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Articles from Dr. Dennis Neder | Selfgrowth.com
- Should a Woman Ask a Guy Out? - by Submitted on Apr 25, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederI keep reading that if a man is interested he will ask you out (which I think is true to a point). When a guy asks you out that definitely shows interest, but it is hard for me to believe that every single guy has the guts to ask out all the girls he has been interested in. My question is: ...
Views: 17044(3 votes) - 10-Steps To Constructive Arguing - by Submitted on Mar 14, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Doc! I’ve been with my girlfriend for 4 years. I am planning to marry her in 5 years. She fulfills every criterion as my soul mate except one point: sometimes when she is under pressure even the slightest thing can set her off. She goes to the extreme saying hurtful things. She ...
Views: 12083 - Conversations for a First, Second or Third Date - by Submitted on May 07, 2011 from Dr. Dennis NederMany people complain that they “hate to date”. Are you one of them? If so, it’s very likely that you’re afraid of just having to make “good” conversation. You don’t want it to come off as labored but you don’t want the awkward silences or misunderstandings and miscommunications either. If ...
Views: 9270 - Does My Boyfriend Appreciate Me? - by Submitted on Apr 18, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederHello Doc! I've been dating a guy for awhile now. I haven't had many relationships, so I'm getting used to moving out of the honeymoon stage. My problem is, I know it's normal to get used to people and kind of let your faults come through as you get more comfortable with the person. I’m ...
Views: 8954(3 votes) - Some Women Get Mad When You Say "No"! - by Submitted on Feb 04, 2011 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Doc! Why is it that when women turn men down for sex, they expect us to be understanding and caring, and when men turn women down, they flip out?? Here's the situation: I broke up with a girl I had been with, but have been able to remain minor friends. I know you don't think that's a ...
Views: 8815(1 vote) - The Three Keys to the Cold Approach - by Submitted on Mar 08, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederDo you find it difficult to approach women you don’t know? Most guys do so don’t feel alone. I’m going to give you the three keys that’ll make the cold approach easy, fun and very, very profitable. Key #1 – Practice talking to everyone, everywhere If the only time you try to talk to strangers ...
Views: 8141 - Men and “The Hunt” Explained - by Submitted on Nov 10, 2010 from Dr. Dennis NederI get lots of letters about all sorts of dating, sex and relationship problems every day. It’s interesting that they so often fall into clearly defined categories. One of the most common comes from women that follow various prescribed paths only to find that they prevent or destroy their ...
Views: 6974(4 votes) - Tired of Being Single - by Submitted on Jul 12, 2011 from Dr. Dennis NederDr. Neder: I am a 36 year old woman who has been single for 3 years and I'm tired of it. I feel I'm of average attractiveness, I have a good job as an accountant, I run (marathons even!), hike, travel, have lots of friends, etc. I often hear advice from my attached friends, but the advice is ...
Views: 6583(3 votes) - Building Attraction in Men - by Submitted on Nov 04, 2011 from Dr. Dennis Neder“Just what do men want anyway?” Yes, I get that question a lot these days and no, I don’t just answer with “sex”. (Yes, men want sex, but that’s not really the answer to this question.) You keep hearing that “men are simple” and that’s not really true. It’s based on that however that you ...
Views: 6434(1 vote) - My Girlfriend is a Liar! - by Submitted on May 27, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederIt started as white lies at first about small things then on to more serious things. She is not a very good liar and exposes herself with inconsistent stories and I’m just about fed up. For instance, she was talking to a few guys before me, and lies about them not calling her. There are a more ...
Views: 5826 - The Cheating Girlfriend - by Submitted on Jan 23, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Doc, I've been with my girlfriend for about a year and a half now and we're both 18. She told me last night that she had cheated on me while on holiday recently. She said a guy kissed her, while she was drunk, and she only realized after a few seconds what was happening and stopped it. I ...
Views: 4763 - My Neighbor’s Hot – And She Knows It! - by Submitted on Dec 06, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc: I've had a few girlfriends in the past and have no problems with experience. I don’t think I’m God's gift to women, but I’m not particularly ugly either. I've fallen for a neighbor girl. I'm not shy to talk to her, but she's just perfect. She's a very nice person, but thinks quite a ...
