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Articles from Peggy Ferguson | Selfgrowth.com
- Addiction and Recovery: How to Catapult Your Recovery to the Next Level by Using A Problems Checklist to Drive Skill Developmen - by Submitted on Sep 20, 2009 from Peggy FergusonEarly recovery is a time of self-assessment and problem identification. You have to know what is not working in order to begin to fix it. One of the first tasks, right after learning basic craving management techniques is spending the time and energy to identify the roles that chemicals have ...
Views: 2550(1 vote) - How to Overcome Seven Obstacles to New Year's Resolutions Success - by Submitted on Dec 31, 2009 from Peggy FergusonI love the New Year. I feel like I am the threshold of a new year. I am glad that there is a week between Christmas and the New Year because it gives me a chance to recover, regroup, and rethink. Of course, I would like to think of a new year as a fresh, blank, Big Chief Tablet to write ...
Views: 2535(2 votes) - Addiction in Ongoing Recovery: Getting Acquainted With Middle Ground - by Submitted on Aug 04, 2011 from Peggy FergusonThe main task of early recovery is spent in trying to interrupt the momentum of the addiction to achieve sustained abstinence. Most of one's mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual energy is spent on that goal. In ongoing, stable, sustained recovery, the recovering person is no longer ...
Views: 2462(1 vote) - Why People Have Marital Affairs - by Submitted on May 10, 2010 from Peggy FergusonWhy, when most people believe in monogamous marriages, and that affairs are "wrong", are so many couples struggling to recover from infidelity? Most people do not intend to have an affair and most couples never would have believed that it would happen to them. Affairs happen in the marriages of ...
Views: 2419(2 votes) - Your Spouse's Infidelity Revealed: Of Course You Are Angry and Scared: Part 1 - by Submitted on May 18, 2009 from Peggy FergusonInfidelity can be a component of sexual addiction or relational event(s). It is generally enshrouded in secrecy and dishonesty, with great amounts of time and effort spent to keep it hidden. Spouses find out about the infidelity or sexual addiction in a wide variety of ways. Several are ...
Views: 2395 - Falling Out of Love - Should We Pack It In? - by Submitted on Aug 04, 2010 from Peggy FergusonOften when a couple comes in for couple’s counseling, one of the partners is stating that s/he has fallen out of love with the other partner. Sometimes they both feel that way, but usually it is just one spouse verbalizing this. When you are feeling this way, it is common to question whether ...
Views: 2387 - A Realistic Approach to Reducing Unhappiness and Preventing Divorce - by Submitted on Jan 30, 2010 from Peggy FergusonWhile many conflicted and combative couples stay together through the holidays to not disappoint the kids or the extended family members, other couples who may have not even been thinking about divorce, begin to feel discouraged, disappointed, and disenchanted after the holidays and decide to ...
Views: 2311 - Standing At The Crossroads: Trying to Quit Using Drugs - by Submitted on Nov 19, 2010 from Peggy FergusonPeople do not easily come to the conclusion that they have an alcohol or other drug problem. The telltale signs have been there quite some time. Addiction carries with it its own camouflage devices. It can look like a lot of other illnesses from the perspective of an outsider looking in. ...
Views: 2245(2 votes) - The Naked Truth About Sexual Addiction - by Submitted on May 08, 2009 from Peggy FergusonThere is nothing sexy about sex addiction. Compulsive sexual behavior is not a pastime or hobby. Sexually addicted people use all kinds of excuses and defense mechanisms to deny the truth to themselves. The naked truth about addiction is that once it is addiction, the addict is spiritually and ...
Views: 2160 - Addiction As Disease Does Not Equal "Get Out of Jail Free" - by Submitted on Aug 04, 2009 from Peggy FergusonSometimes family members have a hard time with the idea that addiction is a disease. When this is the case, it often has to do with the issue of responsibility. Sometimes family members believe that "disease" is equated with a "get out of jail free card" or not being held responsible. This is ...
Views: 2156(2 votes) - Addiction and Recovery: Why Don't They Just Quit? - by Submitted on Feb 03, 2011 from Peggy FergusonFamily members are often stymied about how their alcoholic/addicted family member can continue to drink or use in the face of overwhelming evidence that the chemical is destroying their lives. “Why don’t they just quit?” is a question that could rightfully top the list of “FAQs by Family ...
