From the time I was a child I felt like I experienced an abnormal amount of fear. What the cause of it is I will never know. Perhaps a genetic anomaly, neurons misfiring, or a spiritual malady. What I do know is for most of my life I have wanted to be fearless. I wanted desperately to be rid ... Views: 1175
This article will be important to remember as you gather this holiday season with the men you know and love. It is not a festive topic, which I would prefer, but it is a topic that has been filling my thoughts as of late. The Penn State scandal weighs heavy on my heart and my being having ... Views: 1443
Did you know that October is National Domestic Violence Awareness Month? Did you know that the ribbon for preventing domestic violence is purple? Did you see any purple ribbons this October? You probably saw a lot of pink ribbons. While breast cancer is a very serious issue that deserves the ... Views: 1167
My passion in looking at men and trauma comes primarily from my personal experience as a young boy, first growing up in a violent alcoholic home and then having to deal with the impact of that trauma long into my thirties — and long into my sobriety. I still have vivid memories sitting on the ... Views: 1834
I was recently invited to speak at an event in the same small Virginia town where I started my recovery journey and had the chance to be with some of the people with whom I first got sober 17 years ago. There were the guys I called the Fantastic Four: my first sponsor, my first best friend in ... Views: 1785
Most of the men I’ve talked to over the years in the journey through recovery can identify some point in their lives when they realized it was not okay to express certain feelings or behaviors, especially if those feelings showed weakness, vulnerability or sensitivity. Crying above all was ... Views: 1760
It goes without saying that choosing to enter treatment or a Twelve Step program presents a unique set of challenges. One that many people do not anticipate is the experience of entering a culture in which people communicate. For men especially, this can be an unfamiliar and uncomfortable ... Views: 6844
It doesn’t take much to figure out why many men are so resistant to therapy. We come by it naturally. From the time we are boys and all through adulthood, we are literally trained not to do anything that remotely resembles therapy. Think about the expectations for therapy or any form of personal ... Views: 1205
It is well-known that trauma and addiction are closely linked. Years of clinical research have demonstrated that many individuals who struggle with addiction report exposure to trauma during the course of their lives. It is not uncommon for those dealing with addictions to have experienced any ... Views: 1816
As I have been studying men and recovery from addiction off and on for more than 15 years, I have arrived at some nascent ideas that I am sure are not unique to me, but are compelling nonetheless. In essence, something happens to us as men and women during the process of recovery from addiction ... Views: 1550