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Articles from Peggy Ferguson | Selfgrowth.com
- Addiction and Recovery: "Treatment" and "Recovery" Are Not The Same Thing. - by Submitted on Jun 03, 2010 from Peggy Ferguson"My spouse went to recovery. Now they tell me that he needs to go on to additional counseling. What is that all about?" "Recovery" and "treatment" are not the same thing. Inpatient treatment, detox, or outpatient treatment, in and of itself, is not "recovery". Recovery is generally a return ...
Views: 2909(2 votes) - Addiction and Recovery: Why Don't They Just Quit? - by Submitted on Feb 03, 2011 from Peggy FergusonFamily members are often stymied about how their alcoholic/addicted family member can continue to drink or use in the face of overwhelming evidence that the chemical is destroying their lives. “Why don’t they just quit?” is a question that could rightfully top the list of “FAQs by Family ...
Views: 2020(2 votes) - Addiction and Recovery: Don't Let Grief Over the Loss of Alcohol Derail Your Transition Into Recovery - by Submitted on Feb 23, 2010 from Peggy FergusonOne of the common experiences of the earliest efforts toward quitting drinking and becoming sober, is grief over the loss of the chemical. For many people with an alcohol or other drug problem, the chemical, (whether it is alcohol or oxycodone) has become the addict's best friend and constant ...
Views: 4633(2 votes) - Addiction in Ongoing Recovery: Getting Acquainted With Middle Ground - by Submitted on Aug 04, 2011 from Peggy FergusonThe main task of early recovery is spent in trying to interrupt the momentum of the addiction to achieve sustained abstinence. Most of one's mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual energy is spent on that goal. In ongoing, stable, sustained recovery, the recovering person is no longer ...
Views: 2462(1 vote) - Addiction Recovery Worksheet For Identifying Healthy Replacements for the Alcohol and Drugs - by Submitted on Jun 16, 2010 from Peggy FergusonOne of the most important tasks of early recovery from alcohol and other drug addiction is learning to replace the chemical with health living skills. When you have taken the chemical out of your life, it leaves a big gaping hole, where something of substance was. Alcohol or other drugs have ...
Views: 11104(2 votes) - How to Separate the Help From The Hype In Addiction Treatment - by Submitted on Sep 22, 2010 from Peggy FergusonThere is so much "information" on the internet about addiction and recovery and unless you already have some knowledge about addiction and recovery, all resources may appear equal to you. This is not the case. There are advertisements, articles, and blog posts about addiction recovery ...
Views: 1932(2 votes) - Standing At The Crossroads: Trying to Quit Using Drugs - by Submitted on Nov 19, 2010 from Peggy FergusonPeople do not easily come to the conclusion that they have an alcohol or other drug problem. The telltale signs have been there quite some time. Addiction carries with it its own camouflage devices. It can look like a lot of other illnesses from the perspective of an outsider looking in. ...
Views: 2245(2 votes) - Staying Sober After In-Patient Treatment: Ten Reasons To Follow Through With Continuing Care Even If You Don't Want To - by Submitted on Jun 02, 2010 from Peggy FergusonThe majority of patients who successfully complete inpatient and have the desire to stay clean and sober relapse in the first year after acute care treatment. Anyone who has been to inpatient treatment has noticed that the among the other patients around them, that there is a large percentage ...
Views: 2874(2 votes) - Using The “Cognitive Therapy for the Holidays” Worksheet To Reduce Your Holiday Stress - by Submitted on Nov 23, 2010 from Peggy FergusonTry a little cognitive therapy to reduce your holiday stress. Cognitive therapy examines the thoughts and beliefs that lead to feelings, and thus to behavior. Everyone has some cognitive distortions which are irrational ideas, thoughts, or beliefs, that get in the way of optimal functioning. ...
Views: 5753(3 votes) - Addiction and Recovery: The Cross Addiction Worksheet - by Submitted on Feb 13, 2010 from Peggy FergusonMany recovering people who begin the process of becoming clean and sober, harbor the notion that they can continue to hang on to some remnants of an old drinking/using lifestyle. They often initially believe that specific drugs are The Problem. Initially alcoholics/addicts may not consider use ...
