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Articles from Janet Pfeiffer | Selfgrowth.com
- ANGRY? GET OVER IT! - by Submitted on May 24, 2017 from Janet PfeifferToday my husband and I had our fifth fight. Not bad for a twenty year marriage but regardless, for an anger management professional such as myself, I didn't handle it very well. Actually, fight is not an accurate description as it was more like a huff, that is we got annoyed at each other. Let ...
Views: 1411 - Betrayal, Injustice, and Loss: Getting Beyond the Anger - by Submitted on Nov 27, 2013 from Janet PfeifferOne of the predominant complaints I hear from my clients is "This isn't fair!" Referring to an incident where they or someone else has suffered a perceived injustice, they feel angered that things were not equitable. There is a universal misconception that if you play by the rules you will be ...
Views: 2088 - Bully Politicians and What We Must Learn From Them - by Submitted on Mar 09, 2016 from Janet PfeifferIf you've been following the presidential debates, you are well aware of the bullying behaviors of some of our candidates. Gone are the days when politicians debated national and global issues. Shockingly, but not surprisingly, the debates have mutated into verbal warfare against each opponent. ...
Views: 1305 - Conquering Depression: There is Hope - by Submitted on Aug 20, 2014 from Janet PfeifferRegardless of how many tragedies occur in this country due to mental health issues, for many Americans there is still a stigma attached to those who suffer. Few are willing to openly address the issue. Tragedies such as Adam Lanza's mass murder of over twenty innocent elementary school children ...
Views: 1328 - Creating a Cooperative Company Culture - by Submitted on May 13, 2015 from Janet PfeifferThe latest buzz word in business today is "company culture". It refers, in part, to the overall atmosphere and mission of the company. Many entrepreneurs begin the best of intentions and hire people who have the same values and commitment to their objective. Yet somewhere along the line, in the ...
Views: 1978 - DEAL WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE USING C~U~R~B~APPEAL - by Submitted on Sep 21, 2016 from Janet PfeifferWe all have challenging people in our lives yet unfortunately few of us have been properly trained in how to effectively deal with them. Well, that's going to change today. In no particular order, using the an acronym "C~U~R~B Appeal", you will learn tips that will better enable you to get ...
Views: 1834 - Dealing With Insults Effectively - by Submitted on Jun 18, 2015 from Janet PfeifferMy husband is brutal: he teases and torments me unmercifully. But I'm just as bad. From the moment we wake up until we crawl exhausted into bed at the end of the day, we are constantly harassing one another. In fact, the first words out of his mouth as he opens his eyes at 5 am are "Are you ...
Views: 1426 - Debunking Six Common Myths About Anger - by Submitted on Jul 23, 2014 from Janet PfeifferI've been presenting seminars on healing anger for twenty years and it never ceases to amaze me how much misinformation is circulating about one of life's most powerful emotion. I've decided it is time to debunk some of the most common myths. So without further ado, let me begin with... Myth ...
Views: 2290 - Depression and Global Consciousness - A Very Unique Perspective - by Submitted on Aug 27, 2014 from Janet PfeifferI recently read an article that described depression as "a psychological reaction to the violent deformities of the modern world." I found that statement deeply provocative and began to ponder it's meaning. "Anger turned inward" doesn't satisfy me anymore. I do not subscribe to the belief that ...
Views: 1537 - Diffusing Family Tension - by Submitted on Apr 01, 2015 from Janet PfeifferI've spent over twenty years working with families as a spiritual life coach. Many of my clients divulge painful or embarrassing situations that their families are struggling with, believing there must be something wrong with them since other families they know appear so well adjusted. I assure ...
Views: 1636 - Doorbells, Dishtowels, Ducks, and Cake Relieve Anger - by Submitted on Oct 29, 2014 from Janet PfeifferDucks, dishtowels, and doorbells: one wouldn't think they're connected to anger in any way. Cake, on the other hand, is a no-brainer: when upset, eat some. Plain and simple. No one can be angry when stuffing their mouths with a confectionery delight topped with butter cream icing and sugar ...
Views: 1504 - D~U~C~A~P Method of Dealing With a Difficult Person - by Submitted on Apr 06, 2016 from Janet PfeifferWe could all use a few suggestions for dealing with those difficult coworkers, obnoxious family members, or challenging neighbors that find their way into our lives. Some really know how to push our buttons and bring out the worst in us; others are stubborn or opinionated; still others can be ...
