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Articles from Tina Tessina | Selfgrowth.com
- Dr. Romance on Giving Thanks - by Submitted on Nov 30, 2014 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance wishes you a Happy Thanksgiving! A lot of people aren’t very good at looking at the positive. I hear a lot of negativity, blaming and complaining daily in my counseling office, and I find the more negative people are, the worse their lives work. Talking about how bad it all is seems ...
Views: 1183 - Dear Dr. Romance: I have lost the umph for even planning the wedding - by Submitted on Aug 11, 2015 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I heard you on "How to Stay Happily Married" podcast. I am getting married in June to someone I know for 3 years and lived with. He is now deployed in the Army and has been since last May. This is my 3rd marriage and I feel like my eyes are wide open now and I know ...
Views: 1180(2 votes) - Dr. Romance on The Right Way to Love - by Submitted on May 10, 2015 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance writes: There’s a pervasive myth in our society that there is a right and a wrong way to love. However, there’s not much clarity about what the right might be. We all have difficulty with relationships and difficulty with love. Therefore, we’re liable to draw the uncomfortable ...
Views: 1180 - Dr. Romance on The State of the Union Meeting - by Submitted on Sep 05, 2015 from Tina TessinaDr Romance recommends couples increase their mutual respect and appreciation by having a regular "State of the Union" meeting. Here are two simple techniques you can use in all kinds of relationships: couples, families, even work partners and friends, to enhance your cooperation, ...
Views: 1177(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: My son is having a substance abuse problem - by Submitted on Jan 04, 2019 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: My son is having a substance abuse problem. It surfaced a few months ago, he promised to stop, and I just caught him using it again. He just turned 18. What can I do to help him? Dear Reader: I'm so sorry you're going through this with your son. ...
Views: 1174(1 vote) - Dr. Romance asks: Are the Post-Holiday Blues getting you down? - by Submitted on Jan 26, 2015 from Tina TessinaEveryone is relieved when the holidays are over, and sometimes disappointed. If you're worn out, it's worth your while to take the time to recharge a little, and pamper yourself. Dr. Romance gives 4 Tips for handling Post-holiday blues * If you are disappointed, and the ...
Views: 1174 - Dear Dr. Romance: They said "Go help somebody, you selfish jerk." - by Submitted on Dec 17, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I am an addict. long term. I've had some time in NA running what I thought, and what others even so much reinforced, that when I began to feel like I needed to "leave the nest" a little (at about five years sobriety), I copped all kinds of flack from ...
Views: 1173(1 vote) - Creating Family Acceptance - by Submitted on Jan 25, 2015 from Tina TessinaLately, I’ve gotten so many anguished questions from people who are being criticized and rejected by family for making relationship choices the families don’t like, usually for cultural or religious reasons, that I changed my mind about what I was going to write this month. ...
Views: 1172(2 votes) - Dr. Romance on Silver and Gold: secrets to making and keeping friends - by Submitted on Feb 27, 2015 from Tina TessinaMake new friends, keep the old. One is silver, the other is gold.——adage Research conducted by Dr. Dean Ornish and others shows that the happiest and healthiest people are those who are well-connected to friends and family. But, in our mobile society, keeping friends is not always possible. ...
Views: 1172 - Dear Dr. Romance: Is Facebook romance hopeless? - by Submitted on Sep 28, 2015 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I am in an unusual situation. I was speaking to a random person on Facebook one time. We became Facebook “friends”, and we kept chatting back and forth on e-mail. This girl was already dating someone (not very happy though), but I guess she kind of ...
Views: 1168(2 votes) - Dear Dr. Romance: Is Facebook romance hopeless? - by Submitted on Sep 28, 2015 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I am in an unusual situation. I was speaking to a random person on Facebook one time. We became Facebook “friends”, and we kept chatting back and forth on e-mail. This girl was already dating someone (not very happy though), but I guess she kind of ...
Views: 1168(2 votes) - Dear Dr. Romance: She makes me feel like I'm worthless - by Submitted on Sep 20, 2017 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I was reading an article that you have written and it caught my attention. im in an relationship where the lady is older then me. it started of great then six months later its like reality hit hard, i love this lady so much she makes me feel like i dont have a care in the ...