Views: 13551(4 votes) - Addiction and Recovery: Who Will Enable Your Addicted Loved One When You Quit? - by Submitted on Jun 03, 2010 from Peggy Ferguson"Enabling" can be described as a behavior pattern of the significant people in the life on an addict or alcoholic. "Enabling" involves rescuing the alcoholic/addict from the negative consequences of his or her behavior. When the addict has those negative consequences of his/her addiction ...
Views: 3296(4 votes) - Family Dynamics of Addiction and Recovery - How Can I Tell If My Partner Is Serious About Recovery? - by Submitted on May 24, 2009 from Peggy FergusonMost spouses of alcoholics or addicts have been down this road before. Something has happened. Some crisis has gotten the attention of the alcoholic/addict and now he is motivated to get clean and sober. This time he is going to AA/NA and going to counseling. Promises made by the addict to stop ...
Views: 2586(3 votes) - A Relapse Prevention Tool - Emotional Cues for Cravings in Relapse Worksheet - by Submitted on Jul 25, 2009 from Peggy FergusonWe experience sensory, emotional/psychological, cognitive, environmental, and physical cues on a daily basis in early recovery. These cues or triggers, if left unchecked can turn into powerful cravings for the chemical. Cravings can lead to relapse. In order to avoid relapse it is crucial that ...
Views: 13957(2 votes) - Addiction and Recovery: The Social and Environmental Triggers Worksheet - by Submitted on Jul 25, 2009 from Peggy FergusonAssociations between particular feelings, people, places, and events becomes intertwined with the alcoholic or addicts drinking and drugging behavior. When alcoholics and addicts find their way to recovery, the old associations between the drinking and drugging and the old feeling, people, ...
Views: 10513(2 votes) - Communication in Recovery - Ten Steps to Fair Fighting - by Submitted on May 24, 2009 from Peggy FergusonUse the following ten steps to replace old, ineffective arguments with an effective fair fighting session: 1. Fight to resolve an issue or solve a problem. 2. Identify the problem to be solved. 3. Take turns stating your case, using I messages. 4. Practice active listening. 5. Generate ...
Views: 3089(1 vote) - Family Dynamics of Addiction And Recovery - Deciding What to do about an Adult Child's Addiction - by Submitted on Jul 25, 2009 from Peggy FergusonWhen an adult child with addiction problems lives with his parents, those parents are faced with hard choices. The addict believes that he is only harming himself, yet the truth is that the addiction is hurting everyone and is typically tearing the family apart. Parents and significant others ...
Views: 1786(2 votes) - How to Overcome Seven Obstacles to New Year's Resolutions Success - by Submitted on Dec 31, 2009 from Peggy FergusonI love the New Year. I feel like I am the threshold of a new year. I am glad that there is a week between Christmas and the New Year because it gives me a chance to recover, regroup, and rethink. Of course, I would like to think of a new year as a fresh, blank, Big Chief Tablet to write ...
Views: 2535(2 votes) - Quitting Pot: 16 Steps to Help You Quit and Stay Quit - by Submitted on Jul 25, 2009 from Peggy FergusonOk, so you have decided that your life needs a little help and to accomplish this, you have decided to quit smoking pot. You have flushed or given away your stash. You have gotten rid of the paraphernalia. It has been a couple of days since you smoked pot and you're feeling cranky. You are not ...
Views: 8206(3 votes) - Sexual Addiction: A Brief Description, Part 1 - by Submitted on Apr 27, 2009 from Peggy FergusonIf you see yourself in this brief description of sexual addiction, it can be the beginning of achieving recovery and getting your life back. The hope is that there is recovery, that it is possible. "The journey of a thousand miles begins by taking the initial step". The good news is that you ...
