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Articles from Dr. Anne Brown | Selfgrowth.com
- What Is Narcissistic Personality Disorder? Join Us For A *FREE LIVE* Telephone Interview | 8/16/2017 at 8PM CST - by Submitted on Aug 10, 2017 from Dr. Anne BrownJoin Us For A Queen Adventures Signature Ladies Night ! Topic: A Date With Danger Are you single and dating? Do you think you could be in a relationship with a narcissist or married to one? Do you have a daughter or young woman in your life that you want to love and protect? If the ...
Views: 4166 - How To Beat a Sociopath at His Own Dating Game! - by Submitted on Aug 18, 2015 from Dr. Anne BrownRemember Sociopaths are opportunists and you are at risk for being that opportunity for him. I need five commitments from you if you want to avoid the wake of destruction that comes from dating a Sociopath. 1. Commitment to your Heart: Healing a broken heart takes time in pain and sorrow. ...
Views: 2902 - How to Get the Best Out of Your 12-Step Meeting! - by Submitted on Sep 14, 2016 from Dr. Anne BrownAttending a support group can be a very positive part of your recovery plan, as long as you understand what is healthy and what is dysfunctional. Let’s look at a few qualities of support groups and what happens when things get out of balance… Similarities vs Enmeshment When I join a support ...
Views: 2293(1 vote) - Common Sense Tools for the Friend of Someone Who is Brainwashed! - by Submitted on Apr 20, 2017 from Dr. Anne BrownMost of us know or have known someone we care about who has come under the influence of a perpetrator using him/her for self-serving purposes. Very smart, educated, healthy people can, for some unknown, reason come under the spell of opportunistic, toxic, and insecure people. It is very ...
Views: 2164 - Why is Giving Up People Pleasing So Difficult? - by Submitted on Nov 06, 2016 from Dr. Anne BrownThis question fascinates me because I have observed over many years many journeys where people struggle with this task (myself included.) Let’s take a look at some of my speculations and see what your thoughts might be on why this is so challenging. Our History and Teachings For women, it is ...
Views: 1988(2 votes) - The Female Bully and the Codependent: “A Smelly Turd in a Pretty Package” - by Submitted on May 09, 2018 from Dr. Anne BrownPhysical/aggressive bullying is easy to identify. We can all see the broken bones, blood, and bruises. This type of bullying is most often chosen by men. As a therapist, it is usually pretty easy for me to ask certain questions to get the information that physical abuse is indeed happening. ...
Views: 1980(1 vote) - Healing From Betrayal - by Submitted on Feb 16, 2018 from Dr. Anne BrownLet’s look at the definition of betrayal so we can understand why it hurts so much. Webster’s definition: To hurt (someone who trusts you, such as a friend or relative) by not giving help or by doing something morally wrong. “The saddest thing about betrayal is that it never comes from ...
Views: 1945(1 vote) - Anne Brown: Backbone Power The Science of Saying No | Books on Integrity |Books on Making Decisions |Books on decision making |Books on Codependency. Kindle Edition - by Submitted on Jul 04, 2018 from Dr. Anne BrownA No Nonsense approach to Making Decisions. A Self Help Guide to having Backbone and Integrity in all your choices, short term and long term. Is this decision going to be good for Me? To help Me be successful? How do I make the right choices? What are the effects and the outcomes. Ask ...
Views: 1943(1 vote) - How Saying NO, Having a Backbone, and Being Your Authentic Self Can Help You Become Successful? - by Submitted on Jan 25, 2018 from Dr. Anne BrownIs this decision going to be good for Me? To help Me be successful? How do I make the right choices? What are the effects and the outcomes. Ask yourself, Who am I really making these choices for? Backbone Power was written to help everyone from mothers, to college grads, to people that have ...
Views: 1921(1 vote) - The Female Bully and the Codependent Part II: “A Smelly Turd in a Pretty Package” - by Submitted on May 18, 2018 from Dr. Anne BrownIn Part One, we discussed some characteristics of the serial female family bully, the way she bullies, her targets and her end game. We looked at some interesting characteristics also seen with the codependent; poor self-esteem and inability to speak her truth or express her anger. In Part ...
