Self Improvement Site
On The Internet! Take the Self Improvement Tour
On The Internet! Take the Self Improvement Tour
Articles from Tina Tessina | Selfgrowth.com
- The Power of Purpose - by Submitted on Jun 14, 2014 from Tina Tessina“Whatever your age, if you learn to listen, your inner voice will speak to you about your path,” writes oncologist Dr. Bernie Siegel in Peace, Love and Healing, your ‘job on earth.’ This wisdom that is directing you from within is your birthright... an inner message, an ...
Views: 1523 - The Freedom of Maturity - by Submitted on Jun 09, 2014 from Tina TessinaAnd then, not expecting it, you become middle-aged…You achieve a wonderful freedom. It is a positive thing. —Doris Lessing Maturity or middle age means different things to different people, but for most, reaching a mature age means developing a new set of ...
Views: 1305(2 votes) - Autonomy vs Dependency - by Submitted on Jun 07, 2014 from Tina TessinaSelf-determination and self-respect are the necessary keys to take full responsibility for and control over your own life. Without these keys, it’s easy to be caught up in the fantasy that there is someone else who will make it better, who can or should take total care of you, ...
Views: 1865 - Dear Dr. Romance: We just had a small fight, but she doesn't want to talk - by Submitted on Jun 06, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: My best friend isn't talkin with me since 2 months now. I'm frustrated. We are best friends since 3 yrs now. In feb suddenly she stopped talking. We just had a small fight as in regular nothing serious. When i asked she said she doesnt want to talk anything for ...
Views: 2044 - Dr. Romance on Love Styles: How to Celebrate Your Differences - by Submitted on Jun 02, 2014 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance writes: It was one of those magical encounters with a personal truth—you know how it feels. I was fifteen, in ninth-grade English. The teacher, Mr. Rizzutto, read us a poem, and it had such a profound effect on me that even five decades later, I’m still using it as a guide. The ...
Views: 1632 - Detox Your Life - by Submitted on May 31, 2014 from Tina TessinaMany of my clients come in with complaints about personal habits that feel toxic in their lives. Just as you can detox your body when you’re feeling sluggish, it’s also possible to detox your emotional life. Here are some of the most common ways your life can back up on you, and how ...
Views: 1335 - Dear Dr. Romance: She is verbally abusive to me - by Submitted on May 29, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I am a retired police officer who found his wife sneaking around with another man 3 years ago. We have 3 kids. I cook and clean and up all night doing laundry 3 to 4 nights a week. I work two jobs to support my kids and family. I love my wife and forgave ...
Views: 1449 - Dear Dr. Romance: He isn't shy about holding hands with a black girl - by Submitted on May 26, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I started dating a man 2 years younger than me, who is from another country. I thought he was very sweet and gentlemanly and of course I'm really attracted to him, and he eventually asked me on a date. We've had several dates, and he's very considerate, very ...
Views: 1678 - Dr. Romance on The Perks of Dating a Divorced Person - by Submitted on May 24, 2014 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance asks: Should you date someone who is divorced? Does it mean the person can't commit or trashes relaitonships? It's possible that those things are true, but let's look on the positive side. What are the perks of people who have already been through ...
Views: 2001 - Dear Dr. Romance: I want to find myself - by Submitted on May 23, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I was married at the age of 21, was married for 7 years, separated from my spouse a little over a year ago, and I'm in the process of divorce. I dated various people shortly after separation, but I was lost, broke some hearts, and simply didn't know ...
Views: 1687(2 votes) - Family Violence Q&A - by Submitted on May 19, 2014 from Tina TessinaQ: My spouse and I often have arguments over the “small stuff.” How do we get past this so that we are not constantly bickering? A: I’ll bet neither of you would argue with your boss or work colleagues, or your children’s teachers the way you argue with ...
Views: 1420 - Turn on Your Charm - by Submitted on May 16, 2014 from Tina TessinaEver wondered how con artists can get away with all they do? They know how to charm people, and they have mastered the art of looking as if they belong. Because they have no feelings of guilt about misrepresenting themselves, they can pull it off. But you don’t have to be dishonest and ...
