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Birth is a life-changing experience. Each birth brings with it a new and different set of experiences and feelings, but birth trauma can have serious and long-lasting effects.
A Swedish study showed that those who have a traumatic and painful birth are more likely to end their life with ... Views: 1425
Why did this happen to me? How could God let it happen to me? These are the questions we often ask ourselves when we are victims of any kind of abuse...whether it be spousal abuse or stranger abuse.
Now that I have your attention, allow me to introduce myself. I am Loretta Hall, victim of ... Views: 1544
Ten Ways to Prevent Narcissistic Re-victimization
One of the greatest fears of those in recovery from narcissistic abuse is re-victimization. People feel powerless against the covert mind control used by narcissists to trap unknowing victims. Knowledge is power. Awareness is protection. ... Views: 1894
For years and years cocaine was one of the most dreaded drugs. It was labeled as highly addictive and then along came crack cocaine and that was placed in a league of its own, one that was extremely lethal. Maybe it is the hype surrounding the surge in prescription opiate addiction but it seems ... Views: 3323
Freedom is the key to joy and peace. Living alcohol and drug-free gives you the opportunity to experience true freedom, not the false high you get when drunk or high.
There are many programs available to people who want to get sober but there are few programs available for those who want to ... Views: 3801
I often come across sad examples of the powers of self-delusion that the narcissist provokes in his victims. It is what I call "malignant optimism". People refuse to believe that some questions are unsolvable, some diseases incurable, some disasters inevitable. They see a sign of hope in every ... Views: 2220
There is one place in which one's privacy, intimacy, integrity and inviolability are guaranteed - one's body, a unique temple and a familiar territory of sensa and personal history. The torturer invades, defiles and desecrates this shrine. He does so publicly, deliberately, repeatedly and, ... Views: 2310
When we are abused as children, we don’t get the protection and care that we deserve from our parents. We grow up not knowing what really good parenting is. My father was a charismatic character who had many good qualities, but also self-indulgent narcissistic ones that led him to abuse me ... Views: 4964
Time for Healing
We have to go through some unfortunate experiences sometimes in our life. When you speak with other people you will always find out how easy your experience is in comparison to what they have suffered. The impact that experience has brought on your life cannot be identified in ... Views: 2109
Talk to a partner or friend – they could help you highlight some self-help ideas.
Try to stop drinking alcohol on weekdays and make some minor lifestyle changes like increasing your physical activity.
When you are drinking, try to substitute every second drink with water, non-alcoholic beer, ... Views: 2102
"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me" Remember that old saying that we used as kids to try to cope with name-calling? It probably wasn't very successful then, and in fact, just isn't true. We now know that words can hurt.
We always knew that words could ... Views: 2650
("He" in this text - to mean "He" or "She").
We react to serious mishaps, life altering setbacks, disasters, abuse, and death by going through the phases of grieving. Traumas are the complex outcomes of psychodynamic and biochemical processes. But the particulars of traumas depend heavily on ... Views: 1630
From the moment someone is born, their mother has incredible power over them. She has the power to build them up or the power to tear them down. Ideally, one would have had a mother who was: loving, supportive and kind, for instance. But there are also people out there who had the complete ... Views: 2066
Abusers exploit, lie, insult, demean, ignore (the "silent treatment"), manipulate, and control.
There are a million ways to abuse. To love too much is to abuse. It is tantamount to treating someone as an extension, an object, or an instrument of gratification. To be over-protective, not to ... Views: 1857
LOVE vs FEAR?
Fear is an emotion caused by either outer danger or inner false beliefs
• Like so many popular ‘spiritual’ saying there’s some truth in it but NOT the whole story, so people can get easily confused & also misuse it.
• Generally, this statement means that if we have enough ... Views: 4466
YES, I WAS HURT BY MY FAMILY,
but they were hurting too, poor things!
This is a phrase I’ve heard over the years, & it always makes me mad.
You may at first think this post is harsh or unfair, BUT please remember that everything our parents were - WE internalized into our Negative ... Views: 3947
In Memoriam: Alice Miller
One of the great advocates of children and their struggles against unrecognized mistreatment has died. “Alice Miller, a psychoanalyst who repositioned the family as a locus of dysfunction with her theory that parental power and punishment lay at the root of nearly ... Views: 3167
Author: Jared Bryan Smith
ISBN: 9780984595501
Jared Bryan Smith with his hippopotamus sea; my viral sobriety transports his readers to a place that most would not dare to go, or wouldn't even think of going.