Views: 1846(1 vote) - 6 Things I Wish I Knew Then That I Know Now After My Divorce (by: Dr. Anne Brown PhD, RN) | DivorceForce - by Submitted on Apr 27, 2016 from Dr. Anne BrownWe always hear people say, "I wish I knew then what I know now," so here is some help if you are navigating a divorce now ... 1.Believe in Yourself! Three words that are so powerful they can change any "I can't into "I can". When you hear the words "I want a divorce", there will be times ...
Views: 1809(1 vote) - Is it Love or Codependency? - by Submitted on Nov 06, 2016 from Dr. Anne BrownHow do I know if I am acting codependent or loving? This is an excellent question and often confusing for many for different reasons. Let’s look at the definitions of codependent and loving and see what we find. Love: An intense feeling of deep affection. For the purpose of this article, we ...
Views: 1763(1 vote) - Common Sense Ways to Stay Friends With a Victim - by Submitted on Apr 20, 2017 from Dr. Anne BrownAre you frustrated with someone you care about who appears to be the victim of a perpetrator? Do you find yourself getting angry for this person? We all have examples of these situations and we often struggle with what to say, how much time to spend with the victim, and how to continue being ...
Views: 1754(1 vote) - Codependency - by Submitted on Jan 30, 2018 from Dr. Anne BrownA No Nonsense approach to Making Decisions. A Self Help Guide to having Backbone and Integrity in all your choices, short term and long term. Is this decision going to be good for Me? To help Me be successful? How do I make the right choices? What are the effects and the outcomes. Ask ...
Views: 1741(1 vote) - Narcissistic Abuse | Betrayal | Divorce | Codependency | People Pleasing | Authenticity | Backbone - by Submitted on Mar 26, 2018 from Dr. Anne BrownHave you been a victim or do you know someone who's a victim of Narcissistic Abuse and Betrayal? Are you getting a Divorce? Do you want to learn more about Codependency and People Pleasing? Learn why havingAuthenticity and Backbone will help you. Be among the first to see my newest blog ...
Views: 1735(1 vote) - Backbone Power | Newsletter Sign Up - by Submitted on Jun 18, 2018 from Dr. Anne BrownSUBSCRIBE TO GET THE LATEST BLOG POSTS, NEWS, & MORE UPDATES FROM DR. ANNE BROWN. http://backbonepower.com/newsletter-signup Dr. Anne Brown, PhD, RN of Sausalito, California, formerly from Aspen, Colorado in her private practice has served as the trusted advocate and advisor to Influential ...
Views: 1661(1 vote) - Bullying and The Codependent Part IV: “The Smelly Turd in the Pretty Package” - by Submitted on Aug 28, 2018 from Dr. Anne BrownI assess bullying as a form of abuse. Our first child abuse laws had many starts and stops; they did not really gain traction until the 1970’s. These laws addressed physical and sexual abuse, not emotional abuse. Church and State enabled abuse and the paradigm that women and children were ...
Views: 1648(1 vote) - How to Heal from a Relationship with a Narcissist! - by Submitted on Jul 24, 2019 from Dr. Anne Brown“Sometimes, you find yourself in the middle of nowhere, and sometimes, in the middle of nowhere, you find yourself.” In our article about Leaving a Narcissist, I spoke about knowledge being your best weapon. Only with knowledge about what is happening, how it is happening, and how to counter ...
Views: 1616(2 votes) - 6 Tools for Resiliency in Recovery - by Submitted on Jun 16, 2016 from Dr. Anne BrownResiliency and Recovery have a nice ring. The two R’s! Having a backbone makes this process a lot easier. Resiliency is having the ability to adapt in the face of adversity. The more you know yourself, the greater your self-awareness, and the greater your backbone, the greater your chance ...
