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Articles from Lynette Crane | Selfgrowth.com
- Handling criticism from other people: Go for the gain and not the pain - by Submitted on Jun 11, 2012 from Lynette CraneIn my previous article, I talked about the difference between feedback and criticism, and how we can handle our own inner voices more constructively. But what about those outer voices? That’s the topic of this article. Into each life a little rain must fall. Into each life a little – or ...
Views: 945 - Introvert Nervousness – Friend or Foe? - by Submitted on Nov 19, 2014 from Lynette Crane“I’m now able to give a talk in public, but I’m still nervous. I guess I won’t ever get over it.” The speaker was a woman in one of my seminars, and the topic was introversion and public speaking. Her assumption was that because she was an introvert, nervousness was always there, ready to ...
Views: 942 - What does confidence have to do with your heart? - by Submitted on Feb 20, 2013 from Lynette CraneConfident people know when to be afraid; they then take action – to run away from the saber-toothed tiger, leave the burning building, or whatever. Unconfident, or socially anxious, people, on the other hand, are wracked by numerous anxieties over what are called “paper tigers”: fears about how ...
Views: 936 - Be a Good Samaritan and Reduce Your Stress - by Submitted on Jun 21, 2012 from Lynette CraneThe stress response in our bodies might be thought of, from one point of view, as the result of a combat between two opposing parts of the nervous system. The sympathetic division, triggered in response to a perceived threat, is responsible for the increased heart rate, higher blood pressure, ...
Views: 935 - Is Stress a Choice? Or a Habit? - by Submitted on Jun 19, 2013 from Lynette CraneWe often say that stress isn’t just something that happens to you, it’s a choice you make about how to react to what happens to you. In a sense this is true, but it is an unconscious choice. You’re not only unaware that you’re making a choice, but even that there are any other ...
Views: 934 - Who do you share your pain with? - by Submitted on Jun 26, 2013 from Lynette CraneWe all know, intuitively, what research tells us: we need companions in life with whom to share both our joys and our pains. People who do not have anyone with whom to share tend to lead more stressful, less healthy lives. Unfortunately, not everyone is an ideal companion for such sharing. ...
Views: 934 - Planning to take a risk - by Submitted on May 25, 2012 from Lynette Crane(Last week I discussed the reasons for taking a risk, and the preparation for doing so. This week’s article continues with planned steps to gain the most from taking the risk, while minimizing the stress.) General George Patton once said,“Take calculated risks; that is quite different from ...
Views: 923 - Who’s writing your life script? - by Submitted on Apr 08, 2013 from Lynette CraneWe all live our lives based on assumptions – beliefs we are sure are true about what we are capable of doing, what is acceptable for us to do, and what we think is inevitable. So where do those assumptions come from? I thought of this while attending a play last week. The central ...
Views: 921 - What the heck is virtual learning? - by Submitted on Mar 30, 2013 from Lynette CraneI meet people all the time who don’t really understand virtual learning, and are therefore wary of signing up for anything that is presented in this way. What a shame; there is so much expertise out there that you can access once you become familiar with this increasingly popular method of ...
Views: 915 - Feedback - by Submitted on May 31, 2012 from Lynette CraneHow often do you criticize yourself during a given day? How often do you hold yourself back from doing or saying something because you’re afraid you will make a mistake? Then you’d receive that awful thing, criticism – if not from yourself, then from someone else. None of us wants to live in ...
Views: 905 - What is life was a multiple choice test? - by Submitted on Jul 30, 2013 from Lynette CraneIf life was a multiple choice test, would you always pick the same answer? “Let’s see, it’s choice B. Guess I’ll go with that all the way.” At least in a real multiple choice test, you can see all choices – usually four – laid out and you may even ponder them before you mark your ...
Views: 901 - Networking Is A Life Skill - by Submitted on Jul 26, 2016 from Lynette CraneI hear it over and over again: “I can’t network. I’m an introvert.” “I don’t know what to say.” “I don’t want to brag.” A lot of people don’t like networking, but the bulk of them seem to be introverts. I’m an introvert, too, and I’m also an entrepreneur, having to teach myself along the way ...