Views: 2697(1 vote) - Sexual Addiction: Are You a Sex Addict? Part 2 - by Submitted on Apr 27, 2009 from Peggy FergusonSexual addiction is a dysfunctional pattern of compulsive sexual behavior that continues even after the addict knows that it is causing major problems in their life. The sex addicts has a compulsion to engage in the problem behavior despite the fact that it has become emotionally dissatisfying ...
Views: 1996(1 vote) - Six Super Simple Guidelines for Developing Your Communication Skills By Improving Your Ability to Listen - by Submitted on Nov 05, 2009 from Peggy FergusonBuilding a solid foundation for the development of good communication skills involves learning how to listen effectively. There are several elements of effective listening. These elements include attention, reflection, ability to tolerate tension, and ability to challenge the assumptions that ...
Views: 3844(4 votes) - Addiction and Recovery: Do You Need Detox After Relapse? - by Submitted on Nov 07, 2009 from Peggy FergusonWhile most people realize that relapse is a common experience for addicts in recovery, they often do not know how to get back on track after relapsing on alcohol or other mood altering drugs. Although relapse is commonplace, it is predictable, and thus preventable. For many recovering ...
Views: 6369(3 votes) - Family Dynamics of Addiction Exposed: Identifying The "Real Problem" and What To Do About It - by Submitted on Nov 19, 2009 from Peggy FergusonMany non-addicted spouses complain about how their addicted significant other is driving them crazy, making them depressed, or leading them toward suicide or homicide. These comments only illustrate the destructive nature of the family dynamics of addiction. The addicted and non-addicted ...
Views: 3201(3 votes) - Addiction Recovery Tools: Why You Want to Learn to Forgive in Recovery - by Submitted on Jul 23, 2009 from Peggy FergusonAlthough forgiveness is an important part of working through feelings, and thus, a tool of recovery and the healing process, it is an often neglected topic. People often erroneously equate forgiveness with forgetting. The best definition that I ever heard for forgiveness is simply "giving up ...
Views: 3667(2 votes) - Why People Have Marital Affairs - by Submitted on May 10, 2010 from Peggy FergusonWhy, when most people believe in monogamous marriages, and that affairs are "wrong", are so many couples struggling to recover from infidelity? Most people do not intend to have an affair and most couples never would have believed that it would happen to them. Affairs happen in the marriages of ...
Views: 2419(2 votes) - One More Essential Tool For Preventing Relapse in Early Addiction Recovery - by Submitted on Nov 08, 2009 from Peggy FergusonMost non-addicted people have routines and organizing structures in their lives that help provide stability. An addict's lifestyle is often one of chaotic instability and disorganization. A general lack of structure and routine contributes to this disorganization and chaos. An addicted ...
Views: 3338(4 votes) - Addiction and Recovery - What is Detox? - by Submitted on Jul 23, 2009 from Peggy Ferguson"Detox" is the beginning of the process of recovery. Most people need some kind of help getting through detox. Some people need medical help or additional structure and support. The kinds of difficulties that an alcoholic or addict will have with detox depend on a number of variables, including, ...
Views: 1417(1 vote) - Addiction and Recovery: Do You Really Have to Hit Bottom to Recover? - by Submitted on Jul 25, 2009 from Peggy FergusonThere is a generally misguided notion that you have to "hit bottom" to be able to get sober and stay sober. "Hitting bottom" is usually seen as the loss of the things that you value in your life. It is an individually defined event and the concept has probably hindered the recovery efforts of a ...
Views: 2675(1 vote) - Addiction and Recovery: Preventing Relapse After Surgery - by Submitted on May 19, 2009 from Peggy FergusonYou are ultimately responsible for your own addiction recovery. When you know that you have to have surgery, it is important to keep everyone treating you informed about your recovery and addiction history, including the names of the drugs, the amounts, the lengths of time that you took them, ...
Views: 4438(1 vote) - Addiction and Recovery: Ten Common Myths about Alcohol and Drug Addiction - by Submitted on Jul 25, 2009 from Peggy FergusonPeople who don't know much about alcohol and other drug addiction, often buy into common myths and stereotypes about addiction and addicts. It is important to replace mistaken assumptions and judgments about addiction, so that you can approach those afflicted with the illness, with compassion ...
