As a professor, it is rewarding when a former student seeks my advice long after they have graduated. True respect is earned, not demanded. Leaders that rely on formal authoritative structures for compliance do not connect with the hearts of their subordinates. They may temporarily have the individual's submission to fulfill the tasks at hand, but the respect that comes from willing cooperation is lacking.

"You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you," is how Van Crouch describes a mentoring relationship that aims at touching people's emotions. When a student senses that a professor cares about them personally, they are more likely to take criticism as it is intended, i.e., to help the person improve.

Both parties benefit in such a mentoring relationship. The professor gains the satisfaction of knowing that the former student sought out his advice because respect was earned. Expertise and interpersonal skills are tacitly acknowledged. The one being mentored benefits by the advice given. There's no need to make one's own mistakes when one can learn from the mistakes of a person who has already been in the field one is entering.

I've discussed this mentoring relationship from the perspective of professor/student, however the principle applies to any context. A supervisor who shows sincere interest in the lives of those in his work unit earn respect that cannot be demanded formally. As these employees mature and advance in their careers, former supervisors can serve as mentors years later. It's a rewarding way to gain qualitative depth to one's career that cannot be measured.

Author's Bio: 

Dr. William G. Covington, Jr. has taught at colleges and universities in Missouri, Ohio, Indiana, Massachusetts, and Pennsylvania. Additionally, he has published widely on motivational topics.