My Wife Says She's Done With Me: What Does It Mean When Your Wife Says She's Done

When you say that your wife isn't in love with you anymore there is the impression that you don't believe that anything can be done to stop a divorce from occurring. It is very common for the husband to be totally surprised when his wife reveals her unhappiness and desire to end the marriage. For those of you are who are currently going through this, please read this article in full as there are things that you can do to get your wife to stay with you and keep your home life and marriage intact.

Thinking that your wife no longer wants you, you may believe that it is her fault that this change is occurring. It is very common for people to displace the blame. The fact is a woman just doesn't go from loving her husband one to disliking him and wanting a divorce the next day. The process of separation is gradual, and it usually occurs because of something that you've done. You wife has more than likely been feeling this way for some time now, but you are just now noticing or have just now decided to finally to do something about it. The time is now for change and resolution. Simply say I'm sorry for the things that you've done so that you can begin to heal your marriage.

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An additional factor that causes a breakdown of the marriage and results in you claiming that your wife is no longer happy in the marriage is the change in the roles of the spouses. Marriage is about going through life and facing everything together such as starting a family. However, it is very important to note that marriage is also a romantic union. The union happened because of a mutual attraction nothing more or less. However, as a marriage progresses people may be more caught up in paying bills and raising children that they place the romanticism to the side. This should not happen as it will end a marriage. This can be corrected by simply taking the time to rekindle the passion and romance in the marriage by dedicating time to one another; it really is that simple.

Those were the times when your wife desired you, and if you bring back the romance she will want you all over again. It is important that you remember that your wife married you because she is in love with you and only wanted to be with you for the rest of her life-this is why she is dedicated herself to you.

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If you expect to save a marriage from divorce, it is essential that all money matters that can become a concern down the line are discussed at the very onset. This will ensure that you and your partner remain on the same page in respect to the financial aspect of the relationship, and this will also tell you both just what the other person expects. Understand that if seemingly small fiscal aspects are not discussed early on; they can turn quite murky down the line.

Joint or Individual Accounts:

Whether the two of you wish to keep individual bank accounts or a single joint account is something that the both of you need to decide. You really do not have to view having a joint account as a compulsion, and as long as you are transparent with each other in your money matters, there is no reason why having individual accounts should be a problem.

Keep no Secrets:

Although keeping a small stash of money is quite common in a number of married couples, it is important that this not magnify into anything more. Do know that keeping secrets such as this or about your overall spending habits can not only have an adverse effect on the household's expenses, but can also hurt your relationship.

Discuss Financial Goals:

We agree that love and trust play very important roles in a marriage, but so does knowing what the partner expects or hopes for in the form of financial stability. Make sure that you discuss your finances; and consult each other in making decisions concerning budgets, investments, major purchases, etc. In case you have different ideas about your expectations, respect each other's points of view. Understand that different people have different outlooks in respect to money.

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A Drop in Income:

Problems in a marriage can also occur when there is a sudden drop in the household income. In the event that you have experienced a recent fiscal downfall, doing the following could help, not just in easing the expenses, but also in saving your marriage.

• Make a list of all your expenses. Identify areas where spending can be reduced, and these could come in the form of eating out less frequently, opting for a cheaper cable TV plan, cutting down on mobile phone expenses, etc.

• Make a conscious effort to control spending. For instance, you can limit the use of your credit card/s only for medical procedures/emergencies. If you've worked on building a savings account, refrain from accessing its funds unless absolutely necessary.

• See a financial consultant. This can be particularly helpful if you don't fully understand your finances or are in a lot of debt.

Remember, if you wish to save a marriage from divorce, it is important that you find solutions to your problem as opposed to delving on what caused the problem in the first place. To save that marriage from divorce you need to ensure financial transparency in your relationship before anything else. Also, the better you understand your partner's take on money matters, the better are the chances of your marriage surviving.

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If you feel that your marriage is in troubled waters, understand that not all is lost and that there are things that you can do to get your marriage back on track again. After all, there is no dearth of relationships coming back from the brink despite reasons such as lack of intimacy, extra-marital affairs, frequent fights, trial separations, etc. The one thing that you need to remember is that you can save a marriage from divorce if you put in the required time and effort in the process.

