Happily Ever After Starts Now!

As little girls, we grew up with dreams of eventually living our own fairy tale lives. We saw Cinderella getting the prince, Sleeping Beauty awakening to her beloved's kiss after years of sleep, and Snow White living happily ever after with her true love. We yearned for the time in our own lives when the prince would come and sweep us off our feet or rescue us from distress. Unfortunately, by waiting for knights in shining armor to come along, we set ourselves up for disappointment, disillusionment, and distress.

When we take responsibility for our own "happily ever afters," we empower ourselves to create the lives of our dreams - regardless of what anyone else is doing or saying. In order to create our own fairly tale lives, we need to proactively pursue things that make us happy in the moment. Everyone we know and love will benefit when we fill ourselves up. Some suggestions for doing so might include:

Setting aside one day per month as our own "fabulously fun" day.

Let's get creative here, and start by asking some questions. What elements would we like to add to this day to make it phenomenal? Who would we spend our time with? What would we listen to? What would we eat? What new experiences would we incorporate into the day? How would we pamper ourselves?

Scheduling ourselves into our appointment calendars.

By doing this consistently, we send ourselves and the world the message that our self-care is important. We also get into the habit of saying yes to the things that matter most to us.

Surrounding ourselves with people, places, and things that inspire and motivate us.

The truth is that we are a little bit like sponges. We soak up the thoughts, feelings, and moods of those around us. The more we are around people and environments that support our growth and best interests, the more we stack the decks in our favor.

Taking total responsibility for our choices and actions.

Let's face it. Blaming others might seem justified at times, but it leaves us in the position of being victims. When we point our fingers outward, we become helpless and unable to implement solutions. We have absolutely no control over the behaviors of others or the hills and valleys of life circumstances. We only have control of ourselves. Acknowledging this fact totally empowers us.

Avoiding people, places, and situations that diminish our enjoyment of life.

We've all come across those people who need to rain on our parades. Their negative outlooks can infect our attitudes and derail us if we let them. Learning to say "no" to situations and experiences that drain our energies and our spirits is critical if we want to make space for the ones that enliven us.

Taking delight in our five senses.

The world is filled with wonderful sights, scents, sounds, tastes, and textures. Why not take time to surround ourselves with ones we love. In order to truly experience the physical world around us, we need to show up mentally and practice being totally present in the moment.

Deciding to stop settling.

Let's check in with ourselves and see where we have been settling for less than we deserve in our environments, our relationships, our careers, our friendships, our lives. What can we eliminate? What can we delegate? What do we need to say "no" to? What do we want to experience more of? Who do we want to get closer to?

Passionately pursuing our dreams.

We need to write our dreams down, believe in them, and pursue them diligently and with clear intentions. Let's take on the attitude of pursuing our dreams UNTIL we achieve them - then we will never give up until we reach our own "happily-ever-afters ."

Copyright © 2009 by Holly Cox, L.C. P.C., C.D.C.®