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Articles from Bobbi Palmer | Selfgrowth.com
- Are You Dating Like a Grownup? - by Submitted on May 17, 2012 from Bobbi PalmerI’m often asked what I mean by Dating Like a Grownup. It’s obviously a great question that I probably should answer every so often. (I am, after all, the CEO of Date Like a Grownup!) I’m going to give you my definition, and then I’m going to tell you about a great book I’ve read that does a ...
Views: 1655(3 votes) - Are You Ready to Teach and Tame Her? (FemiTypes - The Epilogue) - by Submitted on Sep 03, 2012 from Bobbi PalmerOver the past few months I’ve profiled six types of women – I call them FemiTypes – who have less than healthy relationships with men. I’ve written about The Princess, The 18 Year Old, The Scaredy Cat, The Wow-Me Woman, The Bitter Woman and The Sexpot. Why have I written about women when you ...
Views: 1925(1 vote) - Are You Still 18 When It Comes to Dating and Relationships? - by Submitted on Jul 13, 2012 from Bobbi PalmerDating like a grownup is the quickest path to finally enjoying mutually nurturing relationships with men who are full of respect, adoration and commitment. If you're going to date like a grownup, developing empathy for men is crucial. Just like all your relationships, when you have the ...
Views: 2404(5 votes) - Are You Waiting to Be Wowed? - by Submitted on Jul 31, 2012 from Bobbi PalmerNewsflash: Women constantly push really good guys right out of their lives without even knowing it. We do it by behaving in ways that, until pointed out by someone else, are a complete mystery. Finally having this pointed out to me in my early 40s was a huge part of my transition from a ...
Views: 2727(5 votes) - Avoid Dating Burnout by Thinking More Like a Man - by Submitted on Jun 10, 2012 from Bobbi PalmerThis week I spoke with my client, “Sue,” who recently entered the online dating world. Right off the bat she had scoped out a profile she really liked and emailed him. He seemed interested, attentive and pretty fabulous on paper. The next thing you know…she has a date! When they met in real ...
Views: 3207(5 votes) - Do All Men Make You Mad? The Bitter Woman - by Submitted on Aug 20, 2012 from Bobbi PalmerDo All Men Make You Mad? (FemiType #5: The Bitter Woman) In an effort to help you understand the man side of this midlife dating experience, I’ve introduced you to The Princess, The 18 Year Old, The Scaredy Cat and The Wow-Me Woman: all FemiTypes* that send good men running. Today I’m going ...
Views: 2468(3 votes) - New Ideas for Things to Do This Weekend - by Submitted on Jun 14, 2012 from Bobbi PalmerWhen I was single I had a love/hate relationship with weekends. I loved having the extra time off work; I hated that I didn’t have a man to spend the time with. The truth is, though, that I didn’t need a man to have fun or accomplish something meaningful. In many cases, I just needed ME! I ...
Views: 2129(4 votes) - Online Rejection: There’s No Such Thing! - by Submitted on Apr 30, 2012 from Bobbi PalmerThis is one skill I want you to master: Rejecting online rejection. Learning to accept rejection gracefully, with as few “dings” to your self-esteem as possible, is key to finding your true love. As a dating coach, I’ve found the #1 reason you won’t have success online is giving up too soon. ...
Views: 1708(3 votes) - Two Simple Thoughts That Will Change the Way You Date - by Submitted on Jun 01, 2012 from Bobbi PalmerMy guess is that you’ve been dating a while and not getting great results. You’re here reading this, after all. The best way to shift into having dates that render positive outcomes – like having more fun and eventually meeting The One – is to change the way you talk to yourself before you even ...
Views: 1558(4 votes) - Your Fear of Rejection Is Getting You Rejected (FemiType #3: The Scaredy Cat) - by Submitted on Jul 22, 2012 from Bobbi PalmerWe all know that dating over 40 can be a bit of a jungle with challenges, surprises and pitfalls. I'm sure you've encountered your share of Pingers, Needy-men and Players as you meet single men. I get it, and you belong to a large, loving sisterhood. But it's not only us gals who have dating ...
Views: 3049(4 votes) - ***How You Can Help Men Make You Happy - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerIf you don’t ask…you don’t get. I think this is the key to being happy with men. It’s one of my Dad’s favorite lines. I heard it so often growing up that it’s now a mantra in my already overloaded brain. Dad’s premise was that it is your responsibility to state what you want, and then give ...
Views: 1754(11 votes) - ***The Truth About Reading Men’s Minds – And Quieting Yours - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerIf you’re a woman who tends to over think and over analyze (and let’s face it…what woman doesn’t?) I want to advise you when it’s appropriate to do so about men: N-E-V-E-R! Oh how we love to dwell in conversations with ourselves about all kinds of fascinating things. Is he attracted to me, ...
