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Articles from Dr. Dennis Neder | Selfgrowth.com
- I Feel Like I’ve Been Waiting Forever! - by Submitted on Feb 23, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederDoc: My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years. We have lived together for 2 years and we get along fine. We have our times but not many of them. I do everything for him: cook, clean, and everything else a wife would do. I love him very much but I want to start a family. I don't mean ...
Views: 908 - Trouble in Break-Up City - by Submitted on Dec 20, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederDr. Neder, My fiancé decided it was best to end our two year relationship about a month and a half ago. In this time I have realized why she did it and that she meant more to me than I ever knew. I made a lot of mistakes that I didn't see until now. I talked to her about a month ago and ...
Views: 908 - The "Date Canceller" and other Feminine Games - by Submitted on Jun 11, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc! I've noticed a trend in my dating life that is really starting to piss me off. It's rare for me to make plans with a girl and to not have her try to cancel on me or suddenly be "too busy" to keep our date. I'm so tired of games like that. Are they trying to see how much I want them or ...
Views: 900 - In a Sea of Messages, This One's Mixed! - by Submitted on Oct 12, 2005 from Dr. Dennis NederIn a Sea of Messages, This One’s Mixed Hello Doctor, I need your advice on a little dilemma of mine. There is this guy that I've known for quite some time now. It started off with just getting together for drinks and then a couple times for dinner, but it's been over a year and I don't know ...
Views: 891 - The Girl at Work - by Submitted on Oct 11, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Neder: I have liked a woman at my work for sometime now. We were out with others from work one evening and I admitted to her how I felt after getting a little drunk. She was perfectly sober since she was the designated driver. At the same time, she told me that she was also attracted ...
Views: 891 - Why “Working it From the Inside” Doesn’t Work - by Submitted on Jan 17, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederOne of the most common questions I get comes from guys starts off with “I have this woman friend. We’ve been close friends for over a year now, but she has a boyfriend…” Sound familiar? This is something I call trying to “work it from the inside”. In effect, these guys figure that if they can ...
Views: 890 - I Don’t Want to Look Like an Idiot! - by Submitted on May 24, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc! I work with this girl I really like and I talk to her every time we have a chance. She is the reason why I still stay at my job. She is funny and she makes me have a fun time whenever we work together, but I don't know if she likes me. First off, she has a boyfriend, but it seems she ...
Views: 888 - Just How Does A Guy Meet A Girl, Anyway? - by Submitted on Jul 26, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederHello Doc: I've never really known much of anything about dating. I'm 26 years old and I've never had a serious relationship. I feel like I've missed out on a lot of knowledge over the years and I feel like I'm sunk. Where can I go to meet people? How do I introduce myself when I find ...
Views: 881 - The Problem: Inertia - by Submitted on Oct 18, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Dennis: I’ve read a number of your articles where you talk about having “game” (the ability to meet women, get numbers, etc.) Unfortunately, I don’t have any! I’m more of a home-type person who wants to get out and do more with life but a lot of times I find it difficult to do. It ...
Views: 878 - Why Can’t I Meet Someone That’s Available? - by Submitted on Jan 25, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederHello Dr. Neder: HELP! Oh yes, a word you probably see all the time. But surely there is no plain and simple way to understand men or even women for that matter. Here’s my dilemma: I am a single, pretty, tall, 24-year-old woman. I have had a couple of boyfriends here and there, but just one ...
Views: 872 - In Love With A One-Night-Stand Man - by Submitted on Sep 03, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederDr. Neder: I met a man through the oddest of ways – a mis-sent text message! It went to the wrong phone number and somehow we started to text each other, exchanged photos of ourselves and started to flirt. He is an older man with a really sexy voice and is a successful business owner. We ...
Views: 861 - Moving On and Knowing That You’ve Moved On - by Submitted on May 17, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederI really am in need of some real help I am a 19 year old man Last year I moved away from my first love who I dated for a year. I don't believe that I ever got over her. I went through a great deal of pain and grieved so much but I’m finding it tough to move on. I don’t understand how a person ...
