The Worst Panic Attack Yet! Part 2

I was going to have to wake my husband because the tightness and chills were getting worse.

My plan was to take a couple of over the counter pain medications, make a cup of tea on the propane stove and then for sure this feeling would be gone . Was I wrong on that one!

Somewhere inside of me I heard that inner voice you hear sometimes and perhaps ignore for whatever reason. It was telling me that" panic was setting in and was not I going to do something about the way I was feeling"?

It was like I was on remote control or shock because everything appeared to be moving in slow motion.

I remember standing beside the bed in the cabin and calling to my husband to wake up. My voice sounded small and childlike.

He jumped up immediately so I must have been yelling not speaking quietly as I thought.

I now know that I was going into shock and The Worst Panic Attack Yet! had begun.

Panic Attacks can take many forms but this was all a new form for me. I thought I had been through some of the worst sweats, heart palpitations, dizziness,mind confusion ever .

NOT SO!!

G.(my husband) was throwing on his clothes, grabbing the truck keys and moving me outside all in one motion.

I was crying and saying "I don't think I'm going to make it".

We were over an hour away from the nearest hospital!!!! That thought only added to the panic and I was thinking of my children and of all the things I was not going to get to do and another hundred or more thoughts all one after the other.

We were in the old truck,on the highway when I heard myself say,"Stop in this little village . They might have an ambulance station here". I have no idea why I said that. It was as if someone else was talking and thinking for me. It even felt like a higher power was controlling our efforts to get me to a hospital quicker than that old truck could.

We stopped at a garage station and asked if they would call 911. At that very moment an ambulance appeared on its way back from another call and noticed all the commotion at the garage.

Now I am crying and writhing around on the truck seat with the door open. The panic, pain and fear is really taken hold of me and I actually lost control of my bladder.

How can I feel embarrassed about that when I should be thinking about living.

Can anyone reading this article see what panic can do?

I was being carried into the ambulance and hooked up to monitors when I realized my husband was not coming with me.

The doors to the ambulance banged shut and we were off . I remember that no sirens were on at first .

However just as I was thinking about the siren,the monitor I had on my arm started to beep and the attendant called out some numbers to the driver and the ambulance took off even faster with the sirens blaring.

I asked the man if he could see my husbands truck following us and he said no he did not see it.

I don't think I ever felt so sad, alone and scared. I thought of my children and if I would see them again.

The panic was messing up my thoughts and for a moment I went blank .

With all this happening so quickly I started to think of The Worst Panic Attack Yet! and suddenly was reminded by the fullness of my bladder that I needed a bedpan!!!

Yes …..thats right . Of all the things I had in my mind this is what was coming to be most important. Humorous as this sounds, I felt the panic starting to release.

Even at a time like this there was still a way to get panic to leave. I know it is hard to believe but as I said,"This is my story and personal experience".

There is always hope and you find help for your problems at the strangest times if you can remain open to the possibilities inside your powerful mind.

Till my next article, keep my story in mind if it helps to get a way past The Worst Panic Attack Yet!