Communication Between Husband And Wife: Save Your Marriage By Helping Your Spouse Open Up - No Communication Between Husband And Wife

One of the important factors needed to sustain a marriage is open communication between the partners. Sometimes, one partner may have something to share but may find it difficult to open up. On such occasions, the other partner can save the marriage by helping the reluctant partner to open up.

Have you sometimes felt that your spouse has something to share with you but has some problem in opening up? If you have, did you ask them what was in their mind? It would have been very easy to have made your spouse pour out their mind by using a simple trigger like 'You want to say something?' But if you have not done so, you have lost a great opportunity to put your marriage back on rails.

If this has happened in your life, you need to ponder over what was holding you back. It might not have been your ego but a reluctance on your part, for no particular reason. There are times in our life when we know what is to be done but for some reason, don't bring ourselves to do it.

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By failing to do the thing required of us at the appropriate time, we may end up losing certain things in life. The wise thing to do will be to learn from our past mistakes and do the right things during future occasions. All we need to do is to program our minds to act appropriately if a similar situation were to arise in future. Fortunately, life is kind enough to give us more opportunities similar to the ones we missed in the past. But if you keep missing opportunities repeatedly, you may sometimes reach a stage when there will be no further opportunities.

Think what prevented you from prompting your spouse when you knew that they were about to open up and share their feelings with you. Perhaps you were afraid what they might say would make you feel guilty. Perhaps you were not prepared to come out with a response to the issues they might rise. Ultimately, it was a kind of a fear - a fear that you would be shaken out of your comfort and brought out in the open.

Ask yourself whether or not you are interested in saving your marriage. If you are, then you should be willing to do something from your side even if you feel that the fault lies with the other side. If you can help your spouse open up by prompting them or encouraging them, you will be giving a powerful impetus to the task of saving your marriage.

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Yes relationships require attention. That is a given yet so many times they go on neglected as if they can be left on autopilot and everything will work itself out in time. Don't wait until there is a problem, be proactive in your relationship and build a fortress around it before the storms come.

The youthful enthusiasm of a new relationship brings with it the visions of a perfect life together. Mutual agreement is a way of life and as we move blissfully along the path of partner perfection it is far too frequent that we are lulled in to complacency and denial that we may someday need to face the reality that relationships require attention.

I've heard it said that ninety percent of success is in just showing up. That being said, relationships will idle along if both partners simply show up. With no expectations beyond that from either partner they will experience a mediocre relationship at best and quite possibly some people never aspire to anything more. My heart goes out to them for they are not living their life to its fullest potential.

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What happened to the other ten percent? You know, the ten percent that goes beyond showing up. The couple that finds themselves always striving to each give one hundred percent to their spouse or partner are the ones who will truly find success and joy in the end. The couple who looks at their relationship as a fifty/fifty split? They have been woefully mislead. Perfection is not found in balanced numbers, perfection is found in two individuals working for the best for the marriage or relationship.

So what does that kind of relationship look like? It is a relationship built on trust, honesty, integrity, openness and a continued sense of belonging. Where a couple is able to let their guard down and remain open and vulnerable to their partner knowing they will never be judged or scorned. Each partner dutifully engages the other, carefully listening to and lovingly responding to the needs of the other. This couple seeks to understand not to win individual battles.

To live this way takes some effort. It requires a commitment from each other to choose this way over traditional roles and potentially negative behaviors. It requires mutual respect and admiration. Whether you are able to make subtle shifts to live this way or if you find yourself headed down a less positive path there is always hope for a better way. Even if only one partner is currently interested in making the shift it is possible for them to affect change in the relationship.

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You can't really afford the risk of confusing your child on which faith to believe. Sooner or later, your child will ask questions why daddy or mommy goes to different churches/temples and how come his/her parents are praying to different gods.

This kind of situation can confuse a child. For a person to develop a strong faith when he/she grows up, he/she needs to develop it during childhood. However, getting confused with two different beliefs can be just as bad.

You should realize that there's no turning back now. From the very beginning you made a choice to fall in love with someone that has different practices than you. And now that you're married, it is the right time for you to stand by that choice and prove your conviction to it.

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You also need to have faith, not only to your religion but in your marital relationship. As they say, faith believes without seeing. You need to believe that your relationship will work out just fine even if you aren't seeing evidence at the moment.

It's true that there are a lot of risks when you have different beliefs. For one, you may get into arguments in your relationship. Additionally, you may have problems when establishing values for your family. This is especially true when your beliefs are extremely opposite from each other.

However, the most important thing is that you need to work out your differences. This is because it is vital for the two of you to be in harmony, so that your marriage and family's future will be strong. Try to talk things over, so that you can maintain a stable marriage even if you have different point of views in life.

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Trust is probably the most important component in any romantic relationship. If there is no trust, then your relationship has no life-blood, and soon it will die. Unlike love, trust is something that you have to build. While love will happen as a result of other things, trust will not just happen like that, it has to be cultivated.

Let us look at some of the negatives of not having a healthy level of trust in your relationship.

* Suspicion and jealousy thrive where there is little or no trust.

If you do not have the sense that you can trust your partner, that you have a good sense of what will or will not be done in a given circumstance then your mind is going to be all over the place wondering if his or her behavior was appropriate. First comes the suspicion and then the jealousy.

* Intimacy suffers where there is a tendency to not be open.

One of the effects of not being able to trust your partner is that you find it hard to be open with him or her. If you are not able to be extremely open, then the level and quality of intimacy in the relationship will suffer.

* Anxiety builds and causes personal stress and stress on the relationship.

One of the most debilitating things that can happen to any relationship, never mind a romantic one, is for excessive anxiety and stress to be constantly present. It is debilitating because it saps your emotional and physical energy leaving you with not much to give to the relationship itself. Instead of your energies being spent on nurturing the relationship, you are taken up with just trying to get through each emotional storm swirling in your head.

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* Love cannot thrive in the absence of trust.

The love that should emerge in a romantic relationship will not be there where trust is deficient. In the context of this type of relationship, where sharing openly is so important, where feeling of mutual support and respect has to be present, it is almost impossible to have these where the trust is lacking. So even though there may be love there, it is difficult for it to manifest itself on a day-to-day basis and in your daily interactions.

Trust affects so many aspects of your relationship that it should be considered an important life-blood. If it is not present there is a good chance that as the different components of your relationship suffer then the relationship itself will eventually die.

So how do you take steps to give your relationship more of this life-blood called trust?

* Make a mutual commitment to talk about issues. Talk about not only the negative issues, but also the positive issues in your relationship. Of course the negative ones you will want to try to resolve and the positive ones you will want to celebrate together.

* Share your aspirations, your values and your fears. This may sound easy but when we actually get down to doing it, it can be extremely difficult. And it is difficult for the simple reason that there are so many risks involved - the risk of being looked at as weird, of not seeming normal or even of sounding a bit naive. But it is precisely for this very reason why it is so important to share at this level. When we do so, it frees us from the associated fears and send a message to our partner that we trust them to honor what we are sharing. This makes it that much easier for them to respond in kind thus building mutual trust.

Without trust, your relationship will seem anemic, having little or no energy and will eventually die. The only way to prevent this from happening is to take the time to build that trust so that it will have the vibrancy in which love can manifest daily.

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.

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