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Articles from Tina Tessina | Selfgrowth.com
- The One Who Got Away - by Submitted on Oct 04, 2015 from Tina TessinaWhen I was a girl, growing up in the small township of Rockland, New York, there was a tiny post office, which was a small room with a separate entry in the house next door. Rockland’s official postmistress was Clara Weiss, who seemed very elderly even when I was a very small child. She ...
Views: 1121(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: He Does Holidays with His Ex and Kids - by Submitted on Nov 20, 2017 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I found one your article "Dr. Romance: Setting Boundaries with Your Ex" on SelfGrowth.com and wanted to reach out to a professional that is an expert with Divorce, families and integrating a new partner. I am single, 30, never been married, no ...
Views: 1120(1 vote) - Dr. Romance on: Getting To Yes - by Submitted on Jul 10, 2018 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance writes: The average person pays more attention to what he or she's saying or thinking about than what he or she is hearing, or how his or her words are "landing" on the other person. This self-involvement gets worse during an argument. You can become a much more effective ...
Views: 1120(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I actually forwarded him the conversation by accident - by Submitted on Jul 25, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I actually forwarded him the conversation by accident Dear Dr. Romance: I am a woman in my thirties. It's been over a month since I last spoke with my ex-boyfriend of one year. He gave me the silent treatment because I hurt him. Or it might be his ...
Views: 1118(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: What is being a therapist like? - by Submitted on Jul 13, 2015 from Tina TessinaQ & A with a Dr. Romance reader: Q: I would like your advice and input. I have been working in business for 12 years as a CPA and have recently been quite frustrated with it. Recently I did some career/interests/aptitude testing and found that the work I do now is pretty much what I ...
Views: 1118(2 votes) - Dear Dr. Romance: I Cry upon a disagreement - by Submitted on May 18, 2016 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: Your article on "Fair Fight Guidelines" is wonderful!!! My major issue is that I cry upon a disagreement. This prevents me to think clearly, act maturely and interact directly. Would you please address this issue? Dear Reader: Thank you for the ...
Views: 1113 - Dr. Romance on: Where is Love? - by Submitted on Oct 21, 2015 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance writes: Probably the most prevalent question I’m asked in my counseling practice is "Where is love?" Clients want to know why they can’t find a successful life partnership, why a friend or family member won’t respond as they would like, even why they don’t love themselves. ...
Views: 1109(2 votes) - Dr. Romance on You Be The Judge - by Submitted on Oct 05, 2017 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance writes: In my therapy practice, I witness a lot of confusion about the proper role of judgement in life and relationships. Often, when I ask clients to analyze whether a person they’re dating has good character, they tell me they don’t want to be judgmental. People in twelve step ...
Views: 1108(1 vote) - Dr. Romance Happiness Tip: New Year's Resolution: Letting Go of Anxiety - by Submitted on Jan 04, 2018 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance asks: What is the best New Year's resolution you can make for your happiness? To let go of Anxiety. These days, it seems that there’s one disaster after another. Not only do we have do deal with an angry Mother Nature, but all sorts of fanatics and psychopaths are on the ...
Views: 1106(1 vote) - Dr. Romance: Detox Your Life - by Submitted on Aug 02, 2018 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance writes: Many of my clients come in with complaints about personal habits that feel toxic in their lives. Just as you can detox your body when you’re feeling sluggish, it’s also possible to detox your emotional life. Here are some of the most common ways your life can ...
Views: 1103(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: What is wrong with me? - by Submitted on Jul 06, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: What is wrong with me? Angry, sad, blah? It's 5 am and i'm still awake. i'm 29, single (i don't mind), i go to school, an ok job, pets. i'm not starving, as long at there's a roof over my head i'm good to go. so many things i really want to do. i get into it then i don't ...
Views: 1102(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I can't shut the voice in my head - by Submitted on Oct 29, 2015 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I have just read your article that appeared on yahoo today on the issue of having an older partner. First let me thank you for bringing up such topic, as it has been considered for a long time as a classified one. second, i have some questions that i need clarify for ...
