Divorce Court - What to Do If You're Afraid to Go There

The idea of stepping into a California divorce court is terrifying for a lot of people, and it is one of the things most people think of first when they hear the word divorce. This, however, is wrong. Television, movies and media in general have made us believe that a divorce always has to go through court proceedings.

Of course, divorce cases in the sunshine state that turn into messy and complicated legal battle sometime can't avoid California divorce court, but not each and every divorce has to be done that way.

I actually had a client years ago who was afraid of courtrooms. The thought of a courtroom made her terribly scared! Unfortunately, I will not be able to disclose the reason to you. Really, we've all heard people who have phobias - heights, water, enclosed spaces, dogs, and so many others - but that was the first time I ever met someone who had an irrational fear of courtrooms.

Anyway, it was fortunate that she came to me for help because I told her that yes, there was indeed a way to get a divorce in California without having to go to a divorce court at all. My many years of experience as a California Family Law Attorney have proven that a court battle just makes things harder than they should be. Keep in mind that if you end up in a California divorce court the judge will end up make all the decisions for you, your spouse, your children, your property, etc.

I told my client, whom we shall call Mrs. T, which it would be much better if she and her spouse would work together to create a Settlement Agreement, or as it used to be called, a Marital Settlement Agreement. Mrs. T initially did not want to communicate in any way with her spouse, but after telling her the advantages of creating a Settlement Agreement and persuading her (a difficult task, mind you), she was able to realize what I was trying to tell her.

First of all, I told Mrs. T that if they made a Settlement Agreement, she and her spouse would know exactly what their judgment would be. Best of all, THEY would get to make all the decisions about how to divide up their assets and debts, not a judge who knows nothing about them or their family.

Another advantage I told Mrs. T was that they would not need to hire lawyers, and we all know that lawyers have pretty pricey legal fees. With two minor children during the time of her divorce, Mrs. T. couldn't afford these expensive fees. Also, creating an agreement would give Mrs. T. and her spouse a much better chance at good, or at least civil, relations even after the divorce.

But the advantage that really convinced Mrs. T. was the fact that she would not have to appear in a California divorce court. She especially liked the fact that she would be able to complete her case by mail.

Once Mrs. T. agreed to the idea of creating a Settlement Agreement with her husband, I explained that there were two ways she could get her judgment. She could either file a declaration or go to a hearing in a California divorce court. I bet you can guess which option she chose.