAphrodisiacs are substances that supposedly enhance erotic perceptions and sexual performance. In virtually all societies, people have sought such agents and have attributed magical or powerful properties to unusual substances, like ground rhinoceros horn. It is controversial whether any single ...
Views: 1264 - Client Confidentiality - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeAs the Lion City’s only clinical sexologist with a doctorate in human sexuality, I have often been asked by journalists, friends, and complete strangers to share my thoughts about what I felt was my most bizarre/ interesting/ fulfilling case. I could become the next media darling or belle of ...
Views: 1227 - Common Mistakes Men Make Sexually - by Submitted on Aug 22, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeIt is easy to point the finger elsewhere and say it is the men’s fault. For every man who we say is making a mistake, there are three fingers pointing back at you. Really, since men are not mind readers (though we would like them to be), we have to communicate. Men won’t be making ‘mistakes’ if ...
Views: 1304 - Do Guys Need to Take Protein Supplement After Making Love? - by Submitted on Aug 22, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeDo guys need to take protein supplement after making love to replenish the loss of protein? There are many ingredients composing semen. A few of the constituent elements: vitamin C, calcium, chlorine, cholesterol, citric acid, creatine, fructose, lactic acid, magnesium, nitrogen, phosphorus, ...
Views: 1898 - Does Frequent Masturbation Cause Premature Ejaculation? - by Submitted on Aug 22, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeFor most men, their earliest sexual experiences are with masturbation done secretly and quickly, for fear of being found out. Hence it is often believed that such early experience actually condition some men’s sexual response to a pattern of rapid ejaculation. In reality, masturbation is one of ...
Views: 2231 - Does Male Circumcision Make Sex More Pleasurable? - by Submitted on Aug 22, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeDoes male circumcision make sex more pleasurable for both the guy and the girl? The extra lubricating functions a foreskin provides are not present in men without a foreskin. However this can be remedied with the addition of a lubricant. If anything, the men I have encountered who underwent ...
Views: 2098 - Don’t Lie Back and Think of England - by Submitted on Aug 22, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeI am surprised that, in this day and age, I still am asked: “What can women do in bed besides lying back and thinking of England?” In case you are not familiar with this expression, it is an English saying with roughly the same meaning as “to grit one’s teeth”, i.e. to put up with what is ...
Views: 4385 - Do’s and Don’ts for Your Sex Dates - by Submitted on Aug 22, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeDo's Discuss what makes a good date in your opinion so your partner knows Take turns planning the date and making it happen the way you like it to Talking about what is going on in your relationship right now, or resolve old issues End the evening with a high note or with a fun ...
Views: 1382 - Enjoying my body, moving without agenda - by Submitted on Feb 22, 2012 from Martha Tara LeeLast September, I attended a ten-day residential program, which is part of the Sexological Bodywork certification in Australia. Though this was the second time I was going through this program, I was returning as one of four assistant coaches. I felt it was important to connect with my community ...
Views: 1482 - Facebook’s Bra Colour Campaign For Breast Cancer Hurts More Than It Helps - by Submitted on Aug 22, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeI first learnt about the ‘Facebook Bra Color Campaign’ through the blog post by sex-positive activist Carlin Ross who works alongside the legendary Betty Dodson. The campaign, believed to be started by women in Detroit, Michigan, who are trying to raise awareness of Breast Cancer, asked women ...
Views: 2708 - Faking Orgasm – Good or Bad? - by Submitted on Aug 22, 2011 from Martha Tara LeeWhen you fake an orgasm, you are essentially putting on a show for the benefit of your partner. Your reasons could vary from “getting it over with”, “sparing his feelings”, misleading yourself with “what he doesn’t know won’t hurt”, to the inner satisfaction of “pulling it off” and “getting away ...
Views: 1734