Principles of Effective Work Relationships

How many times have you left a meeting simmering with fury over the colleague who interrupted you each time you spoke? Have you spent precious time imagining how good it would feel to tell your co-worker what you really thought of her? How many hours have you wasted bemoaning the fact that your boss doesn’t acknowledge your contributions or appreciate your hard work?

Conflict in the workplace is the single largest contributor to job dissatisfaction. From the colleague who covertly presents your ideas as her own, to the co-worker who wastes your time with gossip, you are forced to work with people you would never elect to spend time with; were you given that choice. This inevitably creates frustration and disappointment.

Yet, these individuals are part of your reality, and your ability to work effectively with them will take you straight up the corporate ladder. Your inability to do so will not only keep you stuck, it will decrease your enjoyment of a position you might otherwise love.

The principles of working well with others are simple, yet profound. They are simple, in that they are easy to apply. They are profound, in that applying them has the potential to literally transform your working relationships.

Find The Strength In Every Person

Everyone is good at something. Make a decision to identify each of your co-workers’ gifts. Once you identify the strengths of your colleagues, acknowledge them for their talent, and encourage them to apply those abilities to the projects you’re collaborating on. While the man in the office next to yours might have a maddening personal habit, his gift for graphics could turn your presentation into an outstanding visual display.

Your genuine acknowledgement of your office mate’s strength will help you establish an effective professional connection. While you don’t need to enjoy your colleagues, mutual respect and appreciation will allow you to enjoy the time you must spend with them.

Communicate Clearly

One of the most dangerous things you can do in any relationship is to make assumptions. Assuming that your colleagues understand both what you say and why you said it sets you up for misunderstanding. In addition, assuming you understand the intricacies of your co-workers’ communications increases the likelihood that you’ll misinterpret their words.

You must communicate clearly and completely when interacting with others. If you have something to say, clearly express your thoughts or feelings in a constructive a manner. Do not allow innuendo to enter your communication. This makes you appear immature and unprofessional.

If you find yourself on the other end of an innuendo, or you simply you don’t understand what your colleague has expressed, ask for clarification. All relationships are based on communication. Your ability to clearly share, request, and exchange information will be one of the most pivotal and profound skills you’ll bring to your work.

Don’t Take Things Personally

Have you ever walked by someone at the office, said hello, and been surprised when they brushed right past you? Did this cause you to begin wondering what you could have done to upset them? Perhaps you wasted several minutes worrying about what might be wrong, only to find out that the person had been preoccupied with something that had nothing to do with you?

The truth is, most of your interactions with colleagues don’t have anything to do with you. How could you possibly know that the marketing director has a sick mother, and hasn’t been getting much sleep? What would have given you a clue that the secretary is having financial problems, and has worried herself sick?

While work takes up a large portion of most people’s lives, it makes up only one component of them. Everyone you work with has families to care for, bills to pay, homes to manage, and dreams to go for.

The next time someone speaks to you in a harsh tone of voice, or brushes past you without saying hello, let it go. Nine out of ten times, the nature of the interaction was not a reflection on how that person feels about you. If you do feel compelled to respond, approach the situation with a degree of respect, humility, and compassion. Remember that you’re not just talking with the mailroom clerk, you’re also talking with a father, husband, son, and brother.

When you look at your colleagues in a holistic manner, it will become easy for you to let the little things go, because they likely have very little to do with you.

Keep Your Eye on the Ball

What product or service does your company provide? Why were you hired, and what are you responsible for? Consider the projects you’ve been assigned. What is your goal? Your ability to maintain focus on the purpose at hand; no matter what types of interpersonal challenges you encounter, will ensure your professional success.

While it may be easy to participate in office politics, taking this approach will inevitably lead you down a path of loss. Ultimately, your career is designed to allow you to provide for yourself and your family. Ideally, it should provide you with opportunities to discover your creativity, develop your skills, and contribute to others. These aims require focus, determination, and consistency.

Reconnect with the objectives that caused you to embrace your current career. Allow yourself to dream about the level of success you’d like to experience, and take steps each day to bring yourself closer to that goal.

When you start to play the game of business using these rules, you will begin to win far more frequently than you lose. You will also begin to enjoy more productive and purposeful relationships at work. Ultimately, these are the circumstances that lead you to the big win; a job you enjoy and a life you love.