Views: 1168(1 vote) - Creating Holiday Magic - by Submitted on Dec 21, 2014 from Tina TessinaRecently, as we were eating in an Italian restaurant, the music being played transported me back to holidays with my Italian/American family. Traditional, sentimental Italian songs were such a large part of our gatherings for the holidays. After a huge, slow, multi-course dinner, Uncle Tommy ...
Views: 1165 - Dear Dr. Romance: Do you feel that she is wanting out and doesn't want to tell me or hurt me? - by Submitted on Oct 30, 2017 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance:I have a question for you. I normally don't ask questions like this. But I was looking at your Facebook page and reading some of your responses. Here goes. I have been with this female for almost 1 year. I really love her a lot. The last month things have changed. We don't ...
Views: 1165 - Dear Dr. Romance: let the small things go and don't pick each other apart - by Submitted on Apr 26, 2011 from Tina TessinaDear Dr Romance: I just wanted to say thank you for the article you wrote "Dating 101: Do Opposites Attract?" I just read it today and you have really made my day. I'm currently in an interracial relationship with a wonderful man from Africa. Not only are we from different races but he is ...
Views: 1165 - Creating Connections: Draw Them In - by Submitted on Nov 30, 2014 from Tina TessinaMany years ago, an Edwin Markham poem inspired me, and I’ve tried to live by it Outwitted by Edwin Markham He drew a circle that shut me out — Heretic, rebel, a thing to flout. But Love and I had the wit to win: We drew a ...
Views: 1163 - Dear Dr. Romance: I've always been asked out - by Submitted on May 30, 2016 from Tina TessinaDear Dr Romance : I just read about you and some articles you wrote about Age Differences in Relationships and really enjoyed what you had to say and how you said it. I now have a question: I am 49 years old and very attractive. I look ...
Views: 1162(2 votes) - Resolving Inner Anarchy - by Submitted on Feb 09, 2015 from Tina TessinaRecent events have me thinking about political anarchy—riots, bombings, civil wars, threats, and other bad and dangerous behavior around the world. Politically, anarchy means obeying no laws. It’s frightening to watch a mob take over. Anarchy is the result of two things: repression ...
Views: 1162 - Dear Dr. Romance: She runs my life like a prison - by Submitted on Oct 29, 2015 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I'm in my early twenties. I got to this country a few years ago from the mideast. I met this lady that was in her thirties, we dated for a couple years then she offered to marry me to improve my immigrant status. I used to ...
Views: 1157 - Dear Dr. Romance: Should I say something? - by Submitted on Nov 28, 2017 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: Should I say something? I'm reaching out to you for advice, I came across your blog recently and wanted to see what you had to offer. I'm kind of in a weird situation, I'm interested in this girl that I work with, we have great chemistry and make each other laugh non-stop, we ...
Views: 1157(1 vote) - Dr. Romance on The Worrier’s Guidelines: simple steps to combat worry - by Submitted on Mar 16, 2015 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance writes: Often, it seems that there are not enough hours in the day to do everything that must be done, and like the Red Queen in Alice in Wonderland we have to run as fast as we can just to stay in place. And she was created before computers, cell phones and e-mail! ...
Views: 1157 - Dr. Romance's Seven Steps to Help You Learn Patience - by Submitted on Oct 23, 2017 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance Writes: Frequently, life can become very busy and stressful. Delayed gratification, or patience, is a skill many of my clients need to learn when life feels overwhelming or difficult; but it isn't always easy, because it requires patience. Learning to be ...
Views: 1156 - Dear Dr. Romance: I am a Native American woman who has been abused and betrayed - by Submitted on Oct 30, 2020 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I am a native American woman who has been abused and betrayed by my husband. He was my coresearcher and advisor for several ...
Views: 1155(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I want to break-up with him, but I don't know how - by Submitted on Feb 08, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I have been dating my boyfriend for seven years, I care for him deeply. However, I am not happy. I want to break-up with him, but I don't know the best way to do it and not hurt him. I would still like to remain friends with him, or is this just wishful thinking? Dear ...
Views: 1155(1 vote) - The Fine Art of "Squirrel Hunting" - by Submitted on May 24, 2011 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance writes: The most frequent problem I hear from single clients is that of how and where to search for a partner. Other clients are searching for friends. Many of them have been searching for a long time, without success; others have been afraid to go out and search at all. Most of ...
