I recently met my longtime Hollywood crush Ewan McGregor…you know him…the young Jedi Master (Obi Wan Kenobi) in Star Wars, Christian the penniless writer in Moulin Rouge, the disillusioned son in Big Fish…OK well, I didn’t “technically” meet him. I stood outside the theatre door after seeing him in The Real Thing on Broadway. I got a photo and an autograph along with a dozen other nameless fans who stood in 40 degree weather in an attempt to fulfill our fantasy that we might strike up witty conversation and then head off to cocktails at some posh New York City club and chat the night away with this wonderful man.

Now, clearly I know I am not going to say anything so witty or different from the next guy but hey, a girl can dream right? The truth is he is greeting US, all of US, not me then scribbled his name as we snapped a photo. Me, becoming a 13 year old girl, him with his signature cool slight smile. That was it. Oh wait, we did chat. I said, “thank you, loved the show.” So witty of me, right? He said, “thank you.”

So, why am I telling you this story other than I obviously want to brag that I met, well interacted, with Ewan McGregor? Because I don’t know Ewan, we don’t really know any of the stars in Hollywood, music or the media – we know of them based on what the media gives us or who we see them portray as characters in movies or on television. We get snippets in interviews and then we create the rest.

Don’t we do this in our everyday life too? Tell ourselves stories, fill in the gaps with what we want life to be like then feel bummed out when life isn’t what we’ve expected. I do. I create unrealistic expectations for myself, family and friends which ultimately let me down.
I realized I had expected Ewan to stop and chat, ask me to pontificate on the similarities between The Real Thing and Moulin Rouge, of which there are many by the way, only to realize he really just got off of work and probably wanted nothing more than to get back to where he was staying so he could chill out and call his wife and kids. Or not.

See, I did it again. It’s so easy to create a story. It sneaks up. As I’ve grown on my spiritual journey I realize I do this less but my humanity still practices creating expectations to give me the opportunity to practice the lesson of being in the moment; to be present to what is true for me in my life today. I can accept what is and do my part to make any situation better but I will only create pain and dis-ease for myself and others if I expect someone to behave like I want them to if it’s not who they are.

So, thank you Ewan for being exactly who you are and for helping me remember to be kind to myself and others. I appreciate that you do the work you do. I don’t have any idea about the perils and perks of your profession, but I know it entertains me, touches me and makes me think and feel. I guess this experience make me see your humanity and reminds me that respect and gratitude is the only witty words I have for you.

The task for me now is to practice embracing what is; blended family, slow starting ministry, imperfect parenting, and human relationships with unrealistic expectations!

Author's Bio: 

As an Ordained Ministerial Counselor, Kelli follows her heart in order to guide others on their spiritual journey. A seeker from a young age, Kelli has always known she would work with others to help them find answers for their life. Through specialized counseling practices, workshops and her writing, Kelli illuminates the path for others as she enjoys a joy filled life.

In her previous career as a Professional Organizer, Kelli worked with clients to clear their mental, physical and spiritual clutter so they could enjoy a calmer, clutter free life. Kelli is the author of “The Clutter Breakthrough – Your Five Step Solution to Freedom from Clutter Forever” a book dedicated to looking at the source of the “stuff” that keeps you blocked off from the life you want to live.

Kelli is a national speaker, inspiring others to look within to create their amazing life. Kelli has an associate’s degree in business administration but the degree she is most proud of is her First Degree Black Belt which she earned in December of 2007 from Kovar’s Satori School in Granite Bay, California. Discipline in the martial arts is key to Kelli’s success in life and with clients, “to stay grounded with clients when they are dealing with the emotions of their life is critical”