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Articles from Lynette Crane | Selfgrowth.com
- Are you a highly sensitive person? - by Submitted on Jun 12, 2013 from Lynette CraneAre you one of those people who startles easily? Finds that you’re running a little too fast or being a little too concerned at what later look like minor events? You’re not crazy, you’re not alone, and it’s not your imagination, nor is it a lack of self control, as you may have imagined (or ...
Views: 945(1 vote) - Pick yourself up, dust yourself off… - by Submitted on Feb 12, 2014 from Lynette CraneMaking a mistake or doing something klutzy can make anyone uncomfortable. Some people are more uncomfortable than others, going home, pulling the covers over their heads, and trying to sleep, haunted over and over by pictures of the embarrassing incident. Others apologize lightly and gracefully, ...
Views: 947(1 vote) - Are you bothered by public speaking? - by Submitted on Feb 28, 2013 from Lynette CraneYour work or life may require speaking in public. Some people think of public speaking as delivering a talk to a large audience; others think that two or more people constitute a large enough audience to be intimidating. Are you one of the rare people who is frightened of public speaking? ...
Views: 1019(1 vote) - Stress and Your Health - by Submitted on Mar 28, 2012 from Lynette CraneIn my last article, I talked about “stress stupidity” and how it causes us to make mistakes and lose time. It actually does more than that: A recently released Yale University study, published online the week of January 9, 2012, in the journal Biological Psychiatry, shows that stress ...
Views: 755(1 vote) - Stress – it’s a matter of choice - by Submitted on Jul 31, 2012 from Lynette CraneIt’s time for a reminder about the basics of good stress management, and especially about the skills you can easily master that will make you more stress-resistant – i.e., less likely to develop a stress response that you have to “handle.” Life should be about more than just “handling” negative ...
Views: 866(1 vote) - Why do some people just seem to have all the luck? - by Submitted on Jun 13, 2011 from Lynette CraneEarlier in my life, I was bemused at the sight of a number of people who had talent and persistence, but never seemed to get the break that allowed them to display that talent. At the same time, it was puzzling to see much less qualified people rise to the top. Not always, not even very often, ...
Views: 1218(1 vote) - Bullying in the Workplace: Who Bullies Whom? - by Submitted on Jun 04, 2015 from Lynette CraneOver 40% of employees in the workplace have experienced bullying, a persistent pattern of behavior that intimidates, degrades or otherwise undermines the wellbeing of the target. Bullying is four times more prevalent than sexual abuse, and, according to a study at the University of Manitoba, the ...
Views: 1272 - How can I soar with eagles when I work with turkeys? - by Submitted on Mar 06, 2013 from Lynette CraneI remember this sign in an organization for which I worked years ago, and when I thought of some of my colleagues, I laughed in recognition. Much later, I recognized that some of them probably had my face in mind when they looked at the sign and laughed. The expression refers to someone ...
Views: 1191 - Two small steps towards speaking confidence - by Submitted on Jan 28, 2014 from Lynette CraneIf you are one of those people who feels uncomfortable about speaking up in group settings, take heart. It is possible to learn to be a relaxed contributor. One of my early clients said, “Oh, I know what you’re going to say – just take a deep breath and force yourself.” Well, no, actually. ...
Views: 871 - What does confidence have to do with your heart? - by Submitted on Feb 20, 2013 from Lynette CraneConfident people know when to be afraid; they then take action – to run away from the saber-toothed tiger, leave the burning building, or whatever. Unconfident, or socially anxious, people, on the other hand, are wracked by numerous anxieties over what are called “paper tigers”: fears about how ...
Views: 936 - 3 Time Expansion Tips for Introvert - by Submitted on Jun 17, 2014 from Lynette CraneIntroverts often feel harried, trying to rush towards that time when they can kick back and relax, freed from all social – and other—obligation. This is especially true when the introvert works in a busy organization where much of what happens is not under the introvert’s control (unlike a ...
Views: 950 - A New Year, a New Life - by Submitted on Jan 14, 2014 from Lynette CraneJanuary is the time of fresh starts, fresh ideas, and an urge to create a new, better life.Often, we start out with high hopes, only to sink by February 1 as if the balloon carrying our hopes had been punctured. We need a plan, a roadmap if you will, that we can follow, that will provide us ...