Views: 1577 - Emotioanl Intelligence and Anger - by Submitted on May 25, 2016 from Janet PfeifferIn 1995, author, psychologist, and science journalist, Daniel Goleman, wrote a book entitled, Emotional Intelligence which made its way to The New York Times bestseller list for a year-and-a-half. It was a relatively new concept designed to assist companies in determining which characteristics ...
Views: 1275 - Emotioanl Intelligence and Anger - by Submitted on May 25, 2016 from Janet PfeifferIn 1995, author, psychologist, and science journalist, Daniel Goleman, wrote a book entitled, Emotional Intelligence which made its way to The New York Times bestseller list for a year-and-a-half. It was a relatively new concept designed to assist companies in determining which characteristics ...
Views: 1279 - EMOTIONAL /SPIRITUAL RECOVERY FROM TRAUMATIC EVENTS - by Submitted on Apr 19, 2017 from Janet PfeifferLife can change in a heartbeat. A few weeks ago, a family was stopped at a red light and rear-ended by a drunk driver. Their 10-year old son, Matthew, suffered a severe head trauma and is in a medically induced coma. The prognosis is not good and the family struggles to make sense of what was an ...
Views: 1795 - EXPOSING COMMON MISCONCEPTIONS ABOUT ANGER - by Submitted on Aug 30, 2017 from Janet PfeifferI've been presenting seminars on understanding and healing anger for 25 years and it never ceases to amaze me how much misinformation is circulating about one of life's most powerful emotions. Lack of accurate facts and techniques can have serious repercussions in every aspect of life from ...
Views: 1599 - Family Feuds, Quick Tips to Resolve Them - by Submitted on Nov 19, 2014 from Janet PfeifferFamilies: they can be our greatest source of joy or a never ending cause of stress. Some might like to have a few parts replaced, others may prefer to trade theirs in for a more suitable model. Some are grateful to have a family regardless while others would prefer to travel through life solo. ...
Views: 1433 - Fear or Faith; Anger or Peace? - by Submitted on Mar 04, 2015 from Janet PfeifferWhen I was a child my dad would take all of us for a "Sunday drive". Mom, my sisters, and I would pile into his 1950's Chevy sedan with the green vinyl seat covers and off we'd go. I never knew where he was taking us or when we would arrive home. But two things I knew for sure: Dad would ...
Views: 1389 - Fear: The Good, the Bad, and the Solutions - by Submitted on Nov 20, 2013 from Janet PfeifferI've never met anyone who wasn't afraid of something. I have encountered those who claim they aren't scared of anything but upon deeper introspection, they realize that there are things in life that they worry about or that concern them. (Both worry and concern are milder forms of fear.) There ...
Views: 1358 - Finding Inner Peace- - by Submitted on Jun 04, 2014 from Janet PfeifferNo matter where you go in life, you'll find that humans share similar goals: we are all seeking happiness, success, good health, wealth, and love. Some are fortunate to acquired some or all of them. And yet as quickly as we obtain them we can lose them or they can disappoint and hurt us. You ...
Views: 1598 - FIVE EASY STEPS TO INNER PEACE - by Submitted on Nov 15, 2017 from Janet PfeifferOne of my favorite authors, the late Dr. Wayne Dyer, once stated that "There is no way to peace. Peace is the way." This seemed rather contradictory to the common belief that a peaceful state of existence is a destination we arrive at after traversing a righteous path. Wayne challenges us to ...
Views: 1662 - Five Steps to Inner Peace - by Submitted on Dec 16, 2015 from Janet PfeifferOne of my favorite authors, the late Dr. Wayne Dyer, once stated that "There is no way to peace. Peace is the way." This seemed rather contradictory to the common belief that a peaceful state of existence is a destination we arrive at after traversing the correct path. Wayne challenges us to ...
Views: 1461 - Five Tips to Mediate a Dispute - by Submitted on Nov 06, 2013 from Janet PfeifferI enjoy a good robust debate. I find it can be very stimulating and present an opportunity for me to learn something new. In every facet of life, we encounter individuals with whom we have disagreements. Recently, a woman in her forties came into my office seeking suggestions as to how she could ...
Views: 1132 - Forgiveness and Inner Peace - the Connection - by Submitted on Jul 09, 2014 from Janet PfeifferForgiveness: so many misconceptions and misunderstandings; so many who believe forgiveness is reserved for a chosen few or must be preceded with an apology. Still others feel at times that it is impossible or worse, that there are those not deserving of its graces. And so they suffer...all of ...
Views: 1492 - FORGIVENESS: HOW TO Part 2 - by Submitted on Jun 07, 2017 from Janet PfeifferIn last week's show, we spoke about why some people choose not to forgive and why it's essential to do so. There are many reasons and two of the biggest are: they feel the person is not deserving of being forgiven; 2. they feel that should they grant pardon, the other party will think the ...