Views: 882 - Persistent Perfectionism - by Submitted on Nov 08, 2011 from Lynette CraneDefeat Time and Energy Bandits Time and energy bandits are habits and thought processes that can suck you dry, leaving you exhausted and harried. One of these, which particularly rears its head at the holiday season, is perfectionism. Now perfectionism is a wonderful trait – in its ...
Views: 882 - Rose sniffing - by Submitted on May 05, 2012 from Lynette CraneWe had a lovely speaker return to my women’s group last week. She is an expert on women’s health, and once again she provided us with arcane and useful information that we could have gotten nowhere else. She did it with such gentle grace and humor that we felt soothed and refreshed at the end ...
Views: 878 - Two small steps towards speaking confidence - by Submitted on Jan 28, 2014 from Lynette CraneIf you are one of those people who feels uncomfortable about speaking up in group settings, take heart. It is possible to learn to be a relaxed contributor. One of my early clients said, “Oh, I know what you’re going to say – just take a deep breath and force yourself.” Well, no, actually. ...
Views: 871 - Are Introverts just too quiet? - by Submitted on Feb 25, 2014 from Lynette CraneI hear it often – in person, from clients, on the internet – “I’m told I’m too quiet, and need to speak out more.” I’ve had more than one client whose job review included that feedback. And the client says to me, “But I only speak when I really have something to say – and then it’s overlooked or ...
Views: 867 - Stress – it’s a matter of choice - by Submitted on Jul 31, 2012 from Lynette CraneIt’s time for a reminder about the basics of good stress management, and especially about the skills you can easily master that will make you more stress-resistant – i.e., less likely to develop a stress response that you have to “handle.” Life should be about more than just “handling” negative ...
Views: 866(1 vote) - Choose Your Foods and Choose Your Moods - by Submitted on Dec 03, 2013 from Lynette CraneThe holidays can be a time of moods that go up and down. It’s easy to assume that changing moods are the result of what happens to you, or worse yet, just something that comes over you without any explanation whatsoever. Wouldn’t you like to have a way to choose how you feel? A way that works ...
Views: 862 - Just Breathing - by Submitted on Oct 26, 2011 from Lynette CranePause, breathe, choose: I remind my clients (and myself) of this sequence frequently, adding that the response we make to a stressful event is our choice, not a given. To reach the point where we recognize other choices, it is important to be able to distance ourselves from the world and ...
Views: 854 - Are you carrying some introvert baggage? - by Submitted on May 19, 2013 from Lynette CraneMany people do; some of them are introverts, the others are extroverts. The basic definition of an introvert is of someone who is very sensitive to external stimulation and needs to withdraw periodically because our energy is depleted by too much stimulation, whereas an extrovert is someone ...
Views: 852 - Want to know the best way to save your life? - by Submitted on Jun 03, 2013 from Lynette CraneIf you could do one thing right now to reduce stress, would you do it? Or would your overly-crowded life – too much to do, a loved one’s demands are more important than your needs, your job requires you to keep on working so hard – take over?Well, here is the secret to a healthier, happier ...
Views: 850 - Are your Bragging Rights killing you? - by Submitted on Sep 19, 2013 from Lynette Crane“I never eat lunch,” “I work 12 hours a day,” “I only get about 4 hours of sleep a night – oh, I don’t need any more; I feel just fine.” “Weekend? What’s a weekend?” I hear these statements all the time from people whose body language and facial expressions show that they are pleased, even ...
Views: 843 - How Stress Makes You Stupid …and what you can do about it! - by Submitted on Dec 10, 2010 from Lynette CraneStress makes you stupid. It sooner or later makes all of us stupid. I can prove it. So can you. Think back to the last time you rushed get to the post office before it closed to mail a package, only to discover when you got there that the package was back on your desk; or rushing to an ...
