For quite some time now, it has been said that there are plenty young men that are suffering from motivational problems. Unlike a lot of young women, these young men don’t have a lot of drive.

But, as so much attention had been placed on young girls, this is an issue that has largely been ignored. What undoubtedly plays a part in this is the fact that, in general, females are seen as being oppressed and held back by the ‘patriarchy’, which is why so much energy and attention is directed towards young girls.


And, regardless of whether this is actually true or not, it has meant that a lot of young men are being overlooked when it comes to support and guidance. It’s as though young men can sort themselves out and don’t need any kind of support or guidance.

Yet, even though this can appear to be the case, it is clear that young men need support and guidance just as young women do. So, bearing in mind how many young men not in a good way, it is pretty obvious that a lot needs to be done to get them back on track.

A Big Problem

One of the main reasons why so many young men are lost is surely due to the lack of male role models in society. Let’s say that a young man is at college/universality, what he could find is that most of his tutors are women.

Along with this, his father might not be around, and, even if he is, he might not be emotionally available. Perhaps there another male figure there to fill in the gap or maybe there are no other male figures around.

Looking Outwards

If he was to look beyond his family and his university/college for guidance, he may look towards the world of entertainment. He could then come across a lot of men who come across as totally incapable and men who come across as though they don’t have emotions.

Both of these types of men are not going to be good role models, but this could be as good as it gets for him. Thanks to the conditioning that he has received at home and during his time in the education system, he is unlikely to have a good view of himself.

Behind Closed Doors

If his father is not around, there is the chance that his mother has spent a lot of time criticising his father. This may then have set him to set him up to believe that men are basically worthless.

Even though he would have most likely played no part in the reason why his father left, deep down, he can believe that it’s because he is worthless. Based on this, if he had value, his father would still be around.

A Natural Consequence

Through feeling as though he is a deeply flawed human being, it is not going to be a surprise for him to spend a lot of time feeling depressed, and even to withdraw from the real world and into the world of virtual reality. Being in this state is not going to supply him with much motivation, that’s for sure.

It can be normal for him to be passive and to act as though his life has no purpose. He won’t value himself, so he is unlikely to value his time or believe that he will be able to contribute anything of value to the world.

The Drip-Feed Approach

What he may have learnt, during his time in the education system, is that masculinity is a problem. Perhaps he has had classes that talk about ‘toxic masculinity’ and how oppressive men are.

This is then going to be another environment where he will receive negative messages about males and men in particular. And, if men are only causing problems in the world, why the hell would be wont to grow into one?

Another Source

It doesn’t stop there, though, as he will also have to deal with the hate that a number of mainstream media organisations direct towards men. Men are often painted in a negative light, while women are often painted in a positive light.

The misandry that a number of these organisations embody can then play a part in why a young man would end up forming a negative view of himself. Even the American Psychological Association (APA) has been infected by the ‘men are bad’ ideology.

A Total Shambles

This organisation is supposed to exist to assist people with their mental and emotional challenges, not to indoctrinate them. According to these experts, ‘traditional masculinity’ is now a problem.

Thus, even if a young man has a father around who does offer him guidance, he will still have to deal with messages that say that masculine traits are a problem and men are bad. Indentifying with women and displaying feminine traits can then be seen as the best way for him to survive in the modern day world.


Taking all these factors into account, it could be said that it is a minefield for a young man nowadays. If a young man has an emotional available father around, or someone similar, it will make it easier for him to handle this rocky terrain, but it still won’t be a walk in the park.

Fortunately, if a young man is starved of support guidance, he can find plenty of information online that will assist him. There are books, articles and videos that will provide him with some of the support and guidance that is not being provided by anyone in the real world.

Author's Bio: 

Teacher, prolific writer, author, and consultant, Oliver JR Cooper, hails from England. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation, including love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With over two thousand in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behaviour, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice.

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