Views: 861 - Asking A Guy Out - by Submitted on Oct 24, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Dennis, I'm a single gal who (despite being very attractive) has not been on a date with a man in a year. I have exchanged numbers with several men during that time but none seem interested (mainly they were dating another girl already so I keep missing my chance.) I keep a very friendly, ...
Views: 858 - Is it Time to Move in Together? - by Submitted on Jan 18, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Neder: This seems silly to me, but I am always in favor of a second opinion. My boyfriend of 1 ½ years and I are considering moving in together. Well, I suggested it and now it is on the table. You hit the nail on the head with your articles ...
Views: 856 - Building Experience From Inexperience - by Submitted on Feb 01, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederHello. I'm 28 years old and I've been with my husband for 10 years. We were very young when we got married and my husband had very little dating experience before we met. He is a great guy, but he has a hard time reading body language and sometimes misses the point even when I'm being blunt ...
Views: 854 - Do YOU Have Different Rules For Women? - by Submitted on Jan 11, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederHere's an interesting question I was recently asked: are there different rules for women and men when it comes to the entire dating/sex/relationship game, and if so, what standards should women enjoy that men don't? One of the reasons why women pull things like "the crying game" (NOT the movie ...
Views: 854 - The Reality of “Being Friends” - by Submitted on Dec 13, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Doctor, I am getting to know a Christian girl. We have been going out for almost two months and I told her that I like her. In the beginning she told me that she was not interested in a relationship right now but was ok with being friends and she continues to go out with me. She answers my ...
Views: 848 - How to NOT Impress Women With Gifts - by Submitted on Mar 21, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Doc! This girl I know casually through work invited me to a party. I am going to give her a nice perfume that costs about $100. Is that a good idea? She also said there will be lots of girls there. How do I start a conversation with a girl in a party and get her phone number? This is a big ...
Views: 845 - Guy’s Girl Wants To Get Back With Her Ex - by Submitted on Sep 26, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederDoc: There’s the girl that I’ve been getting to know. We aren’t really together, but we’ve been moving that way. A few days ago she and I were talking and she said that she wanted to get back with her ex-boyfriend! At first, I didn’t think much of this, but I was wondering, is there any way to ...
Views: 844 - Where in the Hell are They? (Potential Partners) - by Submitted on Feb 07, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc: I'm 25, and I've been out of the dating scene as well as college for a couple of years now. I'm not a drinker, so I don't go to bars, and I'm not a dancer, so I don't go to clubs. So where can I go to meet someone who would date a guy like me? And what places are appropriate to ...
Views: 844 - Going Through Hell - by Submitted on May 25, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc: My fiancé just left me about a week ago she says she needs to find her self and figure out what she wants. We were together for just over 3 years and have our problems like any relationship. I have a hard time expressing my deep feelings and at times I am independent and distant I ...
Views: 839 - Talk is Cheap – Learn to Do It Right! - by Submitted on Jul 19, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Neder, I saw your articles on the Internet and was hoping that you would give me some advice. My ex-boyfriend broke up with me almost five months ago. He and I were friends for a few years before we dated, and we dated for about 11 months. What bothered him most (as far as he would ...
Views: 839 - A Matter Of Trust - by Submitted on Aug 06, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederDoc: I have been seeing this woman on and off for over 1 year, we have only been seeing each other seriously since the beginning of May. We have had difficulties with trust from both ends in the past, but things have improved dramatically over the past few months. 99% of the time I trust her ...
Views: 838 - Learning to Climax During Intercourse - by Submitted on Apr 23, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr Neder I have a sexual problem. I enjoy having sex, but it seems I never reach orgasm. It's really bothering me because I can reach orgasm only by stimulating the clitoris, but when I am having sex with my boyfriend it just doesn't happen. Could you tell me what can I ...
Views: 835 - Should I Contact Her Again? - by Submitted on Oct 17, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederHi, So a week ago I met this girl. She was an old high school friend of a new student in my department that I don't know well yet. Anyway, I had a great time chatting with this girl. We had lived in/traveled to similar places, had similar complaints about the local traffic, and so on. It seemed ...
