I Hate My Marriage: I Hate Being Married To My Spouse

A healthy marriage requires partners to be open, trusting and vulnerable. What happens when things go terribly wrong and you are hurt by your spouses words or actions? Is it possible to go on? Begin with forgiveness. Regardless of the outcome this is a necessary step in your own healing process.

Regardless of the hurt and the circumstances surrounding whatever caused the pain, you will always be faced with a choice. Facing conflict with your spouse you must choose between harboring resentment for the duration of your relationship or you may choose to forgive them.

Forgiveness is a deliberate act of your will. By choosing to forgive your spouse you are not accepting nor condoning the behavior that caused the pain. Forgiving your spouse is the decision to no longer allow yourself to feel the pain caused by the event. This aspect of forgiveness is your own personal decision that allows you to liberate yourself from the pain and hurt.

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The offending spouse to be forgiven would need to understand on their own that they have inflicted pain into the marriage and be remorseful for their actions. Once apologies are offered in a condition of remorse and actions are taken to reconcile the marriage then it would be appropriate that they would ask your forgiveness. Allowing for forgiveness at this point puts you in a position of saying that you are willing to put it behind you and move your relationship forward.

I recall a conversation I had earlier this year with a couple who had been together for 54 years. It was wonderful to watch the positive interaction between them knowing that after 54 years they must have been through so much together.

I inquired about the longevity of their relationship. They both chuckled and said it wasn't always easy. The husband remarked that although most of what they struggled with was of his doing, he respected her more and more because of her gracious forgiveness. He continued that she would always allow for them to resolve the conflict moving their relationship forward and once she forgave him she would never bring it up again in the future.

It has taken both of your efforts to get here. One person taking the initiative to make positive changes can make the difference in a relationship. With the proper assistance you will be on your way quickly to restoring your relationship.

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Many women who are so overwhelmed with the affection they feel for their men sometimes think that love is all they need to stay together. But reality will tell you that maintaining a love relationship means more than just having affection for your partner. There are other important ingredients you need to pour in to make your bond stronger and make it last longer.

Married couples should take it upon themselves to nurture their relationship. The nurturing part should not be left to chance in order to make your love grow more each day. Husbands and wives also need to think about some perks that will keep them happy and close together. Each couple may have different preferences as to the things they can do together to keep them connected but what matters is you make these activities a tradition, something you look forward to every time.

Watching a movie together is a favorite past time of many couples. Some of you may have different tastes when it comes to movies but you can always discuss about your preferences when you get the chance. Who knows there might just be a new or old movie that you both want to see even just at home. Movie viewing can give you the opportunity to snuggle up on your sofa or bed and just be close to each other.

Celebrate a special anniversary other than that of the day you got married. Wedding anniversaries are always special to couples but you may want to remember also another unforgettable date and mark it by doing something unique. For instance, you can celebrate the anniversary when you had your first date or when you had our first kiss if you can still remember the date.

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Respecting each other is of utmost importance. Keep in mind that you will always have differences but it doesn't mean you can no longer agree and stay together for a long time. It's a matter of understanding your partner on a deeper level and respecting him or her for his person and his views.

Acceptance of your partner is vital because it is only when you can do this that you will be able to understand your spouse and his traits. This will also let you tolerate your partner's negative side which unaware to you can even influence your spouse to do the same to you.

Another thing married couples do that you may want to start as a tradition is to set aside money you can use for special trips or watching concerts. This has to be separate from your savings and budget that you use to pay your bills so you won't have issues later on. Marriage counselors recommend that a couple needs to have this unique just-for-fun account that you can spend for some perks in your relationship.

Finally, don't hesitate to dream about your future. Plan about you would like to do when your kids no longer live in the house and it's just you and your spouse living together again.

These are only several tips that you can do. Be creative and never hesitate to do something unique for your marriage to keep you happy and close together forever.

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Have things been tense at home? Need to save your marriage and don't know how to begin, especially when you consider how tense things have been between the two of you? Here's one unknown secret: You can save your marriage today by learning how to spice up your marriage with sweet, thoughtful and erotic ideas as these ones below.