Views: 975 - Are Introverts just too quiet? - by Submitted on Feb 25, 2014 from Lynette CraneI hear it often – in person, from clients, on the internet – “I’m told I’m too quiet, and need to speak out more.” I’ve had more than one client whose job review included that feedback. And the client says to me, “But I only speak when I really have something to say – and then it’s overlooked or ...
Views: 867 - Are you afraid of success … or is it something else? - by Submitted on Mar 11, 2013 from Lynette CraneHas someone suggested to you that you fear success? Or have you thought it about yourself? If so, what is it you are really afraid of? I had to think about this some years ago, when I was starting out as a speaker. An enthusiastic and supportive friend of mine would say, frequently, “Maybe ...
Views: 1131 - Are you carrying some introvert baggage? - by Submitted on May 19, 2013 from Lynette CraneMany people do; some of them are introverts, the others are extroverts. The basic definition of an introvert is of someone who is very sensitive to external stimulation and needs to withdraw periodically because our energy is depleted by too much stimulation, whereas an extrovert is someone ...
Views: 852 - Are you determined not to age? - by Submitted on Oct 31, 2012 from Lynette CraneWe live in a youth-oriented society, where the fastest growing group, the Baby Boomers, learned, “Never trust anyone over thirty.” They’ve probably extended that limit by now; I haven’t checked recently to see what it is. 60? 70? We see ads everywhere for products and services to erase ...
Views: 770 - Are you listening to your body? - by Submitted on Sep 28, 2012 from Lynette CraneThere’s an old story about a city slicker watching a farmer begin to train a mule. First, the farmer picked up a two-by-four and hit the mule over the head. Then he did it again … and again. The city slicker finally said, “I don’t get it. What are you trying to teach him?” The farmer replied, ...
Views: 815 - Are your Bragging Rights killing you? - by Submitted on Sep 19, 2013 from Lynette Crane“I never eat lunch,” “I work 12 hours a day,” “I only get about 4 hours of sleep a night – oh, I don’t need any more; I feel just fine.” “Weekend? What’s a weekend?” I hear these statements all the time from people whose body language and facial expressions show that they are pleased, even ...
Views: 843 - Be a Good Samaritan and Reduce Your Stress - by Submitted on Jun 21, 2012 from Lynette CraneThe stress response in our bodies might be thought of, from one point of view, as the result of a combat between two opposing parts of the nervous system. The sympathetic division, triggered in response to a perceived threat, is responsible for the increased heart rate, higher blood pressure, ...
Views: 935 - Becoming a socially connected introvert – without exhausting yourself - by Submitted on May 23, 2014 from Lynette CraneI read the introverts forums, I watch the comments, and I feel a little dismayed. “Why won’t people leave me alone?” “I don’t like small talk, so I avoid people.” “Being around people is just so exhausting that I spend all my free time alone.” “I hate even the thought of networking.” One gets ...
Views: 1084 - Business Coaching and Introverts - by Submitted on Nov 27, 2015 from Lynette CraneWhen you hire a business coach and develop a program or product, the first marketing instructions you get will probably be something like this: “Contact your friends, send them a warm letter, offer them your services or product, and ask them if they know people who would be interested.” Bingo! ...
Views: 1308 - Can an introvert have an exciting life and survive? - by Submitted on Jul 01, 2014 from Lynette CraneYes, many do. Many do not. Performers are, surprisingly often, introverts, because performing provides a perfect platform for an introvert. A performance usually involves a structured situation with behavior that is well-rehearsed; furthermore, we can usually perform without those ...
Views: 956 - Can I be an introvert and a champion too? - by Submitted on Aug 14, 2012 from Lynette CraneThe short answer is, You Bet! Too many people equate introversion with shyness, when in fact introverts are simply people who rely more on inner resources than outer ones, and deeply need a certain amount of solitude in which to re-charge their batteries. Introversion may lie behind ...
Views: 1284 - Can you change the past? - by Submitted on May 13, 2013 from Lynette CraneCan you go back and change the past, or are you stuck with what you remember? That’s the key: what you remember. The fact is, our brains are stuffed with memories, only some of which we retrieve, convincing ourselves we have a true and complete picture of the past when in fact we have a ...
Views: 965 - Choose Your Foods and Choose Your Moods - by Submitted on Dec 03, 2013 from Lynette CraneThe holidays can be a time of moods that go up and down. It’s easy to assume that changing moods are the result of what happens to you, or worse yet, just something that comes over you without any explanation whatsoever. Wouldn’t you like to have a way to choose how you feel? A way that works ...
