Creating The Life You Want

There is only one success - to be able to spend your life in your own way. -Christopher Morley (American writer, 1890-1957)

The arrival of a new calendar year usually means two things: a big night out and a slew of resolutions, which - we already know - equate to great intentions that we won’t stick to.

Regardless of the eve’s adventures, what if we turn this New Year’s resolutions into powerful creations? It’s possible to create exactly what we wish, and to enjoy the process.

One of the benefits of the popularity of the movie The Secret is it opened many eyes to the possibility that we can actually create, and, in fact we are always creating. On the flipside, though, it may have led a lot of people to thinking that they can simply imagine and wish, and then their dreams will appear. Maybe… and maybe not.

I’m a fan of the ‘whatever works’ philosophy. If you wish and your dreams simply and directly come true, great. If, however, you’ve tried this approach without satisfactory results, read on.

The first step:
The Secret did reveal some of the most basic, important and obvious truths that – oddly enough – many of us hadn’t realized or believed: that whatever we direct our attention towards gets energized, that we’re always creating (whether intentionally or unconsciously) and that it’s completely possible to live as we wish.

This first step is essential for conscious manifestation. Without it, any endeavor is likely doomed. Already this becomes a sticky point for many of us - how can I see it, if I don’t believe it? Perhaps our experience has shown us that believing in our dreams is foolish and fruitless, or perhaps we’ve succumbed to the limiting ‘be realistic’ mentality we were taught while growing up. Yet the mind is a spectacular tool, capable of anything. So, even if part of us is skeptical, we set aside space for another, imaginative part of us to dream and to vision. Sure, doubts might creep in, and that’s fine. Yet to successfully create we keep energizing the believing, imaginative part.

Henry Ford said: “Whether you believe you can do a thing or not, you’re right.”
And Einstein said: “The gift of fantasy has meant more to me than my talent for absorbing knowledge.”

The second step:
If you’ve taken the first great step and some part of you sees what you wish to create, then how do you energize it, how to you take it to reality? This is where The Secret might fall short, where unsuspectingly we might end up disappointed – the second step is also vital: do something about it.

“The Lord helps those who help themselves.” The simple act of visioning will begin many helpful processes. We’ll meet people, generate ideas, encounter resources, develop initiative and persistence, all of which will move us closer to our goal, or our goal closer to us. Again: ‘whatever works.’ We move forward (according to our own definition of forward) by trial and success. Every action, every effort, leads us closer to our goal.

Once the vision is clear, write it down. Thought, word, action. Three essential components to help speed along our goals – and to keep us expanding our possibilities are: express goals in positive terms (say what you want rather than what you don’t want), use the present tense (write it as if it was already realized), and leave room for things to be even better than you imagine (you can add ‘or better’ to any goal). The clearer we see our goal, and the clearer we write our goal, the sooner it becomes reality.

For example: if my desire is to balance in handstand, first I must believe it’s possible. This vision is easy - there are plenty of examples of people who balance in handstand. There was a time when we thought it impossible to run a mile in less than four minutes. Then Roger Banister did it and within weeks people all over the world were following suit. Whatever anyone else has done, we can do to. And that’s just for starters – we can also do plenty that no one’s ever done if we can just imagine it.
“Sometimes I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.” – Louis Carroll.
And Walt Disney added: “It’s kind of fun to do the impossible.”

Once I’ve made up my mind that I can do handstand, I energize that belief by writing down my goal. I balance on my hands with effortless joy (expressed in the present tense and positively). The more specific we are, the clearer and quicker the results are. I might add for 10 deep breaths.

Having taken these steps, what might come next? I could immediately achieve the handstand. Or it might take some time, which, as long as we are moving in the direction we want, is not so important. Believing in and writing our goal will inspire us to action. We’ll practice. We might look to people who’ve achieved the results we wish and then model some part of ourselves after them. We might put posters of people in handstand on our wall. We might ask them directly how they do it. We might close our eyes and visualize ourselves doing it. Perhaps the next yoga class we attend will be focusing on just that posture. Then it’s up to us to follow up on the opportunities that ‘appear.’

We live in a culture that expects results immediately. And sometimes, if we don’t get what we want right away, we think something’s wrong, and we give up. So, to continue energizing our goal, we might read it out loud twice a day. We might ask some friend to remind us, to periodically ask us how we’re doing with our goal.

"Genius is 1 percent inspiration and 99 percent perspiration." -Thomas Edison

The final step:
We have to be open to experience life in a new way for our goals to come into place. Some aspects of our life will change. Most new attitudes, behaviors, feelings and even poses, feel awkward or uncomfortable at first. We could unconsciously prevent wonderful new facets of our life just by continuously thinking of ourselves as we were, as we have been. We can be anything we want. If I always thought I was someone who couldn’t do a handstand, that ‘reality’ must fall away when I prove my old thinking wrong. Are you ready for a change? Are you ready to be happy?

Further tips on goal-setting:
If you need a boost to figure out what you want, you might start by setting the goal of ‘I know what I want.’

Some games to spark your imagination: make a list of experiences you’d like to have before you die (unless you’ve already made immortality one of your goals). Skydiving, visiting the Himalayas, a harmonious relationship, parenting, writing a novel, building an orphanage. Rule nothing out.

You might brainstorm your goals by category: health, business, financial, relationship, spiritual, home, family, yoga.

Imagine your life 5, 10, 20 years from now. What does it look like? Who are you with, what are you doing? How do you want other people to experience you?

If your goals seem far-fetched, that just means they’re big goals, powerful, and likely even more gratifying when you reach them. As Lao Tzu said, “The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.” After you see the final goal, then find one action you can take now, give yourself a timeline to do it, and begin it.

Periodically review your goals. Add to them. Refine them. See if they still fit
you or if you want to modify them. Write down why you have a particular goal. When goals are more energized with emotion, with purpose, they have more momentum.

Surround yourself with people that support you, that believe in you. We become like the people we spend time with. Who focuses on possibilities, who’s positive, who inspires you? Feed on what uplifts you, whether it’s food, film, media or friends. What contributes to the most energized, enthusiastic, and happy you?

Gandhi said “Be the change you want to see.” Our world’s crying out for more people who are dynamically living the lives they wish. Joy and presence is contagious. You might even have a responsibility – the ability to respond – to live your dreams.

Ultimately achieving goal after goal doesn’t guarantee happiness. True inner satisfaction won’t come from achievements. Yet, while we’re in the game of life, we might as well play well. In experiencing our creative power we come to understand that we are not victims in life. It’s not happening ‘to’ us; we are – consciously or not – always co creating our experience with life. Perhaps in realizing our goals, we’ll also realize that liberation, too, is a choice.

“Whatever you can do, or dream you can do, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it. Begin it now.” – W.H. Murray.