Spirituality, You and Money

Spirituality, You and Money
By Danielle Gault

Years ago I attended a Money and You Workshop because I felt that money is an expression of spiritual life. Money represents energy and energy fulfills things through beliefs, values and actions. How we think, feel, and handle our money is a direct reflection of how we position ourselves in this physical world. Since we are physical beings made of the earth, we are drawn to things of the earth. Food, shelter, clothing, power; these are finite things. Within this finiteness are parameters that can shape our lives. If we are wise, we use these parameters for making good decisions. But why then do some people find themselves constantly in debt while other people hoard their money?

Personality temperament can provide a format for developing self-awareness of how we use money. For example in the Money and You Workshop, there was an experiential exercise where we had so much time and so many pieces of paper that represented money that we could use any way we saw fit. After the exercise, we counted what we had and the person who had the most pieces of paper money won. I had the most money at the end of the exercise not because I was hoarding but because of what I did. Here’s what I did. I sat there and offered to give people a reflexology treatment, something I am trained to do and something I love to do.

While performing my services, one participant offered to be my manager. I agreed and he proceeded to sell my services to others. Because I was doing what I naturally enjoyed doing and he was doing what he naturally enjoyed doing which was marketing, I had the most money when the exercise ended mainly because I didn’t have time to spend any money. My manager, because he went around the room, spent some of his money to engage others in my service living the idea that it takes money to make money. I learned from that exercise: do what you love to do in the service of others and money will flow your way.

Through many years of learning, developing, and delivering personality workshops, I clearly see four distinctive patterns:

Some people focus more on security, safety, and the physical world which I relate to the element of earth.

Other people focus more on relation building, harmony, feelings, and the social world of connecting with others which I relate to the element of water.

Still others focus more on distilling complicated topics into bullet points, solving immediate problems and connecting and moving ideas forward which I relate to the element of fire.

And there are people who focus on ideas, systems, overviews and the mental world of new ways to see things which I relate to the element of air.

Struggles with money indicate opportunities for reflection in learning how to use money as a tool for spiritual discernment. Recently we had four different visitors to our summer home in New Zealand. Having a home in New Zealand and being on a fixed income was a new experience and as New Zealand is a long journey, we started having long-term visitors. Our struggle was how to receive people while honoring each others’ parameters – theirs and ours.

One visitor expressed himself as the earth element which can be characterized by more inwardness, not as chatty as some of the other elements, a slower pace, and a deliberate, thoughtful approach to spending. As time with this person wore on, we noticed he never offered to pay for gas, chip in for groceries, or when we went out to eat, meagerly ordered for himself while eating our leftovers. We knew this person had a decent nest-egg, a good pension, and was debt-free; something an earth element person would clearly strive for in his need for wealth and security. Our resentment grew as we began counting the days to his departure. We choose not to address the situation because we were afraid we would say something we might regret.

Because he was an in-law that we’ve known for many years we didn’t want our resentment to get in the way of our connection with him so after a few months went by, we decided to call and ask if he was having financial difficulties as he appeared to be concerned about spending money while visiting us. He said, no, he wasn’t concerned about money but that he had put himself on a budget. This explanation did nothing to warm the cockles of our hearts and we determined that in honoring ourselves, we needed to be more upfront with long-term visitors. His relationship with money showed what Benjamin Franklin said -- he that is of the opinion money will do everything may well be suspected of doing everything for money.

Our second visitor was more the water element expression. We knew this person, now in his mid-seventies, had had a round of unfortunate financial set backs and the likelihood of getting financially on his feet was slim. Typical of the water person, in striving to serve others, he wanted to pay for more than his share. And in our concern for him, we looked for ways to buy food and gas when he wasn’t around. During his visit, using feng shui, he prepared our house for re-sale which resulted in an excellent offer within a few days. After the house sold, we sent our friend a $500 marketing fee. He resisted the money but we insisted thanking him for his service. Billy Graham said if a person gets his attitude toward money straight, it will help straighten out almost every other area in his life. We hope our friend in his service to others will keep some wealth for himself.

Our third visitor, a closer relative and someone I am more familiar with, came and I, perhaps a little too zealously, wanted to be straightforward about money. After the first two visitors, I longed to bring up the discussion from the start and proceeded to propose a system for sharing expenses. He wanted nothing to do with my system and said things would work out.