Views: 4737 - Should Women Approach Men? - by Submitted on Jul 15, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Neder: I have conflicting thoughts about whether or not it is okay for a female to initiate the conversation with the male. Many people that I know and even those on this board swear by the fact that it is the wrong thing to do. They say it will scare the man off or make him less ...
Views: 4239(8 votes) - Why is Having Sex Too Early Bad? - by Submitted on May 20, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dennis: The girls that give sex up front are getting all the guys, but they don't seem to keep them for long. Guys view them as a fuck buddy type thing but not for a real relationship. The women who wait a bit to give out sex live most of their lives lonely, but end up marrying the guy at ...
Views: 4116 - Strong Women, Submissive Women - by Submitted on Dec 07, 2005 from Dr. Dennis NederDo you know a sexy, strong woman at your place of work? Perhaps she’s a manager or business owner. Maybe she’s a salesperson that works with your company or she represents a vendor. Do you want to know a little secret about her? She’s very likely demure and submissive in the bedroom! What’s ...
Views: 3556 - Girlfriend Travels With Ex-Boyfriend - by Submitted on Sep 24, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederI am in a serious relationship with this girl, and we are seriously contemplating getting engaged in the future. However, we often get stuck on one issue: her ex-boyfriends. She keeps in touch with several. She has always been very honest with me about them, but it is obvious that she is very ...
Views: 3369 - Stuck Between a Friendship and Something More - by Submitted on Aug 05, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Doc: I've known this girl for about a year now and I like her a lot. To cut a long story short, I've lost her twice now because of my lack of confidence which stops her from seeing me as more than a friend. She knows I'm interested and we almost had something but I pushed her away ...
Views: 3313 - Will He Marry Me? - by Submitted on Dec 10, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Doc: I guess my situation is common but let me ask what you think any way. I am a 42 year old woman that has been dating a 50 year old man for 4 years now, we have been living together for 2 years now and we’re both divorced. When we met I was very clear what I wanted and he seemed ...
Views: 3298 - How to Get One Night Stands - by Submitted on Aug 29, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Dennis! I like this girl but she says she’s not ready for a serious relationship right now and wants to be by herself for a while. I’m respecting that and just being her friend right now. I want to really enjoy my youth as much as I can and I don’t want anything serious with anyone but her ...
Views: 3119 - How to Handle the Silent Treatment - by Submitted on Nov 30, 2005 from Dr. Dennis NederLet’s say that you’ve dated a girl a few times and all of a sudden, she stops picking up the phone or returning your calls when she was very responsive before. What do you do? First, you stop pouting and sitting by the phone trying to will her to call by sending your aura through the telephone ...
Views: 2958 - Avoiding Dating Games - by Submitted on Feb 04, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Dr. Neder: My problem is that I don’t want to play the dating game and I don’t know how to avoid it. I’m not interested in the type of relationship that’s a sort of fragile peace treaty after a war of conquest. When I consider what’s involved in the dating ...
Views: 2873 - 10 Unethical Ways to Date More - by Submitted on Jan 27, 2012 from Dr. Dennis NederYou’re a nice guy or nice girl. You have morals and ethics. You want to do everything above-board and you play by the rules. The problem is, you’re getting nowhere with your dating/sex/relationship life! You look around you and see guys and girls that seem to be bending (or breaking) the ...
Views: 2728 - How To Buy A Date From A Co-Worker - by Submitted on Nov 28, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Doc: I like this girl at work. Our work is not related but we work in the same office. She is 12 years younger than me and I hold a senior position. Knowing all the stuff about sexual harassment all I did for the last 7-8 months was just look at her. She would look back and we would just ...
Views: 2141 - Why Do Women Love Men? - by Submitted on Apr 08, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc, I have a question: why are women attracted to men (and not to each other)? I know what attracts me to women, women are beautiful and soft but I wonder what’s in women's brains that make them see men as more attractive than women? I can’t imagine my self kissing another man but why ...
Views: 2097 - The Rules of Fidelity - by Submitted on Jul 12, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederDoctor Neder: I am in a serious relationship of almost a year. We have one major problem that continues to come up. When we were first dating, we'd been out maybe a dozen times and slept together maybe 6 times, had no conversations about being exclusive and at a party I was intimate with ...