Views: 1685 - How To Write A Love Letter - by Submitted on May 15, 2014 from Tina TessinaWriting has a powerful effect on our emotional state. The following exercise is designed to help you fully express feelings that may have lain dormant for a long time, or may be too intense and jumbled for your to process effectively. You’ll find it helpful in expressing what you feel, ...
Views: 1467 - The Right Way to Love - by Submitted on May 14, 2014 from Tina TessinaThere’s a pervasive myth in our society that there is a right and a wrong way to love. However, there’s not much clarity about what the right might be. We all have difficulty with relationships and difficulty with love. Therefore, we’re liable to draw the uncomfortable ...
Views: 1443 - Romance is Not Necessarily Love - by Submitted on May 09, 2014 from Tina TessinaIn romantic depictions of love, cute little images of cherubs and cupids abound. But Cupid, in his real incarnation, is not so sweet and cuddly. His arrows can create deep and lasting wounds, and can strike you blind and irrational in a heartbeat. A few disaster-filled run-ins with Cupid’s ...
Views: 1381 - Dear Dr. Romance: Though we slept together while his wife was away, I regretted it - by Submitted on May 08, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I am a woman in my mid-twenties from India and working in the middle east in a professional job. I had a brief arranged marriage and am now getting divorced. One of my business clients, who is an arab and over forty has been married for many years but claims his ...
Views: 1367 - Patterns of Change - by Submitted on May 05, 2014 from Tina TessinaI’ve been dealing with a lot of unwanted changes, and it’s not easy. Losses, disappointments, changes—we all struggle when life doesn’t go our way. Why is it so hard to handle change? Then there are the changes we want to make, fight hard to make—losing weight, giving ...
Views: 1285 - Your Bestest Friend – You - by Submitted on May 04, 2014 from Tina TessinaI have a friend, Maggie, who has been my friend since 1968, and she calls me her “bestest” friend as a way of appreciating our connection. It always makes me smile, and I feel the same about her. Often, my clients have trouble learning to appreciate and trust themselves, and I think ...
Views: 1656(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: It is your Christian duty to forgive - by Submitted on May 01, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: Thank you for your article on "Apology and Forgiveness". The process of forgiving is powerful and extremely helpful. I have searched for such information many years and have truly believed that forgiveness is not something you just do. ...
Views: 1419 - Dear Dr. Romance: How do we reorder our brain for positive motivation? - by Submitted on Apr 28, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I read your article "Motivation And How to Create It (Good Boss/Bad Boss)" and found it very interesting. I understand your point about celebrating and appreciating yourself to motivate your inner potential. However I am confused about how to order my brain for ...
Views: 1313 - Growing Up as an Adult - by Submitted on Apr 27, 2014 from Tina Tessina“Miracles do happen,” wrote Chaim Weizman , the first President of Israel “but one has to work very hard for them.” To grow up and out of a painful, dysfunctional past and all its leftovers—feelings, memories, pain, confusion, anger, fear, and persistent ...
Views: 1637 - Dear Dr. Romance: I am a married man infatuated with a coworker half my age - by Submitted on Apr 27, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I am a happily married man in my mid-forties with 2 small kids who has become overwhelmingly infatuated with a 22 year old co-worker. She is friendly but certainly not coquettish and there is no suggestion she reciprocates. I have no intention of trying to pursue ...
Views: 7659 - Dear Dr. Romance: I got very drunk and kissed another man - by Submitted on Apr 21, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I'm nearly 30 and have been living with my boyfriend for several years. Last year we encountered a rough patch and I felt neglected and unloved and like all respect had gone from our relationship. Unfortunately during this time I got very drunk and kissed another man. I ...
Views: 3458 - Make New Friends, Keep Good Friends - by Submitted on Apr 19, 2014 from Tina TessinaResearch conducted by Dr. Dean Ornish and others shows that the happiest and healthiest people are those who are well-connected to friends and family. But, in our mobile society, keeping friends is not always possible. Long-term friendships are wonderful and valuable, but if you don’t make ...
Views: 1659 - Dear Dr. Romance: Should a grad student in her 20s date a man who's 70? - by Submitted on Apr 17, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: We are co-workers and I've know him for about two years. He's very nice, funny and in very good shape. We've built a pretty solid friendship. We hang out a couple times a month (when I'm home from school). But, lately he's been pushing for a ...
