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Articles from Dr. Dennis Neder | Selfgrowth.com
- Is it Just “Clingy” or Something Else? - by Submitted on May 06, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Doc: I am 20 and the longest I have been in a relationship is 10 months, but I have noticed a pattern in all of the girls I have dated. When I first meet them, they seem to be head over heels for me, they seem to love my charm, since of humor and look and things go okay for about a month ...
Views: 1314 - Is it Time to Move in Together? - by Submitted on Jan 18, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Neder: This seems silly to me, but I am always in favor of a second opinion. My boyfriend of 1 ½ years and I are considering moving in together. Well, I suggested it and now it is on the table. You hit the nail on the head with your articles ...
Views: 856 - Is She Just a Habit - by Submitted on Dec 14, 2005 from Dr. Dennis NederYou and she are a couple and have been dating for awhile. You’ve fallen into a pattern that seems comfortable and even safe. Sure, you fight once in a while, but you have fun too. The only problem is that you’re bored and you’re wondering what else you’re missing out there. It’s easy to fall ...
Views: 810 - It’s the Choices You Make Now - by Submitted on Apr 26, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Dr. Neder! I am 18 years old and just about to graduate high school. My girlfriend and I have been together for about 14 months now and I am not sure what to do after high school. My parents are going to provide us with an apartment but should I move in with her? I was reading your 10 ways ...
Views: 911 - I’m a Snoop! - by Submitted on Jun 13, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederHello – This is questions requires some background information. My ex-boyfriend and I just broke up about a month ago after a two-year relationship because he got into medical school 7 hours from home, and I can’t move because I had accepted a really great job. We decided that long distance ...
Views: 1144 - I’m No Longer His “Dream” - by Submitted on Nov 22, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederHi, Dr. Dennis I am a 34 year old woman who is insanely attracted (you could even say devoted) to a 56 year old man who still makes me melt after almost 4 years of knowing him. We have seen photos of each other, but our only contact has been via e-mail and telephone – never in person. I met ...
Views: 822 - Just How Does A Guy Meet A Girl, Anyway? - by Submitted on Jul 26, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederHello Doc: I've never really known much of anything about dating. I'm 26 years old and I've never had a serious relationship. I feel like I've missed out on a lot of knowledge over the years and I feel like I'm sunk. Where can I go to meet people? How do I introduce myself when I find ...
Views: 881 - Just Never Satisfied! - by Submitted on Dec 17, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Dr. Neder, I am a 24 year-old med student and cannot find the right woman. I have been told I'm a handsome and outgoing, and my women friends always tell me I'm a catch. I've been involved with a couple women that logically seem like the type I'd like to get involved with, but I never ...
Views: 764 - Keeping My Boyfriend Sexually Attracted - by Submitted on Jun 27, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederDr. Neder: I read one of your articles about how to keep my boyfriend interested in me sexually. You said to try to change things up but honestly I feel like I just want to be myself because if he fell in love with who I am then why should I change just for him to show interest in me again? He ...
Views: 709 - Learning From the Past - by Submitted on May 09, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc, I'm writing to you again not because I'm in a jam, but because I want to learn from a previous relationship. My girlfriend broke up with me 2 months ago. It was cold-hearted and all of a sudden. We dated for 4 months and were so glad to have found each other. Nonetheless, after ...
Views: 660 - Learning to Climax During Intercourse - by Submitted on Apr 23, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr Neder I have a sexual problem. I enjoy having sex, but it seems I never reach orgasm. It's really bothering me because I can reach orgasm only by stimulating the clitoris, but when I am having sex with my boyfriend it just doesn't happen. Could you tell me what can I ...
Views: 835 - Learning To Communicate - by Submitted on Jan 02, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Dennis, I need some help on communication. I have trouble with communication. For some reason I am just not effective at communicating; especially with women. I really just don't know how to communicate effectively. I've heard that the key to communication is to listen, ask questions about ...
Views: 621 - Lost Without a Trace - by Submitted on Aug 01, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederGood Morning --- I really enjoy reading your website! I would like to know, why do men sometimes just cut you off (no communication) when they are dealing with their problems. Long story short, I met someone last April --- things started out great, but then I found out he had been separated ...