Views: 1154(1 vote) - Turning Poison Into Medicine - by Submitted on Jul 13, 2015 from Tina TessinaThe revered Sufi poet, Rumi, wrote: “We turn poison into medicine and our sorrows into blessings” I’m thankful for many things. I live a wonderful life, surrounded by loving friends and my beloved husband, Richard; I have the privilege of doing ...
Views: 1154(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: He can't forgive me - by Submitted on Sep 28, 2015 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance : I am a 20 year old college student. I have been going out with a man for almost 2 years, I feel he is the one I want to marry but now we are having problems and I don't know how we are going to stay together. I made the mistake of telling him about my ...
Views: 1153(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: Help me find Mr. Right - by Submitted on Apr 02, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr Romance, I am hard of hearing, and I have hard time finding Mr. Right. I grew up around hearing guys but I haven't often dated. My first marriage was to a hearing guy and I taught him sign language so we did fine for a short time; but he didn't ...
Views: 1153(1 vote) - Self-Control: Who’s in Charge Here? - by Submitted on Oct 13, 2014 from Tina TessinaWant to be powerful in your relationships? Learn emotional self-control. Learning to take charge of your emotions means you can’t be “set off” by someone else. You control your reactions, they don’t control you. When you’re too reactive to your partner, he or she ...
Views: 1151 - Getting Out of Your Way - by Submitted on Mar 16, 2015 from Tina TessinaRecently, I wrote here about making the most of time. This month, I have been asked a lot about how people can overcome paralysis and self-sabotage, so I thought I’d pass on my ideas on the subject. Getting in your own way is all about how you relate your yourself. In addition to not ...
Views: 1150 - Dear Dr. Romance: I am a substance abuse counselor - by Submitted on Jul 13, 2015 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I work at an Indian health clinic in northern California. I am a substance abuse counselor, or Certified Addiction Treatment Counselor . After scanning a book I found on a colleague's bookshelf called The Real Thirteenth Step I felt compelled to seek it out, and I ...
Views: 1149(2 votes) - Dr. Romance: You Are a Gift - by Submitted on Mar 23, 2015 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance writes: Each of us is individual, special and different for a reason: You are a gift to the planet. Anthropology tells us we are different because we survive better that way – the recombining of genes in sexual reproduction makes us a stronger species than cloning would. However, ...
Views: 1149 - Dr. Romance on Patterns of Change - by Submitted on Jul 02, 2016 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance writes: I’ve been dealing with a lot of unwanted changes, and it’s not easy. Losses, disappointments, changes – we all struggle when life doesn’t go our way. Why is it so hard to handle change? Then there are the changes we want to make, fight hard to make – losing weight, ...
Views: 1148(2 votes) - Dear Dr. Romance: I have been feeling lonely since high school - by Submitted on May 18, 2016 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I am 23 years old. I have been feeling lonely since high school and recently, its been getting worse. I feel like I can't have really close relationships with women and yet that is what I crave most right now. I recently cut off a friendship of 5 years because my ...
Views: 1146 - Dear Dr. Romance: I want my wife and family back. - by Submitted on Sep 29, 2017 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I saw your article "The One Who Got Away " about getting back together with your ex. Can this really happen? My wife is divorcing me because she has fallen out of love with me. We aren't divorced yet but are in the process by going to a mediator. It's something I do ...
Views: 1142(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: How can I resume my initial romance with my wife? - by Submitted on Jan 04, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I am a male Kenyan, married with 2 daughter. Of late, have totally lost urge for sex and it can only appear once per week though a weak one. Outside affair is a norm in my religion, but whenever I site a beautiful lady suddenly the mind switches to sex and I go to an extent of ...
Views: 1141(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I haven't spoken to my maternal grandparents in 5 years - by Submitted on Jul 23, 2016 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I'm not sure if you're willing or able to help, but I've been looking online for a solution to my problem for a while now. As of yet, I've come up empty handed. My situation is that I'm 21 years old and haven't spoken to my maternal grandparents ...
Views: 1141(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I'm wondering about a "blind date" - by Submitted on Jul 12, 2016 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I have been reading your article "The Fine Art of Squirrel Hunting". I certainly will appreciate any wisdom or guidance that you can share. I'm a minister who ministers to congregations, and I was widowed several years ago. 1. I've pretty much ...
