NO Second Chance to Make a First Impression / Online Marketing

NO Second Chance to Make a First Impression / Online Marketing

Thirty four years of working with professional sales people has opened up my eyes and mind to what separates the really good ones from the average performers, which seemingly are the majority of them.

In analyzing barriers to personal growth and development, I find that the first and one of the most important steps in the overall sales process is the first meeting of the two parties. These online business ideas and information related to personal growth opportunities are designed to help you in developing your personal growth plan.

It does not matter if you are meeting a business acquaintance for the first time, or possibly your new boss, a new member of your team, or a potential client you want to add to your account base.

From the first moment that a stranger sees you or you see them, your individual brains make a thousand computations and go through a mental gymnastics exercise to determine how to react to them. Do you or they see someone to approach or to avoid? Do they or you see a friend or foe?

Is there status and authority supporting their position? Do they look trustworthy, competent, likeable, and confident?
Keep in mind these computations are made at lightning speed in the brain’s synapses and cortex, making major decisions about one another in less than ten seconds of meeting for that first time. Does that mean that this is infallible? No, as impressions of one another will change with time, but we are talking about that first meeting when all you have to go on is the look and impression conveyed when going through the meeting ritual,; saying hi, shaking hands, saying even a few words and sentences.

When building business relationships, those first impressions are crucial. Humans by nature make snap decisions, as the human brain is hardwired this way on purpose as a prehistoric survival mechanism. It becomes easier to understand how to make those decisions work in your favor the more you work and practice the skills being outlined by this article.

Surprisingly, first impressions are more heavily influenced by nonverbal cues than verbal cues or the spoken word. In fact, many studies have found that nonverbal cues have over four times the impact on the impression being made than anything being said by either party.

I am going to share a non-verbal method that will help you make a positive first impression. These suggestions start out with the way you should be approaching the meeting mentally, the others are more physical aspects of the method and follow how your mind and body feel at that critical moment.

Key to all of the points being shared is the Disposition of your attitude. Your attitude is a direct reflection of your sub-conscious mind. Look at your sub-conscious mind as a file room of every sight, sound, taste, feel, and experiences gathered and accumulated over your lifetime. If you were raised with positive values, more than likely you think and act the part. On the other hand if all you ever got as a youngster was a constant barrage of how dumb and stupid you were, these foundation building experiences will impact your adult life, more than likely in a negative fashion. The great thing is that we can re-program old thinking, allowing us to follow our chosen path on our terms. Your attitude is hard to hide and comes across as a barometer of your sub-conscious file room’s personality. Are you the one that sees a clear glass of water half full or half empty? This simple example exemplifies the behavior presented by either a positive or negative attitude. We want to be seen as positive and can “fake” this behavior, but ultimately will revert back to our true self once the guard is down. The sub-conscious mind is approximately eighty eight percent of your total mind. This means that the conscious mind is only about twelve percent of the total and will always lose to the sub-conscious in your automatic daily behavior. As you enter a situation where you are meeting someone new, are entering an important meeting, or making a presentation; make a conscious effort and choice about the attitude you want to present and have reviewed by the other party.

The next point to consider is to Present a positive physical posture. Status and power are nonverbally conveyed by your height and space. Simple ideas such as stand tall, keep your shoulders pulled back, chest out, and head straight are all positive signs of confidence and competence. Look at any U.S. Marine. They exemplify this suggested behavior. People will always follow a leader that exhibits these qualities and as stated, non-verbal cues impact the decision quicker and deeper than verbal ones. Your posture says a lot about the person. Confidence is exhibited by standing tall, by stretching your body to its greatest length and holding the pose throughout the conversation. Your confidence value goes down when standing in a slouchy fashion, as if you had the world’s worries in your shoulders. As we age, the tendency of the human body is to let gravity take over and accept whatever the outcome may be. Bottom line, your posture does convey the confidence level of the person and a person with a straight posture will be viewed more positive than one that does not. Work on this recommendation more so as age takes over, as time is not our best friend.