Views: 2063 - She's No Longer Interested? - by Submitted on Mar 19, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc! There’s a girl that I’ve been interested in and we do the whole flirting thing all the time and some of it gets a little physical. I finally worked up the courage to ask her out and when I did she said that she liked me when she first met me but she doesn’t ...
Views: 2024 - Which Guys Are “Marriage Material”? - by Submitted on Apr 22, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederDr. Dennis: What are some signs that a man is "marriage material" and that a woman should definitely consider pursuing him seriously? =================== Hello! One of the best signs is to check the ring finger of his left hand (at least here in the States); if there's a wedding band there, ...
Views: 1996 - Habitual Dating Self-Sabotage - by Submitted on Jul 28, 2005 from Dr. Dennis NederHabitual Self-Sabotage Hi Dr. Neder! Whenever I might meet a woman and things look good, like we're talking pleasantly, (and this is right at the first or second meeting) all of a sudden I start to feel "self-conscious". I can explain exactly what I mean by this: it is the exact same feeling ...
Views: 1993(5 votes) - Keeping Him Satisfied and Interested - by Submitted on Dec 02, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Neder: I just recently became involved with a fellow six years my senior. He is everything I have ever dreamt of; there is just one problem….Me! I have always avoided the relationship scene because, frankly, I have no idea how to handle a relationship. I didn’t actually date until ...
Views: 1910(2 votes) - How Much is Sex “Worth”? - by Submitted on Jun 20, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Neder: I’m 23 years old and I met this guy (25) about 6 months ago and we really hit it off. He’s absolutely perfect! We got along great and started dating and things turned physical pretty quickly. I’ve decided to wait until I’m married before I’ll have sex but we made out and ...
Views: 1881 - How to Date – Back to Basics - by Submitted on Jul 15, 2010 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Dr. Dennis – Hi and thank you for your help! I am single and I have been for 2 years. I’m a 30-year old woman with 2 part-time kids. I am attractive (though somewhat overweight), intelligent and I like to think I'm good company. Recently, I have had some pretty bad luck in re-entering ...
Views: 1784(4 votes) - Help! My World is Crumbling! - by Submitted on Apr 01, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederDoc: I met a girl that has been hurt by a lot of guys in her past and I asked her out but I got turned down because she said she wanted to face her studies squarely. She came back home on Christmas break and I asked her again and we were so close to getting together, but then, she found out I ...
Views: 1750 - Nice Girl Finishes Last - by Submitted on Jul 27, 2011 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Dennis: I’m hearing a lot about “nice guys” who consider traveling to other countries to meet foreign woman because they feel unappreciated by American women who tend to be more fascinated by “bad boys”, wealthy guys, etc. Being a “nice girl” I feel stuck in a similar dilemma, in ...
Views: 1745 - The Six “R’s” for Getting Your Ex Back - by Submitted on Nov 13, 2011 from Dr. Dennis NederEven a broken watch is right twice a day, and yes, many people DO get their ex's back. The real question you should be asking however is "should you?" Nature plays this glorious trick on each of us. When we break up with someone, we're angry and hurt, we feel loss and helplessness. We have a ...
Views: 1732 - On Being a Man - by Submitted on Jul 08, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc! I just want to say thanks for helping to transform me into a better man than I was! Growing up, I had a dad that was often not available due to work. He and my mother would frequently get into fights with him screaming and yelling (he never hit my mother however) but my limited time ...
Views: 1704 - Going Too Fast, Going Too Slow - by Submitted on Feb 25, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Neder, What's a good way to enter into a sexual relationship so that you don't go too fast or too slow? Sometimes if the guy goes too fast it can be really threatening to the woman (unless she likes it of course.) Hello! This is an excellent question! The key is to not try to ...
Views: 1674(1 vote) - What You Bring to the Table - by Submitted on Jan 12, 2013 from Dr. Dennis NederDuring the very first or second date with a new woman, I like to ask a simple question: “What do you bring to the table?” I love that question! I also love hearing it from someone I just met. Some people take offense to it assuming I should “just know” and “how dare I not know!” That’s ...
Views: 1669 - Men Won’t Approach Me! - by Submitted on Sep 14, 2005 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Neder: I am an African female who has very short hair and for these reasons, I feel that men are intimidated by me. I am 5'0 feet tall and very petite with a voluptuous body. Aside from my looks however, my speaking abilities are very polished and I also major in Math and Computer ...
