The Secret” is a wonderful book. All of us need to remember that life is a reflection. And please know that the concept of what ‘you put out is what you get back’ is many thousands of years old.

Do you feel that you have negative thinking? Most of us do to varying degrees. Our parents may not have been the best role models, let alone what happens at school and with our peers.

Take a moment and go inside yourself and listen to your inner chatter. If you hear anything like ”you are not good enough” ask that part of you where it learned this. Trace it back to the incidents where this belief system began. Was it critical parent or teacher? A friend’s betrayal?

All negative patterns began with a decision you made somewhere based on a hurtful or humiliating situation. The good news is decisions can be changed and a new decision put in its place.

The word ‘decide’ itself means ’of killing’, so when we decide something new, we are killing off the old beliefs. Once you re-trace where your decision was made in your past, imagine yourself in the situation as an adult and talk to the involved parties, claiming the truth that no matter what happened, you are a worthy human being and no one, nowhere is ever permitted to take away your self-esteem. Give yourself permission to reject that old belief and invite in love and acceptance of yourself.

We all feel that we have made mistakes and we all must be willing to forgive ourselves and move on with the intention of a happier, more self-loving life. Old belief patterns can be changed. Hold within yourself “The Secret” that as you shift your inner beliefs, the outer will respond with the same, loving energy.

How often do you find yourself thinking negative thoughts? How about positive thoughts? Are you aware of your inner critic–that voice in your head that says negative comments? Are you able to cancel out that critical voice with healthy, loving thoughts regarding your worth?

Practice doing this and see what happens…

Author's Bio: 

Catherine Cardinal, Ph.D. has been a guest expert on the O'Reilly Factor, Starting Over, Good Day New York, CBS Studio 2, Playboy, Blind Date,, and She's been a commentator on more than 25 U.S. and international radio programs, and featured in Cosmopolitan, Glamour, Redbook, Ladie's Home Journal, In Touch and Publisher's Weekly. The Los Angeles Times best-selling author of A Cure for the Common Life: The Cardinal Rules of Self-Esteem, Catherine is a Relationship Coach, and creator of "The Cardinal Coaching Technique", a Movement Expression Therapist and Anger Management Facilitator. She has taught at The Learning Annex and is on staff at Rejuvalife Vitality Institute in Beverly Hills and The Stress and Anger Management Institute in Manhattan Beach. Her books have been published in seven languages.

Her recent release, Men To Run From, is available on, Barnes and, and at your local bookstore as is “A Cure for the Common Life: The Cardinal Rules of Self-Esteem.”