Can I be Happier? Take Control of Your Life

Can you change? Is it possible for humans to adapt, change and improve our behaviour, responses, and actions?

The short answer is yes. The full answer is yes if you know how.

Every type of advanced technology and equipment comes with a user manual. Human beings do not have that privilege, and most people struggle to understand self. We often hear statements, like “I feel so lost”, “I don’t know who I am”, “I cannot believe I did that”.

These statements have become, acceptable as the norm in our current age. We do not even raise an eyebrow when we hear it anymore. Not being happy and satisfied in life has strangely become acceptable.

Stress, anxiety, and depression is accepted as normal.

The truth is far greater than that. The truth is that we are in control of our own minds and our own emotional states. We are the captains of our own ships. We control how we feel, what state we are in and how we experience life. It is easy to blame the past or external influences and often we hide behind these excuses, because it seems easier. It is only easy in the short term, but it becomes a heavy weight in the longer term.

There are many ways to take back control of who you are, and I spend most of my time teaching students these techniques. But here I will share one with you, that could alter the way you experience life. You can also be part of the NLP Courses offered by Action Factory.

Whenever I am faced with a situation where I feel negative about what is happening or about what has happened,I start to listen, and observe my own internal dialogue. We all talk to ourselves. It is these internal conversations with self that have a tremendous impact on our lives.

Think of your internal conversations as the programmer of your experience. And ask yourself, “how do I want to feel?” “What action or behaviour is required to make me feel better or improved?”

The moment we know what we want, we open opportunity to start gaining and experiencing it.

Did you notice I did not focus on the negative thoughts? I only use them to find the opposite and positive I want in its place. I then start acting and behaving according to the positive need. Even if I am partially faking my behaviour in the short term.

This allows me to “re-program” my internal dialogue and allows internal shifts and change to happen.

You see, there are only one of two strategies I can use in my life.

Pain or pleasure.

The more we focus on pain, the more we will experience. The more we focus on pleasure and joy, the more we will experience. Both are always in existence. No one lives a life of purity or constant joy. Pain and pleasure are experienced by every one of us.

It is not that both exists that is important, it is which one do you have more of that is relevant. The choice is yours.

The moment we start focusing on the correct direction our “experience” changes. Which part of your life do you feed the most is the part that will grow the most? Do you feed the pain or do you feed the pleasure?

I often look at negatives in my life as a gift. It allows me to better appreciate the good. Pain in my world allows me to fully enjoy pleasure. As strange as that sounds, there is a deep truth in it. We can only truly experience love if we have had our hearts broken before. We appreciate a good, warm meal, when we have been hungry before. We enjoy a good sleep as a result of being exhausted.

Not fighting the negatives, but reframing the internal effect is what starves them and feeds the positives in our lives.

Knowing and intellectually understanding this concept is not good enough. We need to actively apply it daily in our lives. In a certain sense we need to become, positive mindset fit. Repetition creates habits. The ideal situation is when the “reframing” happens on auto pilot.

You are more in control of how you experience life than you often accept. To come to the realisation and acceptance that you are truly your own director can totally alter your life.

Should you want to know more about taking control of your life, you are welcome to join me on one of my many free talks on this subject. You can find more information at www.actionfactory.co.za

I enjoy sharing my experiences and knowledge with people that are hungry for a better life.