Views: 1097 - Dear Dr. Romance: I got upset when he said he wants to stop fornicating with me - by Submitted on Dec 08, 2017 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: My male friend likes to look at good looking women a second time and more and if the woman is looking at him, he will stare at her. I have a friend that is nine years younger than I am. I am the age of his older brother.We have been seeing each other for two and a ...
Views: 1097 - Dr. Romance on Getting Out of Your Own Way - by Submitted on Jul 17, 2016 from Tina TessinaRecently, Dr. Romance has been asked a lot about how people can overcome paralysis and self-sabotage, so I thought I’d pass on my ideas on the subject. Getting in your own way is all about how you relate your yourself. In addition to not managing your time effectively, ...
Views: 1096(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I have questioned bisexuality with him and he becomes furious - by Submitted on Apr 25, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I have been married for about 25 yrs. 14 yrs ago, I realized that other men around my husband make him much happier than i could. He laughs and i can tell he likes it, He keeps a very long 10-12 hr days working, very dedicated to work, but he drives to ...
Views: 1090(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I want my wife to be my lover - by Submitted on Apr 19, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I wanted to get someone else's take on what is going on in my marriage right now. My problem is that right now my wife and I do not have sex all that often, we average about once every month and half to two months. I have tried talking to my wife about this subject before and ...
Views: 1084(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: To this day I am not sure why he became so angry - by Submitted on Jul 25, 2019 from Tina TessinaDear Dr Romance: I hope you will be able to provide me with an insight. I was in a relationship with a man I genuinely loved and wanted future with. Our relationship was lovely to start with but after a few months problems started to emerge: another woman told me he was in a ...
Views: 1083(2 votes) - Dear Dr. Romance: How do you get unstuck and really talk? - by Submitted on Dec 18, 2017 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I was so interested in your article "Getting to Yes" about Attentive listening...what a powerful strategy and descriptive techniques. Here is a but.....I have????? Now, what if ....as you are listening you recognize the signals you ...
Views: 1082 - Dear Dr. Romance: I just don't understand men - by Submitted on Sep 29, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I'll admit, I just don't understand men. Do they want us to be perfect all the time? I mean, I think I'm a pretty okay person. I honestly like myself for who I am. It took me a long time to get to this point. I'm not a model, but reasonably attractive for a woman in her 40s. ...
Views: 1082 - Dear Dr. Romance: I was tired of being his 'booty call' - by Submitted on May 18, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I'm at a loss as to what to do. I'm married to a man that I sleep in the same bed (our daughter co-sleeps with us) with but other than that not much else. We are in our thirties, and we've been married about two years but have been living together for longer. In ...
Views: 1081(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I am a married man infatuated with a coworker half my age - by Submitted on May 12, 2020 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I am a happily married man in my mid-forties with 2 small kids who has become overwhelmingly infatuated with a 22 year old co-worker. She is friendly but certainly not coquettish and there is no suggestion she reciprocates. I have no intention of trying to pursue ...
Views: 1080(1 vote) - Surviving Loss and Thriving Again - by Submitted on Mar 01, 2015 from Tina TessinaNone of us wants to think about it, but the standard definition of a totally successful relationship is the old, traditional “til death do us part.” Any time we love, whether it’s a life partner, a dear friend, a child, a sibling, a parent or even a beloved pet, we are risking ...
Views: 1079 - Dr. Romance: Creating a Blended Family When You Have a New Partner - by Submitted on Dec 10, 2019 from Tina TessinaOnce you have gone through the wrenching experience of loss or divorce, it's not easy to pick up the pieces and find a new love. If you have children, they have been through a lot of upset, also. So when you do find a new love and want to create a blended family in a new way, these ...
Views: 1078(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I was beaten unconscious by a convicted sex offender - by Submitted on Mar 02, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I was beaten unconcious by a client. He is a convicted sex offender and gang member who has been put in jail and let out many times for crimes against women. He has told people he is going to kill me. I continue to go to court on the issue and they simply won't help me and say ...