Views: 1337 - FORGIVENESS: WHY WE DON'T, BUT NEED TO AND HOW Part 1 - by Submitted on May 31, 2017 from Janet PfeifferIs there someone in your life that you either refuse to forgive or are having a hard time with? I've often heard people make statements such as "I'll never forgive them for what they did!" Or, "Some things should never be forgiven." Still others feel that some people simple do not deserve ...
Views: 1523 - Four Simple Ways to Reduce Stress - by Submitted on Mar 26, 2014 from Janet PfeifferAs I entered the room I could feel the tension of the forty-eight individuals seated at the oblong conference tables. I was about to present a workshop to these teachers on managing stress. Conditions for educators across the nation have become increasingly more demanding as states mandate more ...
Views: 1099 - Free Speech: We Can't Afford the High Price Tag - by Submitted on Jan 17, 2013 from Janet PfeifferAmerica, despite all of her current woes, still remains the greatest country in the world. One of our ultimate freedoms is the right to openly express ourselves without fear of retribution. Journalists, reporters and news broadcasters are all guaranteed protection under the Constitution. Free ...
Views: 2136 - Get Difficult Relationships on the Right TRAC - by Submitted on Dec 03, 2014 from Janet PfeifferFor the most part, I don't associate with people who difficult to get along with. Being a sole entrepreneur, I am not subjected to dealing with obnoxious coworkers, irate customers or demanding bosses (although I am tough to work for but fortunately I get along very well with myself). Socially, ...
Views: 1323 - GOOD L~U~C DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE - by Submitted on Jul 12, 2017 from Janet PfeifferLast week, I spoke before a group of business professionals about dealing with difficult people. It seems that no matter where we are in life, whether at home with our families, in social settings, at work, or just out and about, we encounter challenging and obnoxious people. The first issue we ...
Views: 1508 - Grief, Healing, and Wholeness - by Submitted on Sep 09, 2015 from Janet PfeifferElizabeth Kubler-Ross defined the five stages of grief in her 1969 book, On Death and Dying. Grief is a deeply personal process and each individual experiences it on their own terms. Some may endure all five stages, others only a portion; some progress in a seemingly reasonable period of time, ...
Views: 1791 - HA-HA SORB APPROACH TO BULLIES - by Submitted on Jun 21, 2017 from Janet PfeifferPeople don't typically want to interact with those they consider to be bullies or tyrants. Yet contrary to popular belief, bullies are not bad people. It's their behaviors that are appalling. They act out their pain, loneliness, insecurities, and so on in the most offensive and unkind ways. But ...
Views: 1442 - Healing Anger and Abuse With Help From Beyond - by Submitted on Mar 11, 2015 from Janet PfeifferI was truly blessed: when my first husband and I married I acquired a second set of parents. I could not have loved "Bob" and "Mary" more and their fondness for me was generously reciprocated. For the eighteen years I was with their son, we were family. However, my husband's decision to end our ...
Views: 1407 - Healing Anger Natur-ally - by Submitted on Aug 13, 2014 from Janet PfeifferSeveral years ago, I had a client whose nine-year old son had anger issues. His doctor diagnosed him with ADD and suggested medication to quell his angry outbursts. "What do you think?" the mother inquired of me. Not an advocate of prescription medications (with the exception of the most extreme ...
Views: 1481 - Healthy Anger - by Submitted on Mar 25, 2015 from Janet PfeifferAnger is one of the most powerful yet misunderstood emotions we experience. On the one hand, it has become a form of entertainment on TV, video games, social media, and Youtube. Housewives from states across the nation screaming at one another and flipping tables are cheered on each week by ...
Views: 1409 - Her Way or the Highway - by Submitted on Nov 21, 2012 from Janet PfeifferFor more than a month I posted her picture on my social media sites. "Please open your heart and adopt 'Odette'. She is a precious yorkie/poodle mix rescued from a puppy mill." Her photo didn't do her justice. She sat huddled in the back of her cage at RBARI shelter in Oakland, her tortured life ...
Views: 1516 - How Dare You Judge Me! - by Submitted on Sep 10, 2014 from Janet PfeifferI'm reasonably confident in saying that there's not a person on this planet who has not felt unfairly judged at some point. While we may feel justified in imposing verdicts on one another, when we are on the receiving end the feeling can be quite hurtful. It is not uncommon to react with anger, ...