Views: 1599(1 vote) - Bullying and the Codependent Part III: “The Smelly Turd in the Pretty Package” - by Submitted on Aug 28, 2018 from Dr. Anne BrownEven though it is interesting to note that recent reports state female workplace bullying is on the increase, causing more people to say they would rather work for a man, we are going to stay focused on the female family serial bully. I believe bullies know they are bullying. I believe you ...
Views: 1582(1 vote) - I know of no more encouraging fact than the unquestionable ability of man to elevate his life by conscious endeavor. ~Henry David Thoreau - by Submitted on Mar 19, 2014 from Dr. Anne BrownKeep making those Requests Making requests may seem like such a simple thing. Of course I do that you say to yourself. Check again it can be the root of many negative emotions especially resentment. I have a friend of many years who as a teenager was experimenting with a rocket that exploded ...
Views: 1568(1 vote) - What Our Athletes Can Teach Us About Recovery! - by Submitted on Sep 29, 2016 from Dr. Anne BrownThis summer in particular, we had some pretty spectacular athletic competitions in England, France, and more recently, Rio. Whether you follow cycling, tennis or any of the competitions that took place in Rio, it is hard not to be inspired and learn from some of the stories. Stories and ...
Views: 1561(1 vote) - DRAMA - by Submitted on Apr 17, 2014 from Dr. Anne Brown“Being honest may not get you a lot of friends and it will get you the right ones.” We all have been there! Maybe you had a friend or you know someone now who is in a big DRAMA! The situation keeps getting worse and you can’t believe the stories… affairs, lying, addictions, bills not paid, ...
Views: 1535(1 vote) - Guidelines for Determining a Toxic Relationships - by Submitted on Jul 24, 2019 from Dr. Anne BrownShould I leave my relationship? This question is probably one of the top ten reasons people have come into my practice asking for help. I am a therapist who prefers to work preventatively. I would like someone who is in the market for a relationship to already be in therapy. A good therapist can ...
Views: 1508(2 votes) - Strong Leaders need Strong Minds! - by Submitted on Jun 16, 2014 from Dr. Anne Brown(We all need Strong Minds!) "Unless you try to do something beyond what you have mastered you will never grow." Ralph Waldo Emerson The most important asset one can have is a strong mind. Forget all the material things many think are so important and would be lost without; a strong mind is ...
Views: 1507(1 vote) - Backbone Power - by Submitted on May 27, 2014 from Dr. Anne Brown"If you don't stand for something you will fall for anything." Gordon A Eadie Why do I need a backbone? I just have my simple little life. I don't aspire to be famous. Hmmm! Everyone's simple little life is going to be given an opportunity to take a stand for something, someone, some ...
Views: 1476(2 votes) - Divorce Support: A Curse or a Blessing? (by: Dr. Anne Brown, PhD, RN) - by Submitted on May 02, 2016 from Dr. Anne BrownIt really is up to you every day whether you see divorce support as a curse or a blessing! Whether you are the giver or the receiver, I recommend you reframe it as a blessing. Is this easy? Of course not! However, if you actually go through the trauma of getting divorced and you stay married ...
Views: 1469(1 vote) - 5 Ways to Avoid Court at all Costs! (by: Anne Brown PhD, RN) - by Submitted on May 12, 2016 from Dr. Anne BrownDivorce can be ugly. Courts can make it uglier. I think we are all in agreement "settle out of court". How can a couple do that when they are fighting to the extent they are filing for divorce? You are probably going to get tired of hearing me say first always "Fight for your Marriage." 1. ...
Views: 1468(1 vote) - The Insidious Killer in Recovery! | Dr. Anne Brown | Recovery.org - by Submitted on May 25, 2016 from Dr. Anne BrownLiving without a backbone sets you up for severe consequences in the domains of health, finances, career, friendships, romance, recovery and your dignity for starters. What does this mean? How can this be? It means you don’t know how to advocate for yourself and even worse you have insidious ...
