How To Improve Your Intimate Relationship Part 3

In part 3 part of this 4 part series, we will look at several more practical ways to improve our intimate relationship, to strike the match and set the inner fires of passion burning.

So far we have discovered a major shift of attitude regarding our intimate relationships, a shift of focus that applies to other kinds of relationships as well, such as parent, family, friends and business, and the shift is that we do not have to control others to make ourselves happy. Our happiness must well up from within if we are ever to feel truly safe in loving others freely.

We have already opened the way for a new understanding, a more expanded appreciation of the quality of this new type of love relationship. It is characterised by personal empowerment, integrity and authenticity, trust and openness, allowingness and unconditional love, which are the core magnetic attractor factors for a genuine love relationship to flourish and build. But we still need to work toward this advanced level of relationship, and we have to work with who we are and how we feel today. We will now explore relationship interaction from this perspective now.

Current Gender Roles

Let’s turn to the interplay of masculine/feminine energies, of how we can join in the dance of interactive polarities, of male-female complementarity. Basically, the masculine role is to give and protect, and the feminine role is to receive and nurture. These roles are clearly physical first, and determine how we play out our emotional roles within our relationship.

The masculine energy is one of strength, commitment and passion, while the feminine energy is playful, seductive and sexy. It is how we identify with our role that will determine our capacity to love and complement our partner and create the magic of intimacy.

Not In a Relationship?

If you are currently not in a relationship, this information is still very much for you, because it applies to your relationship with yourself. Before we can develop a wonderful relationship outside of self, we have to nurture a deep connection with our own inner energy. Single or in a relationship, it is our inner connection to self, our self love, which matters most.

If you want to be in a relationship, you can begin to build it from within by becoming the kind of person who can attract the quality of mate you desire. You attract according to your inner energy vibration, so that is where you have to focus your love and joy. You do not have to wait until you have found your lover; it actually works the other way around. Change yourself and your whole world will change accordingly. Begin to feel your lover close, to feel the joy of closeness and intimacy, for these feelings of love and joy that you carry around within you will create and attract the lover you deserve.

Dance of the Sexes

Being aware of the differences between the sexes is paramount. We all know there are huge differences, but how we approach them writes the story of our intimate relationship happiness. We will necessarily make archetypal gender assumptions here, to clarify the complementarity of a man and a woman, each playing their gender role.

Men freely feel and express their sexuality, while many women are shut down – indicating their fear of being able to live up to the fullness of who they are. We still live at the end of a patriarchal epoch, one in which, for millennia, women have been subjugated to men. This is radically changing now, but most women still bear the karmic scars of this inferiority. Many women know they can do intimacy, but do not feel it, and without the feeling there will be no ecstasy.

They may be afraid to succeed, to give themselves permission to succeed, to be all they can be. Such usually unconscious beliefs have a huge impact on a woman’s life, especially her sex life, causing restraint, negative emotional outbursts or feeling shut-down.

In the next and final part of this 4 part series on intimate relationships, we will take a look at her needs and how he can meet them, and then look at his needs and how she can meet them, so stay tuned. Then we will conclude our series on Intimate Relationships, not that we will have said all there is to be said, but that we should have some kind of expanded vision of the possibilities of how thrilling and immensely empowering a loving sexual relationship can be.