Why Space in a Relationship Is Not a Bad Thing

Space in a relationship is a delicate balance. If you have too much space then you start to grow apart and feel like the relationship is lacking a certain intimacy, but if you don't create any space in a relationship you can feel smothered and lose your identity inside of it.

Space does not mean that you do not include the other person in your life and activities. Instead, it means nurturing and maintaining your relationship with yourself so that you can be a healthy you when you are with your partner.

Many people jump into a relationship and leave all of their past activities and interests behind to spend time with their new interest, their partner. Before long that old life has become a distant memory and doing things together is all there is left.

Your unique identity is one of the things your partner fell in love with when they met you. Sure you had a lot of similarities and shared interests that brought you together, but you also added something to their life that got them excited about you. Once you get into a relationship it is easy to lose that unique quality and instead adapt to what your partner likes or does or says instead. This is not healthy for you or your partner and you should be looking for ways to build your relationship with yourself back up.

Simple ways to maintain your relationship with yourself are:

Going for a long walk

Learning a new skill

Working on your own personal development

Meditating in your favorite peaceful place

Whatever allows you to reflect on yourself and your uniqueness, and build yourself up to be someone you are proud of, is an activity that you should be doing at least weekly if not daily. You will not always have your partner in your life but you will always have yourself, and you need to take care of that relationship with yourself at all times.

Giving each other space also helps to build trust in the relationship. If you are constantly together, without any time alone, then the first time one of you tries to do something on your own it can become quite a jealous experience.

The partner left at home can be left feeling uneasy because they are not used to being without you. Unnecessary phone calls to check up on you can quickly become annoying not only to you but to anyone you are around as well. This can cause a disagreement or a fight and quickly become a major issue in the relationship.

On the other hand, if you have maintained a close relationship with time alone right from the beginning you will feel that it is a normal part of your relationship and trust will have been built from day one when you are apart. You will come back together without negative feelings and fights and anger will be avoided.

These are two important reasons that space should be present in a relationship. You owe it to each other to allow yourselves some time apart doing things that strengthen your individuality. It creates a happier and healthier relationship.