Views: 834 - Why It's So Hard To Not Be A 'Nice Guy' - by Submitted on Jan 04, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederOh, how easy it is for us to slip into "nice guy" mode! We have a natural tendency to want to be nice guys and even believe that this is exactly what women want from us. As you probably know, it's not. Then, why do we do this? Let me tell you a little story (I'll keep it short): Many years ago, ...
Views: 834 - Confusing Girl-Games - by Submitted on Jan 30, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc – I’m confused?! I met a nice girl, she is funny, smart and all that I'm looking for in a relationship. When I started talking to her, she told me that she was looking for new friends because the other friends she had would smother her and just try to get in her pants. I ...
Views: 831 - The Farmer's Milk - by Submitted on Aug 17, 2005 from Dr. Dennis NederHello, I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for almost 11 months. Just the other day he tells me that he thinks we should just remain friends and nothing more. Two days later he called me and we talked about our relationship and he told me that I do make him happy and he enjoys our ...
Views: 831 - The Magic of the Approach - by Submitted on Mar 15, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederHave you ever seen a magician at a party walking around doing close-up magic? Everyone seems fascinated by it – even if the magician isn’t that good. There are probably just as many people hoping the performer will flop as those that are fascinated by it. This brings me to an interesting way to ...
Views: 826 - What’s Her Problem? - by Submitted on Nov 08, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederI met this girl online about 6 weeks ago and we clicked right away. We talked via the phone and internet for hours at a time almost every night. We even had live video sessions with each other so when she moved back into the area we met up face to face and she seemed to be interested in me. She ...
Views: 823 - I’m No Longer His “Dream” - by Submitted on Nov 22, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederHi, Dr. Dennis I am a 34 year old woman who is insanely attracted (you could even say devoted) to a 56 year old man who still makes me melt after almost 4 years of knowing him. We have seen photos of each other, but our only contact has been via e-mail and telephone – never in person. I met ...
Views: 822 - Getting Past Your Past - by Submitted on Jun 14, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederDr. Neder, I came across your articles on the Internet and thought I’d write for some advice. The short story is this: I was sexually abused throughout most of my younger years. Now, as I start to cope with this as a 32 year old man, I have found a 22 year old woman with whom I share many ...
Views: 819 - A Pair of Jackasses Beats a Straight Flush - by Submitted on Mar 25, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Neder, I have been reading your column for a while and I never thought that I might need help myself. But lo and behold I am here writing you this letter. I am naturally a cocky, funny asshole beautiful girl which lets me date out of my league and makes men bend over backwards for ...
Views: 813 - Is She Just a Habit - by Submitted on Dec 14, 2005 from Dr. Dennis NederYou and she are a couple and have been dating for awhile. You’ve fallen into a pattern that seems comfortable and even safe. Sure, you fight once in a while, but you have fun too. The only problem is that you’re bored and you’re wondering what else you’re missing out there. It’s easy to fall ...
Views: 810 - Where to Start Learning “The Game” - by Submitted on Apr 12, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederI get a lot of “beginner” questions from men about dating, relationships, sex and “the game” in general. Actually, that’s a very good thing! It shows that guys are really trying to learn what it takes to become better players – and ultimately better partners for the women we love. So, how do ...
Views: 807 - Lying is Bad – Um-Kay? - by Submitted on Apr 04, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederDoc: I met my girlfriend online and we've been together for about 3 months (we’re both in our 30’s.) When we first started going out, I was dating another girl from online too. I was not attracted to this other girl romantically but thought she could be a friend. The problem is I lied to my ...
Views: 805 - Handling The “Hard-to-Get” Game - by Submitted on Dec 19, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Dennis! I’ve read your website and I think you might be able to help me. I’ve had numerous relationships and have no trouble getting girls. I’m approaching 30 now and trying to find the girl of my dreams. There is this girl I have known for about a year or so that has always not only ...