Views: 1077(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I am in my forties, and hadn't had sex in years. - by Submitted on May 06, 2020 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. RomanceI am in my forties, and hadn't had sex in years. I met someone and we CLICKED. We had sex on the 2nd date, I know you can't unring the bell, and I'm betting that was probably a mistake, but there is a serious physical attraction between this man and myself ...
Views: 1076(1 vote) - Dear Dr Romance: Should I date my girlfriend's best friend? - by Submitted on Dec 17, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I need relationship advice!!!? I have been with my girlfriend for 4 months now and her best friend who's a girl is also my best friend and I'm very close with the best friend. me and my girlfriend do fight a lot but there are times where I'm in love with her. and me and the ...
Views: 1075(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: What are your suggestions for locating a therapist? - by Submitted on Apr 19, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I am a reader and a fan of It Ends with You: Grow Up and Out of Dysfunction. It's been a big help to me. Thank you! I am looking for a therapist in my city to help me sort through my life's direction. I have been living a life that someone else in ...
Views: 1073(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: We have had constant fights over little things - by Submitted on Oct 18, 2017 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: Last week my husband and I had an argument over something so small like not getting up to give our kid his medicine. Just because I didn't get up he started calling me names and he pushed me from the bed. Currently, we decided we needed time apart so we ...
Views: 1068 - Dr. Romance on Giving Thanks - by Submitted on Nov 30, 2018 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance wishes you a Happy Thanksgiving! A lot of people aren’t very good at looking at the positive. I hear a lot of negativity, blaming and complaining daily in my counseling office, and I find the more negative people are, the worse their lives work. Talking about how bad it all is seems ...
Views: 1067(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: Can you help me save my relationship ? - by Submitted on Apr 30, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance:I am having trouble in my relationship. My biggest problems are fibbing and patience. Fibbing is what my fiancee calls it, I call it extending the truth a little further than it really is. But, Patience is the thing I've really having trouble with and that I need your help ...
Views: 1066(1 vote) - Dr. Romance: Turn on Your Charm - by Submitted on Oct 26, 2017 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance writes: Ever wondered how con artists can get away with all they do? They know how to charm people, and they have mastered the art of looking as if they belong. Because they have no feelings of guilt about misrepresenting themselves, they can pull it off. But you ...
Views: 1065 - Dear Dr. Romance: I feel like such a damned freak. - by Submitted on Mar 09, 2015 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: My entire adult life, I have gone out to all the places you're told to go to meet someone special. Nothing. I never even get asked out. It's like I'm invisible, and my life has wasted away because there's not a damn thing I can to do to 'make' someone ...
Views: 1061 - Dr. Romance on Asking for What you Want - by Submitted on Sep 20, 2017 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance writes: In my counseling office, I see a lot of damaged relationships because people don’t know how to ask for what they want, or don’t think it’s OK. Whether it's your couple relationship, family connections, friends or work colleagues, not asking for what you want means you’ll ...
Views: 1061(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I am so sad because I don't see this marriage working - by Submitted on Dec 18, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: My husband complains that life is a habitrail that he has to get on everyday and he is not being reloaded. I have tried everything I know how to make things better for him. I don't know how to reply anymore, and honestly I am not sure there is ...
Views: 1060(1 vote) - Dr. Romance’s guide to dating safely: - by Submitted on Aug 21, 2018 from Tina TessinaI have encountered so many people who have been disappointed, ripped off or worse when dating online, that I drew up some guidelines for keeping yourself safe. Dr. Romance’s guide to dating safely: Be skeptical, not gullible. When you're meeting dates online (it is not dating until it's ...
Views: 1057(1 vote) - Dr. Romance on Anger: Cleansing Squall or Hurricane? - by Submitted on Mar 30, 2018 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance writes: Many people who come to me for therapy have trouble with anger. It may be trouble in expressing anger effectively, losing control with their anger, or becoming the victim of someone else's abuse. Understanding how anger works and what it really is can help you manage ...
Views: 1054(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: My wife has been unhappy with me for years. - by Submitted on Jul 29, 2019 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I came across your article on "The Nail in the Fence: Healing Relationship Wounds". I am a thirty-something man living on the West Coast. My wife and I have been together for ten years, married for six. We have three small children, and my wife has a pre-teen daughter ...
