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Articles from David Harm | Selfgrowth.com
- Surviving (And Thriving) From Throat Cancer - by Submitted on Oct 28, 2018 from David HarmRecently I learned a former co-worker I knew in Nebraska was diagnosed with throat cancer. I wouldn’t wish any cancer on my worst enemy, but having gone through throat cancer I know first hand how difficult the treatment can be. My ex-wife hand breast cancer and I watched her go through ...
Views: 1056 - So Much Evil News - by Submitted on Oct 28, 2018 from David HarmBeen kind of sad lately. Maybe even a bit depressed. I can’t see how anyone can not feel a bit down after reading or watching the latest news. What story am I talking about? On what day? It doesn’t matter, the stories don’t really seem to change, just the places and the names change. I ...
Views: 1028 - Recognizing those silver linings - by Submitted on Sep 24, 2018 from David HarmI recently found out that I had been approved for a new visa to live and work in the United Kingdom. This new visa, just like the last one is good for two and a half years. When I look back at my time living in the UK, it has been a lifetime. I don’t mean that to sound negatively but rather ...
Views: 951 - Passive Aggressive Behaviour. - by Submitted on Aug 25, 2018 from David HarmI am becoming more and more aware that in my past I was a master at passive aggressive behaviour. I played head games with people to try and make them do things that I wanted them to do. The reason for this awareness is because for well over the last year it has been being done to me. ...
Views: 1015 - Working with a bully - by Submitted on Jul 27, 2018 from David HarmI have mentioned it before and wrote about it in my first book Damaged Merchandise. I shake. Not all the time, in fact if I’m sitting next to you, you’d never know it. I shake when I’m writing or have some kind of movement. It is something that I have lived with for over 40 years. It is ...
Views: 978 - Memories filled with regrets - by Submitted on Jun 04, 2018 from David HarmAs I have grown in years, I am ashamed of some of the things I have done. So ashamed that to mention them right now would take more than a simple story to explain. I’m not even sure if I could explain it all in a book. In fact, I’m not sure if I would even believe the explanation. What I ...
Views: 1315 - I Was My Parent's Son - by Submitted on Feb 15, 2018 from David HarmAs the years begin to pass me by, it is hard not to reflect on my life. Lost friendships, lost loves… just so much lost. Don’t get me wrong, I am very happy with how my life has turned out, yet I can’t help and look back at the destruction of my life. From early childhood, watching my ...
Views: 1818 - To be "here" is better than being "there" - by Submitted on Jan 19, 2018 from David HarmRecovery author and guru, John Bradshaw once talked about being a "human being" instead of a "human doing." While New Age thoughts talk about the illusions of being a human. Never happy we're we are in life. Always having to get "there" and when it finally becomes our "here" we realize that ...
Views: 1260 - Letting go of the Narcissist - by Submitted on Dec 23, 2017 from David HarmSomething has been bothering me for the last couple of years and I couldn’t quite put my finger on it until just recently. A series of events gave me that “ah-ha” moment. Amazingly, it started with Donald Trump. Sorry, I can’t say thank you to him for that because what started the awakening ...
Views: 1522 - Dysfunctional Families Never Totally Go Away - by Submitted on Nov 09, 2017 from David HarmIt is coming up on a year since I was diagnosed with cancer. An amazing year it has been. A year of strength, as well as a year of fear. It has been filled with a sense of accomplishment as well as disappointment. I have experienced the whole emotional gauntlet for the last 12 months. It ...
Views: 1312 - Will not be a victim - by Submitted on Sep 23, 2017 from David Harm3 September of 2015 I got married to a wonderful lady. I admit, I have been married before, so this shouldn’t be any different. Yet, this was different. My now wife and I had been dating for five years. Our dating consisted of being together roughly two months over the course of the ...
Views: 1309 - Reclaiming That Little Lost Boy - by Submitted on May 14, 2017 from David HarmMy favourite recovery author is John Bradshaw. He is the one who introduced me to the idea of the inner child. And he also helped me understand that alcoholism is never a primary illness, but rather it is a secondary disease. Bradshaw believes that the primary illness is co-dependency or as he ...
Views: 1580 - I Don't Have To Write This - by Submitted on Feb 20, 2017 from David Harm“I just have to get this article done tonight.” The world might come to an end if I don’t. No one ever told me I had to get it done. The sad part is I may not get it done on time because I had to go to town to get new shoelaces. Do you get my sarcasm and the utter distaste for words like ...
