I ask you now to look at the current state of your love life, your romantic love life, and your views and feelings about the relationship you are currently in or—if you currently do not have an intimate romantic partner—how you view relationships in general.Knowing your preferences regarding your romantic love life also means that if your romantic love life does not match your preferences and if it cannot be worked out to match your truth, then you will survive and be perfectly fine as you graciously exit the relationship.

Perhaps you are not ready to settle down with one person. Does this mean that you need to deprive yourself of experiencing joy and closeness, being a true friend, and sharing genuine companionship with someone? Not every relationship requires that you stay in it until your last breath in this lifetime.

A lot of women make the excuse that they don't have time to meet new men because they have to take care of the kids. But remember that your kids will very likely be much happier if you're happy too, so meeting new men just might be the ticket to a happier family life down the line.

If your career gets in the way, think of the times during the day when you can set aside 30 to 60 minutes of your time to meet a new man. It could be the 20 minutes in the morning when you're having your coffee and donut. It could be the lunch hour. It could be that short walk through the park on the way to the train station after work. There are opportunities everywhere!

Get a good book to help you come up with ideas. There are fun books that have fun interesting questions and there are books that have hundreds of ways of spicing up your love life. Don't rely on just your ideas. Take advantage of other people's good ideas. Our lives get so busy, it can really help keep the creativity alive by using other peoples good ideas to improve our love life.

If you are tolerating abuse, it is because you believe that no one else could love you. If you are being verbally, mentally, emotionally, or physically abused, the only way you will ever love yourself is to get out of this relationship. I hope with all of my heart that today—right now—will be the time you decide to get out, because this will be the beginning of your life filled with self-love and joy.

If you feel afraid of being alone and without a partner, this is because no one has yet taught you how to love yourself, to honor your feelings, and to follow what those feelings are telling you, which is why you may feel insecure. You were most likely taught to follow what others told you in order to gain acceptance and love by everyone other than your own self.

Admitting your truth to yourself is the only way you will finally open the door to self-love. Of course I will share the rest of this process with you; but there are a lot of bases to cover because there are many different areas of life that reflect how you feel about yourself; I must bring them into your conscious awareness to help you awaken to the real truth inside of you, which is the foundation of self-love.

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