Views: 862 - Creative Writing for RAWs - by Submitted on Aug 29, 2011 from Lynette CraneSome years ago, I called a dear friend of mine, Mary, to ask her advice. All I got was her answering machine, hour after hour. Alarmed that this usually accessible person didn’t seem to be available, I called her best friend, Amy. Together, we become more alarmed. Both of us started making ...
Views: 1029 - Do you know where your Will Power has gone? - by Submitted on Jan 31, 2013 from Lynette CraneYou know will power – that elusive stuff that other people seem to have, but you don’t? Or maybe you had a lot of it on January 1, excited by visions of a new you, but somehow the visions have gotten dimmer as the weeks have gone by. The parking lot at the fitness center was so crowded on New ...
Views: 947 - Does persistence really pay off? - by Submitted on Aug 22, 2011 from Lynette CraneWe’ve heard these phrases all of our lives: “Persistence pays off”, “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again”, and “Success comes the day after you give up.” But are they really true? If you’re feeling tired, despondent and burned out, you may wonder just how long you have to persist ...
Views: 1375 - Evaluating Other People - by Submitted on Jun 14, 2012 from Lynette CraneBuild relationships and teams by giving value to your interaction This is the last of a series of articles on handling criticism constructively and without stress. Evaluating other people is something you will do all of your life, both formally, as a teacher, parent, or manager, and ...
Views: 955 - Feedback - by Submitted on May 31, 2012 from Lynette CraneHow often do you criticize yourself during a given day? How often do you hold yourself back from doing or saying something because you’re afraid you will make a mistake? Then you’d receive that awful thing, criticism – if not from yourself, then from someone else. None of us wants to live in ...
Views: 905 - Handling criticism from other people: Go for the gain and not the pain - by Submitted on Jun 11, 2012 from Lynette CraneIn my previous article, I talked about the difference between feedback and criticism, and how we can handle our own inner voices more constructively. But what about those outer voices? That’s the topic of this article. Into each life a little rain must fall. Into each life a little – or ...
Views: 945 - Handling the stress of rejection - by Submitted on Feb 16, 2012 from Lynette CraneRejection can cause a particularly deep form of anger, because rejection seems to carry with it a heavy load: loss of self-esteem, and even of identity. Rejection can also result in depression. Sometimes it takes this shock of rejection to make you realize that you may have been asking for ...
Views: 769 - Hassles and the havoc they can create - by Submitted on Apr 19, 2012 from Lynette CraneIn the movies, we have often seen a character receive a shock, clutch his heart, and fall to the ground in a heart attack. No one thinks life’s daily hassles are dramatic, but in fact they can be just as deadly as a major shock. Real crises, such as having your house burn down, activate ...
Views: 743 - Have you ever had a psychological sucker punch? - by Submitted on May 27, 2013 from Lynette CraneHave you ever had someone explain to you, coldly and logically, why your dream or vision is impossible, and can never come true? Well, I have. Most recently last week. As it happens, I had stopped focusing on my stress management programs during the last year, while I finished my book, The ...
Views: 1082 - Healthful Holiday Hints - by Submitted on Nov 21, 2012 from Lynette CraneThe holidays are a particular challenge for those of us who know we must be vigilant every day to maintain our health through good eating. But everyone needs to be careful not to put on weight that is going to be hard to lose later on, or worse yet, develop a health problem. Here are some of the ...
Views: 794 - Highly-educated, highly-intelligent people can do incredibly stupid things - by Submitted on Mar 16, 2012 from Lynette CraneStress can make even intelligent people screw up, look slightly crazy, and even undermine their health and well-being. It’s true: even highly-educated, highly-intelligent people can do incredibly stupid things under stress. Take the woman, who upon finding that her house was on fire, grabbed ...
Views: 1507 - Holding on to your identity during a transition? - by Submitted on Sep 08, 2015 from Lynette CraneMaybe you shouldn’t be. Transitions – in life or in career – are tough. One of the hardest parts is the seeming attack on your identity when you no longer fill a given role, a role you may have played for years, even decades. People who have had to change careers for physical or health ...
Views: 1262 - Holiday Hints at the Buffet for the Heart-wise - by Submitted on Nov 23, 2011 from Lynette CraneThe holidays are a particular challenge for those of us who know we must be vigilant every day to maintain our health through good eating. (Actually, that’s pretty much everybody.) Here are some of the challenges, and how to meet them. The holiday party, with its buffet of delectable treats, ...