Views: 2020(2 votes) - Sexual Addiction: Are You a Sex Addict? Part 2 - by Submitted on Apr 27, 2009 from Peggy FergusonSexual addiction is a dysfunctional pattern of compulsive sexual behavior that continues even after the addict knows that it is causing major problems in their life. The sex addicts has a compulsion to engage in the problem behavior despite the fact that it has become emotionally dissatisfying ...
Views: 1996(1 vote) - Are You Suffering from Someone Else's Sexual Addiction? - Part 4 - by Submitted on Jul 23, 2009 from Peggy FergusonAre you angry, depressed, confused, and constantly trying to figure out what your spouse is up to? If you are spinning your wheels, trying to strategize and find solutions for your spouse and your relationship before you have actually identified the problem, keep reading. Family members can ...
Views: 1977 - Everyone Loses When You Give Up on Your Marriage Without Trying to Acquire the Skills You Need To Keep It - by Submitted on Aug 20, 2010 from Peggy FergusonThere is the "should" that says that you should be able to solve your own problems without help. Here is the rationale: "If your relationship has enough tension and strain that help is needed, the relationship is not going to make it anyway, so why waste time and money with counseling?" The ...
Views: 1959 - How to Separate the Help From The Hype In Addiction Treatment - by Submitted on Sep 22, 2010 from Peggy FergusonThere is so much "information" on the internet about addiction and recovery and unless you already have some knowledge about addiction and recovery, all resources may appear equal to you. This is not the case. There are advertisements, articles, and blog posts about addiction recovery ...
Views: 1932(2 votes) - Getting to the Other Side of Grief: Sixteen Helpful Guidelines to Help You Navigate Through Your Grief - by Submitted on Dec 31, 2009 from Peggy FergusonYou may be wondering if it is even possible to survive the loss of someone you love. You may be thinking that you are going crazy, or that you will never quit crying. You may think that you will never be the same and will never feel better. Grief is one of the most devastating experiences ...
Views: 1925(3 votes) - Essential Definitions for People Trying to Gain Assertiveness Skills - by Submitted on Nov 07, 2009 from Peggy FergusonAlthough most people have some pretty clear-cut notions about what assertiveness is and isn't, assertiveness is often confused with aggression. Assertiveness is not necessarily about having your will prevail over the will of others. That is actually more descriptive of aggression. Especially ...
Views: 1907(2 votes) - Don't Let Myths Keep You From Getting Sober - by Submitted on Jul 25, 2009 from Peggy FergusonI keep hearing the same old myths over and over again. And I can't help but think that others hearing these myths either believe them and give up or use them for excuses to avoid taking action on getting clean and sober. One of the myths that I hear daily is that you can't get sober for ...
Views: 1862(1 vote) - Getting Married: Building Healthy Step-families - by Submitted on Aug 19, 2010 from Peggy FergusonIf your family is a "remarried family" or a "step-family" then you're in good company. The experience of building a remarried or stepfamily is a common experience, not only for recovering people, but for the general population as well. There are lots of difficulties involved in putting together ...
Views: 1801(4 votes) - Family Dynamics of Addiction And Recovery - Deciding What to do about an Adult Child's Addiction - by Submitted on Jul 25, 2009 from Peggy FergusonWhen an adult child with addiction problems lives with his parents, those parents are faced with hard choices. The addict believes that he is only harming himself, yet the truth is that the addiction is hurting everyone and is typically tearing the family apart. Parents and significant others ...
Views: 1786(2 votes) - Keep Your Parents and Children Out of Your Marriage - by Submitted on Aug 19, 2010 from Peggy FergusonKeep your parents and your children out of your marriage. Once they are in there, it's hard to get them out. When you are in conflict with your spouse, it is really tempting to use whoever is handy to vent to, regarding your marriage. And often the people available most available to us are ...
Views: 1743 - Help My Teen: Could Your Child's Problems Be Due to Addiction? - by Submitted on Jun 04, 2010 from Peggy FergusonParents often find themselves in a quandary trying to figure out how to help the adolescent whose behavior, disposition, and mood has changed for the worst. The exact nature of the problem may be eluding them. They use a trial and error problem solving method where they end up trying anything ...
Views: 1709(3 votes) - Using Valentine's Day to Build Your Own Marriage Enrichment Initiative - by Submitted on Feb 06, 2011 from Peggy FergusonRoutine. Boring. Settled in. Comfortable. You love your spouse. You believe that she and the family are the most important people in your life. You have settled into a comfortable routine, accepting that you are loved and appreciated by your family. Your comfortable routine consists of an ...
