For many years, I have been waiting to go to Paris because I have been told of the stories of abundant romance along the streets of Champs de Elysee and the lights on the Eiffel Tower.
I managed to scrape out the time and money after university, and so I was packed up and on a plane to Charles De Gaulle!
Have you been to Paris before? The minute you are off the plane, and on a cab into the taxi, the energy of the city sucks you in. It is an amazing place where you stand in awe of all things beautiful and all things creative. The streets are bustling – every sensory node in your body becomes alive at the bright lights, captivating smells and cacophony of sounds.
I had a wonderful time in Paris, but I came back disappointed - the place was really not that romantic. You get the same branded boutiques in Zurich and with friendlier staff who speak English. The Eiffel Tower is really a telephone mast, and you cannot even get close to see the Mona Lisa.
But you know what – it is true. The couples who roam the streets there, especially the tourists are really happy, playful and in love. The city itself might not be the most romantic physically, but it is filled with an air of romance. It is not just the passionate people, because you get passionate people in other countries as well, like Latin America and India.
So, what makes the streets of France infectious with romance, while other countries with passionate people are not as famously known to be cities of romance? Well, the answer can be found succinctly in a Lonely Planet. The highly astute guidebook says in there that tourists to Paris should approach the locals in French whenever you want to begin a conversation. It is perfectly acceptable if your French is halting, broken and unintelligible. Otherwise, your chances of being snubbed are very high.
If Boeuf, Poisson, Poulet, do not mean anything to you, you would probably starve in France. Do not expect English subtitles on the menus. In every new country, you visit it is always good to read up ahead first, though how many people actually do that? Many people travel to gawk at the foreign country rather than immerse themselves in that culture. In France, it is not an option, learn first or suffer on the streets.
Hence, couples who travel to Paris, expect to go there to learn and absorb the culture and lifestyles of the Parisian. You and your partner definitely have to come together to learn a couple of words of French, to crack your brains together to decipher the city map and to have the coded laugh at the idiosyncrasies of the French!
This fun and complex learning process brings two people together more than any amount of discussion of politics, office gossips or shopping. Learning a new language and culture is like learning a new way of living.
This is the secret to overflowing romance in a beautiful relationship – creating a new way of living for two people who come together. If you carry on living your life in the same pattern as you would as an individual than you are merely two buddies living under the same roof.
Just like the couples who go to Paris and come back swearing that it is the most romantic place in the world. Relationships can be transformed into fantasies, and problems effortlessly overcome when two people share a common goal and journey.
When you make an effort to learn new ways to cope with finances, in-laws, friends, health, money and career, you take a step together towards the future.
The way you buy things, the things you buy, the events that make you angry, the events that make you happy; all these should be reconstructed with a new framework. A set of lifestyle guidelines that were created by both of you and for both of you. It is making a commitment to start a new life together as a couple.
Romance is the reward for suspending our insecurities and stepping up the courage to live a new way of life.
A trip to Paris is the fastest and deepest way to experience that. Whatever fears you have about speaking a new language disappears when you know that you need to speak it to order your food!
Two couples who just start dating also feel hopelessly romanced because they are always kept on their toes and suspend all their insecurities and allow themselves to be surprised and do things that they usually do not do.
The United States Marines Corp break down their recruits and then train them up with a new set of rules and identity to live by. These soldiers become fiercely loyal and highly motivated to achieve success for the team. Their secret, like in a relationship, is in the creation of new rules for living.
Unfortunately, most couples kill their romance after the first year because they start to listen more to their insecurities and resent learning a new language – building a new way of living with their partner. Instead, they start to insist on rules that were passed down from previous generations.
This cycle can start with a small quarrel like how often to sweep the floor and one person insists on doing it every day because that is how it used to be done at home. Day by day, this can escalate into issues like fear of loss and fear of dependency.
Ultimately, when fears and insecurity lingers in a relationship, there will be no courage to create a new platform for a new family. And of course, where there is insecurity and the absence of courage, there will also be the absence of romance.
To allow romance to flow abundantly, we need to create a world with our own rules, it then becomes our own world and we will feel invested in it. It works for couples and it works for the military. When two people learn to speak a new language together, they become bonded for life. They create a new identity for themselves and become new persons as husbands, wives, fathers and mothers.
Approach our life forward with hearts open, and willingness to try new things to create unique rules and standards for our relationships. It is this journey that will bond and reward you with romance, not the actual rules themselves.
If you feel that your relationship has gone bland and you are wondering if you can ever find that romance again. The good news is you can. It is a simple formula that can be immediately incorporated into your life to spark romance all over again.
Create the right environment for romance to flourish and it will come into your life, just like honey always attracts the bees. Learn the skills to embark on the journey towards lifelong romance. Create your own unique rules in every aspect of your relationship, be it wealth, career or family living.
Join us at a Create Unstoppable Passion Workshop (http://www.CreateUnstoppablePassion.com.sg/eventdetails/) to experience a relationship filled with passion and romance!
Looking forward to Love and Passion in Your Relationship,
Winston Ng
(Original Article: http://www.createunstoppablepassion.com.sg/articles/romance-in-paris.htm)
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About the Author
The author, Winston Ng, is an avid peak performance coach and CEO of Inner Health Technologies Pte. Ltd., based in Singapore. His Relationship and Health Consultancy programmes are renowned worldwide for their efficiency, simplicity and independent unbiased advice.
The team at Create Unstoppable Passion(TM) is internationally renowned for providing sure-fire Relationship Strategies for Couples wanting to seek a deeper connection with each other and knowing that their relationships can be more than where they are right now.
They want you to experience their service before spending a single dime with them. Receive FREE Relationship Consultation for any questions about your relationship! Get first-hand updates of their highly-in-demand relationship blog posts, articles and videos when you subscribe to their e-Community. Log on to www.CreateUnstoppablePassion.Com.Sg now!
Learn the real system to create a life of never-ending Fairy Tale Romance and Wild Fantasies. Be an inspiration of love, romance, achievement and success to those around you. Commit to your relationship now! Winston Ng and his Coaches can be contacted at www.CreateUnstoppablePassion.Com
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