Hello there,

This is part one of a series of articles written for my newsletter called "Lifeskills".

If you would like the follow up emails please email me at inorthcott@lineone.net and I will forward them to you.(Put "Self Growth Laws of Influence" in the title.

I would like to thank Dr Chiadlini and Kevin Hogan for their excellent books and study on this subject.



When someone gives you something of perceived value, you immediatelyrespond with the desire to give something back.

As Kevin Hogan says, the law does not state that they will givesomethingback, just that they will have the desire to do so. That said it isan extremely powerful law.

I am wondering how many of you receive an unexpected Christmas cardfromsomeone, maybe a colleague at work. Then did you dash aroundtrying tofind a card to send right back to them? If you did, that is thelaw of reciprocity playing on your mind!

How many times have you received a free gift from a charity such asa pen and in the same envelope a donation request? They don't do itto lose money do they?

Who feels obliged to tip in a restaurant? Is it because theybought us food?Even though consciously we know it is their job. (The law ofconformity comes into play here too. More on that later).

Free samples of beauty products are not given away for any otherreason thatto get you to buy.

How many of you have heard the term "Loss Leader"? That is whena trader will lead with an item to sell to you that he may losemoneyon. The trader knows that once he is seen to be "giving yousomething",even a discount, you will feel the pressure of this law.

Many people say at my seminars that they are wise to all this. WellI just kow that so am I. BUT, I am also realistic enough to knowthatI am still being influenced. I can't help it.

It is important to remember that recipocation is not all bad. Thatis howrelationships are built on. The difficulties start when it goesinto that manipulation area!!

Cialdini quotes lots of experiments where this rule was proved. One involved the selling of raffle tickets and the "seller" bought the "subject" a coke before the request to buy was made and on anotheroccasionjust made the buy request with no coke. The study showed that therewas more compliance when the RULE OF RECIPROCITY was used. It was further shown that this had nothing to do with liking the "Seller".

I strongly reccomend Dr Chialdini's book for more in depth readinon thesubject.

So you have the first rule. Go and play with it and likeeverything HAVE FUN and aim to create that WIN/WIN situation.

Author's Bio: 

Ian Northcott is a personal performance coach and an expert in motivation. Visit Ian's website at www.transformationstrategies.co.uk