Views: 1283 - How strong are you? - by Submitted on Jan 27, 2017 from David HarmStrength comes in many forms. It can come by having pure physical strength. A 180 pound man, lifting 225 pounds above his head would be considered strong. A different type of strength would be a person with stamina. Another 180 pound man, can lift five pounds over his head, yet he can run a ...
Views: 1269 - The Do's and Dont's of Cancer - by Submitted on Jan 15, 2017 from David HarmCancer. A word that no one wants to hear or say. A word which even in this modern time conjures up thoughts of death. The surgeries, the chemo, the radiation, at times, you wonder will it ever stop. And at times, you wonder, how much fight the both of you have. But, somehow, by the Grace of ...
Views: 1706 - Realizing we're never alone - by Submitted on Sep 20, 2016 from David HarmEverything that has happened to me in September symbolises life and death. A part of me died, so a new part could come to life. The closest this symbol came to reality was on the 15th in 2014. That day, I laid on a hospital bed and was under the knife for over four hours. After the ...
Views: 1874 - Only A Step Dad - by Submitted on Dec 02, 2015 from David HarmSomething has bothered me for a long time. The use and understanding of the phrase “Real Dad.” A real dad, to me, is someone who raises you, who guides you, and sets an example for a healthy way to live with some morals attached. So many people come from blended families and two of my three ...
Views: 1477 - Being Exposed - by Submitted on Nov 01, 2015 from David HarmWe come into this world exposed. Our whole selves open for display. Our minds to fragile, with no experience to be ashamed or be shy with our exposure. As we age, we begin to build little walls around us, not letting everyone see the "real" person. We begin to gain friends and our parents send ...
Views: 1277 - Power that breeds insecurity... the workaholic - by Submitted on Nov 01, 2015 from David HarmIn my opinion, there are some addictions that are harder to deal with then others. Don't get me wrong, every addiction is extremely difficult to stop. But some addictions can be praised by society as a whole. One that comes readily to mind is a workaholic. Management praises a great worker. ...
Views: 1559 - Seeing the world with blinders - by Submitted on Nov 01, 2015 from David Harm"Hi, I'm Dave and I'm an alcoholic." I've made this statement numerous times over the last 21 plus years. I've said it at AA meetings and have changed the ending to fit in at CODA, Alanon, NA, and ACOA meetings, I've made this comment on different websites across the web. I've also talked about ...
Views: 1451 - Wanting to find success - by Submitted on Oct 31, 2015 from David HarmI think as long as I live, I will try to be a "success." I have a good idea of what the term means to me, but, the family I grew up in, pictures success as cash in the bank, money in stocks, a fancy home (or two), driving new vechiles, the list can go on forever. You get the picture. But as you ...
Views: 1348 - Recovery From Divorce - by Submitted on Oct 31, 2015 from David HarmAt the time, I couldn't believe it would happen to me. We raised a family, we fought, then made-up, and made plans for our future - together. We didn't always have good times, but I honestly believed we would work through all our problems. We didn't have much money, nor did we go on exotic ...
Views: 1607 - Paying It Forward - by Submitted on Aug 15, 2015 from David HarmSometimes the best thing we can do for others, is nothing. Offer our experience and let them grow on their own... During my first attempt at sobriety I started writing. Mostly journals about what had happened in my life and how it affected me at that time. I found it quite therapeutic. My ...
Views: 1428 - Hobbies... helping us along the spiritual path - by Submitted on Jul 03, 2015 from David HarmAs a teenager and young adult my main hobby, let me change that, my only hobby was partying. I was functional in school as far as grades go but everything revolved around partying. It didn't matter if it was alcohol or drugs, I wanted to party and whatever means it took to get there I would do ...
Views: 2913 - PTSD... closing in on one year - by Submitted on Jun 06, 2015 from David HarmAs more time passes from my operations I begin to see more of it. Some have mentioned that it is a form of PTSD. It is hard to describe. The best word I can think of is fear. I wasn't fearful at the time but as I look back at it all it makes me extremely fearful. For the month leading up ...
Views: 1409 - Enjoying God's Gifts - by Submitted on Apr 30, 2015 from David HarmWith the weather changing and the days getting longer, it is easier to get outside and get some fresh air. Shortly after my heart surgery the weather turned cold and it was hard to get out. I remember one morning going to get some groceries and I forgot to wear a hat. My head got cold and I ...
Views: 1598 - The Life and Death of a Drunk - by Submitted on May 17, 2009 from David HarmMy favorite recovery author is John Bradshaw. He is the one who introduced me to the idea of the inner child. And he also helped me understand that alcoholism is never a primary illness, but rather it is a secondary disease. Bradshaw believes that the primary illness is co-dependency or as he ...
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