I’d say this person represented the fire element because, as is typical of fire people, they often find themselves at the starting gate revving to get into the race. Never remaining too long on one track, they can be seen going from race track to race track which can also be true in their partnerships. As this was his third marriage, we had to get use to another wife. Fire people are constantly starting over as they get disillusioned by others. When this happens, they seek out a solution to relieve their inner tension. Never comfortable with inner tension for very long, their life appears to be solving one problem after another.

Once their force is released in whatever context they are in, you will find that people’s wills are usually bent in their direction. And so, thrown upon myself and sometimes confused when it came to opening the purse, I seemed to have no choice; we were going to do it his way. The good thing about fire people is that there is never a dull moment. Everything you do with them is faster than a speeding bullet. When things don’t go their way, however, their internal tension, expressed outwardly, comes across as very critical and over powering.

Fire element people live to solve problems and if there aren’t any immediate problems, they seem to create them. If their world becomes too stable, as in the case of the earth element person who strives for profound stability and the least expenditure of energy, fire people seem to constantly expend energy. Their spiritual struggle in life is that they forget to build down. Being inclined this way because they fail to learn from past experiences, they tend to go through resources quickly; never satisfied with what they have, they can take, grab, use, and often not replenish. When this happens, other people can feel left behind in a cloud of smoke wondering what just happened.

So I gave up my need to have a system and trusted that our visitor’s way of dealing with money would be fair – which by the way, it was. We had a good time because he and his partner enjoyed everything we did, we spent money doing just exactly what we all wanted to do, and they were always upbeat. So, once I let go of my struggle to have a system, I lived out of his system and Robert Frost’s saying – never ask of money spent where the spender thinks it went. Nobody was ever meant to remember or invent what he did with every cent.

Our last visitors were people we didn’t know very well. I determined the husband to be an air element expression because I found myself acting a little more formally when around him. We didn’t discuss money because there seemed no pressure to get it out into the open. They were polite and considerate and our discussions were more around world issues and planetary problems in the bio-geo-sphere. Although the time together went quickly, I don’t remember too much laughter and certainly no problems but a great deal of civility.

Air element people tend to be like clouds. They are present, you can see them, but then they disappear. They can be formal, detached, and conceptual. Drawn toward the world of ideas, they live in a creative flow of future possibilities. A natural distain for disagreement coupled with a need for recognition of their competencies, the air-element person is not easy to know.

Our visitors came and went and we carried on preparing for our journey back to Canada amazed at the differences in the people we hosted. Seeing people from an elemental expression of air, fire, water, and earth helped us to understand and broaden our responses to our guests. As flowers require different amounts of sunlight, water, soil, and nourishment, people require different ways of interacting and this is especially true when dealing with money issues. Using the elements of air, fire, water, and earth, we can shed light on our use of money by how it flows in and out of our lives. Does it flow out too quickly or do we hold on to it too tightly?

Earth people are never secure in the feeling of having enough money. To spiritually expand their view of themselves, they need to loosen up and spread their money around more. To develop spiritually, fire people must decide to hold on to their money because money comes in and goes out with them. Unless they stop this natural process, they never gain wealth and if they do, they lose it only to rebuild it and lose it again. Water people, in order to expand themselves need to put themselves in the equation when it comes to money as they tend to put others first. And air people don’t pay much attention to things of earth but float in space trying to avoid addressing money issues when interacting with others. They could place more value on mundane things that seem insignificant to them but which could increase their connections to others.

Money can be a tool for identifying and working with our struggles in life. Ayn Rand said, “Ask yourself -- did you get your money by fraud, by pandering to men’s vices, by lowering your standards, by doing work you despise for purchases you scorn? If so, then your money will not give you a penny’s worth of joy.”

Money is not the root of all evil. How we handle our money is really a direct reflection of how we think, feel and act. It is our energy; an expression of our life flow.

An anonymous person wrote, “Money can’t buy friendship – friendship must be earned. Money can’t buy a clear conscience – square dealing is the price tag. Money can’t buy the glow of good health – right living is the secret. Money can’t buy happiness – happiness is a mental condition. Money can’t buy a good character – good character is achieved through decent habits of private living and wholesome dealings in our open contacts with our fellow men.

Because money is a great tool for spiritual enlightenment, it’s amazing how life straightens out once people get a grip on their attitude toward money.