Views: 1664 - Family Dynamics of Addiction and Recovery: How to Let Go and Regain Your Peace of Mind - by Submitted on May 24, 2009 from Peggy FergusonWhat are you afraid of? Fear and anxiety are part and parcel of daily life with familial addiction. Fear is a paintbrush that colors almost all aspects of family life. Some fears are easily recognizable in an addicted family: "What if he gets arrested?" "When am I going to get the call in the ...
Views: 1627(1 vote) - Addiction and Recovery - What is Detox? - by Submitted on Jul 23, 2009 from Peggy Ferguson"Detox" is the beginning of the process of recovery. Most people need some kind of help getting through detox. Some people need medical help or additional structure and support. The kinds of difficulties that an alcoholic or addict will have with detox depend on a number of variables, including, ...
Views: 1417(1 vote) - Getting Started: "Ready, Set, Talk!" - by Submitted on Aug 20, 2010 from Peggy FergusonSometimes couples wish they felt more emotionally close to their spouses. You may feel taken for granted and might even recognize that you take your spouse for granted. One or both of you might be daydreaming about dedicating some time and energy to restoring that eroding emotional connection. ...
Views: 1414(2 votes) - Two Things You Can Do Now To Reduce Your Holiday Stress - by Submitted on Dec 11, 2009 from Peggy FergusonWe know that once Thanksgiving is over, we will be having an increase in our stress. This yearly event, when the demands for our time, energy, money, and other resources increase exponentially, and our stress levels rises accordingly, is lovingly known as "the holidays". And each year, we just ...
Views: 1402(2 votes) - How to Find The Best Marriage Counselor For Your Needs - by Submitted on Feb 05, 2011 from Peggy FergusonEveryone wants "the best". When you are looking for a marriage counselor it is important to find someone who is specifically trained in marriage counseling and has the credential of "licensed" or "certified" marriage counselor". This indicates that they demonstrated some level of competence ...
Views: 1398 - Marital Counseling: How to Make The Most of the Opportunities of Marriage Counseling - by Submitted on May 18, 2010 from Peggy FergusonPeople seek marriage counseling because they need help or are in pain. In any given couple, there is usually one who is more interested in counseling than the other. With a list of complaints, each partner usually feels compelled to make his/her case to the counselor about their spouse being ...
Views: 1371(1 vote) - Family Dynamics of Addiction and Recovery - How Can I Tell If My Partner Is Serious about Recovery? - by Submitted on Jul 25, 2009 from Peggy FergusonMost spouses of alcoholics or addicts have been down this road before. Something has happened. Some crisis has gotten the attention of the alcoholic/addict and now he is motivated to get clean and sober. This time he is going to AA/NA and going to counseling. Promises made by the addict to stop ...
Views: 1326(1 vote) - Help For the Sex Addict - Part 3 - by Submitted on May 10, 2009 from Peggy FergusonTreatment for sexual addiction can occur in an inpatient or outpatient setting. Like treatment for alcohol and other drug (AOD) addiction, treatment for sexual addiction is usually made up of individual and group counseling, education about addiction, and self-help participation. When choosing ...
Views: 1292 - The Key To Successful Recovery of Your Marriage Is Within You - by Submitted on Aug 07, 2011 from Peggy FergusonThe key to successfully recovering the love that has eroded is within you. The fun that you once shared together can happen again. The robust sense of "us" that colored the choices you made on a daily basis can be restored. The ability to accomplish these things is within each partner. The ...
Views: 1249 - Getting Started: "Ready, Set, Talk!" - by Submitted on Aug 20, 2010 from Peggy FergusonSometimes couples wish they felt more emotionally close to their spouses. You may feel taken for granted and might even recognize that you take your spouse for granted. One or both of you might be daydreaming about dedicating some time and energy to restoring that eroding emotional connection. ...
Views: 1076(1 vote) - Commumication In Recovery: Guidelines for Setting the Stage for Effective Talks with Your Loved Ones - by Submitted on May 24, 2009 from Peggy FergusonWhen you want to solve some important relationship or logistics issue, you help assist help ensure your effectiveness by appropriately setting the stage for communication. Remember these guidelines while trying to solve a problem in your relationship. 1. Think about what you want to say ...
Views: 951(1 vote)