1. Show Your Sensually Sweet and Thoughtful Side. Go down on him after a long and stressful day without any expectation for him to reciprocate. If you really want to rock his world, book a weekend at a five star luxury hotel, give him a bath, a full body massage and treat him to your personal concierge service.

2. Extend Thoughtfulness Throughout Your Relationship. Men love to be adored and loved, especially when things are strained between you two. If it's not too much, consider showing extra gestures of thoughtfulness, such as thanking him for taking out the trash or putting the kids to bed without your asking. It's the little things that count and show you are paying attention to his efforts, even when it doesn't seem like you are.

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3. Touch and Kiss Him When You're Not Having Sex with Him. Showing him your affectionate attitude beyond the bedroom, even in the midst of conflict with him, shows that you care, that you love him and that you're not planning on going anywhere any time soon. It's sexy and sweet and endears you to him, which will make the sexual spark between you two even stronger. Remember, men connect through physical attention.

4. Improve Your Kissing Skills. Learning how to be a really good kisser is a great way to reconnect. How you feel about him will be in your kiss, and it will be a feeling he can never deny, no matter what's going on between you. Never underestimate the feminine power you have in pushing those soft lips against his, even when you're not seeing eye to eye.

5. Develop emotional intimacy. Developing emotional intimacy is a choice to build togetherness when you're struggling to connect. Taking about five minutes on a daily basis just to check in with him and see how he's doing can allow him to feel more comfortable in terms of being able to open up with you. There are many ways to build emotional intimacy, but learning how to communicate effectively - by listening more than talking - is an easy and free way to do so. And it works immediately.

Again, when it comes to saving your marriage, there's nothing like learning tricks to spice up your marriage. Save your marriage and reconnect with your husband with a sweet and thoughtful approach that will remind him of the caring and considerate woman you are.

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Ok, so you're getting married in a few months, how prepared are you for marriage? There are many factors about marriage you should ask yourself before diving in headfirst. Sit by the edge of the pool with me for a moment and get your feet a little wet first, then, if you're ready to take the plunge then go ahead and dive right in.

Why are you getting married? The first answer that comes to most people's minds when I ask this question is the feeling they have of being "in love". Ok, I'll buy that one, but I believe you're going to need a flotation device because "love" in the sense of the word that you're thinking about will not keep your marriage afloat. That "kind of love" dissipates over time, and then what are you going to do?

Here are five questions to ask yourself to find out if you really are ready for marriage. Go through these questions with your friend, each taking turns answering and giving your honest opinion.

1) Are your ready to sacrifice your selfish endeavors for the sake of your new spouse? (There is no room in the pool for selfishness in marriage). What if your spouse, after three years of marriage suddenly stops showing their love or stops doing any giving in the marriage? Will you act like a chameleon and do the same? Where will that get you? A healthy marriage will always have a spiritual foundation to base our actions upon.

What do I really need to do to make my spouse love me again? Is it possible to build massive attraction in my spouse?

To learn the killer, advanced strategies to save your marriage, simply click here!

2) Have you accepted the person you're about to marry, faults and all? (If any faults bother you now, there's a good chance they will really bother you after marriage).

3) Are you devoted to the person you are going to marry, through all the trials and tribulations of marriage? This is an important factor that you should really know in your heart before you get married.

4) Are you prepared to give of yourself by being a considerate, compassionate and respectful marriage partner through "principled acts of love"? (There is a big difference between "feeling in love" and actually "being loved" by someone.)

5) Have you set it in your heart that divorce is not an option? (Total commitment is needed by both of you). Commitment is the mainstay of your attitude. If you are committed to staying married until death do you part, then your will do whatever it takes to work on any marriage problems that arise and stay married.

Okay, so there you have it. Are you ready to plunge in? All right then, go ahead and dive right in. Just remember to always remain devoted to the person you married and committed to the marriage and it will make you an excellent swimmer. Eventually, you can throw away the flotation devices for good because you will be like a fish out of water.

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.

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