It cannot be stated strongly enough to Smile as much as possible. A strong natural smile opens the door to inviting the other person into your world with a blinking welcome sign saying “I’m friendly and accessible.” Smiling is actually a good muscular exercise for your facial muscles, as these are the only muscles on your body that are not attached to bone. That is why a person’s face”falls” with age. By smiling as much as possible versus frowning, your facial muscles in turn remember to keep everything taut and tight. Your smile actually affects all of your facial muscles and is great at keeping them in tone and in a more youthful presentation. It is a lot easier to open the door to a great conversation with someone that is smiling versus the grumpy, frowning face of someone that obviously is not happy with themselves or the rest of the world.

It cannot be said enough to Make direct eye contact with the other person. It is said that a person’s eyes are the windows to their soul and how could we look in if the person never established the eye contact necessary to see them? Eyes transmit energy in both positive and negative states and indicate a person’s interest and openness. When engaged in a conversation, if we are not mentally committed to looking into the other party’s eyes, we are left to guessing what they are thinking and possibly losing key moments to reach our desired and expected result. By looking directly at the person’s eyes, we have a greater chance of ascertaining what the thought process is throughout the conversation. By sharing eye contact, both parties are allowing all cues and signals to be stepping stones to further agreement and eventually reaching an agreement on the subject.

In communication training it is taught that in a two way exchange, the words used by the parties are the weakest and lowest level of what will be remembered after leaving the conversation. Words are only seven percent of the total remembered. That is why they say “A picture says a thousand words.” and “It is not what you say, but how you say it.” that impacts more than just the words.

What people remember in a two way exchange more than the words are the voice’s tone and tonality. These account for thirty eight percent of the total. Think about people on the phone. Who do you remember the most, someone that has good control of their pace and tone, someone that uses their voice to accent the meaning of the words, or someone with a monotone voice that almost puts you to sleep?

And last the most powerful of the three areas of human communication, Body Communication. This area of communication skills accounts for fifty five percent of the total remembered and responded to in the conversation. Unless you have taken the initiative and gone through some communications training on your own, more than likely you were never taught these principles in school. It is stated in many publications that the body has the ability to send out over seven thousand cues and clues throughout the conversation. Think about someone that you are trying to sell to and they step back and cross their arms. What does that tell you? In most cases if you observed the two cues in alignment, more than likely you are being told subconsciously that they are not interested. That leads me into another body communication sign to look for while conversing.

Look for Raised eyebrows. These raised brows simulate the “eyebrow flash” that is a universal signal of recognition and acknowledgement. Most of these body communication cues have to be learned unless you have had formal training in the art of communication. Be cognizant of what cues the other person is sharing with you as they converse and you will be surprised at how much you can learn by just practicing the art of being aware. In a business conversation, where you are trying to get the other party to buy into what you are presenting, it is critical to become the student until you have mastered the basics of this developing discipline.

As simple as it sounds, Shaking hands is a great opportunity to physically make our mark upon the other party. We have all shaken hands with people that had clammy, wet hands. What kind of impression did they make upon you? Not a good one, I am willing to bet, yet it makes the point. A good business hand shake is crisp and firm. It embodies professionalism and a confident stance. Weak handshakes are almost as bad as the clammy ones and both need an update. Nothing turns someone off quicker than the message given by their less than firm handshake. It is a critical step in the business process and one of the quickest ways to establish rapport between the parties. Studies continue to show it takes an average of three hours of continuous interaction to develop the same level of rapport that you can get with a single handshake. Use it to your advantage.

My last suggestion utilizing the solid principles of body communication is to Lean in slightly to the other person. This movement shows you are engaged and interested in what they have to say. Remember to be mindful of the other person’s personal bubble, which in our society is roughly a two foot circle around the person. You will know when you have crossed this barrier, as they will physically step back and way to reconfirm their position. We never know what the other person is thinking unless they give us feedback. This could be an exchange of words in response to your statements, a sharp rise in their tone or even cues and clues given by their body. Make it a habit to observe and study this discipline, as the more you are able to take advantage of these basic suggestions, the closer you will come to creating the end result desired and expected.
Keep in mind that we make quick snap judgments of others in less than ten seconds on a first meeting and the other party is in the same position. Take control of this situation and utilize the science and art form of communication basics that are proven winners when used properly.

James Hobart, an industry leader in the Professional Beauty Industry for more than 40 years at every level, has certification in hypnotherapy. His insight and experience have helped many companies and individuals with their growth and development over the years. His book, Happiness Is Your Birthright, supports his philosophy on life and is a practical handbook to create positive change throughout one’s life.