Views: 2746(10 votes) - What Dating Is Like for Men (Oh…ya think you know?) - by Submitted on Jul 10, 2012 from Bobbi PalmerLast week was Men’s Health week; and as another nod to the guys, I thought I'd help them by helping you better understand them. (Did you follow that?) In particular, I want to help you better understand the experience men have when they're trying to “date like a grownup.” If you've read my ...
Views: 2805(4 votes) - ***Key #4 to Finding Hope and Finding Him: Time to Get Out and Trail Blaze - by Submitted on Nov 04, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerThis is the third in a series of articles sharing my 5 Keys to Finding Hope and Finding Him. The 5 Keys are: M - Me and Me first. A - Assess your list. S - Shed your stuff. T - Time to get out and Trail blaze. R - Real women find their man. I say you need to Trail Blaze because, as you ...
Views: 1437(3 votes) - ***The Secret to Being a Happy Dater - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerWhy is it that when we date — even at 40, 50, or 60 — we can become an alien woman from planet WTF? If you’re anything like I was, it’s sometimes difficult to recognize yourself when you’re in the presence of a hot, nice, or simply available man. The beliefs and habits of our 25 or 30 year ...
Views: 2147(3 votes) - Can I Find Love When I Have Serious Life Problems? - by Submitted on May 24, 2012 from Bobbi PalmerI received an email yesterday that I want to share. I hear some form of this a lot: “I’m [not perfect because of fill-in-the-blank] and I’m worried no man will ever want me!” I get it but I can’t tell you how much this breaks my heart. I lived in the “no man wants a fat girl” reality for a ...
Views: 1711(3 votes) - Nine Ways to Make Your Date Great (in the First Ten Minutes!) - by Submitted on May 20, 2012 from Bobbi PalmerThe first 10 minutes of a date often determine whether a second date is even going to happen. And let's face it: second dates are not the norm for many. That was definitely my story until I learned about (what I now call) "Date Waste." Date waste is when a date is a drag but has little to do ...
Views: 1507(3 votes) - ***3 Ways to Manage Rejection So You Can Move On - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerRejection sucks. There’s no other way to say it. When he doesn’t show interest, doesn’t show up, or breaks it off after a relationship develops; it’s ugly and icky. No doubt about it. Thing is: rejection doesn’t have to strike a mortal blow. I know so many women who avoid connecting with ...
Views: 4974(5 votes) - Will He Like You Naked? - by Submitted on Mar 03, 2012 from Bobbi PalmerAre you excited about the notion of hopping into bed with your new guy? Slowly undressing…eyes locked…savoring each other’s bodies…lust so intense that you both might explode… …or does the thought of it make you so nervous you want to puke? Let’s face it: if you’re working on attracting ...
Views: 2100(4 votes) - ***Dating Tip: First Decide Whether You Like Him - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerIt’s pathetic how easily I can find my self acting like the insecure kid I was in high school. These days it doesn’t come up too much, but can happen when I meet someone I especially like and admire, and get the sense they don’t return the feeling. I can get to feeling so hurt and undeserving ...
Views: 2112(8 votes) - ***Are You What's Holding You Back from Finding Love? - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerWhy do we hold on to the man who isn’t good for us, our feelings of insecurity and being less-than, or our pattern of picking jerks and liars? These are all self-sabotaging behaviors and beliefs, and intellectually we know it. Yet we cling on for dear life, feeling powerless over our unfortunate ...
Views: 2295(12 votes) - One Surprising Way Men Help Us While Hurting Us - by Submitted on Jun 24, 2013 from Bobbi PalmerIt’s your fear of rejection that is getting you rejected. ~~ Bobbi Palmer I know…I write about rejection a lot: how to recognize when it is and isn't real; how there’s no such thing as rejection when you’re meeting guys using online dating; and how to learn from it, recover and move on to the ...
Views: 1236(3 votes) - ***One Thing You Can Stop Doing to Improve Your Dates and Relationships - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerRaise your hand if you can accurately read the minds of your girlfriends. My guess is that, at least for a few, you actually can. Larry and I can read each other’s minds at times. When you’ve spent about 2000 days with someone you love, that happens. (It’s not always a good thing, btw.) Now, ...
Views: 1793(4 votes) - ***Why You're Dating and Not Finding Quality Men - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerDating can be a real pain in the butt, right? It can be a lot of work that leads to a lot of nothing. I conducted a survey recently and asked women what their biggest challenge was when they date. The #1 response was: I’m not meeting quality men. Can you relate?? I hear this from women ...