Views: 1657 - Maybe I Can Just Bore Her Into Liking Me? - by Submitted on Jul 28, 2010 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc! First off, I'm 21 and I stay near a pretty small town that’s big enough for a WalMart but the only "mall" in town has maybe 8 stores in it. Yeah, it’s THAT small. I got a girl's number a while back. We've only had maybe two real conversations during the last semester of college: ...
Views: 1655(4 votes) - Attraction and Love Formulas - by Submitted on Jun 10, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederI’ve been promoting a new concept on my show that has been very successful in explaining how attraction and love work. I call these them (collectively) “The Formula”. Is there really a “formula” for attraction and love? Yes, there is. I discovered them when I was working on what sorts of ...
Views: 1646(3 votes) - Find What Makes You Happy - by Submitted on May 31, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederHi I recently came across your article on “sabotaging relationships” through an Internet search and I really found it helpful. I’m writing to you because of my current situation. I am 31 years old and have grown up in a very religious community. Everything is judged superficially; family, ...
Views: 1621 - Giving it the Old College Try - by Submitted on May 05, 2010 from Dr. Dennis NederI'm a 19 year old guy studying at college in the UK and there is a girl who I've seen around, mainly in the library. I would like to approach her but have no clue what to say and I'm afraid she might laugh at me for trying to speak to her. I have no confidence and I'm afraid the girl has noticed ...
Views: 1594 - Relationship Death by Honesty - by Submitted on Nov 18, 2011 from Dr. Dennis NederYour mother told you “always tell the truth”. When you testify in court, you are sworn to tell only the truth. Your partner expects total and complete honesty. Here’s the problem: you’re a liar. I know this without even knowing you. The fact, hard and cold as it may be, is that we are all ...
Views: 1577 - Confused About Playing “Hard to Get” - by Submitted on May 07, 2011 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Doc! A few days ago I asked you about playing hard to get and you told me to read your article on your website "Dumb Games, and the Girls That Play Them". In it you said it’s a terrible idea, but I have experienced that when we get things easily we lose interest. That’s a fact right? So ...
Views: 1561 - The Harsh Reality - She's a Prostitute! - by Submitted on Aug 10, 2005 from Dr. Dennis NederDr Neder, I read on a website that you try to answer your email and I'm begging for some of your expert advice please. I am in serous need of some help because a girl I had really strong feelings for and with whom I've had a very close relationship and I have just had a crisis. About 1 1/2 ...
Views: 1499(1 vote) - Trying to Reconcile - by Submitted on Jun 24, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Doc! My girlfriend and I broke up about 5 weeks ago. I’m 22 and we have been dating 3 years - on and off for 5. She broke up with me because of the way I was treating her, I was being a pretty bad boyfriend. So, after 5 weeks we had a talk and she was willing to open her heart for me to come ...
Views: 1438 - The Deserving Dame - by Submitted on Oct 09, 2011 from Dr. Dennis NederHello Dr. Dennis, Where can I find a financially stable guy that is willing to commit? I live in New York and I'm 28 years old. My love life completely stinks. I keep getting my heart broken. I've always dated guys who were either commitment-phobic, game players, liars or weren't well ...
Views: 1421(1 vote) - How to Get Women to Be Attracted - by Submitted on Apr 21, 2010 from Dr. Dennis NederDoc: I came to notice early in my life that treating women as if they are a goddess is a sure fire way of losing their interest. You can try to spend as much with them as possible, call/text them every day, give them compliments etc. but they will lose interest and think you’re ...
Views: 1418(8 votes) - Christmas Day Dump - by Submitted on Dec 30, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederDoc: I was with my girlfriend for 9 weeks before we split on Christmas day! Everything was perfect we loved each other had talked about holiday and kids and even where we were going to get married and moving in together but the problem I had was I never thought I was good enough for her so I ...
Views: 1375(1 vote) - Rebounds and Responsibilities - by Submitted on Jun 17, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Dr. Neder, I met a girl (21yrs old) a little while ago, and have been going go out with her for 2 months. I now sense that she was on the rebound from another relationship; emotionally hurt and confused, but she does not make it clear to me that she is. This is affecting my relationship ...
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