Views: 804 - Game-Playing Girlfriend - by Submitted on Jan 24, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Dr. Neder, I read some of your articles and your advice is great. I just recently hooked up with a girl that actually picked me up at club. She really liked me a lot and for the first few weeks, I played hard to get with her. She wanted to get me settled down and kind of coerced me into a ...
Views: 797 - Which is Best – Same or Different? - by Submitted on Oct 04, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc: I have a question which might sound a bit unusual but; do relationships work best between people who are different or people who are similar? ============= Hello! Actually, as with so many things, it depends! Obviously, it's a good idea to have some things in common such as hobbies, ...
Views: 797 - Men are Dumb Too! - by Submitted on Jul 25, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederLast week’s article focused on how women can be dumb (or at least, do dumb things) in relationships. It’s not that men are dumb, but we also do a bunch of dumb things – I see them everyday! Here are the top ten: 1) Becoming the “friend” Almost everyone fears rejection, especially; so it would ...
Views: 789 - This Guy Is Too Damn Nice! - by Submitted on Oct 29, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Neder: I am 22 and the guy I am writing about is 35. The age difference doesn’t bother me at all but the fact he treats me like a princess does. I have always been attracted to the bad boy type so really I am not sure why I was even attracted to this guy. He is an amazing guy ...
Views: 783 - Can This Marriage Be Saved? - by Submitted on May 25, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Doctor, I am 26 years old woman, married for about 3 years. I am a positive person with self-esteem and confidence in the future. I have a great CV with high education and experience. However it is not easy to find good income work in the country I live in where most good positions rely ...
Views: 782 - Being “Too Shy” - by Submitted on Aug 22, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederThere’s a new girl coming to our school this year. I want to make a good impression because I have a crush on her. Around school, I’m the clown, the guy who lightens things up with laughs but it usually involves embarrassing myself. I'm just too shy so its hard for me to ask her out or even talk ...
Views: 770 - Interviewing For the Love of Your Life - by Submitted on Mar 22, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederYou probably had to interview in order to get your job. This interview process is an extremely important part of being hired because it tells the employer many things about you – how well you think on your feet, how well thought out your answer to questions are, how you present yourself, etc. ...
Views: 770 - Sabotaging Your Relationship - by Submitted on Aug 15, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Neder: I came across your website as I was searching for “sabotaging relationships”. My "boyfriend" (of 3 intense months) has brought up that term for the third time. We are challenged by distance as he lives about an hour away from me. He works 6 days a week at a very intense job in a ...
Views: 768 - Women are Dumb! - by Submitted on Jul 18, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederYep! That’s right - women are dumb. Well ok, not all women are dumb but many of you sure do some dumb things when dating or in relationships. I get letters every day that just make me shake my head. I have to wonder whether or not these people really want to be in happy, healthy, fulfilling ...
Views: 768 - Approach Without Nervousness - by Submitted on Sep 19, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Neder: How do I approach this girl again without acting nervous? There's this really beautiful girl that I like at school (college) one day when I was in the library I noticed her looking at me so I looked at her and we stared at each other for a pretty long time (maybe 5 seconds, ...
Views: 767 - How Do I Make it Through - by Submitted on Feb 15, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Dennis, I was in a relationship for 5 and a half years. The relationship is breaking up. My partner is not satisfied with me, I believe. He has said he wants to see other people and wants to consider other options. But he says he still cares or me and he is confused. I just read a ...
Views: 767 - Just Never Satisfied! - by Submitted on Dec 17, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Dr. Neder, I am a 24 year-old med student and cannot find the right woman. I have been told I'm a handsome and outgoing, and my women friends always tell me I'm a catch. I've been involved with a couple women that logically seem like the type I'd like to get involved with, but I never ...
Views: 764 - What We Have Here Is a Failure to Communicate! - by Submitted on Oct 19, 2005 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc: I've been attending Massage Therapy class with this girl, and I really like her, but she won't give me anything except one word answers to anything I ask her! We've worked on each other here and there, but not actively. I usually ask her how she's doing, after long periods of ...
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