The Reason Change is so Difficult.
At times it can seem that just about everybody is trying to change something about themselves. Many of these people are sincere in their efforts, but sadly, most will fail to achieve lasting change in their lives. They will then have to blame themselves for that failure, when the real problem is how they have been trained to use their minds.
As small children we are shown marks on the blackboard and told “this word means such and such” The next time we see that word we will know what it means and be able to respond appropriately. We aren’t aware of it at the time, but we are being taught to “think” in a way that will make change very difficult later on.
What we asking the young child to do is form a mental image or perception of the symbol on the blackboard and then attach a meaning to it. The next time the mind receives the same sensory input it will form the same perception and the child will know which meaning to attach to it.
The attachment or assignment of meaning is followed by an emotional response. For many this is their experience of reality. A perception is formed from sensory input, a meaning is assigned from memory and an emotional response is generated. Now we come to the problem.
While ever the mind receives sensory input it will form a perception. I think we can regard this process as inescapable. If the sensory receptors in the form of eyes ,ears etc. are working the mind must form a mental picture of what is “out there”
The assignment of meaning to our perceptions becomes so automatic that we are no longer aware that we are doing it. We have become so unmindful of this cognitive process that we now regard the meaning that we assign as being contained in the perception itself. We now consider the perception and meaning to be one. And this has very unfortunate consequences for us.
It now seems that whenever the mind forms the perception we are saddled with the emotional response that accompanies it whether we want it or not. Just getting the mind to form the perception is enough to subject us to a set feelings that we may or may not wish to experience.
This is, of course, the reason why outside events seem to have the power to dominate us. The external environment can force the mind to form a perception of it. from sensory input. But the emotional response is caused by the assignment of meaning. And because this assignment of meaning is now totally automatic, it can seem that the external events had the power to force our response as well. “They/It made me “ is an opening line that most of us know only too well.
What this means in everyday terms is that every time we decide to change something about our behaviour we are undermined by this cognitive process. We try to avoid some undesirable activity such as overeating, only to be presented with “marks on the blackboard” that we assign meanings to and generate an emotional response that urges us to engage in our familiar behaviour. All we are doing is acting in a different way while all the time feeling like doing what we are used to doing.
What we must do to achieve lasting alteration to our behaviour is retrain the mind from automatically assigning meaning to every perception it forms. We can become selective about which thoughts we “make real” and thereby generate an emotional response. This allows us to become emotionally neutral in areas where we previously felt compelled. Unless we do learn to separate the meaning from the perception, all we are doing is setting up a futile struggle against our habitual responses. Experience tells us what the usual outcome is going to be.
Rob. Jager is the founder and director of The HungerMaster Weight Management Program. He can be contacted at www.hungermaster.com or rob@hungermaster.com
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