Views: 1141(2 votes) - Dear Dr. Romance: It is sad that I cannot stop loving him - by Submitted on Oct 15, 2015 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I told my husband that if he cannot be with me as his wife and does not give me the place that a wife should have that I wanted to go on with my life and file the papers. He stopped seeing the other woman for a weekend. Then, on the Thursday that followed, he called me ...
Views: 1140(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: It's as if something turned out bad - by Submitted on Apr 22, 2015 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I have a friend who's asking for an advice and accidentally, I saw in the Internet your advices to some heart problems. So I told myself to try ask help from you also. This lady friend of mine is well, kind of in love with a man who's also in love with her. ...
Views: 1140(2 votes) - Dear Dr. Romance: he is still stuck in his bad habits - by Submitted on Oct 25, 2015 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I recently read most of your book, It Ends With You: Grow Up and Out of Dysfunction and loved it. I work at a center where in talking to our clients, we have found repeated patterns of dysfunction (generational), over and over and over again, so your ...
Views: 1133(2 votes) - Dr. Romance on Your Job on Earth - by Submitted on Apr 26, 2011 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance writes: It's easy to get discouraged when we become aware of the suffering throughout the world: natural disasters; racial prejudice; addiction and self-destruction; political oppression in its many forms (starvation, war, torture, misinformation, imprisonment, denial of rights ...
Views: 1133(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I have no support structure - by Submitted on May 22, 2016 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I am 48 years of age, never married but would definitely like to. I am doing the online dating thing for a while now and so far no success. I am currently speaking to a gentleman who lives in another state; but given he is currently a pilot he ...
Views: 1132(1 vote) - Getting Along With Each Other - by Submitted on Feb 23, 2015 from Tina TessinaIn 1998, Richard and I had a marvelous opportunity to sail around the world as the ballroom dance teachers on a cruise ship. Many of the places we saw then, such as Oman, Jordan, Turkey, Morocco, Indonesia and Israel are in turmoil now, and not as safe for tourists. Last year, when ...
Views: 1132 - Dear Dr. Romance: I cannot compete with a dead man - by Submitted on Jan 19, 2011 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I'm a sixty something divorced man, I have not had a relationship for a long time. Last year, I met a wonderful lady from Colombia, who is a little bit younger, well educated and has a green card here. She has taken me out of my lonelines and made me feel alive again. Her ...
Views: 1131 - Dear Dr. Romance: Should I give up on her? - by Submitted on Jul 28, 2015 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance A question for you: I have a female friend that I dated for 7 months - she dumped me - and is, I think, dating some other guy. The question is: I have tried to ask her for 5 or 6 different events - and have gotten turned down for each one - with some excuse - the excuse sounds ...
Views: 1128(2 votes) - Zen + Sex = Starting Over? - by Submitted on Oct 18, 2015 from Tina TessinaMen and women have to redefine themselves after a relationship ends, and reinvent their lives. If they do it well, it can lead to the most satisfying and successful years they've had. Dating successfully after divorce or a breakup require several steps to recover from the ...
Views: 1128(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: He gave me a major concussion - by Submitted on May 18, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance:I found your site on an internet search. I am in an abusive relationship and am financially dependent on him. I have made him leave several times, only to take him back because of monies. He is an ex cop. I have phoned the authorities many times, they ...
Views: 1127(1 vote) - Dr. Romance on The Worrier’s Guidelines: simple steps to combat worry - by Submitted on Mar 16, 2015 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance writes: Often, it seems that there are not enough hours in the day to do everything that must be done, and like the Red Queen in Alice in Wonderland we have to run as fast as we can just to stay in place. And she was created before computers, cell phones and e-mail! ...
Views: 1127 - Dr. Romance on Coping with Critics - by Submitted on Oct 16, 2017 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance writes: No one likes to be criticized, fairly or not. It’s always difficult to deal with, and it can hurt. Because I’m a writer of books and columns, and because I’ve lectured, appeared on radio and TV, I am sometimes recognized in public. I’m glad ...
Views: 1125 - Dear Dr. Romance: I dont know what bipolar is but I wonder about him. - by Submitted on Jan 12, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I have been dating a guy for 3 years now. He still lives at home with his parents he is very polite we go to church together. He bought our rings last year and we were going to get married this year. I cancelled for this year. I dont know what bipolar is but i wonder ...
Views: 1121(1 vote)