Views: 4062(1 vote) - Addiction and Recovery: The Emotional Highs and Lows of Early Recovery - by Submitted on Sep 21, 2009 from Peggy FergusonWhen someone makes a decision to get the help that they need to quit drinking and using other drugs, everything begins to change. As an addict’s body begins to detox and as she is consciously trying to interrupt the momentum of addicted use of a chemical (including alcohol), she goes through ...
Views: 4731(2 votes) - Addiction and Recovery: Understanding The Nature of Addiction to Understand Cross Addiction - by Submitted on Jul 29, 2009 from Peggy FergusonEarly addiction recovery is a fragile thing. One of the most frequent contributing factors in relapse is something we call "cross-addiction". Essentially what cross-addiction means, is that if you are alcoholic or addicted to other mood altering drugs, you a potentially addicted to all mood ...
Views: 2754(1 vote) - Don't Let Myths Keep You From Getting Sober - by Submitted on Jul 25, 2009 from Peggy FergusonI keep hearing the same old myths over and over again. And I can't help but think that others hearing these myths either believe them and give up or use them for excuses to avoid taking action on getting clean and sober. One of the myths that I hear daily is that you can't get sober for ...
Views: 1862(1 vote) - Essential Definitions for People Trying to Gain Assertiveness Skills - by Submitted on Nov 07, 2009 from Peggy FergusonAlthough most people have some pretty clear-cut notions about what assertiveness is and isn't, assertiveness is often confused with aggression. Assertiveness is not necessarily about having your will prevail over the will of others. That is actually more descriptive of aggression. Especially ...
Views: 1907(2 votes) - Family Dynamics of Addiction and Recovery - How Can I Tell If My Partner Is Serious about Recovery? - by Submitted on Jul 25, 2009 from Peggy FergusonMost spouses of alcoholics or addicts have been down this road before. Something has happened. Some crisis has gotten the attention of the alcoholic/addict and now he is motivated to get clean and sober. This time he is going to AA/NA and going to counseling. Promises made by the addict to stop ...
Views: 1326(1 vote) - Family Dynamics of Addiction and Recovery: 14 Enabling Behaviors to Quit Now - by Submitted on May 24, 2009 from Peggy FergusonFamily members, in their attempts to solve the problem of a loved one's addiction, try every thing they can think of, to turn the addict's life back around. They usually identify the problem incorrectly for a long time before it becomes obvious to them that addiction is the real problem. ...
Views: 4392(2 votes) - Family Dynamics of Addiction and Recovery: How to Let Go and Regain Your Peace of Mind - by Submitted on May 24, 2009 from Peggy FergusonWhat are you afraid of? Fear and anxiety are part and parcel of daily life with familial addiction. Fear is a paintbrush that colors almost all aspects of family life. Some fears are easily recognizable in an addicted family: "What if he gets arrested?" "When am I going to get the call in the ...
Views: 1627(1 vote) - Family Members Know You are Going to Relapse in Your Addiction Before You Do - Listen Up - by Submitted on Jul 25, 2009 from Peggy FergusonThe family dynamics of recovery is rarely smooth sailing. Relapse, which is a process, has a tremendously negative effect on significant others. Family members who have labored and struggled to remain with the addict through all the active years of addiction, to assist them in finding their way ...
Views: 4677(1 vote) - First Sober Fourth of July: Surviving the Holiday Without Addiction Relapse - by Submitted on Jul 25, 2009 from Peggy FergusonThe fourth of July is significant for alcoholics and addicts in several ways. The Declaration of Independence was a statement of separation from a tyrannical ruler. With separating from the past they embarked on a new way of life. Many people come into treatment just after the Fourth of July, ...
Views: 2859(1 vote) - Getting Started: "Ready, Set, Talk!" - by Submitted on Aug 20, 2010 from Peggy FergusonSometimes couples wish they felt more emotionally close to their spouses. You may feel taken for granted and might even recognize that you take your spouse for granted. One or both of you might be daydreaming about dedicating some time and energy to restoring that eroding emotional connection. ...