Views: 582 - How A Little Stress Leads to More Stress …and what to do about it - by Submitted on Dec 15, 2010 from Lynette CraneA little stress goes a long way, because it leads to more stress, until you don’t know how to stop the whole process. But there is some good news. An estimated 10% of stress is due to what happens to us such as job loss, accidents, major damage to our home, to ourselves or to a loved ...
Views: 682 - How Can You Laugh When Your World Isn’t Funny? - by Submitted on Jun 18, 2011 from Lynette Crane“What do the simple folk do, to help them escape when they’re blue”, sang the King in the Broadway musical, Camelot. He felt someone had the secret, but he did not. It’s difficult to force yourself to laugh, and annoying if someone else urges you to do so when you don’t feel like it. But ...
Views: 1107 - How Guilt Undermines Your January Resolutions - by Submitted on Jan 18, 2011 from Lynette CraneA professor of mine used to remark, ”The perfectly scientific life is impossible to lead.” You will sometimes fail to follow guidelines for good health. You will feel too tired to exercise, and you may be right. You can be so tired that you are more likely to have an accident or injure ...
Views: 588 - How not to motivate introverts? - by Submitted on Jul 18, 2014 from Lynette CraneIntroverts: We’re 51% of the population, and still people don’t get who we are and how we function best. We are in your workplace as employees, colleagues, managers, bosses. We can be a family member, child, lover, or friend. We are definitely well represented among your clients and ...
Views: 1049 - How Stress Makes You Stupid …and what you can do about it! - by Submitted on Dec 10, 2010 from Lynette CraneStress makes you stupid. It sooner or later makes all of us stupid. I can prove it. So can you. Think back to the last time you rushed get to the post office before it closed to mail a package, only to discover when you got there that the package was back on your desk; or rushing to an ...
Views: 826 - How to Avoid Holiday Stress Insanity - by Submitted on Nov 26, 2013 from Lynette CraneAlong with joy and a feeling of connectedness to others, the holidays bring a rise in stress. Although most people over 30 experience a rise in stress over the holidays, according to the American Psychological Association, women are most likely to experience a sharp increase (44%) in stress, ...
Views: 1009 - Introversion, Gut Feelings, and Trust - by Submitted on Jan 20, 2015 from Lynette CraneMaybe – just maybe – your gut-level feeling that you shouldn’t be doing something is right. But if you’re an introvert, you’ve probably had a lifetime of being told to ignore your feelings, and urged to act just the opposite. Want to stay home and read? “What’s the matter with you, anyway?” ...
Views: 1068 - Introvert Anger: The Good, The Bad, and The Downright Ugly - by Submitted on Sep 26, 2014 from Lynette CraneAre you an introvert? Afraid of anger? Your own and other people’s? You’re not alone. We introverts are famous for becoming clams when we’re hurt or affronted. After all, anger can involve raised voices, threatening language – all that over-stimulation against which we try to protect ...
Views: 3569 - Introvert Nervousness – Friend or Foe? - by Submitted on Nov 19, 2014 from Lynette Crane“I’m now able to give a talk in public, but I’m still nervous. I guess I won’t ever get over it.” The speaker was a woman in one of my seminars, and the topic was introversion and public speaking. Her assumption was that because she was an introvert, nervousness was always there, ready to ...
Views: 942 - Is anybody listening? - by Submitted on Apr 04, 2012 from Lynette CraneOne common stressor is the feeling that we are trying to get others to understand our needs and our points of view, but somehow, no matter how hard we try, the message isn’t getting through. The solution to this stress? Try to understand the needs of your listener; then shape your ...
Views: 743 - Is Introversion Main Stream at Last? - by Submitted on Aug 10, 2016 from Lynette CraneThe topic of introversion has now entered the mainstream. How can I tell? This topic, which I have championed for so many years (full disclosure: I am an introvert), has now appeared in one of my favorite comic strips, and I honestly don’t know whether to laugh or cry. In the Dilbert strip ...
Views: 1274 - Is relaxation time impossible for you to find? - by Submitted on Sep 07, 2012 from Lynette CraneDo you find yourself rushing all day, hoping to save some time at the end of the day in which to relax? Only to find that the time you “saved” by rushing wasn’t to be found later on? Perhaps your day is filled with “must do or else” activities that make it difficult for you to find time to slow ...
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