Dear Dr. Romance:

Your article on "Fair Fight Guidelines" is wonderful!!!  My major issue is that I cry upon a disagreement. This prevents me to think clearly, act maturely and interact directly. Would you please address this issue?

Dear Reader:

Thank you for the compliment. I'm glad you liked the article. Crying on disagreement is probably something you learned as a small child -- it most likely prevented people from being harsh with you.  However, you've seen it doesn't work very well in adult life.  "Comforting the Little  Orphan Girl" will help you understand the source of your tears.  It Ends With You: Grow Up and Out of Dysfunction  has specific exercises which will help you be more in charge of your feelings, so you can remain in adult mode when under stress. Best of luck with your relationship.

It Ends With You

For low-cost counseling, email me at

Author's Bio: 

Tina B. Tessina, Ph.D. is a licensed psychotherapist in S. California since 1978 with over 30 years experience in counseling individuals and couples and author of 13 books in 17 languages, including It Ends With You: Grow Up and Out of Dysfunction; The Unofficial Guide to Dating Again; Money, Sex and Kids: Stop Fighting About the Three Things That Can Ruin Your Marriage, The Commuter Marriage, and her newest, Love Styles: How to Celebrate Your Differences. She writes the “Dr. Romance” blog, and the “Happiness Tips from Tina” email newsletter.

Dr. Tessina, is CRO (Chief Romance Officer) for, a website designed to strengthen relationships and guide couples through the various stages of their relationship with personalized tips, courses, and online couples counseling. Online, she’s known as “Dr. Romance” Dr. Tessina appears frequently on radio, and such TV shows as “Oprah”, “Larry King Live” and ABC News.