Views: 826 - Are you listening to your body? - by Submitted on Sep 28, 2012 from Lynette CraneThere’s an old story about a city slicker watching a farmer begin to train a mule. First, the farmer picked up a two-by-four and hit the mule over the head. Then he did it again … and again. The city slicker finally said, “I don’t get it. What are you trying to teach him?” The farmer replied, ...
Views: 815 - Why take a risk? - by Submitted on May 17, 2012 from Lynette CraneSome people take risks more readily than other people. And risks can be a little scary, whether they involve making a major career change and/or cross-country move, asking for a promotion or a raise, declaring your affection to someone else when you’re not sure how that person feels, or when it ...
Views: 814 - The Introvert’s Dilemma – Which door? - by Submitted on Oct 10, 2014 from Lynette CraneA friend and I had a conversation recently, in which she remarked that, when confronted with three side-by-side doors, she would always choose one of the side doors. And I thought about that, because we introverts often slide along the edges of life, skulking. I suspect many of us make ...
Views: 809 - Is relaxation time impossible for you to find? - by Submitted on Sep 07, 2012 from Lynette CraneDo you find yourself rushing all day, hoping to save some time at the end of the day in which to relax? Only to find that the time you “saved” by rushing wasn’t to be found later on? Perhaps your day is filled with “must do or else” activities that make it difficult for you to find time to slow ...
Views: 797 - Healthful Holiday Hints - by Submitted on Nov 21, 2012 from Lynette CraneThe holidays are a particular challenge for those of us who know we must be vigilant every day to maintain our health through good eating. But everyone needs to be careful not to put on weight that is going to be hard to lose later on, or worse yet, develop a health problem. Here are some of the ...
Views: 794 - Movement is good for you - by Submitted on May 10, 2012 from Lynette CraneIt’s now official: MOVEMENT IS GOOD FOR YOU. Oh, wait, you knew that already. And you’re doing it, right? Well, not right now, but as soon as you have time. Of course that time never seems to come. But what if regular sessions of movement actually helped create time in your life by ...
Views: 792 - The Work of Worry - by Submitted on Oct 10, 2012 from Lynette CraneDoes worrying ever do any good? Yes, if it means that you are planning ahead. That is the work of worry: to foresee a problem and take steps to avoid it. Whether it involves getting your car checked before a long road trip, turning off the water to the outside of your house before the big freeze ...
Views: 790 - Time Zones - by Submitted on Nov 08, 2011 from Lynette CraneThe wellness expert I was speaking to after her talk commented that she had almost been late for the conference. “I was stuck in traffic,” she lamented, “and I was really stressed.” I asked her what she was worried about, given that the audience was a group of very supportive women who ...
Views: 790 - Are you determined not to age? - by Submitted on Oct 31, 2012 from Lynette CraneWe live in a youth-oriented society, where the fastest growing group, the Baby Boomers, learned, “Never trust anyone over thirty.” They’ve probably extended that limit by now; I haven’t checked recently to see what it is. 60? 70? We see ads everywhere for products and services to erase ...
Views: 770 - Handling the stress of rejection - by Submitted on Feb 16, 2012 from Lynette CraneRejection can cause a particularly deep form of anger, because rejection seems to carry with it a heavy load: loss of self-esteem, and even of identity. Rejection can also result in depression. Sometimes it takes this shock of rejection to make you realize that you may have been asking for ...
Views: 769 - Stress and Your Health - by Submitted on Mar 28, 2012 from Lynette CraneIn my last article, I talked about “stress stupidity” and how it causes us to make mistakes and lose time. It actually does more than that: A recently released Yale University study, published online the week of January 9, 2012, in the journal Biological Psychiatry, shows that stress ...
Views: 755(1 vote) - Let a smile be your umbrella - by Submitted on Nov 15, 2011 from Lynette CraneNovember can bring gloomy days, rain, and even snow. Some people love this autumn weather; others are less enchanted by it. Add in a few ordinary life mishaps and you can create deep gloom. Here’s how to lift the gloom when you’re suffering from the “grumpies”, a discontented feeling that ...