Views: 1404 - Dear Dr. Romance: I can now free myself and enjoy helping people - by Submitted on Apr 14, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I came across your web site when I was desperately looking for motivation. I'm a salesman selling first class products but I couldn't get motivated and it's been a problem for months. It's been getting worse. I read "Motivation and How to ...
Views: 1711 - How to Be Irresistible to Your Mate - by Submitted on Apr 13, 2014 from Tina TessinaOnce upon a time, In high school, I memorized a poem that has been a constant source of help and direction in my life and relationships. It’s simple and much more sentimental than today’s cynical age can handle, but the very simplicity of it made it a great navigational tool for me ...
Views: 1483 - Dr. Romance on Bad Marital habits - by Submitted on Apr 13, 2014 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance sees many clients who are having marital problems because of the following bad habits. If you find yourself doing any of these things, consider changing your behavior or getting counseling. 1) You place social media above real communication; This can be a big problem, ...
Views: 1704 - Into Every Life - by Submitted on Apr 07, 2014 from Tina TessinaAs a parade went by, one of the horses pulling a float entry left a memento in the middle of the road, right in front of where we were watching from the sidewalk. From that point on, every band or group that came marching down the road marched bravely on, right through the pile of horse manure. ...
Views: 1449 - How to Avoid Financial Infidelity - by Submitted on Apr 07, 2014 from Tina TessinaThe most valuable thing in a long-term stable relationship is having a partnership, and most new couples don’t realize that money is a major factor in marital happiness. Money is one of the biggest generators of problems, arguments, and resentment in long-term relationships. Couples argue ...
Views: 1423 - Dear Dr. Romance: It would be embarrassing if they found out it was a wig - by Submitted on Apr 03, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: This question is a little hard for me because it is very personal. My husband and I were married for 24 years before he passed away. During our time together, I developed a severe case of alopecia which has left me with very little hair. This did not bother my ...
Views: 1594 - Dear Dr. Romance: I was reduced to a house maid - by Submitted on Mar 31, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I fell in love and married a man from another city. We have been married for three years. I livedwith his family, which included his parents and his three younger sisters, plus children. In my eastern culture, we mostly live with our inlaws. My mother in law's ...
Views: 1596 - Guidelines for Being Better Understood - by Submitted on Mar 31, 2014 from Tina Tessina1. Seek first to understand. If you know your partner's frame of reference, you can speak to him/her within it. 2. Pay attention to how your words are landing. If your companion's response looks off the mark for what you said, check out what he/she is hearing.... 3. Focus on the solution ...
Views: 1334 - Getting To Yes - by Submitted on Mar 24, 2014 from Tina TessinaThe average person pays more attention to what she’s saying or thinking about than what she is hearing, or how her words are “landing” on the other person. This self-involvement gets worse during an argument. You can become a much more effective communicator by using ...
Views: 1409 - Dr. Romance: Does your relationship need a spring cleaning? - by Submitted on Mar 22, 2014 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance: tips on spring cleaning your marriage: Over an extended period of time, dust and detritus can accumulate in even the best marriage. Spring cleaning, to clear out the cobwebs and re-energize your connection, is a great idea. Just like a regular housework schedule, regular ...
Views: 1616(2 votes) - Dear Dr. Romance: I am in my forties, and hadn't had sex in years. - by Submitted on Mar 18, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. RomanceI am in my forties, and hadn't had sex in years. I met someone and we CLICKED. We had sex on the 2nd date, I know you can't unring the bell, and I'm betting that was probably a mistake, but there is a serious physical attraction between this man and myself ...
Views: 1595 - Fair Fight Guidelines - by Submitted on Mar 17, 2014 from Tina TessinaThirty years of marriage counseling and twenty-five years of a second marriage have convinced me that fights are not necessary in a marriage. Married couples need to have discussions, they need to solve problems, and sometimes they need to disagree, but they don’t need to squabble, argue, ...