Views: 1414(2 votes) - Getting to the Other Side of Grief: Sixteen Helpful Guidelines to Help You Navigate Through Your Grief - by Submitted on Dec 31, 2009 from Peggy FergusonYou may be wondering if it is even possible to survive the loss of someone you love. You may be thinking that you are going crazy, or that you will never quit crying. You may think that you will never be the same and will never feel better. Grief is one of the most devastating experiences ...
Views: 1925(3 votes) - Two Things You Can Do Now To Reduce Your Holiday Stress - by Submitted on Dec 11, 2009 from Peggy FergusonWe know that once Thanksgiving is over, we will be having an increase in our stress. This yearly event, when the demands for our time, energy, money, and other resources increase exponentially, and our stress levels rises accordingly, is lovingly known as "the holidays". And each year, we just ...
Views: 1402(2 votes) - What Can We Do to Improve Our Relationship? Answers from "Ask Peggy" - by Submitted on Nov 06, 2009 from Peggy FergusonCommunication is not only the life's blood of a marriage, it is the cornerstone that the foundation of relationship skills rest on. You have to have good communication skills to be able to convey your love, affection, and commitment to your loved ones. You can not effectively problem solve ...
Views: 2945(3 votes) - Working Through Feelings in Addiction Recovery - by Submitted on Jul 25, 2009 from Peggy FergusonOne of the most important tasks necessary for maintaining abstinence and growing in recovery is learning how to appropriately work through feelings. Many people use alcohol and other drugs in place of dealing with or managing emotions. Alcoholism/drug addiction often involves skill deficits. ...
Views: 8101(1 vote) - Addiction and Recovery: Plan Your Vacation, Not Your Relapse! - by Submitted on Aug 26, 2009 from Peggy FergusonWhen facing the loss of most of one’s structure in situations like vacation or business trips, relapsive thinking can return, even in established, stable recovery. The relapse thoughts can include some of the below, but this is not an all inclusive lists. When planning a vacation or business ...
Views: 3902(2 votes) - Addiction and Recovery: Prevent Relapse By Making Good Choices - by Submitted on Jul 29, 2009 from Peggy FergusonRelapse is a process that occurs over time, in the context of significant decisions. Many people who relapse say that drinking or using was the furthest thing from their mind just before they consumed the chemical. In reality, most of the time, relapse was in process some time before the ...
Views: 4478(2 votes) - Cross Addiction and Relapse - Examples and Relationships - by Submitted on Jul 29, 2009 from Peggy FergusonCross addiction is one of the leading causes of relapse in early recovery. Cross-addiction involves being addicted to all mood altering drugs. The following are illustrations of cross addiction. 1. Some people become cross-addicted in their efforts to camouflage their addiction. ...
Views: 4751(2 votes) - Guide to Eliminating Deception and Dishonesty - How to Get Real in Addiction Recovery - by Submitted on Jul 29, 2009 from Peggy FergusonMany people, while active in addiction, engage in deceptive, dishonest behavior, and diversionary tactics. These are part and parcel of addiction and the need to keep the extent of their problem hidden. It is difficult to juggle all the demands of being addicted with all the "normal" demands of ...
Views: 7164(2 votes) - Six guidelines on how to improve your patience and tolerance for your family during the holidays - by Submitted on Dec 11, 2009 from Peggy FergusonMost people experience a great deal of stress in that period of time between Thanksgiving and New Years, fondly known as “The Holidays”. Many of us, find ourselves becoming irritable, with our patience and tolerance stretched to the limit. Much of the impatience and intolerance involves ...
Views: 6426(7 votes) - Addiction and Recovery: Drinking or Using Dreams as a Normal Part of Recovery - by Submitted on Aug 04, 2009 from Peggy FergusonWhen you have a drinking or using dream, you may wake up not really knowing if it actually happened. Many people in early recovery find it disturbing and frightening when they experience a "using" dream. Drinking and using dreams are those dreams where the central theme or experience is about ...
Views: 4746(2 votes)