Views: 2837(5 votes) - ***The 10 Style Secrets of Hip, Healthy & Sexy Women Over 40 - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerDo you walk out of the house each day feeling good about yourself, and ready to run into that one man who is going to rock your world an put that proverbial cherry on your cake? Check out this guest post by Sybil Henry, The Style Concierge. Sybil joined me Wednesday night for my GGNO Club ...
Views: 3044(6 votes) - [Video] Dating New Men: How to Tell Him the Scary Stuff - by Submitted on Jun 21, 2013 from Bobbi PalmerTo Watch Video Click Here Ungrateful children. Mortgage that’s killin’ you. Surgical scars. Chronic health problems…these are all realities of life after 40. Let’s face it: we’ve been around a while. We have “stuff!” When you’re dating ...
Views: 1123(1 vote) - ***Given a Chance, How Men Can Surprise You! - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerAre you resisting letting men help you or do nice things for you? Maybe you’re thinking it threatens your independence or makes you seem weak. Or maybe you’re just trying to be low-maintenance; thinking that this is what men want. As I’ve said time and time again, letting a man do for you – ...
Views: 1681(4 votes) - ***Make Your List, But Consider It Twice (Or Thrice!) - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerCan you use a dating pick-me-up? Something to boost your hope of finding your fabulous life partner? If you’re wondering if dating and the nonsense that sometimes comes with it is worth it, read on. I have a spectacular success story to share, along with advice on two simple things that will ...
Views: 1127(1 vote) - ***When Do Men Expect to Have Sex With Us? A Single Man's Response - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerI get asked this question constantly. Women who are dating want to know this; especially women who are divorced and over 40, and haven’t been dating for some time. They also want to know how they can tell if sex is all he wants. Good questions. The truth is that whether you’re dating at 20, ...
Views: 3574(6 votes) - ***Why It Can Be a Good Thing When He Goes Cave-bound - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerLast week a smart, thoughtful woman left a comment on my post about Dating the Somewhat Disappearing Man. These are the guys I call “pingers” because they ping you (or contact you) just often enough to make sure you’re there when they need or want you. They keep you attached and interested, and ...
Views: 4117(4 votes) - Are You Attracting Cads and Pingers? - by Submitted on Aug 26, 2012 from Bobbi PalmerLet me start today by telling you how magnificent you are. The fact that you are a woman over 40 and reading this tells me that you are all the more spectacular. Really, it does! One of the reasons finding love over 40 can be the most gratifying time of all is that you know your sphere of ...
Views: 2334(1 vote) - How to Answer Those Personal Questions You Don’t Want to Answer [Video] - by Submitted on Jun 21, 2013 from Bobbi PalmerTo Watch Video Click Here Were you at last Friday’s Grownup Girls’ Night Out Live Man Panel? I had three men — ages 40s, 50s and 70s – generously share their thoughts and feelings about what attracts them to women, what to do on dates, how to tell if a man is into ...
Views: 1187(1 vote) - How to Magnetize the Men You Like: Top Tips [Video] - by Submitted on Jun 21, 2013 from Bobbi PalmerTo Watch Video Click Here Since you all can’t all attend my upcoming Live Event “The Art of Magnetizing Men“, I wanted to share my #1 Top Tip for being a midlife man magnet. Then I figured: why not invite my two guest experts to share theirs! Let me know your ...
Views: 1219(1 vote) - How to Say “No” (Whether You Like Him or Not) [Video] - by Submitted on Jun 21, 2013 from Bobbi PalmerTo Watch Video Click Here What do you do when a man asks you out and you aren’t interested? Are you worried about hurting his feelings? I get this question quite frequently because, after all, we want to please men, right? Here are my simple tips for how to say “no” to a ...
Views: 1206(1 vote) - How to Shake Up Your Love Life This Weekend [Video] - by Submitted on Jun 21, 2013 from Bobbi PalmerTo Watch Video Click Here Do you feel like you’re in a bit of a rut? Sometimes, especially when we’re older and haven’t dated for a while, we can start feeling bored, boring or invisible when it comes to men. I recorded this video to help you shake things up! With very ...
Views: 1235(1 vote) - How to Tell if He Is Second-Date Worthy - by Submitted on Jan 07, 2013 from Bobbi PalmerI read this quote recently: I love that feeling of being in love, the effect of having butterflies when you wake up in the morning. That is special. ~ Jennifer Aniston I love her, and no offense meant, but how has that butterfly-thing been working for Jen so far? During my 35-plus years ...
Views: 2036(1 vote) - [Video] How Do I Get Myself to Think Nice Guys Are Hot? - by Submitted on Jun 21, 2013 from Bobbi PalmerTo Watch Video Click Here Last weekend was my live event in Los Angeles: Mastering the Art of Magnetizing Men. During this two-day event I gave women tons of advice and step-by-step tips to help them attract quality men so they could finally meet their loving lifetime partner. If ...
