Do you know what roles and duties God has assigned you in your marriage? Why do you think God gave certain roles to the wife and certain roles to the husband? God created for husband and wife to share in the same goals but have different roles. Together they compliment one another and work together in harmony.

To be able to define the role of husbands in marriage, we must also define the role of wives in marriage. God equips men and women for various tasks, but all of these tasks should lead to the same goal—honoring God. We honor God by following His commands for marriage.

But for Adam no suitable helper was found. So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. Genesis 2:25

Why did God not make woman out of the dust of the ground like he did man? God made Eve out of the rib of Adam to illustrate that in marriage a man and a woman symbolically become one flesh. God chose to make woman out of the flesh and bones of the man. With God’s help Adam gave life to Eve. Man gives life to the woman while the woman gives life to the world through childbearing.

Throughout the bible God treats marriage very seriously. If you are married now or soon to be married are you willing to keep the commitment that makes the two of you one flesh? God’s purpose for marriage is complete oneness between couples. This is why it is so important for husband and wife to respect each others God-given roles and responsibilities in marriage.

A Christian husbands duty is to put his wife’s comfort and welfare above his own. This is the model of the living symbol of Christ and the church.

Husbands love your wives just as Christ does the church and gave himself up for her, to make her holy by the washing of water through the word. (Ephesians 5:25-26)

For a man of God it is naturally instinctive for him to want to protect and provide for his lovingly submissive and respectful wife. A Christian wife is commanded to respect her husband’s leadership role by submitting to his authority in the Lord.

…And the wife must respect her husband. (Ephesians 5:33)

The bible clearly lets us know that the husband is the spiritual head of the marriage and family, meaning he protects, provides and cares for his wife and children in the ways of the Lord. This is what spiritual headship is.

For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which is the Savior. (Ephesians 5:22-23)

Submitting to your husband is an often-misunderstood concept. It doesn’t mean to become a doormat. On the contrary, it means to follow your husband’s leadership that is in Christ. Ironically when a wife submits her own life to Christ it becomes easier to obey God’s command to submit to her husband. If she is rebellious or even nonchalant to what the bibles says it is easier to rebel to what the word says. Do you see how that works?

In marriage both husband and wife are called to submit to each other. For the wife it is submitting to her husband’s leadership. For the husband it means to put aside his own interests in order to care for his wife.

A man of God will not take advantage of his leadership role. And a woman of God will not try and undermine her husband’s leadership role and take over for him in that arena. When a wife usurps her husband’s spiritual authority or when a husband abuses his authority it causes disunity, chaos and friction between couples.

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