Views: 702 - Lying is Bad – Um-Kay? - by Submitted on Apr 04, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederDoc: I met my girlfriend online and we've been together for about 3 months (we’re both in our 30’s.) When we first started going out, I was dating another girl from online too. I was not attracted to this other girl romantically but thought she could be a friend. The problem is I lied to my ...
Views: 805 - Many, Many Mixed Signals - by Submitted on Sep 10, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederHi, I first met this guy through mutual friends about 2 months ago. The second time we all hung out during 4th of July in which case, he instantly showed me interest and invited me to another party. We flirted heavily and had a good time until 4 am. When we parted he invited me to hang out with ...
Views: 687 - Maybe He’ll Be Mine if I Get Pregnant? - by Submitted on Apr 15, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Doc! Here is my situation: I am dating a guy who I am in love with. We started seeing each other in November 2008 but in February he told me we should break it off because he's not ready for anything serious as he is going through a divorce. He said he needs time to find himself. After that ...
Views: 1209 - Me, Her and the Ex - by Submitted on Jul 22, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Doc, I've liked this girl for between 3-4 months. Initially when I got to know her, she was really nice and we were really close. We used to message and talk almost every day. For example, there was once when she went overseas and I told her I would miss her. She said “awww…” and that I ...
Views: 1221 - Meeting Women in a Book or Music Shop - by Submitted on May 02, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederHello Doc - Is a bookshop or a music shop a good place to ask women out? If so, how do you start a conversation? Wouldn't it be strange? You see, I haven't met anyone that great through friends or at bars and clubs. I also wanted to know what to do when either you or she is with a group of ...
Views: 732 - Men are Dumb Too! - by Submitted on Jul 25, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederLast week’s article focused on how women can be dumb (or at least, do dumb things) in relationships. It’s not that men are dumb, but we also do a bunch of dumb things – I see them everyday! Here are the top ten: 1) Becoming the “friend” Almost everyone fears rejection, especially; so it would ...
Views: 789 - Men Won’t Approach Me! - by Submitted on Sep 14, 2005 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Neder: I am an African female who has very short hair and for these reasons, I feel that men are intimidated by me. I am 5'0 feet tall and very petite with a voluptuous body. Aside from my looks however, my speaking abilities are very polished and I also major in Math and Computer ...
Views: 1657 - Moving On and Knowing That You’ve Moved On - by Submitted on May 17, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederI really am in need of some real help I am a 19 year old man Last year I moved away from my first love who I dated for a year. I don't believe that I ever got over her. I went through a great deal of pain and grieved so much but I’m finding it tough to move on. I don’t understand how a person ...
Views: 861 - My Boyfriend Doesn't Like My Father - by Submitted on Apr 02, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederHello! Thank you so much for your time and attention. I have been living with my boyfriend for about 8 months now. He doesn’t like my father as according to him "my view of men is distorted by the secretive way he (my father) acts towards my mother". According to him my insecurities and ...
Views: 703 - My Girlfriend is a Liar! - by Submitted on May 27, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederIt started as white lies at first about small things then on to more serious things. She is not a very good liar and exposes herself with inconsistent stories and I’m just about fed up. For instance, she was talking to a few guys before me, and lies about them not calling her. There are a more ...
Views: 5827 - My Neighbor’s Hot – And She Knows It! - by Submitted on Dec 06, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc: I've had a few girlfriends in the past and have no problems with experience. I don’t think I’m God's gift to women, but I’m not particularly ugly either. I've fallen for a neighbor girl. I'm not shy to talk to her, but she's just perfect. She's a very nice person, but thinks quite a ...
Views: 4737 - My Parents Don't Like My Partner! - by Submitted on Feb 06, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederHello! I have a fairly serious issue regarding my parents and my relationship with my boyfriend. I am 22 years old and I live completely on my own, however, my parents still give me problems about my boyfriend. My boyfriend and I have been dating for over 3 years. I love him very much and he ...
