I was reading David Deida's book The Way of the Superior Man and he was saying that masculinity seeks freedom and femininity seeks love. Later I was doing Natural Grounding. Then BANG it hit it like a brick on the head! Actually it was my hands that made the sound on my forehead.
Masculinity is to follow a life purpose. Femininity is to fully live the present moment.
I was previously wondering why all Western women I knew who developed their femininity had their masculine side even stronger. They couldn't let go of the ground to flow in their femininity. That’s simply because they’re focussed on achieving things in life and following their life purpose! Almost every teacher is focussed on finding and following your life purpose. Every self-improvement business is focussed on following your life purpose. You rarely if ever hear spiritual teachers talking about fully living the present moment. That’s HUGE.
For a woman living in the forest, it’s easy to focus on fully living the present moment. She'll takes care of her garden and house and her environment will brings her all she needs. For a woman living in the fast-paced competitive Western world where she does not own anything and has her credit cards full, it’s a different story. The first step for anyone is to get what they need for survival. Lots of people get stuck there but we must move from survival to fully living our lives. Then, for a woman who is in her femininity, fully living the present moment is more important than following her life purpose. Being is more important than Doing. She will still have a purpose in life, she will still accomplish things in life, but her priority will always be love. There’s always a balance of feminine and masculine within each person. The question is which is the dominant polarity within each of us.
There’s a HUGE part missing in the multi-billion dollar self-development industry. It’s good to follow your life purpose, to accomplish things in life, to make the world better, to help sick people in India and all that, especially for men. However, you don’t need to be constantly busy achieving more and more things in life even if it’s your life purpose. There's more than your life purpose in life. Slow down, look around you, connect with people around you, be vibrant and joyful and fully live the present moment. This is very important, especially for women.
As a man, do you integrate both the masculine and the feminine into your life? Be the change you want to see in the world. The more you fully live the present moment, the more you will encourage women around you to be the same.
Etienne Charland - Attraction and Intimacy Specialist
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