Views: 1125(1 vote) - [Video] What To Do When It Doesn’t Work Out - by Submitted on Jun 21, 2013 from Bobbi PalmerTo Watch Video Click Here I had a disappointment today. I blew an opportunity to do well at something that was super important to me. I was struggling to find a way to fix it…to make it right. So I thought: What would I tell another sister to do in this situation? I came up with the ...
Views: 1267(1 vote) - ***5 Tips to Help You Stick to Dating, Even When It Sucks - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerYesterday I wanted to quit. This is too hard. There are days things seem to be clicking and I’m finally getting it…marching boldly toward my goal. Then there are days like yesterday when I feel clueless…like a failure with no hope of success. And I can’t help but take it personally. I know I ...
Views: 2058(5 votes) - ***Online Dating: How to Get Started and Make it Work - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerAs if dating and mating wasn’t hard enough, technology has added a variety of new challenges to the art of hooking up. Not only do you have to master the computer crud, you have to figure out how to actually connect with another human being amidst the volume and the anonymity. Being a ...
Views: 2435(4 votes) - ***What Are Your Dating and Relationship Rules - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerHave you ever asked yourself this question: What are my rules for dating and relationships? What are my boundaries, what must I do, and what must I have? And what will I simply not tolerate in myself or in others? Too often I talk to women who stayed in unfulfilling relationships or have a ...
Views: 1457(4 votes) - ***Should I Waste My Time Meeting or Dating an “Imperfect” Guy? - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi Palmer30 minutes. That’s about how long you generally have to “get to know” a man before deciding to have a cup of coffee or date with him. You meet online, or at the local bank, and that’s about it. But he seems imperfect. He’s clearly missing one of your must-haves. Should you gracefully decline? ...
Views: 2333(4 votes) - ***8 Ways to Prevent Turning to Mush around Single Men - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerI've heard the same thing from so many women this week that I had to ask you if this sounds familiar: "I'm generally a very friendly, confident gal...unless I'm in the company of a single man—especially one I'm attracted to. In that case I turn into mush." Why is it that when we meet or ...
Views: 2373 - ***Dating Over 40: Why He's Not Asking You Out (Part 2) - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerContinuing from yesterday, it's important to make yourself memorable when you are dating. There are tons of women out there; you want to be the one he wants to know. When you follow this advice and get your story out in the right way, the guys who are good matches will take notice. They are ...
Views: 2496 - ***Dating Over 40: Why He’s Not Asking You Out (Part 1) - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerI can answer this in three words: You’re not memorable. That’s it. Whether it’s the hot man you had a nice chat with at the local coffee shop or the guy you had a great first date with, getting him to ask you out can take some skill. Yep, I said skill. You’re not 18 anymore, and the ...
Views: 2346 - ***Dating? (Exactly) What to Say to Men in Difficult Situations - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerIn dating, good communication is the key to meeting and attracting men…especially the right men. It's also the key to developing and maintaining fulfilling relationships. One of the most important ways I support my coaching clients (www.datelikeagrownup.com/coaching) is by helping them ...
Views: 2224 - ***How to Turn Fear of Dating into Fun Dates - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerWhen you think of dating – especially online dating – do you feel any fear? Do you get even a tiny twinge of terror? If your answer is "yes," you are not alone. In fact, I think you're among the majority. The women I'm coaching often tell me about situations they describe as "scary." Here ...
Views: 1938 - ***Ten Tips to Kick-Start Positive Change - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2011 from Bobbi PalmerAll right, ladies. I trust we all got through Valentine’s Day, right? But let's make this your last February fourteenth when you don’t have a fab date! To do that, you’re going to have to make some changes. Put simply, stagnation is never good. When you refuse to change or embrace new ...
Views: 1686 - Is "Should-ing" on Yourself Blocking Your View of a Beautiful Future? - by Submitted on Sep 09, 2012 from Bobbi Palmer"If it were a snake, it would 'a bit ya!" That's what Ethel Mertz always said to her husband Fred (Lucy Ricardo's neighbors in I Love Lucy) when he'd wander around looking for his glasses – which were always on top of his (bald) head. Do you remember that? Well, this is what I could have said ...
Views: 2871 - What Is Your Online Dating IQ? - by Submitted on Feb 07, 2013 from Bobbi PalmerI know I sound like a broken record about the benefits of dating online, especially if you are single and over 40. I’m going to continue to nag you about this because I want what you want: for you to find the man of your dreams, and to never let each other go. Getting online is the best way to ...
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