Confidence and Self Image: What Part in the Game of Life Is Playing You?

Self-image and confidence is not to be taken lightly. You cannot really rise above, or at least stay above your self-image. In fact, your brain acts as a cybernetic mechanism, which is a fancy way of saying "thermostat". Whatever is your set point tends to be your self-fulfilling prophecy.

If you have a low self-image, you tend to struggle more with confidence and fear of rejection. You are less likely to take risks, and I certainly can say that dealing with change will be frightening if you are afraid of going into the unknown.

Now I hear people say often, "a part of me feels like..." I say it myself at times. What most people do not realize is that these "parts" of us can run your life. If you believe the real you is this "part" or that you are your thoughts and memories, you will be a set up for the stories and dramas that you tell yourself are "just the way life is".

Actually, our life experiences are a reflection of the way that we see ourselves.

"We don't see things as they are; we see them as we are" ~Anais Nin

There's science for this. You see there is no "out there". What we see and how we see it has more to do with our perception. We are conditioned to believe that what we do is WHO we are. Actually your "part" that is feeling a certain way has more to do with the way that you wired your brain to think of yourself.

So, for example, if a part of your feels afraid to public speak, it may be related to self-images you have remembered from childhood. It could be when little Johnny laughed at you at the school recital, and you did not realize that his laughter had nothing to do with you. It was just his opinion or perhaps he was not even laughing at you, he could have been daydreaming and did not even notice what you were saying.

We make up stories like this all the time and then we go as far as attaching our very identity to the feelings that we have. If you over-identify with these "parts" you will think that they are the "real deal" the real you. Actually, there is the Mental Me and then there is the real me, the "Magnificent Me". This Magnificent me is the spirit, the Observer, the Being of me.

What we do is separate from this Self but we get it all tangled up and confused and start judging our behavior as if it is WHO we are. Once we confuse "the what" with "the whom", once we believe that the "part" that we play on the stage of life is the real US, our self-image and self-esteem gets involved.

Is Denzel Washington the part that he plays in his movies? No. He may feel the pain of his part if he really gets into the role, but at the end of the day, he is not that part. Well it is the same with our spirit Self as it plays the roles of human. Roles are behaviors; they are not identities.

Also remember that you cannot control what others say about you or how they perceive you. What matters only is how you perceive yourself. If you have a behavior that you want to change, change it. It has nothing to do with the Being of you; it does reflect your character (see the similarity to acting again - character?), and values but these things are fluid, they change.

Your consciousness is infinite; the only thing that constricts it is your own perceptual system - the way you wire your brain and mind. You want to play a bigger game in life? Then upgrade your parts. Until you learn how to do this, you will "get played" by the projections of others and the disempowering stories that you unconsciously create for yourself via these parts. Come and learn how to retrain your brain to win at life from the inside out. Your self-image and level of confidence can be aligned with your inner Authentic Self for true empowerment. What do you think?