Views: 548 - Nice Girl Finishes Last - by Submitted on Jul 27, 2011 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Dennis: I’m hearing a lot about “nice guys” who consider traveling to other countries to meet foreign woman because they feel unappreciated by American women who tend to be more fascinated by “bad boys”, wealthy guys, etc. Being a “nice girl” I feel stuck in a similar dilemma, in ...
Views: 1745 - On Being a Man - by Submitted on Jul 08, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc! I just want to say thanks for helping to transform me into a better man than I was! Growing up, I had a dad that was often not available due to work. He and my mother would frequently get into fights with him screaming and yelling (he never hit my mother however) but my limited time ...
Views: 1705 - Open(ing) Relationships - by Submitted on Aug 13, 2013 from Dr. Dennis NederHello Dr. Dennis! My girlfriend (2 years of a wonderful relationship) and I have been talking about an “open relationship” where we both could find other sex partners but stay together as a couple. We’re both enthusiastic about it but I wanted to get your take. Is this a good idea? Will it ...
Views: 1333 - Oral Sex - by Submitted on Feb 27, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederHello Doc, I’m sure you've been asked this question before. My girlfriend does not want to perform oral sex on me. Is there a way I can get her to change her mind? I mean, ever since the day she told me, I've been fine with it. I told her I had no problem with it. And she doesn’t ...
Views: 749 - Physically Close, Emotionally Distant - by Submitted on Nov 02, 2005 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Neder, I read your answer on 'Trust' on the Internet and I hope you can help me. I am engaged to be married this December. The problem is I feel that my fiancé is not emotionally available to me during love making. I know she has been emotionally hurt by her past boyfriend seven ...
Views: 993 - Pre-Qualifying a Woman’s Digits - by Submitted on Aug 08, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Dr. Neder, I LOVE your books! They really helped me and this letter is an example of what I’ve learned. I was walking out of this building on campus and by chance I see this girl walking next to me. Every one around was wearing kind of uniform for orientation and I thought that would be a ...
Views: 635 - Rebounds and Responsibilities - by Submitted on Jun 17, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Dr. Neder, I met a girl (21yrs old) a little while ago, and have been going go out with her for 2 months. I now sense that she was on the rebound from another relationship; emotionally hurt and confused, but she does not make it clear to me that she is. This is affecting my relationship ...
Views: 1372 - Relationship Death by Honesty - by Submitted on Nov 18, 2011 from Dr. Dennis NederYour mother told you “always tell the truth”. When you testify in court, you are sworn to tell only the truth. Your partner expects total and complete honesty. Here’s the problem: you’re a liar. I know this without even knowing you. The fact, hard and cold as it may be, is that we are all ...
Views: 1577 - Sabotaging Your Relationship - by Submitted on Aug 15, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Neder: I came across your website as I was searching for “sabotaging relationships”. My "boyfriend" (of 3 intense months) has brought up that term for the third time. We are challenged by distance as he lives about an hour away from me. He works 6 days a week at a very intense job in a ...
Views: 768 - Seth Rogan – Male Role Model? - by Submitted on Oct 01, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederMaybe you’d be surprised at the number of letter I get from women that begin, “I recently met this really cute guy…” and end with “How do I get him to ask me out?” And then again, maybe you wouldn’t; particularly if you’re a woman. It seems that today’s man is all but devoid of basic manly ...
Views: 1172 - Sex or More? - by Submitted on Nov 11, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederHi, There's this guy at work that I've really hit it off with. We've been flirting lots but have also chatted lots and I started falling for him and thought he felt the same. We'd been texting and the other night we'd both been drinking, him out with his mates, me at home. When he got back into ...
Views: 742 - Sexless Relationship, Missing Boyfriend - by Submitted on Jun 28, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dennis, I met this incredible guy 6 months ago. He and I have much in common; we both work two jobs and I have two small children. Needless to say, our time is limited. We have not had sex yet because, (mostly by his request), we wanted to really get to know each other first instead of ...
Views: 1035 - Sexual Stigma, Labels and Morality - by Submitted on Mar 04, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Neder, How come in the old days women were considered sluts and freaks if they enjoyed having sex or watching porn? How come the girl had to stay a virgin until marriage but no one cared about the guy? Is it because men needed to know their wife was pregnant with their baby and no one ...
