Many of you are probably have related to the line “its all his/her fault, that *****!!” at some point. In fact about 96% of us live most of our lives without being open to the possibility that we could be the root cause of our own experiences. After all, it isn’t in human nature to want to be wrong is it? But in the words of one cynic, the real question sometimes is “do you want to be right or do you want to be happy?”

How would it be if you opened your mind just a little tried taking full responsibility? My favourite example of this working like a charm is the classic jealously scenario. Mr. Blue is late home from work one evening. He comes home to find one of these two women:

Miss Red

““****king b**t**d is having an affair with his secretary. He always stays out late with her or his friends – I’m going to be so mad with him when he gets back!!!”

Miss Pink

“My darling’s probably stuck in traffic/on the train – I hope he’s ok, I can’t wait to see him”

Do you think Mr. Blue would prefer to come home to Miss Red or Miss Pink? Funny thing is, even if Mr. Blue is very faithful, Miss Red’s behaviour will probably drive him away eventually. On the flip side, even if Mr. Blue is being unfaithful, if he comes home to Miss Pink consistently, he’s more likely to want to be faithful.

So even if Mr. Blue really is the effing bleep that Miss Red thinks he is, to many of us, how much better will her relationships be if she took responsibility for her part in his behaviour?

This is a great tip to remember for those of you that are single as well as those of you in a relationship. It may not be immediately appealing to take the blame, but one thing that responsibility gives you is absolute power. You may not be able to change someone else, but you can change you and often that can give you magical results.

Author's Bio: 

Shay is the author, speaker and the creator of the Grown Up Kiss Chase Technique - the ultimate blueprint for finding love, especially if you're in a bad place right now. She has helped guide many singles through the scary dating jungle and frequently shares her tips and techniques on her website.