Why do domestic abuse victims see the abuse dynamic in their home, but fail to recognize it in their divorce proceedings?

The answer to this question is the same answer to the question, “Why doesn’t she awaken to the abuse in her home?” You know the answer: she is part of the very dynamic for which she seeks remedy.

Here are some common and deadly mistakes victims of domestic violence make as they navigate the system en route to divorce closure and protection from abuse.

1) Failure to recognize the possibility (much less the reality) of the abuse dynamic between themselves and their own attorneys.

2) Failure to realize how their divorce lawyer’s fees will be paid after the initial retainer runs out.

3) Failure to understand the impact of “He who pays directs what is placed before the court.”

4) Failure to appreciate that abuse is about control in family court, too.

5) Failure to know the difference between “use of legal process” and “abuse of legal process.”

6) Failure to grasp the distinction between what is truly within their domain and what lies in the domain of their opposition.

7) Failure to know successful warfare strategies, much less how to put them into place in the context of their divorce.

If you are seeking remedy for abuse via family court, first ask yourself if you are ready to end being abused. Because, if you haven’t fully digested and answered this question, chances are you are going from the frying pan to the fire of legal domestic abuse.

Author's Bio: 

For more information about how to successfully navigate the system, I invite you to check out Legal Domestic Abuse: How to Successfully Navigate the System. Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D. helps people recognize, end and heal from domestic abuse at home and in court. ©2009 Jeanne King, Ph.D. www.PreventAbusiveRelationships.com