Views: 1175 - Sexually Frustrated - by Submitted on Nov 07, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederHi Dennis, I am a college sophomore and diabetic and I'm in a relationship with a freshman. I am a virgin but my girlfriend is not. I've told her that I'm not bothered by what happened in her past. We've tried to have sex on two occasions. The first time I was extremely drunk and we both ...
Views: 944 - She's No Longer Interested? - by Submitted on Mar 19, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc! There’s a girl that I’ve been interested in and we do the whole flirting thing all the time and some of it gets a little physical. I finally worked up the courage to ask her out and when I did she said that she liked me when she first met me but she doesn’t ...
Views: 2024 - Should I Call to Confirm a Date? - by Submitted on May 03, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Dr. Dennis! I get this a lot - I get a phone number from a girl, call, try and set a date and the chick says something like, "Yeah Thursday sounds good. I may have a girlfriend coming into town so let's play it by ear. Give me a call Thursday." Basically, it's her way of saying... "Maybe, ...
Views: 1246 - Should I Contact Her Again? - by Submitted on Oct 17, 2007 from Dr. Dennis NederHi, So a week ago I met this girl. She was an old high school friend of a new student in my department that I don't know well yet. Anyway, I had a great time chatting with this girl. We had lived in/traveled to similar places, had similar complaints about the local traffic, and so on. It seemed ...
Views: 834 - Should I Give Up Relationships To Have A Career? - by Submitted on Jan 16, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederHello Dennis: I recently started a graduate (doctorate) program where I have to keep a 3.5 GPA or else I will get kicked out. It's kind of a conditional thing...err sort of. So no guarantees I'm going to get my doctorate. You know what I mean. Also you can’t get any C, D, or F grades. So ...
Views: 540 - Should I Stay or Should I Go? - by Submitted on Jan 21, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Neder: My boyfriend and I have only been dating a year and 2 months. I do really care for him and I pray he cares for me as well. Here is my concern, he has hidden things from me before, and I have found out and now I'm getting afraid he is doing it again. He has promised me that he ...
Views: 658 - Strong Women, Submissive Women - by Submitted on Dec 07, 2005 from Dr. Dennis NederDo you know a sexy, strong woman at your place of work? Perhaps she’s a manager or business owner. Maybe she’s a salesperson that works with your company or she represents a vendor. Do you want to know a little secret about her? She’s very likely demure and submissive in the bedroom! What’s ...
Views: 3557 - Stuck Between a Friendship and Something More - by Submitted on Aug 05, 2009 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Doc: I've known this girl for about a year now and I like her a lot. To cut a long story short, I've lost her twice now because of my lack of confidence which stops her from seeing me as more than a friend. She knows I'm interested and we almost had something but I pushed her away ...
Views: 3313 - Talk is Cheap – Learn to Do It Right! - by Submitted on Jul 19, 2006 from Dr. Dennis NederDear Dr. Neder, I saw your articles on the Internet and was hoping that you would give me some advice. My ex-boyfriend broke up with me almost five months ago. He and I were friends for a few years before we dated, and we dated for about 11 months. What bothered him most (as far as he would ...
Views: 839 - That Damn Ticking Clock - by Submitted on Aug 20, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederDr. Dennis, So I am about to turn 33. I’m financially stable and have a great career. But when it comes to dating I don't feel like I’ve found the "1" so I am starting to think about having a baby on my own... scary. I know it's not the ideal idea. Trust me, I imagined having met Mr. Amazing ...
Views: 716 - That Summer Fling - by Submitted on Aug 13, 2013 from Dr. Dennis NederI’ve always loved summer. I love the hot weather, the parties, all the skin… One of the things I love most about summer is the “summer fling”; you know, that chance to hook up with someone to go enjoy the season – and sex – with you? It might be just a week (like when you’re on vacation) ...
Views: 1302 - The "Date Canceller" and other Feminine Games - by Submitted on Jun 11, 2008 from Dr. Dennis NederHey Doc! I've noticed a trend in my dating life that is really starting to piss me off. It's rare for me to make plans with a girl and to not have her try to cancel on me or suddenly be "too busy" to keep our date. I'm so tired of games like that. Are they trying to see how much I want them or ...
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