Views: 1457(1 vote) - Strong Minds Accept No Graciously - by Submitted on Jun 10, 2014 from Dr. Anne Brown"What we fear doing most is usually what we most need to do." Tim Ferriss How did we become a society that cannot hear the word No? Why are we so sensitive to being told No? There is yes and there is No, there is night and day, dark and light, yin and yang, and on and on. So to be balanced ...
Views: 1455(1 vote) - Sex and Codependents: What Could Possibly Go Wrong? - by Submitted on May 01, 2017 from Dr. Anne BrownSo many women I interviewed when writing my book reported saying yes to sex just to get the sex over with and have the person go away. Others reported saying yes to sex to have the person like them. Others reported gaining weight so they wouldn’t have to say no to dating and sex. Many reported ...
Views: 1444(1 vote) - My Spouse has Borderline Personality Disorder! by Anne Brown, Author Backbone Power - by Submitted on Oct 17, 2019 from Dr. Anne BrownWhen your spouse has borderline personality disorder (BP), whether it’s a sudden realization or a long-known fact, it can be challenging. Those in relationships with BP individuals may be subject to unique forms of manipulation or toxicity. Recognizing these habits of the BP is the first step to ...
Views: 1431(1 vote) - Codependency and Narcissists: What Could Possibly Go Wrong? (Part I) - by Submitted on Oct 10, 2019 from Dr. Anne BrownFor this discussion, we are going to stick with our understanding of codependency as a system of distortions that exists on a continuum. Codependents learn personality traits that interfere with knowing one’s self and others. The people-pleasing aspect of codependency might drive the ignoring of ...
Views: 1426(1 vote) - Robin Williams - by Submitted on Aug 19, 2014 from Dr. Anne Brown"There are wounds that never show on the body that are deeper and more hurtful than anything that bleeds." Laurell K Hamilton Mistral's Kiss From the outside looking in, it is easy to say, but he had so much why couldn't he find the help he needed. From the inside looking out, a lot of the ...
Views: 1412(1 vote) - 5 Signs You Are in an Abusive Marriage (by: Dr. Anne Brown PhD, RN) - by Submitted on May 02, 2016 from Dr. Anne BrownAre you controlled or in a partnership? Abusive marriages come in different forms. Most people are quick to think of "physical abuse" but there are definitely other acts of abuse that detriment the wellbeing of individuals at the hands of their domestic partner. 1. Physical Abuse In ...
Views: 1408(1 vote) - Prepare for Divorce (by: Dr. Anne Brown PhD, RN) | DivorceForce - by Submitted on Mar 31, 2016 from Dr. Anne BrownDivorce with dignity! Be committed to be on the healing in two years not five year track! Children want to be normal again, not kids of those divorcing parents who are always fighting. Believe in yourself and what the future holds! Lean into the divorce, move through one step at a time, don't ...
Views: 1397 - Codependency and #MeToo: A New Way Forward - by Submitted on Jul 24, 2019 from Dr. Anne BrownRecap So, to recap Part One, we discussed our history as women as it relates to our relationship with men and how up until the middle to late 20th century we didn’t have laws to protect us from abuses. Women, along with children, were property of men. Men could abuse us with no consequences. We ...
Views: 1390(1 vote) - Preparing for Divorce in the Face of Emotional Abuse! (by: Dr. Anne Brown RNCS) - by Submitted on May 19, 2017 from Dr. Anne BrownThe History For years women and children have been considered to be property of men. There were laws enabling men to punish their wives physically. By the 1920’s all states had made “wife beating” illegal, however it has only been since the 1970’s the courts have treated it as a serious crime ...
Views: 1380(1 vote) - Codependency and #MeToo: A Brief History of Abuse - by Submitted on Jul 24, 2019 from Dr. Anne BrownOur History When we look at the history of women as it relates to men, we see that it has only been in the last 100 years that we were given rights. Before we had rights, women and children were the property of men. Men could do with us whatever they pleased, whenever they pleased. This ...