Views: 1910 - How to Always Be Right and Win an Argument Every Time - by Submitted on Apr 16, 2014 from Janet PfeifferDisagreements - those annoying irritations that throw a monkey wrench into our otherwise blissful lives and disrupt any possible chances we have of experiencing serenity and joy. Augh! "Why can't people simply agree with me, even if they don't, and just allow us to coexist peacefully? But, no - ...
Views: 3858 - How to Change Without Changing (and why it's important) - by Submitted on Feb 24, 2016 from Janet PfeifferNot everyone likes change. Some are comfortable precisely where they are and prefer to stay within their comfort zone. Others are more adventurous and enjoy a good challenge. They are more open to trying new things in order to experience something new or perhaps to learn something that will ...
Views: 1597 - How To Communicate Rationally When You're Angry - by Submitted on Oct 21, 2015 from Janet PfeifferCommunication is difficult for most of us. It is one of the most necessary interpersonal skills we need yet few have ever been formally trained in. For most, it's a learn-as-you-go process. What makes effective communicating so challenging is that we all converse on different levels and employ ...
Views: 1646 - HOW TO EFFORTLESSLY WIN WHEN ARGUING - by Submitted on Oct 11, 2017 from Janet PfeifferWouldn't it be wonderful if every time we disagreed with someone we could actually win when arguing? For many, disagreements are viewed as a battle of intelligence between two opposing forces. Each having what they believe to be a strong and valid position on a topic, they engage in verbal and ...
Views: 1479 - How to Make a Difficult Conversation Easier - by Submitted on Feb 04, 2015 from Janet PfeifferConversations can be risky at times. The more sensitive the topic, the more delicately we need to approach it while maintaining a truthful and honest demeanor . The subtle balance between being blunt and abrasive or being effectual is one that many are not equipped to navigate. In my more ...
Views: 1523 - How to Pray When You're Angry - by Submitted on Apr 08, 2014 from Janet PfeifferI begin each day in prayer. It is a vital part of my life. Mine are not the typical "gimme" prayers. I have matured beyond the childish requests of wanting my every wish granted. (With the exception of - I'm still praying for that pony for Christmas!) I've learned that what I'm seeking may not ...
Views: 1486 - HOW TO PREVENT PEOPLE FROM PUSHING YOUR BUTTONS - by Submitted on Dec 13, 2017 from Janet PfeifferWe've all blamed others for how we feel at times. "You really make me angry!" "You hurt my feelings!" "You totally embarrassed me!" Most people don't realize that by allowing others to push our buttons and determine how we feel, we actually give away our personal power. Others decide for us ...
Views: 1941 - How to Start and/or Stop and Argument - by Submitted on May 27, 2015 from Janet PfeifferBeing a part of any relationship for a period of time affords an individual the opportunity to learn what works and what doesn't with each respective person. I may be able to discuss politics with Uncle Joe but Aunt Sue? Never! He's open minded to other people's views and enjoys a lively debate. ...
Views: 1449 - How to Stop Being Angry With Someone - by Submitted on Feb 18, 2015 from Janet PfeifferI find it amusing that very often when I'm scheduled to do a radio show or present a lecture I'm speaking on a subject matter that reflects a lesson I need reminded of. Today's show is no exception. I'm one who is slow to anger and quick to forgive. However, occasionally I find myself trapped in ...
Views: 1553 - I DARE YOU TO ASK THIS - by Submitted on Apr 26, 2017 from Janet PfeifferRelationships are critically important in our lives. On a professional level, being a good team player and getting along well with others enables us to maintain our jobs and receive such perks as bonuses or promotions. Also, connecting with the right people can advance our careers providing we ...
Views: 1634 - I Don't Do Ugly - by Submitted on Oct 11, 2012 from Janet PfeifferShe's strikingly beautiful: tall, large oval-shaped eyes, full lips, dark flowing hair. Her exotic look could land her on the cover of any fashion magazine. Her personality perfectly suits her ample frame. She's outgoing and bubbly, intense and opinionated and I've enjoyed the two years she's ...
Views: 2362 - Inspired Communication - by Submitted on Dec 02, 2015 from Janet PfeifferThe purpose of communication is so individuals can freely share their ideas, feelings, thoughts, and needs with one another as a means of better understanding themselves and the situation at hand. However it can present a unique set of challenges for several reasons: 1) As children we are not ...
Views: 1447 - Intercept Anger Before It Begins - by Submitted on Nov 26, 2014 from Janet PfeifferWe all get angry. It's a normal part of our human experience. Anger is neither wrong nor bad. As with all emotions, it serves a valuable purpose and in this case alerts us to the fact that something is amiss and needs our attention to correct. It is how we choose to express and apply it that ...
Views: 1358