Still Hurting 2 Years After Breakup: Still Heartbroken Years Later

Healing after breakup is never easy. Sometimes the end of a relationship hits you like a bus. You never even see it coming. Other times the warning signs are clear as day, but you never seem to see them until it's too late. Regardless, you still have time to start the healing process and get your ex back... if you choose to do so.

First, actually let the relationship end. Don't keep hanging on to something that's dangling by a thread. Cut the thread and start over with a larger, more solid thread. Otherwise, your relationship will continue to teeter on the edge of destruction.

So how do you let the relationship end? By giving your ex time and space away from you. Break off contact for a while. No texts. No phone calls. No emails. No midnight drives over to their apartment. Actually be gone from their life so they know what it's like to miss you.

Next, no matter how hurt you are, don't seek revenge. It always comes back to bite you in the butt. Obvious revenge is taking a set of car keys and scratching the side of your ex's car or slicing their tires.

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A more subtle type of revenge is saying mean things about them, putting them down, or talking to other people about them behind their back. Don't stoop to such a low level on either account unless you have no intention of ever getting back together.

Relax and do something fun. There's no strings attached for the time being so do something you love. Just because you're broken hearted doesn't mean you have to let your spirits dip you into depression.

Being sad and lonely won't help bring your ex back, so why feel miserable? Now is your chance to call your own shots and do whatever you want to do. Take advantage. Besides, your ex wants to fall back in love with the happy, fun you, not the miserable, depressed, angry you.

Lastly, take responsibility. Don't focus on all the things your partner did wrong in the relationship. Instead, identify the things you could do better and commit to becoming a better person. Don't point fingers. Don't blame your ex.

When you take responsibility and take the lead in figuring out what went wrong and work on improving yourself, then your ex will follow. Healing after breakup involves staying positive and realizing no one will ever be perfect, but you can always STRIVE to be perfect. A breakup doesn't have to be the end of the world.

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Wondering how you are going to reconnect and bring your dying relationship to life again? Well, you are not the only one. Though your relationship started with a bang and it was sheer bliss, it could be dying right now on account of the problems and stress that have cropped up. However, there are thousands who have managed to save their relationships. These tips will help you tremendously.

Get to the root cause

You have to pinpoint the actual reasons as to why your relationship started to show cracks. Once you do this it is easier to get rid of them. To do this you will have to make an honest effort to change and make sure that all your bad habits are given up.

Stop being afraid and useless

Feelings of insecurity and helplessness normally follow a broken relationship. It is up to you to recognize these dangerous feelings and deal with them. Start to develop confidence in yourself and your abilities to shine in society. Don't be intimidated. Get on top of the situation and learn to interact in society again.

Build trust

It is obvious that you will have to build trust all over again. The past has taken its toll on the trust you and your partner had for each other. This will take some time but it is an important step towards getting your relationship back. Once you learn to trust one another again, you will be able to have a better and more meaningful relationship.

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Mend the cracks

You have seen what mistrust, betrayal, infidelity etc can do to a relationship. Whatever the reason for the cracks in your relationship was, it is imperative that you mend those cracks. Love, patience, caring and honesty is the cement that can do this mending. Once the cracks are mended, your relationship has chances of surviving.

Don't try to force it

The more controlling and aggressive you are, the more your partner will try to pull away. This is the time to be gentle and subtly persuasive. Be kind and compassionate. Give your partner time to realize that breaking up is not the ideal thing to do. Let your partner see that you are ready to make compromises to help the relationship and they will cooperate.

Salvage the good

Never mind if you have made mistakes in the past. There is no relationship that does not go through the storm. But it is the relationship that has a good solid foundation that will weather any storm! Salvage the good and strong qualities of your relationship and you will not fail to keep it going.

Be responsible

Most relationships fail due to lack of accountability and responsibility of one or both partners. It is important that feelings of accessibility, safety and responsibility are uppermost in the relationship. This will make both partners capable of successfully handling negative and difficult feelings.

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After being abandoned by your ex, you're feeling broken and while you might want to get your ex back there seems to be no way out. One the one hand your ex has dumped you and in all probability is still very upset with you, meanwhile, you're on the verge of snapping internally.

When in such a mess, how would you feel if you could find out how to make your ex repent the decision to break up?

Here's how things stand. Your ex has left you and you want to arouse feelings of regret and sorrow in your ex's mind. So, how do you plan to go about achieving your goal of getting your ex back?

If you think begging and pleading your ex to come back is going to melt his/her heart and make them come back, you are wrong. Presenting yourself as a person of fragile character can only make your ex feel pity but not love for you. Besides how would you go on living like a loser with your ex even if this trick works! The right thing to do after the break up is to do away with your impulses and act sensibly.

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A more rational strategy is not to spill the beans in front of your ex by crying out your love for him/her. The breakup has already done a lot of damage to your self-respect so now's the time to restore some pride. Show up at your ex's home or make a call telling him/her that you've enjoyed the time spent with him/her and that you dropped by just to wish luck for future.

You might not realize the power of your message but in reality it will hit your ex like a bazooka! After so much happened in your life, you're as cool as a cucumber, and your ex will start to constantly ponder over your behavior.

After doing the right thing, try to move ahead in your life. Concentrate fully on your job and try to outperform your colleagues. You also need to get social and start making up for lost time with old friends. In a nutshell, have fun with your life!

Your ex will soon take in that he/she made a bad call by announcing the break up. Despite all the hard talk earlier on, your ex will feel drawn towards you. Your aura will attract your ex like a magnet and getting your ex back will become like a walk in the park for you.

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Getting your ex back is something that actually requires a number of things from you. It is a great thing to wish for, at the same time you will need to be ready to have some understanding at the back of your mind to be able to get it done.

Nothing good comes easy:

You will first need to understand that nothing good comes easy. This translates to the fact that getting your ex back will require some sacrifice on your part. This is to tell you that relenting on your forward moving effort will not make things work out at all. Instead of relenting, you will have to learn to forge ahead.

It will not happen over night:

You will need to remember that the break up didn't actually happen overnight, this is a pointer to the reality that the make up will never happen overnight, and it will surely require a process. An effort to quicken things up may as well be seen as an effort to jump bail. You should then be willing to make patience your closest companion if you really want to succeed in getting your ex back.

Apology can do it all:

Have you ever had cause to apologize to your ex all through the period of your relationship? If yes, then the time has come for you to do it again. But if your response is no, then this is the time for you to take the first step. Of course it isn't gonna be easy, but you still need to take the step anyway. Your inability to apologize might have been the bone of contention in the first instance.

You also will need to understand that some of the things that keep human relationship intact is the ability to say 'sorry', 'thank you' and 'please'. If you are lagging in this regard, I guess it is high time you took steps to make yourself better.

Consistency will go a long way in helping you. You will need to be consistent in your effort. If not, you may never succeed in getting your ex back.

Timing is critical when getting your ex back. Ex partners often consider a rebound relationship or just casual sex to get over you. You need to act right now. What you need is a complete, step-by-step system to take your hand and show you exactly what to do next to get your ex back in 30 days or less. For the whole system and all you would ever need to know, check it out here right now: Get Back My Ex

Author's Bio: 

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