Views: 1379(1 vote) - Juicy Relationship For Couples: Rules For Creating And Keeping It - by Submitted on Aug 10, 2016 from Dr. Anne BrownI could write on and on about what you can do, should do, must do, and could do. We have all been frustrated with and in our relationships especially regarding a juicy relationship for couples. I had one of my students write me an entire letter the other day on all the ways she hated everything ...
Views: 1379(1 vote) - Say No to Waffling!!! - by Submitted on Apr 01, 2014 from Dr. Anne Brown“It comes from saying No to 1000 things to make sure we don’t get on the wrong track or try to do to much.” Steve Jobs Are you beginning to see where we need our tools, ability to say No, ability to make requests, ability to speak our truth in order be a good leader, and in order to be able ...
Views: 1375(2 votes) - Surviving Your Divorce when the Courts are New to Emotional Abuse! (by: Dr. Anne Brown RNCS) - by Submitted on May 19, 2017 from Dr. Anne BrownPrepare to Fight When one person only wants to control and sabotage during the divorce, mediation is usually not an option and a waste of money. I have seen victims of emotional abuse in their marriage be victims of mediation because they are the only person bringing adult behavior to the ...
Views: 1366(1 vote) - Breaking Up is Hard to Do!! - by Submitted on Jul 24, 2014 from Dr. Anne Brown(A simple way to let go with dignity) "The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread." Mother Teresa If schools had offered a course called "Breaking up is hard to do", I suspect we all would have enrolled. Why aren't we taught these difficult challenges ...
Views: 1366(1 vote) - How The Moon Centers Can Turn A Woman's Life Around - by Submitted on Aug 10, 2016 from Dr. Anne BrownMoon Centers. Let’s face it, many women have out-of-control emotions—huge emotional swings that they often blame on PMS, SMS, MPS—whatever! Some people would say it’s easier to just let the emotions rule. Wrong. As a woman, I’m sure that you’d welcome knowing that there are ways other than ...
Views: 1363(1 vote) - ABUSE!! And what would you do?? - by Submitted on May 20, 2014 from Dr. Anne BrownThe Grand Jury file on reports filed against Sandusky in the Penn State Sex abuse scandal illustrates some of the most egregious rationalizing (right up there with the Catholic Church's sexual abuse of children) in our country. There are some people involved who attempted to do the right thing ...
Views: 1352(1 vote) - How To Heal From A Borderline Spouse - by Submitted on Nov 04, 2019 from Dr. Anne BrownStay or Leave? When I wrote about healing from the Narcissist, I used the paradigm that the spouse had physically left the marriage. Today we are going to address physically staying or leaving but always with the goal of emotionally leaving the emotional abuse of the spouse with borderline ...
Views: 1342(1 vote) - In America You Are Allowed To Say NO! - by Submitted on Jun 03, 2014 from Dr. Anne Brown"Two things define you; your patience when you have nothing, and your attitude when you have everything." In my article on March 2, 2014 and chapter two in my book Backbone Power The Science of Saying No, I speak about the importance of being able to say No when you mean No. After listening ...
Views: 1330(1 vote) - Domestic Abuse - by Submitted on May 08, 2014 from Dr. Anne Brown"Never make yourself feel like nothing, to make someone else feel like everything!" Rationalizing has to be prevalent when there is Domestic Abuse because how else could you convince yourself to stay. First you have to recognize that you are being emotionally, physically and or sexually ...
Views: 1325(1 vote) - How to Leave A Narcissist! - by Submitted on Jul 24, 2019 from Dr. Anne Brown“Stop Asking why they keep doing it and start asking why you keep allowing it.” ~Charles J. Orlando Today we are going to address leaving a narcissist emotionally and physically. Many people feel they cannot leave physically because of logistical concerns (e.g. money, no support system, ...
Views: 1322(1 vote) - Reinventing the Concepts of Recovery - by Submitted on Aug 17, 2016 from Dr. Anne BrownWouldn’t it be great if we could wave our magic wand and no one would relapse? Until we understand more about addictions (and we have work to do there), we will have to tackle relapse in other ways. Let’s look at a couple of possible breakdowns that might lead to relapse and find some ways to ...
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