Views: 1050(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: Perhaps my desire will never be realized - by Submitted on Sep 21, 2017 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance, Not knowing just where to begin, I will simply state that I am a man in my mid-fifties, who possesses exceptional health and fitness, and who has been in love with a much younger woman, (mid-thirties), for many years and who has just lost her husband through ...
Views: 1049(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I have been hurt by every guy I have dated - by Submitted on Nov 26, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I am in a new relationship for a few months. I haven't dated for a couple of years on the advice of my therapist. I met a really nice guy on an online dating service which was totally out of my character. He is a really nice guy (Thank God) He lives in a different state ...
Views: 1047(1 vote) - Dr. Romance on Dating after Loss - by Submitted on Jun 19, 2020 from Tina TessinaGrief is an essential life skill -- knowing how to survive grief means feeling safe to take another risk, and grieving actually expands one's capacity to love.Expression of grief, and respect for the dead, is very important to the grieving process. A symbol of grief for the loss of one ...
Views: 1043(1 vote) - Dr. Romance on dealing with disappointment - by Submitted on Nov 26, 2018 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance writes: OK, so you're disappointed. Your dream has ended in the trash. So, after you get finished with laying on the floor, kicking your heels, and screaming; or going on a drunken binge, or beating someone up, you find you're still disappointed, and all ...
Views: 1040(1 vote) - Dr. Romance on: Getting To Yes - by Submitted on Jul 19, 2011 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance writes: The average person pays more attention to what she's saying or thinking about than what she is hearing, or how her words are "landing" on the other person. This self-involvement gets worse during an argument. You can become a much more effective communicator by using what I ...
Views: 1039(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: Is it possible to love someone without ever dating them? - by Submitted on Dec 28, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: Is it possible to love someone without ever dating them? If so, how can you tell that you are in love? Dear Reader: Yes, it's possible to fall in love without dating. For example, if you have a close friend, classmate, work associate, neighbor or friend of a friend ...
Views: 1038(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: Am I Single? - by Submitted on Sep 11, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr.Romance: My friends were joking that I have never been single, and I argued that I have - but they said my definition of being single was wrong! true, I tend to have long term relationships, but before I met my last boyfriend I was "single" for nearly a year. I define this as ...
Views: 1036(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: she will only participate if i ask - by Submitted on May 11, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: This is a diificult one for you, my daughter's stepdaughter was molested by my father about two years ago, because of it we had financial issues, had to leave our home and buy another and go through a long court proceeding, which ended several months ago. A month later, my ...
Views: 1035(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I have been feeling lonely since high school - by Submitted on May 18, 2016 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I am 23 years old. I have been feeling lonely since high school and recently, its been getting worse. I feel like I can't have really close relationships with women and yet that is what I crave most right now. I recently cut off a friendship of 5 years because my ...
Views: 1033 - Dear Dr. Romance: I'm terrified to recommit - by Submitted on Mar 15, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I'm terrified to recommit Dear Dr. Romance: I'm in my mid-twenties and a professional. I recently brokeup from a bad relationship with my fiancee, and lost everything. Its been sometime and I've moved on I'm doing well, but find ...
Views: 1032(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: Should I try to fuel the desires or calm them? - by Submitted on Nov 24, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I saw your article "Age Differences in Dating " I'm single, in my early thirties. for the last, i'd say 6 years, i have been extremely attracted to women in their forties. it's both a physical and mental attraction. i live in an upscale part of the ...
Views: 1029(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I regret not telling her how I felt - by Submitted on Jan 08, 2019 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I was very attracted to a lady and I did things for her with out asking for any thing in return. She was single and I fixed her jeep, I put down new linoleum in her kitchen for her, we did go out together for drinks, dinner, dancing, movies as ...
Views: 1026(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: the truth made me feel worse. - by Submitted on Mar 08, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I dated a woman for about a year who was divorced with a small child. For most of our time together, I believed that I had found the best person ever. She was very honest, open minded, considerate, respectful, loving, and kind. Our relationship was excellent. ...
Views: 1026(1 vote)