Views: 1483 - Dear Dr. Romance: I discovered he crossdressed - by Submitted on Mar 10, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance:When I was 20, I met a man of 37. For many reasons, including what I thought was love, moved in with him 3 weeks later. After getting engaged to my partner, I discovered he crossdressed. I cried, but he said he did it cuz he was alone for so long before he met me. Flash forward ...
Views: 1809(1 vote) - A Good Cry - by Submitted on Mar 09, 2014 from Tina TessinaAt the end of a client-packed day, the trash can in my office is often overflowing with used tissues. Richard, seeing this, usually comments; “Good day, huh?” and we both laugh. He knows that, when clients cry, they’re usually breaking through and healing something. I’ve ...
Views: 1503(1 vote) - 10 Reasons For Not Falling in Love - by Submitted on Mar 07, 2014 from Tina TessinaAlthough you might think of “falling in love” as romantic; we all fall in love many times in life: with a new lover, a new friend, a particularly cooperative co-worker, an appealing movie or TV star, a caring neighbor, siblings, relatives and even pets. Any close relationship ...
Views: 1766 - Dr. Romance Video: Dating after Widowhood - by Submitted on Mar 04, 2014 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance discusses advice on dating after widowhood. To view the video, click here. Dr. Romance's 3 Tips for Finding New Love For a while after a relationship ends, you may not feel like considering a new relationship, which is probably good. Jumping right from ...
Views: 1697 - Coping with Critics - by Submitted on Mar 03, 2014 from Tina TessinaNo one likes to be criticized, fairly or not. It’s always difficult to deal with, and it can hurt. Because I’m a writer of books and columns, and because I’ve lectured, appeared on radio and TV, I am sometimes recognized in public. I’m glad I’m not more ...
Views: 1467(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: She started pushing me away and becoming distant - by Submitted on Feb 27, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I've been dating my girlfriend for 5 almost 6 months now. We hit it off from the very beginning and fell in love a couple months into the relationship. Both of us are independent people and level headed, but there's a deep connection between the two ...
Views: 7628 - Dear Dr. Romance: Strangely, I still love this man - by Submitted on Feb 24, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: Last year, my boyfriend he broke up with me 3 days before my birthday. On the actual day, he didn't even so much as text or call to wish me a happy birthday - or even send me a card. I was devastated, esp because I really made a big deal of his birthday last ...
Views: 1293(2 votes) - Four Steps to Success - by Submitted on Feb 24, 2014 from Tina TessinaIn my private counseling practice, clients often tell me, “I want to be happy!” We then set about making it a reality. As a psychotherapist, I know that Your habits, your relationships, your environment, and especially what you think about them determine more about how happy you are ...
Views: 1465(2 votes) - Dr. Romance on Love and Chemistry - by Submitted on Feb 21, 2014 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance writes: Many of my clients want to know: What is a safe surrender to love? They have been in love before, and have gotten hurt. While we all are aware of the joy and beauty of love, and the profound pleasure of being in love, most of us are also afraid of mistakes, of making a wrong ...
Views: 1344 - Dear Dr. Romance: It left me feeling like a loveless phony - by Submitted on Feb 18, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I just found your article "Without Ego" Omg you are just who I've been looking for. For the past two years I've been reading articles about dissolving the ego and all this hubbub. For those two years I was told that I have an ego that is ...
Views: 1379 - When Love is Kind: Mutuality in Relationships - by Submitted on Feb 17, 2014 from Tina TessinaMany people ask me, “How will I know if I'm in love?” Answer: Anyone who's in love usually knows it; the real question should be are we mutually in love, or am I wasting my time? If you want to be secure in your primary relationship, knowing how to create mutuality and work together ...
Views: 1346 - Friends With Benefits - by Submitted on Feb 17, 2014 from Tina TessinaIf you’re thinking about having sex with a friend, be very careful, because it is not easy to preserve a friendship once you have sex. We think we can control our feelings, but it's not so simple. • If one of you becomes romantically attached as a result of the sex, ...
Views: 1501 - Dear D. Romance: I've learned my lesson - by Submitted on Feb 10, 2014 from Tina TessinaClick here for video Dear Dr. Romance: I saw your video "Don't Call Your Ex" Great video post, good advice. I couldn't agree with you more. It was a very timely message for me. Just recently, I decided to let go of my partner...for ...
Views: 1466