Views: 749 - Hassles and the havoc they can create - by Submitted on Apr 19, 2012 from Lynette CraneIn the movies, we have often seen a character receive a shock, clutch his heart, and fall to the ground in a heart attack. No one thinks life’s daily hassles are dramatic, but in fact they can be just as deadly as a major shock. Real crises, such as having your house burn down, activate ...
Views: 743 - Is anybody listening? - by Submitted on Apr 04, 2012 from Lynette CraneOne common stressor is the feeling that we are trying to get others to understand our needs and our points of view, but somehow, no matter how hard we try, the message isn’t getting through. The solution to this stress? Try to understand the needs of your listener; then shape your ...
Views: 743 - Little habits can make big changes - by Submitted on Jan 17, 2013 from Lynette CraneAs 2013 approached, I felt, as many do, that I was being given a clean slate, a chance to order my life better – if only I could stick to that plan. It has long been my dream to not only run my own business, meditate, and exercise daily, but also to resume practicing singing several times a ...
Views: 730 - You Have Got To Be Committed! - by Submitted on Oct 25, 2013 from Lynette CraneSo many entrepreneurs are in for a rude awakening as they continue the search for the ‘EASY’ button. You know the ones I mean – they sign up for all the free teleclasses, free webinars, grab complimentary tickets to numerous events, subscribe to every possible newsletter out there – and still, ...
Views: 704 - The Best Gift of All - by Submitted on Dec 11, 2011 from Lynette CraneI was looking over the collection of greeting cards I have received over the years. All of them I treasure for one reason or another; one of them I truly cherish. It is from a friend who is very like me – in some ways. We both enjoy solitude, and can sit together companionably, reading, without ...
Views: 701 - Take charge of your stressful assumptions - by Submitted on Apr 12, 2012 from Lynette CraneIt has been said that the bulk of aggression in the world is the result of poor communication. Sometimes the wrong words are chosen; sometimes the wrong words are heard. In addition to someone producing a communication and another person hearing that communication, there is another layer: ...
Views: 695 - How A Little Stress Leads to More Stress …and what to do about it - by Submitted on Dec 15, 2010 from Lynette CraneA little stress goes a long way, because it leads to more stress, until you don’t know how to stop the whole process. But there is some good news. An estimated 10% of stress is due to what happens to us such as job loss, accidents, major damage to our home, to ourselves or to a loved ...
Views: 682 - Women’s Warning Signs of a Heart Attack - by Submitted on Feb 28, 2012 from Lynette CraneThe “Hollywood Heart Attack,” where the character, clutching his chest, slumps to the floor immediately, does sometimes happen. But many heart attacks do not mimic this model. In particular, women’s symptoms of heart attack may be very different from men’s in both quality and severity. It ...
Views: 662 - No Fault De-Stressing - by Submitted on Oct 28, 2011 from Lynette Crane85% of major illness is now attributed to stress. The figure is alarming because it implies that the responsibility for our well-being lies directly in our own hands, as in a way it does. People who already have a major illness feel dismayed, and even angry, about the new emphasis on ...
Views: 638 - What’s in your Holiday Bucket? - by Submitted on Oct 25, 2011 from Lynette CraneIcons of black cats with arched backs are appearing everywhere, to be followed soon by turkeys in all stages, from on-the-hoof to lying down, legs in air wearing a golden brown crust. Can wreaths, holly and jolly fat men in red suits surrounded by elves be far behind? Your memory bucket is ...
Views: 635 - How Guilt Undermines Your January Resolutions - by Submitted on Jan 18, 2011 from Lynette CraneA professor of mine used to remark, ”The perfectly scientific life is impossible to lead.” You will sometimes fail to follow guidelines for good health. You will feel too tired to exercise, and you may be right. You can be so tired that you are more likely to have an accident or injure ...
Views: 588 - Holiday Hints at the Buffet for the Heart-wise - by Submitted on Nov 23, 2011 from Lynette CraneThe holidays are a particular challenge for those of us who know we must be vigilant every day to maintain our health through good eating. (Actually, that’s pretty much everybody.) Here are some of the challenges, and how to meet them. The holiday party, with its buffet of delectable treats, ...
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