In excruciating detail, Smith's biographical account details the life of a tragic ... Views: 1470
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE ON THE RISE- HOW CAN YOU PROTECT YOURSELF
Just this summer, Governor Schwarzenegger cut funding for all Domestic Violence Programs in the state of California as part of his $489 million in budget cuts. You certainly don’t need to be a psychic to predict an increase in ... Views: 2045
As a survivor of domestic violence, I have learned that fear can play a big part in keeping women locked in abusive relationships. Some of those fears are very real and some are just illusions. Threats by the abuser, threats against the children, or physical violence are truly real fears. ... Views: 2433
It was more than twenty five years ago, and it was a day that I will never forget. I had given birth to my second son in the beginning of September. I brought him home to a one bedroom apartment. The bedroom was big, both of my sons slept in there and my husband at the time and I slept on a ... Views: 1711
IDENTIFYING PTSD FROM CHILDHOOD ABUSE
And 3 STEPS TO BEGIN HEALING
Bettina “Sparkles” Obernuefemannn
I’ve learned during the past 20 years that almost all of us on planet earth have experienced some kind of trauma or loss, now more commonly recognized as POST TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER ... Views: 1687
As a psychiatrist that specializes in addiction (including teenage alcoholism and teenage drug abuse), I am amazed at how lax some parents are about teenage substance abuse. As every one who has raised a teen knows, it is the age where your child asserts his independence, and pushes back when ... Views: 2382
"NOW faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen." Heb 11:1
Whether your'e thinking about yesterday, pondering the events of today, visualising your future in ten years time, or remembering an experience in your childhood, you are creating NOW, in this ... Views: 1166
As an abused person you will have often been tricked and taken advantage of by people in your immediate circle, and even by strangers. You may even believe that abusers can sense your obvious victimhood like an animal sniffs out its prey. Do you believe that you have a look or an aura, like a ... Views: 2568
Some of the writing about Borderline Personality Disorder by therapists and health care professionals seems to almost disparage the emotional sensitivity of sufferers who are characterized as experiencing widely varying emotional responses that can swing from anger to delight in a moment. Some ... Views: 6563
Every month should be Child Abuse Prevention Month. As a parent educator, mother of three children and former preschool teacher, I am appalled by the growing rate of child abuse, neglect, maltreatment and murders in our country.
Why is it that, in a country such as ours, where we are always ... Views: 1847
When you reach a point in your life that you realize that alcohol is creating problems, then you know that a change is required. Some people drink far more than the doctor recommends but are completely happy with the effect upon their life and their health, and that's fine; you are the person ... Views: 1679
Letter to my children, just before the start of their college year
A father reflects upon his first 50 years in a letter to his college age children about how to wisely choose their friends. It started as private, family email. But the children realized the potential of this Life Lessons ... Views: 2330
Throughout my childhood I received consistent messages that demonstrated the power of a dysfunctional family. The disease of my parents and abusers robbed me of my boundaries and individuality – the right to have a self.
Remembering back now, through the years of oppression and sexual abuse, ... Views: 1683
A lot of survivors of sexual and physical abuse feel they need to confront someone about it. Face down the perpetrator and tell him (usually him) – tell him what? That what he did was wrong. That it was hurtful and did substantial harm.
I imagine it could amazingly empowering to do that. ... Views: 1774
Alcoholism - To Sobriety - To Business Success - My Story
I am a true believer that alcoholism is a disease and, unfortunately that disease was bestowed upon me. I started KAS Placement when I was 23 years old (I am 28 now) and began making a lot of money for somebody my age. I would spend it ... Views: 2502
Millions of people enjoyed Michael Jackson’s genius as a showman, however, his legacy is even greater if we learn from his life story.
