We seem to spend all of our time placing the responsibility for what is going wrong in our lives outside of ourselves. We use the well worn emotional tools of shame, guilt, blame and unforgiveness to ensure that we remain in our self-created unhappy place.

If it is always somebody else’s fault then we do not have to take responsibility for the unhappiness, and misery that is in our lives. Fine, that serves the purpose of you always looking like the good guy, and it is a great way to get sympathy, everyone loves a good victim story, but is it creating the life that you truly want?

If it is such a good deal, why do you feel so unfulfilled, incomplete? This type of behavior stops us from reaching our true potential. It keeps us stuck in a prison of our own creation. It denies us from tapping into our authentic selves.

While we are pointing the finger of blame, we are giving away our personal power. When we wallow in guilt, and self recrimination, we are giving away our personal power. When we stubbornly refuse to forgive, because we are stuck on the principle, we are giving away our personal power.

This all adds up to destruction, on a massive scale. Nothing is untouched by the toxicity of these behaviours. These are the true weapons of massive destruction, they are not missing at all, they are a part of everyday life. The poison of these actions will continue to impact your ability to become happy, whole and complete. You have a choice!

I know you don’t want to hear that, your first reaction is ..but, but, but….. you don’t understand, my story is different. I say to you, the only difference is the names, dates and settings, the rest remains the same. The outcome is predictable, the refusal to take total ownership of your life creates pain.

Once you learn to love you, love your life, warts and all, incredible changes can happen. It is this core belief of not being good enough, not being loveable, of deservability which is creating this web of misery. Change that, and everything gets thrown out the window. All these destructive processes are just thoughts, and the amazing thing about thoughts is they can be changed.

The question is are you willing to change the habits of a life time?

The answer is, has what you have been doing, bought you the life that you want?

Author's Bio: 

Certified YOU CAN HEAL YOUR LIFE teacher
certificate 4 in Frontline Management
Currently studying a BA at University