In order to save your marriage from divorce, start by identifying if your marriage faces any of these issues.

Is an Apology the Order of the Day?

If you feel that you owe your partner an apology for something that is causing strife in your relationship, it is important that you apologize straightaway. This is simply because your partner needs to know just how you feel. Express concern over your actions, and make a conscious effort in ensuring that the folly is not repeated.

Do You Share Interests?

Even though almost every guide to save marriages talks about this aspect, a surprising number of marriages don't pay enough attention in doing so. Realize that even though you might not necessarily enjoy partaking in an activity that your partner enjoys, it would give you the opportunity to spend some time with each other. Getting your partner to reciprocate by taking part in activities that you enjoy would be the natural progression.

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Does your Partner feel Cramped?

If your partner feels cramped in the relationship, it is a definite sign of trouble. Remember that while it is important for you to be there for your partner, it is also equally important that you let him/her have some personal space. Understand that even the best marriages have partners spending some 'alone' time, and this could be in the form of playing a sport, reading a book, hanging out with friends, or even going on a trip.

Have you Already Initiated Divorce Proceedings?

If you've already initiated divorce proceedings, but now feel that you need to rethink your decision, it's a great start to work on saving your marriage. To save this marriage from divorce you would need to tell your partner just how you feel, and talk about the reasons for rushing into filing for a divorce, why you chose to do and, most importantly, why you changed your mind. Saying "you know why" is simply not enough.

Does your Marriage Face a Barrage of 'Small' Issues?

A number of marriages run into trouble simply because small issues are allowed to intensify into something much bigger. Identity the reason behind your arguments and try your best to resolve them immediately. Understand that effective communication can be a great tool in handling the minor hiccups that a marriage throws your way.

If you still feel that you aren't sure of what you can do in order to save that precious marriage from divorce, do not hesitate to seek professional help. After all, trained marriage counsellors address such issues on an everyday basis.

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If you expect to save a marriage from divorce, it is important that you understand where the problem lies. If you've been having frequent arguments, they could offer insight into what's wrong with the marriage. Given below are some of the more common problems that can be a cause of marital discord.

Financial Strife

Money matters figure right up there when it comes to problems in marriages. Understand that financial duress can cause couples to turn on each other with feelings of resentment or frustration. What you should do if you want to save that marriage from divorce is to ensure that both partners are part of planning the household finances. What this also means is that both partners need to take equal responsibility for the cash inflow as well as outflow.

Growing Distance

If you feel that you and your partner are no longer as close as you were when you first started being together, you should try and take some proactive measures on your own. For example, if your growing work load is the reason behind the growing distance, then you should consider taking some time off to work on your marriage. If you feel that no longer do stuff together, you could indulge in activities that you both find interesting.

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Playing the Blame Game

To save a marriage from divorce, it is important that you do not think of it as a battle with your spouse that you need to win. If you've been preoccupied with trying to figure out how to put the blame on your spouse for things that go wrong, you're the one who's got it all wrong. Instead of playing the blame game, your efforts should focus on addressing how the given problem can be fixed.

Infidelity

Any sign of infidelity is sure to cause marital discord, but if you want your marriage to work, then it does need to be addressed. Simply overlooking instances of infidelity would serve no purpose, although it could increase the frequency of its occurrence. If you do decide to look beyond the betrayal, you need to be absolutely certain. Dealing with the issue immediately is required, and you should then work on rebuilding the broken trust.

Understand and Communicate Your Needs:

When you see that your marriage is failing, and once you've identified what the problem is, you need to find out what you want. Making an actual list of what you expect from the marriage and your partner will give you more perspective, and you should ideally get your partner to do this as well. Once you've done this, exchange these lists and see what the other expects.

Staying objective

When you see that your marriage is breaking, you need to make a decision. You need to establish if you are willing to work on saving the marriage, and if so, then you should be willing to put in the required efforts. Remember, it might not be easy to save your marriage from divorce, but it is possible. Staying positive is vital.

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.

Author's Bio: 

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