During a TV interview, “Living with Michael Jackson,” Michael stated he was beaten by his father. He was so terrified he became physically ill when he saw ... Views: 3735
*Sylvia’s husband had a rule: If you can’t be home right after work, you had to call. When she rushed a co-worker to the hospital, in the confusion, Sylvia called about thirty minutes after she was due home. When she did phone home, he accused her of cheating on her and lying. The moment she ... Views: 4627
There is ritual sexual abuse and there is ritualized sexual abuse. The terms are sometimes interchanged, but for the purpose of this article I am delineating between the two as Ritual Sexual Abuse being cult or cult-like abuse in which “the abuse has a spiritual or social goal” (David Finkelhor, ... Views: 1710
Abusive conduct is not a uniform, homogeneous phenomenon. It stems and emanates from multiples sources and manifests in a myriad ways. Following are a few useful distinctions which pertain to abuse and could serve as organizing, taxonomical principles (dimensional typologies) in a kind of ... Views: 2353
Former Prime Minister of Japan Shinzo Abe’s outspoken warning to China that Tokyo and Washington won't stand-by if Beijing attacked Taiwan is a communication to President Xi Jinping to tone down his combativeness over Taipei.
Speaking nearly at a forum organized by a Taiwanese think tank ... Views: 676
Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think I would become an award winning international speaker, international businessman and bestselling author. Let me explain why I felt that none of these things were within my reach.
Today I truly believe that greatness, prosperity and success are our ... Views: 2744
When domestic violence is before the court, fortified with finance and politics, the net result is the protective parent is about punishment and the children are about abuse.
Sound strange? If you’re living it, the strange nightmare while twisted is ever so true.
Far too often when domestic ... Views: 1287
It seems that we've all suffered a broken heart at one time or another. The pain that it causes and brings is horrific. Few, if anyone, ever wants to go through that again. So how do you prevent it? And if we can actually do that, is it a good thing?
The only sure way to prevent a broken ... Views: 5810
If you have been abused as a child in any way and this affects your confidence, first of all recognize that the love has to come from you. This is hard, if you have been trained by parents/guardians/people in authority that you were not lovable. Of course, this is to justify their abusive ... Views: 2114
The following words and poetry were written by Kallel Hunter. She has graciously allowed me to share them with you.
My name is Kallel and I am 13 years old. I live in the U.K. and have Irish, Jamaican and Barbadian in me. I also have two sisters and 3 brothers. I am the eldest. We ... Views: 2477
TOP SECRET ABOUT CHILDHOOD PTSD
Are you experiencing too many PTSD Triggers?
Do you still get “startled” or “react with rage or suffer other symptoms?
I have shocking news for you. You haven’t fully released all your childhood demons or core PTSD issues.
The least known fact about ... Views: 1563
Oh, how the ego rebels against the thought of humility. "If I'm humble, I'll be a nothing. I'll vanish! I must be distinguished, different, better than! Only by standing out will I have an identity," it screams. We in recovery have felt the stinging reprisals from our fellows when we listened to ... Views: 5690
When it became clear that I felt the need to be loyal to my father, towards the end of 2015, and that this was holding me back, I knew that I needed to do something else. The emotional processing work that I was doing at this time wasn’t having much of an impact on this issue.
The Wrong ... Views: 1498
If I wanted to ask my mother something when I was younger, I would often wait until there were guests around. The reason for this was that I knew that there was less chance of my mother raising her voice or losing her temper.
Through having other guests around or oven just one person, it ... Views: 1468
I remember being with a friend and doing some pad work; we were both taking turns to punch and kick the pad. After a while we both needed something to drink, so we headed over to the shop.
Interestingly, my friend said that if we waited a little while, his mother would be back and then we ... Views: 1469
In 2012, I started to read books on child abuse, and the only time that I had read anything like this before was in 2009, when I read the book ‘Toxic Parents’ by Susan Forward. So, up until this point, I had primarily been reading books on self-development.
As far as I knew, I just lacked ... Views: 1364
A little while ago, when I was online, I read something that really stood out. The general gist was that due to how busy people are in today’s world, they haven’t got the time to have years of therapy.
As a result of this, they need to be able to transform their life in a much shorter period ... Views: 897
How much of my time have I spent worrying about what other people think of me? Too much is the short answer. Before recovery in Al-Anon, I had no boundaries, no sense of self, and how I felt about myself and my life was largely determined by whether or not you approved. With no internal ... Views: 6501